The A Team, Season 2

Vanatta:
What are you gonna do with us?

Face:
Well, we were thinking maybe we'd tie you to a tree and leave you for the lions. They like a little snack at night.

Murdock:
Yeah, they get the munchies, right after Carson.

Hannibal:
Could try the old Indian trick.

Face:
Stake 'em out over an anthill?

Hannibal:
I've always liked it.

Face:
Uh, I don't know. I'm not sure how I'd get the ants to go for these two.

Murdock:
Oh, that's easy. Just stick an ice-cream cone right in their pocket.

Vanatta:
You guys are crazy.

Hannibal:
Oh, he's crazy. We're just bad-tempered. Okay, start walking.

Vanatta:
What, you are letting us go?

Hannibal:
For now.

Vanatta:
We'll never make it back on foot.

Hannibal:
Try it on your hands and knees.

Murdock:
[sings] I'm Bogey the Bear, I'm covered with hair!

Murdock:
I'm Bogey the B-- [Bogey gets his head shot off by gorillas] Oh you'll be sorry you did that! [opens up fire with a large machine gun]

Face:
You don't have a plan, do you?

Hannibal:
Of course I have a plan. But it's a secret.

Hannibal:
[to Prince] If you don't take your hand off of me, your family will wear black.

Prince:
[referring to Face who pretends to be a guy called Jerry] Jones, Garcia, why don't you show Jerry here what a nice street we got outside? Just make sure when he lands he don't hit my new car.

[Murdock is laying on the tracks to hear if the train comes.]

Murdock:
No. No, I don't hear nothing.

[Murdock's horse nods.]

Murdock:
Are you sure?

[Horse whinnies and Murdock listens again.]

Murdock:
Well, I don't hear nothing but if you're positive that...

[B.A. grabs Murdock.]

B.A.:
I'm warning you, I've had enough of you talking to your invisible friend.

[Murdock points at his horse.]

Murdock:
Does he look invisible? You can't see HIM?

B.A.:
Invisible or not, I don't want you talking nothing to nobody. Got that?

Murdock:
Well, I'm sorry but I'm not the one with the bad attitude. When someone talks to me I feel obliged to respond in kind.

B.A.:
It's not a somebody! It's a horse! And horses don't talk!

Murdock:
[sings] A horse is a horse, of course and no one can talk to a horse, of course, unless of course (B.A. starts to strangle him) the horse, of course is the famous Mr. Ed.

Face:
[on the radio] Murdock, any sign?

[Murdock chokes on the radio.]

Face:
'[into the radio]' B.A., take your hand off Murdock's throat.

Murdock:
Yeah! [into the radio] Ed says ...

[B.A. grabs the radio.]

B.A.:
[into the radio] Ain't no train coming!

Face:
[to Hannibal] Who's Ed?

Hannibal:
Guess?

[Murdock's horse whinnies and train is audible.]

Murdock:
[into the radio] Train coming, muchachos. And I ain't tellin' you who told us.

Murdock:
[sings] I'm an old cowhand From Rio Grande and I learned to ride before I learned to stand.

B.A.:
You don't shut up I'll knock you off that horse!

[After the A-Team freed some wild mustangs.]

Murdock:
Once again, the mysterious Rider of the Range deals another triumphant blow for the rights of the oppressed.

Face:
[to a man] Don't ask.

Man:
I wasn't going to.

Murdock:
Hi, I'm Dr. Vern, veterinarian. And this [holds his hand up where is a sock] is my talking dog, Socki. Wuff!

B.A.:
And this is my talkin' fist. Its name is Knock-Out. Do you wanna hear Knock-Out speak?

Murdock:
No.

Hannibal:
If you lean on the Mayers once more you're gonna be shopping for some new kneecaps.

Decker and Captain Crane knock on the door to the Mayers. The son asks:
"Oh, you guys recruiting?"

[Face calls Hannibal.]

Hannibal:
Tomy Tillis? Crazy Tommy T?

Face:
That's right. Crazy Tommy T. A guy like that that has mob connections out that wazoo, you know what I mean?

Hannibal:
Yeah, but the question is, what's he got to do with Denham? And why put the pressure on Mickey to keep from putting his high-rise up?

Face:
Whatever the reason, Hannibal. I don't think we wanna get in this guy's way. Crazy Tommy T hits a wall head on and there's nothing left but a pile of bricks.

Hannibal:
Well, as soon as B.A. finishes paying off the crew, I'll take him and Murdock and I'll scout Denham. Now, you stick with Tillis. See what else you can find out.

Face:
Stick with Tillis? Hannibal, I didn't plan on making a career out of this. You know, I'm in my 'vette. Not exactly the most inconspicuous car to do a tail job in.

Hannibal:
That'll work for you. He'd never think that anybody could be crazy enough to follow him with a car as flashy as that.

Face:
You don't believe that?

Hannibal:
No, but thought you'd feel better. Bye.

Crazy Tommy T:
[to Face] Talk to me or I'll have Jilly here use your head for an anvil.

Crazy Tommy T:
You don't know you are messing with.

Hannibal:
Oh, yeah! I do. You're the king cockroach around here. Now, we can do this the hard way or the easy way. In about a minute, I and my three friends are gonna unleash on you your worst nightmare. You're gonna wish the earth opened up underneath your feet and swallowed you whole.

Crazy Tommy T:
What's the easy way?

Hannibal:
Oh, that was the easy way.

Sun Yeng:
[at her father’s side after the Lung Chin shoot up their restaurant] Dad. Are you okay?

Sam Yeng:
[observing the damage] Yes, but our partners, they’re not going to like this at all.

[Carrie Hicks notices title of the book hold by Murdock.]

Carrie Hicks:
“Abnormal Psychology”? Are you a psychologist, Mr. Murdock?

Murdock:
Eh, no, ma'am, I'm insane.

Carrie Hicks Oh...

Face:
Look Hannibal, there's about a hundred reasons why I hate this plan of yours, but my biggest objection, even bigger than my objection to letting someone else drive my 'vette, my biggest objection is sending the Golden Age of Television here to back up Tawnia while she's trying to scam a piece of scuzzy luggage like Harnett.

Murdock:
Thanks for the support, O Facial one.

Colonel Decker:
[on bullhorn] It's over, Smith. You lost.

Hannibal:
And I was having such a nice day.

Face:
Don't worry, he'll give us a minute like he always does.

Colonel Decker:
[on bullhorn] You have thirty seconds to give up your weapons before we open fire.

Hannibal:
Got to give the man credit. He's learning.

Hannibal:
Are these the only guys in the van, Murdock?

Murdock:
Yes, Sir. I checked for invisibles but they didn't have any with them.

[Murdock's got a plant which lives in B.A.'s van. Then the van gets stolen.]

B.A.:
Hey, man, he's taking my van!

Murdock:
B.A., will you stop acting like a crybaby? ... Wait a minute. Wait a minute. The little guy's in the van. They've got my plant! He's been plantnapped. Oh, they'll probably cut off a leaf and send it to me to prove they've got him.