The Haunting of Hill House

Steven Crain:
I've seen a lot of ghosts. Just not the way you think. A ghost can be a lot of things. A memory, a daydream, a secret. Grief, anger, guilt. But, in my experience, most times they're just what we want to see. Most times, a ghost is a wish.

Theodora Crain:
[about Nell] What's wrong with her?

Shirley Crain:
I don't know.

Theodora Crain:
You never really will. One foot in crazy and the other on a banana peel. Her whole life.

Young Hugh Crain:
You remember what we talked about before? About our dreams?

Young Nell Crain:
They can spill.

Young Hugh Crain:
That's right. Yeah, just like a cup of water can spill sometimes. But kids' dreams are special. They're like...

Young Nell Crain:
An ocean.

Young Hugh Crain:
An ocean. That's right. And the big dreams can spill out sometimes.

[Shirley slams the manuscript on the table in front of Steven]

Shirley Crain:
The fuck, Steve?

Steven Crain:
[worried] You didn't like it.

Shirley Crain:
No, I didn't like it.

Leigh Crain:
What's going on?

Shirley Crain:
My brother raped the family, is what's going on.

Steven Crain:
Hang on...

Shirley Crain:
Look, I get that things haven't gone well for your writing, and when you said you wanted to do a book about the house, I understand that, but this...

Steven Crain:
I sent you guys the manuscript in case you had any objections. I didn't have to do that.

Shirley Crain:
Of course, we object. I object, Steve.

Leigh Crain:
Let's calm down a bit.

Shirley Crain:
You be calm, Leigh. It's not your name in here. It's not your family.

Leigh Crain:
OK, it is my family...

Shirley Crain:
You weren't here. [turns back to Steven] Nell, Luke, Theo, they were kids, the things they told you in confidence.

Steven Crain:
It's clear they were kids...

Shirley Crain:
You make Mom sound fucking crazy. And the Dudleys and Dad? This is the worst of the bullshit. Worse than the tabloids.

Steven Crain:
Dad had every opportunity to set that straight. What am I supposed to write? He said it was haunted. Those are his words.

Shirley Crain:
He was a wreck and he just lost his wife.

Steven Crain:
And he hasn't said SHIT since. Does he talk to you, Shirl? Does he talk to you about what happened that night? Because all I've got are those tabloid quotes. He refuses to tell us anything else.

Shirley Crain:
He believed it, Steve. When he said those things, he believed them. In the moment, at least, and you never did.

Steven Crain:
Neither did you.

Shirley Crain:
And now you're digging up that stuff for a buck? So you can stop living off credit for a change?

Steven Crain:
[frustrated] A buck?

Leigh Crain:
[to Shirley] Look, I can tell that you're upset, but Steve...

Steven Crain:
A buck? Do you know how much money they're offering on the advance? We can buy a house, we can move to L.A. We can... I need to start a life for my own family.

Shirley Crain:
We're our family, Steve. What you're doing to Mom...

Steven Crain:
Mom was mentally ill. It's a fact. I'll be damned if the apple didn't fall too far from... [he stops himself and Shirley is shaken by his words] I'm sorry.

Shirley Crain:
Wow.

Steven Crain:
I'm sorry. That was...

Shirley Crain:
Wow.

Steven Crain:
Nobody's buying the novel, Shirl.

Shirley Crain:
You gave me the book. Now you know what I think. You publish this, you know what it costs.

Young Shirley Crain:
Where's Mom?

Young Steven Crain:
I thought I saw her upstairs.

Young Hugh Crain:
That's not Mom.

Shirley Crain:
[on speaker phone] Steve, do you know what I'm doing right now? I'm elbow deep in our sister's chest cavity pulling out a bag of her internal organs. That's what happens when a body's autopsied, and I have to take it out. You have to get two grown men to a goddamn airport. Get it done! [hangs up]

Theodora Crain:
Well, be sure to let your imagination get the best of you. That's the first step. Imagine the worst thing possible. Assume it's true. Then go from there.

Shirley Crain:
Nell is in the red room.

Max:
I know Grandma's dead. But she still comes to my room at night and she still sits on my bed, even though Mommy and Daddy said she wouldn't. And I told her not to, but she was there again last night. And last night was bad. She looked different. Her fingers were purple, she didn't have teeth, and she did not have hair. I don't want to see her again, especially like that. So, I'm not going to look at her tomorrow, and I don't want to see her in the open castle.

Shirley Crain:
The open casket.

Shirley Crain:
I told you. I told you she was in trouble. I told you to find her. I told you!

Theodora Crain:
What does Mr. Smiley look like?

Kelsey Dunlap:
Just a big smile. Too big. He's always smiling, but he isn't happy.

Theodora Crain:
That's really scary.

Shirley Crain:
What do I say?

Theodora Crain:
You answer the question that's asked. Don't elaborate, don't offer information that's not requested. Just tell them that their feelings are correct, and they're safe. And it's okay to be curious. And sad. Tell them you're sad, too.

Shirley Crain:
And if they ask why?

Theodora Crain:
Tell them you don't know. No one knows and that's okay. Better they ask you than me.

Steven Crain:
Just because someone's a good person, just because you care about them... doesn't mean they won't burn you.

Luke Crain:
[testifying to his AA group] Any addict alone is in bad company.

Steven Crain:
So is this your first rehab, Joey?

Joey:
Uh, it's far from it. Some of us are addicted to treatment centers, huh?

Steven Crain:
It's not Luke's first rodeo either. So what's different this time? Something must be. I mean, you know the definition of insanity--

Luke Crain:
Steve.

Steven Crain:
Doing the same thing over and over--

Joey:
--and expecting different results. Sure, man. Sure. They're all different, though. Every day is different, every craving is different, every meeting is different--

Steven Crain:
Right, I'm not trying to suggest that you're not taking this seriously.

Joey:
Oh, and I'm just--this time around--I'm just speaking for myself--I got more support. And I'm giving more support. So in a sense I guess you could say, it looks like the same thing over and over again, but that's not insanity. Out there on the streets, that's insanity.

Steven Crain:
Of course.

Joey:
So that's what recovery is, you know, it's the same thing over and over again in spite of the results--or in spite of a backslide or in spite of a full-fledged fucking relapse. Doesn't mean you stop just because it gets a little repetitive. One day at a time. When we decide to get clean it's not because we expect it to be fucking exciting, you know?

Dr. Montague:
How can a house, just a collection of bricks, wood, and glass have that much power over people?

Nell Crain:
You've never been there.

Dr. Montague:
Well, that's true. But see, neither have you, not for a long, long time. And I think that if you were to look at it today after all these years, empty in the woods, you'd find it's not a monster. It's barely even a house. It's a carcass.

Theodora Crain:
In movies they always say that they, uh, look like they're sleeping. She doesn't look like she's sleeping. She looks dead. I mean, you, um She looks great. You did a really good job as usual.

Shirley Crain:
Thanks. But she "doesn't look like she's sleeping."

Theodora Crain:
I don't know why people say that.

Shirley Crain:
Most of what people say at a funeral is a wish. "They're in a better place." "They're at peace." "They're smiling down." People just wishing out loud.

Theodora Crain:
How bad was it? I mean, when she got here? How did she look?

Shirley Crain:
Are you really asking?

Theodora Crain:
No. You're right...

Kevin Harris:
[to Hugh] Can I get you anything? We got tons to eat, plenty to drink.

Theodora Crain:
This is Kevin's coping mechanism. He turns into a waiter.

Steven Crain:
[to his father] The only difference between you and the stuff of campfire stories is that you keep getting older.

Luke Crain:
[eulogizing] I was born 90 seconds before Nell, but she was always my big sister.

Mr. Dudley:
So, yeah, it's not my place. But if you find your missus is acting scattered... then, yeah, maybe a little time away would do the trick. From the house, I mean. And a little prayer, too. Most likely.

Hugh Crain:
Well, prayer's not really our thing, but... I take your point.

Mr. Dudley:
Each to their own, I suppose.

Hugh Crain:
[to Steven] Our family is like an unfinished meal to that house, and your brother is walking right back into.. That house is the most dangerous place in the world for all of us, but especially for you.

Steven Crain:
Nell was delusional, depressed, Luke's an addict, Shirley is a control freak, and Theo's basically a clenched fist with hair.

Hugh Crain:
[to Steve about his mom] She used to say she was the kite and I was the line. She was a creature of the clouds and and I was a creature of the earth. And she'd say that without me she'd become untethered and she would float away up into the... And then without her, I would just, you know, crash, just drop right down to the ground.

Theodora Crain:
I just need you to know, that it wasn't Kevin's fault and he didn't do anything...

Shirley Crain:
Don't you fucking dare defend my husband!

Theodora Crain:
All of us, all of us are just always helping you keep up this idea in your head that you're perfect Shirley, and we're just a bunch of fuck-ups fucking up! Perfect Shirley's! Perfect fucking...

Shirley Crain:
[Gives Theodora a hard shove in anger] Get out!

Theodora Crain:
No! You do not just get to shut me out of your life...

[Shirley punches Theodora in her left breast]

Theodora Crain:
Did you just punch me in the boob?

Shirley Crain:
Yeah... Yeah! If you kiss my husband, that's what you get! You get punched in the fucking boob! And get evicted from my fucking house!

Theodora Crain:
[after Theo and Shirley sees Nell's ghost. Theo is extremely emotional] That was her! That was her! That was her! Did you see that, Shirley? Do you fucking believe THAT? You ought to know why I did it. I touched Nell because I had to know. You know what I'm talking about. Don't pretend that you don't. You know what happens when I touch people. A part of you knows, it always has. I had to know and I... I touched her. And I felt nothing. Just nothing. And it spread, it spread everywhere in me, this nothing, until I couldn't feel anything anymore. I was just this dark, empty black hole. And I tried to fill it up, I tried to fill me back up, and I called Trish and she came right away and I felt nothing. And then I tried to mourn at the wake and I felt nothing, and so I drank and I drank, and nothing worked. I couldn't feel anything, Shirley. After I touched her skin, I couldn't feel anything. And then we're in the basement and the lights go out. And I can't see. And I can't feel. And I'm just - I'm just floating in this ocean of nothing, and I wonder if this is it, if this is what death is, just out there in the darkness, just darkness and numbness and alone, and I wondered if that's what she felt and that's what Mom feels, and it's just numb and nothing and alone. What if that's what it is for all of us when the time comes? And then the lights came on and there he was, and I... I didn't see him. I didn't see him. He was the light in the darkness. He was a life preserver in the ocean. I just - I reached for him because I had to feel something. I had to feel anything. And I didn't see him. I didn't - I didn't see him. I didn't see him. I didn't see him! And he stopped me. He stopped me. He took my hands, and he said no, and then I saw him, and then you walked in. God, I'm so glad I did it, though. Because it worked. Oh, God, it worked. I started feeling things again, and I felt - I felt shame, and I felt grief, and I felt scared. I felt so fucking scared that I was gonna lose the only sister that I had left. And I... Honestly, I had to do it, because it felt better than nothing. That thorough fucking shame was so much better than that horrible, empty nothing. I can't - Shirley, please. I am - I am so - I am so, so, so sorry. I'm so sorry. Please, just please.

[Shirley bends down to help Theo up]

Mrs. Dudley:
[admonishing Olivia] If you're worried about your children, you don't let anyone tell you what you're feeling is wrong. You don't let anyone tell you to relax, especially someone who didn't carry those souls in their core - feel them growing. Stand firm between the world out there and these little souls, because the world out there has teeth, and it is hungry, and it is stupid, and it eats and eats mindlessly. It doesn't care that they're innocent. You listen to your gut. Hold the door. Even if it makes them hate you.

Olivia Crain:
When Daddy died, I made it rain rocks.

Young Nell Crain:
[about the red room] It's open! You found the key!

Olivia Crain:
You want to know the secret? We ARE the key.

Olivia Crain:
I'm dreaming, aren't I?

Poppy Hill:
Of course you are. I'm a dream, and so are you, and so are we. Ah, you are a looker, aren't you?

Luke Crain:
She saved me!

Nell Crain:
I feel a little clearer just now. We have.

Theodora Crain:
Nell?

Nell Crain:
All of us have. Wouldn't have changed anything. I need you to know that.

Steven Crain:
Nell.

Nell Crain:
The rest is confetti.

Steven Crain:
Hey.

Nell Crain:
So many times and we didn't know it. All of us.

Shirley Crain:
Nelly?

Nell Crain:
No, not a heart.

Steven Crain:
Nell?

Nell Crain:
A stomach. We have. All of us have.

Steven Crain:
I don't think she can hear us.

Nell Crain:
So many times and we didn't know it.

Steven Crain:
All right, we need to get Luke out of here, we need to get him to a hospital - I don't get it.

Theodora Crain:
All this time we tried to get into this room and now we can't get the fuck out.

Shirley Crain:
I feel like I've been here before.

Nell Crain:
We have. All of us have. So many times and we didn't know it. All of us. I feel a bit clearer now. Everything's been out of order. Time, I mean. I thought for so long that time was like a line, that... that our moments were laid out like dominoes, and that they... fell, one into another and on it went, just days tipping, one into the next, into the next, in a long line between the beginning... and the end. But I was wrong. It's not like that at all. Our moments fall around us like rain. Or... snow. Or confetti. You were right. We have been in this room. So many times and we didn't know. All of us. Mom says... that a house is like a body... and that every house... has eyes. And bones. And skin. And a face. This room is like the heart of the house. No, not a heart, a stomach. It was your dance studio, Theo. It was my toy room. It was a reading room for mom. A game room for Steve. A family room for Shirley. A treehouse. But it was always the Red Room. It put on different faces so that'd we'd be still and quiet. While it digested. I'm like a small creature swallowed whole by a monster. And the monster feels my tiny little movements inside.

Nell Crain:
You have to live.

Luke Crain:
I don't- I don't know how to do this without you.

Nell Crain:
I learned a secret. There's no without. I am not gone. I'm scattered into so many pieces, sprinkled on your life like new snow. There's so much I want to say to you all.

Theodora Crain:
I'm so sorry our last words were in anger.

Nell Crain:
They weren't our last.

Shirley Crain:
I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't... answer the phone.

Nell Crain:
But you did. So many times.

Steven Crain:
I'm sorry if I didn't listen, and I'm sorry...

Nell Crain:
It wouldn't have changed anything. I need you to know that. Forgiveness is warm. Like a tear on a cheek. Think of that and of me when you stand in the rain. I loved you completely. And you loved me the same. That's all. The rest is confetti.

Olivia Crain:
How long has it been since you were here?

Hugh Crain:
Longer than I intended. It was too hard to see you here, this way. But I still had you with me.

Olivia Crain:
Oh, love. That wasn't me, that was just you. What were you doing all this time away?

Hugh Crain:
I was holding a door. Holding a door closed. I had my back against it, and my arms out wide, because I knew there were monsters in the other side and they wanted what was left of our family. And I held it so hard, I didn't have arms left for the kids. The monsters got through anyway.

Olivia Crain:
That's what monsters do.

Olivia Crain:
We're all safe now. This is our forever house. It always was. Nothing bad will ever touch them ever again.

Hugh Crain:
Nothing good will, either.

Theodora Crain:
I don't feel anything.

Trish Park:
That's okay, none taken.

Theodora Crain:
No, I don't I don't feel anything else.

Trish Park:
Because you're normal. What were you feeling before?

Theodora Crain:
I was feeling fear. And... And guilt.

Trish Park:
Fear and guilt are sisters.

Steven Crain:
I've lived with ghosts since I was a kid. Since before I knew they were even there. Ghosts are guilt, ghosts are secrets, ghosts are regrets and failings. But most times most times a ghost is a wish. Like a marriage is a wish. A marriage can be like a house and a marriage can be haunted, and I let that happen to us. And I'm so sorry, Leigh.

Steven Crain:
Fear. Fear is the relinquishment of logic, the willing relinquishing of reasonable patterns. But so, it seems, is love. Love is the relinquishment of logic. The willing relinquishing of reasonable patterns. We yield to it or we fight it but we cannot meet it halfway. Without it, we cannot continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality. Hill House, not sane, stands against its hills holding darkness within. It has stood for a hundred years and might stand a hundred more. Within, walls continue upright, bricks meet neatly, floors are firm and doors are sensibly shut. Silence lay steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House and those who walk there walk together.