The Batman, Season 3

[After possessed Batman starts attacking her]

Batgirl:
Guess you were serious about not wanting a sidekick!

Poison Ivy:
You're getting to be a real thorn in my side, Batman.

Batman:
And you're no rose, Poison Ivy.

Batman:
Let me make myself clear: there's no room for a Batgirl in Gotham.

Batgirl:
That's cool because it's Batwoman, as in, I'm a grown woman and don't need to listen to you.

Batman:
Then, for your own safety, if you won't listen to me, I'm gonna have to tell your father, Miss Gordon.

Batgirl:
Uh, you must have me confused with someone else. [Batman glares at her] Dude! You just broke the superhero secret identity code!

Commissioner Gordon:
I, uh, owe you my thanks, Batgirl.

Batgirl:
It's Batwo- Forget it. Batgirl, it is. Ok, then. Gotta go. Uh, you take care now, citizen.

Commissioner Gordon:
Another red? Huh. What are the chances?

Batgirl:
Just tell me that one day I'll get to meet the man behind the bat.

Batman:
Who says I'm a man?

Batgirl:
Hurry, Batman; you're about to have three sidekicks!

Barbara Gordon:
Muscles on his muscles, rich enough to finance all his gadgets... and a jawline I'd recognize anywhere! Oh, Brucie, you are so totally the Batman!

Penguin:
Batman?!? You're supposed to be pushing up clams!

Penguin:
I heard you got some back-up, Batman, but no one told me it was your baby sister!

[The intersecting lights from the 4 landmarks have formed an X over the harbor]

Alfred Pennyworth:
X marks the spot indeed.

D.A.V.E.:
You probably want to know how I uncovered your secret. It was simple, really. Using information readily available to anyone, I began by narrowing down Gotham's population of 750,832 males. Those not falling inside the Batman's probable age range of 18 to 36 were eliminated. Medical records revealed body type matches. Tax records indicated those who possess the wealth and resources to create his technology. But the true key to the puzzle was deducing who of the remaining candidates had motive to become the Batman. After all, every great hero must have an origin. And once Gotham's ultimate criminal mastermind put it all together, the answer was obvious. Bruce Wayne, son of the late Thomas and Martha Wayne. [Batman runs to Alfred. D.A.V.E. hits him.] So, Bruce Wayne, you no longer need to hide behind this. [Takes off his mask]

Batman:
Impressive. You have all the answers, D.A.V.E. Except one. Every great supervillain has an origin too. What's yours?

D.A.V.E.:
My origin? I… I… fell into a chemical bath.

Batman:
That's Joker.

D.A.V.E.:
A cryogenic mishap. No, I lost my family fortune.

Batman:
Freeze. Penguin.

D.A.V.E.:
I was a mad psychiatrist using Arkham as my cover.

Batman:
That's Professor Strange, your creator. You can't remember your origin because it doesn't exist. You're a computer program.

D.A.V.E.:
But I am Gotham's ultimate criminal mastermind. I consider all possibilities. How could I not have considered this?

Batman:
[hits him and presses the red button] You may not have a beginning. But now you have an end. [Giant coin crushes D.A.V.E.]