Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Melinda May:
Wheels up in five.

Phil Coulson:
[Regarding "Tahiti"] It's a magical place.

Grant Ward:
Skye, the girl is not qualified to be a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent.

Phil Coulson:
That's why I invited her on as a consultant. S.H.I.E.L.D. does it all the time. Technically Stark is a consultant.

Skye:
Sweet ride.

Phil Coulson:
I earned a little good will from Director Fury when I got hit right before the battle of New York.

Skye:
You took a bullet?

Phil Coulson:
Ish.

Skye:
I don't even know where we are going.

Phil Coulson:
Peru. That's where the 0-8-4 was reported.

Skye:
And an 0-8-4 is?

Phil Coulson:
Object of unknown origin, kind of like you. Team goes in determines if it's useful or poses a threat. Last one turned out to be pretty interesting.

Skye:
What was the last one?

Phil Coulson:
A hammer.

Grant Ward:
Where's your side arm?

Melinda May:
If I need a gun, I'll take one.

Grant Ward:
Right, I forgot I was working with the cavalry.

Melinda May:
Don't ever call me that.

Grant Ward:
[after they get attacked by a bunch of commandos] Should have taken more guns.

Phil Coulson:
We still need to iron out the kinks, but Ward you can speak 6 languages, Simmons you have 2 PHD's in fields I cannot pronounce, and Fitz you ARE a rocket scientist, so work it out. [Leaves]

Skye:
[shouts after him] I'm... I'm good at stuff too!

Phil Coulson:
[about Skye] Imagine what she'll do with our resources.

Grant Ward:
I am. That's exactly what I'm imagining during this frown. You brought me on for risk assessment. She's a risk.

Phil Coulson:
I'm calling this. But your frown will be on record.

Skye:
I have a small question, because I've been feeling like the tag-along hayseed rookie, but now I'm getting the sense that Ward doesn't know which one's Simmons and which one's Fitz, and they've seen even less gunfire than me and, I'm no rocket scientist but... is this your first mission together?

Jemma Simmons:
No, of course not, it's our second.

Skye:
I was your first? That's sweet.

Skye:
Usually one person doesn't solve the solution, but 100 people with 1% of the solution? That will get it done. I think that's beautiful, pieces solving a puzzle.

Grant Ward:
You and I see the world differently.

Camilla Reyes:
Oh, Phil, you're not even aware. Your re-newed idealism, your collectables, your air-borne man-cave; surrounding yourself with young, attractive agents - you're having a mid-life crisis.

Phil Coulson:
[Mostly to himself] More of an after-life thing really.

Camilla Reyes:
And I'm not even going to mention the red Corvette.

Phil Coulson:
Her name is Lola.

Camilla Reyes:
[laughs] Of course it is.

Nick Fury:
Really? Really, Coulson? SIX DAYS? It only took you six days to take a completely renovated piece of state-of-the-art machinery and turn it into scrap?

Phil Coulson:
My team acted with my authority.

Nick Fury:
Authority! Don't talk to me about authority. Do you know how much this plane cost? It got a bar!

[Looks at it sadly]

Nick Fury:
A really nice one. Talking to me about authority. You know, I have the authority to downgrade your ass to a Winnebago!

Phil Coulson:
I'm aware of that, sir.

Nick Fury:
Well, I want it fixed. Just like you found it. So don't have Fitz-Simmons going making modifications, like a, a damn fish tank.

Phil Coulson:
Yes, sir.

[after Fury leaves]

Phil Coulson:
Yeah, we're going to have to kill the fish tank.

Leo Fitz:
Are you mental? I did explain what I meant using the Queen's bloody English!

Grant Ward:
I use normal English. Words like "duck" and "run" and "might blow us to pieces."

Leo Fitz:
Congratulations, Agent Ward, you managed to string three words together in a sentence.

Skye:
[Fitz-Simmons bring down a cooler full of beers] How many of those have you guys had?

Leo Fitz:
Oh, Skye. It's important, when in the field, to unwind from time to time.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, especially after a hard day of everyone almost dying.

Phil Coulson:
Do you need anything before I go check on the device fueled by evil that's sitting in our cargo hold? [May is silent] This was fun.

Skye:
[to S.H.I.E.L.D. ground crew about her van] Hey, no joy rides, okay? That's my house.

Leo Fitz:
[Showing Skye around the plane] Officially, it's an airborne mobile command station. But we call it the bus. We find it best to use shorthand when in the field. But everything has to be just so, you know, because of the danger.

Skye:
Yeah, I've been up here before, but I didn't see much because of the *bag* that Agent Ward put over my head.

Jemma Simmons:
Yes, so sorry about that.

Grant Ward:
This area has lots of rebel uprisings.

Skye:
Yeah, people are fighting back against the government's mining policies. It's pretty kick ass.

Grant Ward:
[Sarcastic] Yeah, it's kick ass, all the violence.

Leo Fitz:
[Driving away from rebels] Slow down!

Skye:
You're joking, right?

Leo Fitz:
Ward, listen! We have to be careful.

[about the 0-8-4]

Leo Fitz:
There's a binding energy structure that could overheat...

Jemma Simmons:
I could roll down a window!

[Starts to do this, hear gunfire]

Skye:
Do NOT roll down a window!

Leo Fitz:
[Tied up] This is my fault. Should have learned kung fu.

Jemma Simmons:
Oh, yeah, but I shouldn't have pushed you into the field in the first place. You weren't ready.

Grant Ward:
It was my job to makea proper threat assessment.

Leo Fitz:
[to Simmons] Uh, we. *We* weren't ready.

Skye:
This wouldn't have happened if Agent May wasn't on the stick. She would have busted out some of her ninja know how.

Leo Fitz:
Agent May? No. No, no. She transferred from administration.

Skye:
Well, I've seen her destroy a guy, so... [They all look at Ward]

Grant Ward:
You've heard of the cavalry?

Jemma Simmons:
Yeah.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah. Everyone at the academy talks about stor - [Sudden realization]

Jemma Simmons, Leo Fitz:
She's the cavalry?

Melinda May:
[Wakes up] I told you never to call me that.

Skye:
Okay, we're sure, right? Everyone's sure?

Jemma Simmons:
We're all on board.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, let's do this fast.

Grant Ward:
No turning back. No freezing up.

Leo Fitz:
Because if we do, then...

Grant Ward:
All of us die.

Jemma Simmons:
We know.

Skye:
Yeah.

Leo Fitz:
All right.

Melinda May:
[Revs engine] You guys talk a lot.

Skye:
What happened with Reyes, anyway?

Phil Coulson:
She's being held at a S.H.I.E.L.D. detainment facility. I expect the Peruvian government will negotiate for her release. She probably won't spend much time in jail.

Skye:
No, I mean what happened with you and Reyes? You guys totally did it back in the day, right?

Phil Coulson:
[Smiles slightly] That's classified.

Grant Ward:
Looks like Skye might end up as more than just a consultant, despite our reservations. She could turn into a solid asset... with some serious work.

Melinda May:
Well, if she wants to be a field agent, she'll need a supervising officer someone disciplined, someone good. [Smiles at Ward]

Grant Ward:
All right. I'll do it. Just to clarify, you were, uh, talking about me, right? [May smiles]

Leo Fitz:
This is all my fault. I should have learned Kung-Fu.

Jemma Simmons:
[having lost the opportunity to return to Earth] You were right. There's no hope on this planet.

Will Daniels:
That's what I used to think. Then you showed up.

Jemma Simmons:
Everyone always said we could read each others minds, Fitz. So, I really need you to read mine right now. I'm alive, but I'm terribly alone and afraid. So I really need you to come and get me, okay? I know you won't give up, so I won't either.

Jemma Simmons:
Ah. The bodies just disintegrate. I saw references to this weapon in HYDRA's lab. Yeah, sent from their demolitions expert, uh, Toshiro...

Bobbi Morse:
Toshiro Mori. I've crossed paths with him before. He has a lab in Okinawa.

Phil Coulson:
Good. Then that's where you're going. We need to find the location of the next attack and stop it before it happens.

Senator Christian Ward:
S.H.I.E.L.D. attacked the United Nations for God's sake, under your watch.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
The people who attacked us may not have been S.H.I.E.L.D.

Senator Christian Ward:
It's time I step in.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
And do what?

Senator Christian Ward:
Control the situation. Now with S.H.I.E.L.D.'s back in the spotlight, the press is gonna take this and run with it.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
You're worried they're gonna find out about your brother, aren't you?

Senator Christian Ward:
What worries me is that you even know about him.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
I don't play politics, senator. I haven't said one word about your brother to anyone, and I don't intend to.

Senator Christian Ward:
The truth is, general, you can't assure me of anything. It's time I do what I should have done months ago - put S.H.I.E.L.D. in the ground for good.

Skye:
Guess being a douche-bag runs in the family.

Phil Coulson:
Are you surprised?

Skye:
Ward's brother never cared about S.H.I.E.L.D. before.

Phil Coulson:
Not openly.

Skye:
Yeah, but Hunter said that Talbot was working with a senator who had deep pockets. You think it's him?

Phil Coulson:
I do.

Lance Hunter:
Try being married to somebody who remembers every single little detail. It's not that charming. You think I'm being petty, don't you? Well, I'm not. I told have a problem Bob kissing that guy.

Melinda May:
Good. Because you have a hickey on your neck for a week after our mission in Miami.

Lance Hunter:
Excuse me doing my job thoroughly... and with style.

Lance Hunter:
This poor sap's buying every word she says.

Melinda May:
That's not what we want.

Lance Hunter:
I just feel sorry for the guy. Making targets feel special - that's her thing. You know when I gave her my Nan's pearl ear rings, she was like...

Melinda May:
You know I don't like you, right?

Senator Christian Ward:
What do you want?

Phil Coulson:
An opportunity to clear the air. The attack on the U.N. wasn't S.H.I.E.L.D., it was Hydra - specifically a man named Daniel Whitehall.

Senator Christian Ward:
You're not hear to clear the air. You need something from me. And all this swaggering simply tells me you have nothing to offer in return. What do you want me to do? Go on record defending S.H.I.E.L.D., condemning HYDRA? The American people are looking for a simple enemy, Mr. Coulson. It's what makes them feel safe.

Phil Coulson:
And how do you think they'd feel if they knew your brother was HYDRA? That an awfully complicated ideal to grasp, especially in an election year.

Senator Christian Ward:
Are you threatening me, Mr. Coulson?

Phil Coulson:
No. I'm telling you I have your brother in my basement.

Senator Christian Ward:
Is he all right? Is Grant hurt? Did you have to do anything...?

Phil Coulson:
No. We believe there are other ways to get information from people. I'm surprised your concerned, honestly.

Senator Christian Ward:
You don't have a brother, do you?

Phil Coulson:
No. Always wanted one, though. As an only child, you tend to idealize that relationship. Family has to take care of each other, right? Then again, I've heard stories say otherwise.

Senator Christian Ward:
What did Grant tell you?

Phil Coulson:
Plenty. I know what you did. How you forced him to torture your youngest brother. I know what happened at the well.

Senator Christian Ward:
So, it's a well now? You may think you know Grant Ward, Mr. Coulson, but trust me - underneath every lie he tells is just another lie.

Senator Christian Ward:
When were kids, our parents were always gone - some state function or another. We'd spend all day at the creek hunting salamanders and crayfish. But I could never leave Grant alone with Thomas. I found Grant down there once, standing over him with a screwdriver. Thomas was on the ground, just screaming. And I saw something... something else behind his eyes. Something I'm sure you've seen before, as well. A second later, it was gone. And he was just my little brother again. He told our parents I forced him to do it. I've spent too much of my life trying to unravel his lies.

Phil Coulson:
So have I.

Senator Christian Ward:
And yet, he keeps telling them. He always finds someone to believe him.

Grant Ward:
Everything I told Skye was true. You know that. I haven't given you one bad piece of Intel. Is that worth nothing?

Phil Coulson:
You will never see Skye, again.

Grant Ward:
I thought we were rebuilding trust, Coulson. I can help you. I'm still part of your team.

Phil Coulson:
My team? You th... You are not part nor will you never be on my team. You dropped Fitz-Simmons out of a plane. You murdered Victoria Hand and Eric Koenig. You betrayed every one of us, you deluded son of a b*tch. The only reason you are alive is because of you were of use. And the only reason you're being transferred is because of your brother is of more use.

Grant Ward:
Was this his idea or yours to put me on trial? Hmm? It's a good story - a man brave enough to have his own brother executed for his crimes. Oh, Christian will milk that for all its worth. And the trial should wrap up before the midterms.

Phil Coulson:
Your brother saw the same angles. Maybe you two are more alike than you think.

Bobbi Morse:
You're leaving?

Lance Hunter:
S.H.I.E.L.D.'s always been your thing. I won't stand in the way of that.

Bobbi Morse:
S.H.I.E.L.D.'s not S.H.I.E.L.D. anymore. I'm still trying to figure out where I fit in, too. Just don't die out there, all right? But if you want to stay... stay.

Marcus Scarlotti:
Shame. I prefer to take my time.

[Scarlotti plants a splinter bomb in Agent Walters]

Agent Noelle Walters:
HYDRA will never defeat...

[Agent Walters disintegrates]

Marcus Scarlotti:
You were saying?

Senator Christian Ward:
Dignatares, ladies and gentlemen, less then 48 hours ago, brave men and women lost their lives at this very spot where I'm standing now, and I think we owe it to them to discuss something all often elusive - the truth. Sometimes we want something simpler than they actually are, but... the tough reality is, we are complex creatures. And I've come to understand something that the world must, as well. There is a difference between S.H.I.E.L.D. and HYDRA. One was an organization built on protection, and the other - world domination. And just as good and evil existed side-by-side within S.H.I.E.L.D., the same was true in my own home. At first, I was ashamed to share this truth with the world, but my younger brother, Grand Ward, was a member of HYDRA. He was a traitor. He was a traitor to his friends, his family, and his nation. When evil sits to ones own heart, that is when the surest hand must cut it out. I give my word. I will personally make sure my brother is punished for his crimes. But as is so often true, the darkness lingers longer than the light. And while S.H.I.E.L.D. is gone, HYDRA is a problem that world must still face. Otherwise, that darkness will grow and spread and cast a shadow over us all.

Grant Ward:
I know what I am. But my brother? He's worse.

Calvin Zabo:
[after Raina asks him for the Obelisk] It's the only thing that will make her understand... understand me. I won't turn it over. I'm sorry.

Raina:
Daniel Whitehall will cut me to pieces.

Calvin Zabo:
[Unmoved by this] Yes. He will. I suggest you go back to his office and beg to him. Maybe he's turned soft in his old age.

Raina:
[Moves to the door] I really wanted to bring you Skye.

Calvin Zabo:
That's not her name.

Calvin Zabo:
I hear you've been looking for this.

[Shows him the Obelisk]

Daniel Whitehall:
The Obelisk!

Calvin Zabo:
In its native language it's called the Deviner. One of many little details I know about this thing.

Daniel Whitehall:
Can you tell me how to use it?

Calvin Zabo:
Better yet, I'll teach you how to survive it.

Daniel Whitehall:
Now why would you do that?

Calvin Zabo:
We share a common enemy: a guy named Phil Coulson. I thought maybe together you and I could kill him, along with, you know, everyone else.

Phil Coulson:
I don't like being threatened.

Raina:
This isn't a threat. It's a gesture of goodwill. I would like nothing more than to delete that photo.

Phil Coulson:
And in return, what do you want?

Raina:
From you? Nothing. But I will need to take Skye with me.

Phil Coulson:
Excuse me? What in the hell is this really about? And why, also in the hell, do you think I would ever let that happen?

Raina:
To prevent every HYDRA employee from receiving an automated e-mail with that photo. [Hits a button on her phone] You have two minutes, after which, there's nothing I can do.

Jemma Simmons:
What sort of hell cow produces carmine milk?

Kenneth Turgeon:
I don't know. File just says "Bessie".

Leo Fitz:
Why are you still staring at me?

Jemma Simmons:
Because you just admitted that I'm not real.

Leo Fitz:
Oh, please. I'm not gonna have this conversation with myself again.

Antoine Triplett:
[listening to Bobbi and Hunter bicker] What's the story there?

Melinda May:
Did Hunter ever tell you stories about his she-devil ex-wife?

Antoine Triplett:
All the time.

[May nods at Bobbi]

Antoine Triplett:
Damn.

Skye:
Hold on, are you saying that I'm an alien?

Phil Coulson:
It's a theory.

Skye:
No, a theory is what scientists use to prove things in nature, this is you telling me that I might be an alien! That's *not* something you just say like it's no big deal!

Phil Coulson:
I was trying not to rattle you.

Skye:
Guess what? Epic fail.

Bartender:
Eight went down... dead.

Sunil Bakshi:
And the others?

Bartender:
Some sick, everyone else scared, but very much alive.

Sunil Bakshi:
How disappointing. Return immediately to give your report personally. Dr. Whitehall will not be pleased to hear that we, again, have failed.

Skye:
What about the writings you've been giving me? Why don't you tell me your source, and I'll follow up?

Phil Coulson:
I'm afraid that's classified.

Lance Hunter:
Well, you're the boss man. Maybe you could de-classify it.

Phil Coulson:
I could. I won't

Raina:
I'm in trouble.

Skye's Father:
And here I thought you were bringing me good news.

Raina:
I need the Obelisk back... [Gets a harsh look]... Temporarily, just until I can make other arrangements.

Skye's Father:
And what about ours? After all these years, I thought you'd show more respect.

Raina:
[Desperate] Please, I beg you...

Skye's Father:
[Harsh] Don't beg. It reminds me of what you were when I found you. Hungry, in the streets, with just those fairy tales your grandmother told you.

Raina:
You said you'd make them come true.

Skye's Father:
You said you'd bring me my girl.

Raina:
And I did.

Skye's Father:
You brought me a picture and a promise. I still only have the picture.

Lance Hunter:
[Looks at the painting they took from Miami] I was a fat baby.

Skye:
You know this is, like, a religious painting, right?

Lance Hunter:
Yeah, well, when aliens started scribbling on the back of it, it kind of voided god's warranty, as far as I'm concerned.

Skye:
Tell me what you know about this. [Shows him a picture of the alien writing]

Grant Ward:
I first saw that when we were in Belarus... me and you... and later on, when Garrett started etching that in the glass.

Skye:
Garrett carved this stuff himself? Did he say what it was?

Grant Ward:
No, but he wasn't making a lot of sense after he was injected with the GH-formula. [Suddenly concerned] These writings they're not yours, are they? [Gets a look] Good. That's good, 'cause once Garrett started, he couldn't stop. The writing was anywhere he could carve it - on the walls, on the floor.

Skye:
[Thinks of Coulson speaks under her breathe] On his desk.

Grant Ward:
To be honest, I was almost relieved when S. H. I. E. L. D. put him down. The Garrett I knew was long gone once the writing started. And whatever took his place, I don't think it was meant to survive.

Phil Coulson:
First night I saw Garrett's writings... it just triggered something in me.

Skye:
What do you think caused it?

Phil Coulson:
The GH-formula, most likely. Garrett and I were both injected - not a coincidence.

Skye:
Yeah, but so was I, and I haven't written anything like that.

Phil Coulson:
Which is either very good, or... a whole different kind of scary, which is why we had to monitor you.

Skye:
Whoa. Wait. *Monitor*? That is a very specific word.

Phil Coulson:
We didn't tell you about this because we wanted to passively observe see if the writing would trigger something in you.

Skye:
So, what you guys put, like, tiny hidden cameras in my bunk?

Phil Coulson:
Not in your bunk - But I think you're focusing on the wrong details here.

Skye:
I didn't react the same way.

Phil Coulson:
Right. I believe Garrett and I had a negative reaction to the alien DNA in our system. Maybe you didn't... because it was already there.

Lance Hunter:
[Watching Coulson and Raina] The tiny girl in the flower dress? That's who everyone's making such a fuss about?

Raina:
It's good to see you, Agent Coulson.

Phil Coulson:
Raina.

Raina:
I was worried you weren't going to accept my invitation, but perhaps I wasn't the only one looking forward to our next meeting.

Lance Hunter:
Is she *hitting* on him?

Melinda May:
Yep. That's what she does.

Phil Coulson:
Tell me where to find the Obelisk.

Raina:
I'm afraid it's out of my hands.

Phil Coulson:
That really doesn't work for me. I've seen what that thing can do. It's too dangerous to be out in the real world.

Raina:
You've only seen the beginning. Just because something's powerful doesn't make it dangerous.

Phil Coulson:
In this case, it's more the death and destruction.

Raina:
You must believe me, Agent Coulson we want the same thing.

Phil Coulson:
Unless it's an end to this conversation, I'm pretty sure we don't.

Jemma Simmons:
I don't mean to sound ungrateful, because I am truly grateful, but who are you?

Bobbi Morse:
Bobbi Morse. Coulson sent me in to infiltrate HYDRA and keep an eye on you.

Jemma Simmons:
Well, you did a spot-on job, really. You were quite intimidating.

Bobbi Morse:
Sorry about that. I had to assess other security issues that were in play.

Jemma Simmons:
Yeah, like every HYDRA agent receiving an e-mail blowing my cover?

Bobbi Morse:
Yeah, that was a curve ball.

Phil Coulson:
[after searching for Skye's father] You're having one hell of a day, huh? [Skye starts crying]

Phil Coulson:
[Gives her a hug] It's okay. It's okay.

Lance Hunter:
So, is this a group-hug-type situation?

Phil Coulson:
You find anything?

Lance Hunter:
The place has been cleared out Must have left in a hurry. Agent May's checking the back room.

Skye:
[Sniffs] Have you been drinking?

Lance Hunter:
I was working. Had to maintain my cover.

Skye:
Your cover as what, Ron Burgundy?

Phil Coulson:
This just went from bad to really, really bad.

Melinda May:
So, you trust Spud?

Lance Hunter:
Trust is a strong word, for a psychopath. He's a murderous thief who I once saw bite a man's nose clean off. But, he'll get us through the door.

Phil Coulson:
Daisy, I need you to monitor all law-enforcement activity near Lincoln's last known location.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
How 'bout we take a team and go look for him ourselves?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
No. The A.T.C.U.'s on a witch hunt for powered people.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
I'm not afraid of them.

Phil Coulson:
No, but they're terrified of you. Which makes them dangerous. Until we know where he is, you're not going out there.

Rosalind Price:
[about Lincoln] He's extremely dangerous...

Phil Coulson:
He wouldn't be, in our custody.

Rosalind Price:
We're not going to harvest him for parts, if that's what you're worried about. We're not Hydra.

Phil Coulson:
You say that now. What's so important about him?

Rosalind Price:
Are you serious? He could bring down a plane. Feels like a man worth talking to.

Phil Coulson:
I have another theory: the President makes a big speech about this new organization he's put into place. I imagine that puts a lot of pressure onto you. Pressure to show results.

Rosalind Price:
You're not wrong. And that's why I'm taking him in.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
You are not cursed. You are not some horrible thing. I know, because you taught me that I wasn't. You convinced me that I had a purpose. That maybe my life wasn't over, but just getting somewhere. Please let me do the same for you.

Lincoln Campbell:
You're wasting your time caring about me.

Honest Eddie:
[Coulson is looking at cars] Can I let you in on a little secret? I've got a genuine, honest Abe, God-given superpower. You want to know what it is?

Phil Coulson:
I'm afraid to guess.

Honest Eddie:
I can look at any man and tell him exactly what kind of car he should be driving.

Phil Coulson:
Maybe I'll just look around.

Honest Eddie:
Y-you know, I look at you, and I see a man who's played it safe his whole life, but lately feels like he's stuck in a rut. Life's lost its thrill. The kids are monsters. The wife's taken to muumuus. And now you're thinking, "it's time to let the tiger loose."

Phil Coulson:
[after stealing a jeep] Sorry, Eddie. Tiger's been loose for awhile.

Phil Coulson:
I'm not going down without a fight. We're gonna find Skye and we're gonna take back S.H.I.E.L.D., and we're gonna need more than Honest Eddie's Jeep to do it.

Lance Hunter:
You want to take their Quinjet - the two of us, while we're trapped in here, surrounded. Brilliant.

Phil Coulson:
I have reinforcements on the way. We just have to hold down the fort until they get here.

Lance Hunter:
Yeah, well, I have reinforcements of my own.

Phil Coulson:
Icers only.

Lance Hunter:
Oh, you can't be serious.

Phil Coulson:
Those are S.H.I.E.L.D. agents out there. We're not gonna hurt them.

Lance Hunter:
I somehow doubt they feel the same about us.

Phil Coulson:
It won't come to that. It may not look like it, but this place was built to withstand a Hulk-size force. On the other hand, let's just hope they didn't bring a...

[a battering ram hits the safe house]

Lance Hunter:
...battering ram, 'cause then we've only got about an hour.

Lance Hunter:
Where are the reinforcements?

Melinda May:
I don't know. Stuck in traffic?

Lance Hunter:
Are they traveling by clown car?

Phil Coulson:
[Referring to Gonzalez] Maybe he's got a point. I was dead, after all. I shouldn't even be here.

Lance Hunter:
We all have our bad days.

Lance Hunter:
Maybe we should forget all this, head down to Mexico. We can lay low, enjoy the quiet life.

Phil Coulson:
That's not an option. The problem is... there are no good options.

Lance Hunter:
Well, maybe it's time for the bad ones.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I hate to see you leave, Turbo.

Leo Fitz:
Only my friend, Mack, calls me that.

Lance Hunter:
This would have been a piece of cake if you'd let us use these big boy guns. Now we have to get close enough to get shot by *their* big boy guns.

Phil Coulson:
By the time they recognize us it'll be too late.

Lance Hunter:
Then there's the small matter of who's gonna fly that thing. Do you even know how?

Phil Coulson:
I've watched May fly. I know a little.

Lance Hunter:
How little?

Phil Coulson:
I can get us off the ground.

Lance Hunter:
You do know there's more to it than that like getting us back *on* the ground... for example...

Lance Hunter:
[He and Coulson are watching Mike Peterson aka Deathlok at the jet's controls] At some point, you might have mentioned that backup was a lethal cyborg.

Phil Coulson:
Truthfully, I just wanted to see the look on your face when he showed up. Priceless.

Lance Hunter:
Glad I amuse you.

Deathlok:
You know I can hear you up here.

Robert Gonzales:
Seven agents down, Calderon barely hanging on, and you want to defend that thing?

Bobbi Morse:
What happened wasn't her fault. I was there. Calderon fired at her.

Robert Gonzales:
She was armed and hostile.

Bobbi Morse:
She was scared and defending herself.

Robert Gonzales:
I don't care if she was chasing butterflies. We can't wear kid gloves around something with powers of that magnitude.

Robert Gonzales:
Leo Fitz, Jemma Simmons, the ones that got away. I had my eye on you two when you were at the academy. I wanted to recruit you, but Coulson beat me to it. I heard he actually bribed Weaver with cupcakes. Robert Gonzales.

Jemma Simmons:
We know who you are, and we are quite aware of your commendable reputation. Under different circumstances, we might even be flattered... Which is why this is so hard to comprehend.

Robert Gonzales:
Under different circumstances, we would have preferred to be invited guests, but that... [Points to the toolbox] Forced our hand. We had to take it out of play.

Jemma Simmons:
What's inside that's so important?

Bobbi Morse:
All we know is that Coulson and Fury both believed it was valuable enough or dangerous enough to protect with extreme measures.

Leo Fitz:
Maybe it was their favorite recipes.

Skye:
Can you warm up food with your powers? Because that would be awesome.

Lincoln Campbell:
I have never tried; but I did warm up a small pool once.

Skye:
Any five-year-old can warm up a pool.

Lincoln Campbell:
magine a thousand years of evolution taking place instantaneously. That's what happened to you after the mist. These treatments, we're helping your body adjust properly to the change. Transitioning you quickly and painlessly; I hope. We usually like to start the process right after the mist but...

Skye:
How long?

Skye:
How long? [Lincoln gives her a look] How long, when can I go?

Lincoln Campbell:
You got places to be, people to see?

Skye:
I'm worried about my friends. I think they're in danger.

Lincoln Campbell:
You're the one that's in danger Skye, remember? You're being hunted.

Skye:
Did you find Raina's body yet?

Phil Coulson:
There's a lot of rubble to dig through, but not yet. Whatever gas came out of that obelisk hit you, too. That's why we're being extra cautious. It's hard to make sense of all of this.

Skye:
What? No, it - No, it isn't. We lost. We failed.

Phil Coulson:
Skye, don't say that.

Skye:
It wasn't because of Hydra. It was because of me.

Phil Coulson:
Don't blame yourself.

Skye:
If I didn't go down there, you could have blown the place!

Phil Coulson:
That was one battle. This is a war.

Skye:
And Ward and my father - the rotten core the center of everything!

Phil Coulson:
We did not fail! Trip prevented a disaster, and Whitehall's dead. We cut off the head. And while Hydra scrambles for a new one, I will crush them! I'm gonna make someone pay - whoever the hell it is.

Bobbi Morse:
Anyway... I've been in quarantine before, and I know it can drive you absolutely nuts.

Skye:
Thanks. I was beginning to feel like a leper.

Bobbi Morse:
Are you kidding? You managed to be taken hostage by three known murderers, you gunned Ward down, then were blasted by an alien chemical weapon and walked out unscathed. Leper? I think you're a rock star.

Phil Coulson:
I shouldn't have to ask any of you to save one of our own.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
You never ask! You just give your orders, no matter cracked out they are!

Melinda May:
Mack, you'd do well to remember your rank right now.

Lance Hunter:
Really? Rank at a time like this - why don't you shove your rank up your...

Bobbi Morse:
Not helping, Hunter.

Skye:
Guys, stop.

Lance Hunter:
No, it's cathartic. Do you have any thoughts of your own on it, or do you just parrot his?

Melinda May:
Coulson's trying to stop Hydra.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
We didn't stop anything! We unleashed something on the planet!

Skye:
Please.

Leo Fitz:
No one knows what happened yet.

Melinda May:
It could have been a lot worse.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
And Skye barely made it out alive!

Melinda May:
Thanks to Trip - he sacrificed his life, Mack!

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
No! He traded his life for hers! And then he was shattered into a thousand pieces!

Phil Coulson:
That's enough! If Trip was here. He wouldn't be arguing, he wouldn't be bitching. He would be gearing up to do what needs to be done. Yes, we're dealing with forces we don't understand, but Hydra I *do* understand. I want everyone ready when the sun comes up - end of discussion.

Melinda May:
"You'll never take us alive"? Really? That's a little over the top, don't you think?

Phil Coulson:
I only had a day to come up with this whole thing. Besides, if I let you write the script, no one would say anything.

Raina:
After all that time, I didn't quite get the answers I was searching for.

Calvin Zabo:
I'm sorry you didn't find your way to the temple. You didn't get to evolve.

Raina:
Oh, I evolved.

[grabs him]

Raina:
What the hell have I become?

Calvin Zabo:
Raina. Let's not lose our heads.

Raina:
What happened to me?

Calvin Zabo:
Metamorphosis by the look of it.

Raina:
I was supposed to become something divine, something transcendent. My grandmother said I'd be an angel, not some gnarled freak of nature covered in thorns.

Calvin Zabo:
You always did like flowers.

Raina:
They hurt, and it's all your fault.

Lance Hunter:
[in American accent] Your presence is most welcome.

Bobbi Morse:
Drop the accent. It makes you sound like a douche bag.

Lance Hunter:
[in normal voice] Now you know what it feels like for me to live in this country.

Skye:
[after Fitz lied on her behalf] What did you just do?

Leo Fitz:
I switched your blood results with your old samples. Give me your hand.

Skye:
The new samples are different?

Leo Fitz:
Drastically. But until everyone around here calms down, I don't think we should tell anybody, what with the way Simmons is acting. For now, we should just keep it between us. Keep you safe until we figure it out, okay? [Skye starts crying and hugs Fitz] It's okay.

Skye:
This is all my fault.

Leo Fitz:
No.

Skye:
I could have stopped her. I let this happen, and I'm so sorry.

Leo Fitz:
No, it's okay.

Skye:
It's all my fault... There is something very wrong with me.

Leo Fitz:
No, you're just different now. You're just different now, and there's nothing wrong with that.

Phil Coulson:
Nice of you to pick me up.

Rosalind Price:
Yes. On the corner, since won't tell me where your base is.

Phil Coulson:
You know I run a spy organization, right?

Gideon Malick:
You've made some mistakes in your game play. Using von Strucker's son as a pawn when he shouldn't even be on the board yet.

Grant Ward:
You see, that's just typical of guys in your generation. You don't even know the game I'm playing. Von Strucker is more than just a pawn.

Gideon Malick:
And now he's a liability. He knows too much. Just tell me if I'm wrong. You burned that asset. S.H.I.E.L.D. is looking for him, which means so are you. And I know where you can find him.

Grant Ward:
And you'll just tell me that? Why?

Gideon Malick:
Sometimes you sacrifice a player to save the game. You just remember, when I come calling that I chose a side.

Melinda May:
We find the Strucker kid, he'll lead us back to Ward.

Bobbi Morse:
You got a how?

Melinda May:
S.H.I.E.L.D's been monitoring several Hydra bank accounts for a while now, one just woke up. Cayman Islands.

Bobbi Morse:
Strucker needed funds, makes sense. So what's the op?

Melinda May:
How's your Mandarin?

Bobbi Morse:
[In Mandarin] You tell me. [Back to English] If we head down there, maybe we'll pick up his trail. He's on the run from Ward. From us. Almost makes me feel sorry for the kid.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
Lash was tracking us. He knew where our truck was. He needed inside info for that.

Phil Coulson:
You think he's got access to ATCU information?

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
No, I think he's in the ATCU. We know that he can transform himself into a regular size guy and back. What if he's hiding out as one of them?

Phil Coulson:
That's a scary thought.

Leo Fitz:
What, you don't think I should help Simmons rescue Will?

Lance Hunter:
Do you think you should? He's the competition. If your girlfriend's ex wants to visit from Phoenix, you do not buy him a plane ticket.

Leo Fitz:
That's really specific. Anyway, this guy kept Simmons alive. I owe him. He deserves my help.

Lance Hunter:
Lash is an Inhuman. Inhumans have markers in their DNA. If we test Banks' blood for markers, we'll know if he's Inhuman or not.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
...That's actually kind of smart.

Lance Hunter:
Thank you.

Ian Quinn:
This is our strategy consultant, John Garrett.

General Jacobs:
I want full disclosure right now, or our boys will come in and shut you down. Why do I hear gunfire?

John Garrett:
You hear the dying breath of an old world, general. And a new world is coming. I've tasted it on my tongue.

General Jacobs:
This is your strategy consultant?

Ian Quinn:
He's... part-time.

John Garrett:
New strategy - you shut your mouth and give us everything we want.

General Jacobs:
You threaten a United States general, and there are consequences.

John Garrett:
Oh, you feel powerful now, don't you? But you're all just slaves who will serve our future.

General Jacobs:
Listen, you crazy son of a b*tch...

Ian Quinn:
Gentlemen, perhaps a small demonstration will...

John Garrett:
Yes. Oh, yes. A demonstration.

[punches in General Jacob's stomach]

John Garrett:
I've seen the future. I've glimpsed it through the eyes of every creature - dead, living, and yet to be. This is the beginning.

Grant Ward:
The beginning of what, John?

John Garrett:
The end.

Phil Coulson:
We only get one shot at this, so let's go over the plan one more time to make sure we're clear on exactly what we're doing, okay? Trip and I will crest the ridge, use a noisemaker to grab a three-wheel, maybe something with more fireworks, and open a window for you two. You crawl in, grab the dealer, force his hand. He'll get us our ace in the hole, and then Bob's your uncle.

Skye:
Roger that.

Antoine Triplett:
Makes it sound easy.

Melinda May:
Coulson, it's a solid plan you've mapped out, but it hinges on a gamble - a big one.

Phil Coulson:
And back up isn't coming. It'll be just the four of us. We'll be outmanned and outgunned. But Fury always said... a man can accomplish anything when he realizes he's a part of something bigger. A team of people who share that conviction can change the world. So, what do you say? You ready to change the world?

Melinda May:
No. I'm ready to kick some ass.

Phil Coulson:
That works, too.

Phil Coulson:
You bring a noisemaker?

Antoine Triplett:
Sir, I bring the noise and the funk wherever I go.

John Garrett:
You don't need to be set to default. You haven't left me alone all day.

Mike Peterson:
I was told never to leave your side, sir.

John Garrett:
I love you, too.

Phil Coulson:
Hi, John.

[Coulson punches Garrett]

John Garrett:
Hi, Phil.

[Garrett knocks Coulson across the room]

Phil Coulson:
Well, that's new.

Phil Coulson:
Sir?

Nick Fury:
You don't have to call me "sir", Coulson. Look at me. I'm dressed like I live under a bridge.

Phil Coulson:
What are you doing here?

Nick Fury:
Well, Simmons turned me onto that old-timey tracker Fitz left on your Bus. I went to great pains to make sure you didn't die the first time.

Phil Coulson:
Well, now's probably not the best time, but... I'd like to have a lengthy conservation with you about that. It might get loud.

Nick Fury:
And I owe you that. But right now, we owe Garrett a punch in the teeth, wouldn't you say?

John Garrett:
Fury! Well, hell... When was the last time anyone saw a tag-team wrestling match with four dead guys?

Phil Coulson:
I see only one dead guy in here.

John Garrett:
Oh, the power's all on this side of the room, fellas. Phil, I'm surprised you try and stop me. Of course, I don't blame you, Nick. You haven't seen the big picture, the big bang, the timeless frozen ocean, but Phil here has. We share a bond. We're blood brothers.

Nick Fury:
You didn't tell me he'd gone this crazy.

Phil Coulson:
He's really stepped it up a notch.

John Garrett:
You remember that speech you used to give us, Nick, about how one man can accomplish anything once he realizes he can be something bigger? Well, now I am.

Nick Fury:
A part - a *part* of something bigger.

John Garrett:
Is that how it went?

Phil Coulson:
Not a great listener.

Nick Fury:
If you told me this whole Hydra path thing you took is because you misheard my damn "one man" speech...

John Garrett:
I am the key to the future of the universe. I'm the origin of all things.

Nick Fury:
[to Coulson] You got it right?

Phil Coulson:
Totally. Loud and clear.

Phil Coulson:
You got a chance to express all your feelings?

Melinda May:
Is he still breathing?

Phil Coulson:
Guess she kept some of it to herself.

Melinda May:
He's having trouble speaking. I think I fractured his larynx.

Phil Coulson:
Oh, good.

[Walks up to Ward]

Phil Coulson:
Your attempt to cross off Fitz and Simmons failed, but Fitz may never be the same again. So I'm going to invent new ways to ruin the rest of your life. I will do whatever is necessary to get Hydra Intel from you, but your torture - it's going to be internal.

Melinda May:
And a little bit external.

Phil Coulson:
Sure. Some of that. But you devoted your entire life to a deranged narcissist who never gave a damn about anyone, and now he's dead. You've got the rest of your life to wrestle with the question - who are you without him?

John Garrett:
[Flexing his new Dethlok-tech robotic body] There's a reason why they say, "cut off the head." Now I'll be unstop...

John Garrett:
[gets vaporized by Coulson]

Phil Coulson:
[Holding the "0-8-4", the object that turned out to be HYDRA technology powered by Tesseract energy] Hey, guys! I found it. Told you it'd be in here.

Phil Coulson:
Fury alway said a man can accomplish anything when he realizes he's a part of something bigger. A team of people who share that conviction can change the world. So what do you say? You ready to change the world?

Melinda May:
No. I'm ready to kick some ass.

Phil Coulson:
That works too.

Phil Coulson:
[after finding several Hydra super-soldiers in Ernest's Barber Shop]... So, who do we talk to about getting a haircut?

Skye:
I feel sorry for you... betraying the only people who gave you a chance at being a decent human being. Fitz was a hero because he still wanted to give you that chance after everything. But some people are just born evil, I guess.

Grant Ward:
Yeah. Yeah, maybe they are. I've learned things about you, Skye... history... things you'll want to know. You and I aren't that different.

Skye:
[Scoffs] You're not the evil I was referring to. Garrett is evil. You're just... weak, doing anything you're told. I hope Garrett orders you to walk into traffic.

Agent Kaminsky:
If it isn't the Cavalry.

Melinda May:
[Kicks him in the stomach] Don't ever call me that.

John Garrett:
[Writing with a nail on a board] Just getting some ideas down. I can't keep everything in my head.

Grant Ward:
Got to be honest with you, John. Looks like you're kind of losing it.

John Garrett:
[Chuckling] I'm alive for the first time, thanks to you. Took some hits along the way, but we did it.

Leo Fitz:
You looked very peaceful sleeping. Didn't want to wake you, but I'm glad that you're up.

Jemma Simmons:
What's happening?

Leo Fitz:
I've spent the last hour trying to figure out why we sank. We're at the bottom of the ocean, in case you missed that bit.

Jemma Simmons:
How did we survive the fall?

Leo Fitz:
The plane must have been in vertical flight mode, flying low. I managed to strap us to one of the backboards before we hit. And I broke my arm - same two places I broke it in second grade, which is strange.

Raina:
Ward's concerned you're going mad.

John Garrett:
The drug didn't just strengthen my body. It gave me clarity of mind. It gave me a vision of the world that's waiting beneath the surface of this world. You don't think that's mad, do you? You know exactly what I'm talking about. You always have.

Raina:
I have no allegiance to Hydra, Centipede, Cybertek, you. I was only ever interested in...

John Garrett:
Evolution. You know we're prehistoric creatures oozing out of the swamps, through the mist, clawing our way onto land so we can finally stand. Or plant roots. Or fly.

Raina:
Exactly. I was saddened to learn you weren't Clairvoyant. I had a question I didn't get to ask, but now...

John Garrett:
Now the truth is written on the back of my eyes. So go ahead, Flowers. Ask.

Raina:
What will I become?

Jemma Simmons:
Are you scared?

Leo Fitz:
Yeah. And I'm hungry, too.

Jemma Simmons:
Me too. Scared, not hungry.

Jemma Simmons:
What do you think it's like?

Leo Fitz:
Death? Well, depends on the method, really. Drowning's supposed to be quite pleasant in the end, apparently. Once the water fills up your lungs...

Jemma Simmons:
I mean after.

Leo Fitz:
Ah, yeah. Well, my mum always said that you shouldn't be afraid because it's just like the way life was before you were born which wasn't that bad, was it?

Jemma Simmons:
That's sweet. Though, apparently, I was miserable before I was born upside down, umbilical cord all wrapped around my head.

Jemma Simmons:
I like to think about the first law of thermodynamics, that no energy in the universe is created and... none is destroyed.

Jemma Simmons, Leo Fitz:
None is destroyed.

[Both smile]

Jemma Simmons:
That means that every bit of energy inside us, every particle will go on to be a part of something else. Maybe live as a dragonfish, a microbe, maybe burn in a supernova ten billion years from now. And every part of us now was once a part of some other thing - a moon, a storm cloud, a mammoth.

Leo Fitz:
A monkey.

Jemma Simmons:
[Smiles] A monkey. Thousands and thousands of other beautiful things that were just as terrified to die as we are. We gave them new life. Good one, I hope.

Jemma Simmons:
Fitz, the glass!

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, it's bulletproof, pressure-resistant.

Jemma Simmons:
But the seal is 4-hydroxy-4-methyl-2-pentanone, I'm sure!

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, I know what you're thinking, but the flash point is too high for it to burn.

Jemma Simmons:
But medical ethanol has a low flash point, and it burns...

Leo Fitz:
Hotter. We could use the defibrillator as an ignition source...

Jemma Simmons:
And build a compressed explosive...

Leo Fitz:
To ignite the seal, the outside pressure will...

Jemma Simmons, Leo Fitz:
Blow the window in!

[Start jumping up and down excited]

Leo Fitz:
Yes, yes, yes, yes! This really hurts my arm.

Grant Ward:
What the hell did you say to Garrett?

Raina:
I listened.

Grant Ward:
He's psychotic! Did you notice that? I just had to lock up six government officials because he butchered the seventh one. He completely lost it in there.

Raina:
You're wrong. Garrett's not lost. Far from it, he's connected now.

Grant Ward:
Don't tell me you're following him into this madness. His talk of evolution...

Raina:
I agree with him. *You're* the one who follows him.

Phil Coulson:
Trip, if the rest of us don't make it, I still want this place to burn.

Antoine Triplett:
I prefer you make it, sir.

Phil Coulson:
Me, too.

Jemma Simmons:
They told us you were dead.

Nick Fury:
Good. We want word to get around on that.

Grant Ward:
You're not gonna kill us with the bomb. You'd go, too.

Skye:
No. I have a weapon much better than a bomb that will absolutely destroy you.

Grant Ward:
And why's that?

Skye:
Because you slept with her, and she's really pissed off. [May attacks Ward]

Nick Fury:
It was a "break glass in case of emergency" situation.

Phil Coulson:
Yes, but that emergency was supposed to be the fall of an Avenger.

Nick Fury:
Exactly.

Nick Fury:
The principle SHIELD was founded upon was pure.

Melinda May:
Protection.

Nick Fury:
Protection. One word. Sometimes, to protect one man against himself other times, to protect the planet against an alien invasion from another universe. It's a broad job description.

Phil Coulson:
No need to tell me.

Nick Fury:
But the belief that drives us all is the same, whether it's one man or all mankind.

Phil Coulson:
That they're worth saving.

Phil Coulson:
So what do ya say, ready to change the world?

Melinda May:
No. But I'm ready to kick some ass.

Leo Fitz:
But I couldn't find the courage to tell you. So, please. Let me show you. It's ok, Jemma. Jemma we have to hurry.

Jemma Simmons:
No.

Leo Fitz:
Take it. Take it. [Pushes button]

Jemma Simmons:
NO!

Jemma Simmons:
You were looking?

Nick Fury:
For my man, Coulson. Understand you're involved in a dispute I might wanna weigh in on.

Phil Coulson:
Sir?

Nick Fury:
You don't have to call me sir, Coulson. Look at me. I'm dressed like I live under a bridge.

Nick Fury:
This packs a pretty good punch.

Phil Coulson:
I know what it does.

John Garrett:
I order you to stand down. You must obey me. You need to to translate the words of creation. You don't wanna do this , Mike. Tell him, Phil.

Phil Coulson:
Mr Peterson is free to do whatever he wants. [Mike Peterson stomps Garrett in his face]

Nick Fury:
You think he learned his lesson?

Phil Coulson:
He learned something.

John Garrett:
There's a reason they say cut off the head. Now I'll be unstop... [Zap]

Phil Coulson:
He guys... I found it. I told you it'd be in here.

Phil Coulson:
Stupid, stupid, stupid, and cruel, and very stupid!

Nick Fury:
I think you've made your point.

Phil Coulson:
Why bring me back in the first place. Clearly I didn't think it was the best idea. I warned you about people losing their minds.

Nick Fury:
Agent May was on top of the situation, she says you're fine. Aren't you? It was a break glass in case of emergency situation.

Phil Coulson:
Yes, but that emergency was supposed to be the fall of an Avenger.

Nick Fury:
Exactly. And I'm damned glad I did it too. When you wanna build something you need a strong foundation. You know how few people I trust, Coulson.

Phil Coulson:
You can count them on one hand.

Nick Fury:
And I'm not afraid to cut off fingers. The principle SHIELD was founded on was pure.

Melinda May:
Protection.

Nick Fury:
Protection. One word. Sometimes to protect one man from himself,other times to protect the planet against an alien invasion from another universe. It's a broad job description.

Phil Coulson:
No need to tell me.

Nick Fury:
But the belief that drives us all is the same. Whether it's one man, or all mankind.

Phil Coulson:
That they're worth saving.

Nick Fury:
That truth lives inside you, Coulson. Before it was torn apart, S.H.I.E.L.D. was a lot of moving parts. Guys like you were the heart. Now you'll be the head.

Phil Coulson:
What is it?

Nick Fury:
Toolbox. To help you build it back up.

Phil Coulson:
You want me to start over, rebuild S.H.I.E.L.D.

Nick Fury:
From scratch. Take your time, and do it right. You'll still have his back.

Melinda May:
Of course.

Nick Fury:
There's no one else I trust with this.

Phil Coulson:
Thank you, sir. How do you... How should I proceed?

Nick Fury:
That's up to you, Director.

Melinda May:
And you sir, where you heading now?

Nick Fury:
Trading in my birds eye view for two solid feet on the ground. This is the last time you'll be seeing me for a stretch.

Phil Coulson:
Your going to disappear. Nowhere to be found.

Nick Fury:
Nowhere? You know me better than that, Phil. I'll be everywhere.

John Garrett:
Well hell, when was the last time anyone saw a tag-team wrestling match with four dead guys.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[ineffectively shoots at Lash] Really got to commit to that shotgun-axe idea.

Phil Coulson:
[after May shoots Andrew into the containment unit and is shown to have survived] [shocked] How did you know that wasn't going to kill him?

Melinda May:
I didn't.

Phil Coulson:
I think the conspiracy nut in you had a few too many lattes this morning.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
I did have a latte. It was a double.

Dwight Frye:
I only told them the truth - that you're being... merciful.

Lash:
I'm not merciful. I'm necessary.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
How'd I let you talk me into this? I had a garage. A workbench full of new tools. My own espresso machine.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
[On the hunt with Mack, guns drawn] We've gotta figure how this thing is finding inhumans and why it's killing them.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I know why.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
Yeah, why?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Instinct. It's like a great white shark. Built to eat, sleep...

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
And kill.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I was gonna say make little baby sharks, but then Jaws was probably twenty years before you were born, so...

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
[He's interrupted by a noise and they stop, looking down a dark hallway] Do we have movement?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I don't know. I can't see a damn thing.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
[They're not moving] Well, do you want me to take point?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[Slowly moves forward] I'm going. I'm going.

Rosalind Price:
Everybody, stand down! S.H.I.E.L.D.'s not the enemy, and you definitely don't wanna piss off the young Agent Johnson here. [to Daisy] We've got about nineteen Agent Johnsons on our side, though none that can take down a building.

Phil Coulson:
Where are you taking the victims?

Rosalind Price:
That's classified. Oh, it's not fun when it's you, right? Can't believe I just said that to the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Phil Coulson:
You know, I'm really not feeling the spirit of cooperation here.

Phil Coulson:
It's okay. The A.T.C.U. is here to help.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Really? 'Cause the other day, they wanted Daisy's head for their trophy case!

Phil Coulson:
Agent Mackenzie.

Rosalind Price:
Bit of an exaggeration- but, that was then, and this is now. And, right now, we're here to contain a threat, same as you. Fan out! [she and her team move out]

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
I get that you cut a deal with them, but for the record...

Phil Coulson:
It's a means to an end.

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
Ours, or theirs?

Rosalind Price:
Do you really have a laser finger?

Phil Coulson:
Sorry. It's classified.

Melinda May:
It's not what you think, Coulson. It's just an Icer.

Phil Coulson:
This one is not. It's real, with real bullets.

Agent Blake:
Mr. Peterson... stop. You have a son - Ace. He needs you. We can still help you, Mike.

Deathlok:
Mike Peterson's dead.

John Garrett:
Impressive toy.

Leo Fitz:
I prefer the term "hard-tech hardware."

Victoria Hand:
Bet the clairvoyant didn't see that coming.

John Garrett:
Damn, I must be getting old. Either that or I drank a lot more in my 30s than I remember.

Victoria Hand:
In your hunt for Santa Claus? No. I'm taking a transport jet back to the Hub where I can coordinate with the field teams via satellite. Someone's going to have to pull your asses out of the fire when things go south.

Jemma Simmons:
Brilliant deduction, Dr. Watson.

Leo Fitz:
I always pictured *you* as Watson.

Antoine Triplett:
You really think the Clairvoyant was on the index?

John Garrett:
Rejected off the index. Possibly. Just hope it's not the amazing Kreskin. [Chuckles] I used to love that guy.

Agent Blake:
You a Scorpio? [May looks at him] I was just wondering why our newest agent paired the two of us together. Must have thought we were compatible in some way.

Melinda May:
It was random, Blake.

Agent Blake:
You seem like a Scorpio.

Melinda May:
You don't believe in the Clairvoyant, but you believe in astrology?

Skye:
Ward said that the Clairvoyant knew how to push all the right buttons.

Phil Coulson:
Raina did that to me, too.

Skye:
Did she mention your father's death? [Gesturing to a file on a tablet] Your psych evaluation called it "a defining moment". These aren't just personality tests. They're surveillance on every agent pictures, stats, where you've been stationed, who you'd visit, where you'd like to eat.

Phil Coulson:
[Reading] Dinners at the Richmond. He's been monitoring us. Think about it. The Clairvoyant only knew you'd be at Quinn's villa...

Skye:
After I dropped a tracker. And the only thing he's had trouble seeing is what happened to you after you died.

Phil Coulson:
Because Director Fury wouldn't release that file to anyone.

Skye:
[Realizing where this is going] No...

Phil Coulson:
The Clairvoyant doesn't have abilities. He has security clearance. He's an agent of SHIELD.

Phil Coulson:
[Skye has just been made a full agent] You earned this.

John Garrett:
Hell, you took two in the gut. More than Sitwell here's ever done.

Leo Fitz:
I didn't do anything!

Skye:
What? I didn't say you did. [Beat] What did you do?

Victoria Hand:
You realize, Agent Coulson, they have these things called teleconferences now.

Phil Coulson:
Nice to see you too, Agent Hand.

Jemma Simmons:
We'd like to send a blood sample of yours to some colleagues to do a molecular breakdown. Maybe if you spoke to Agent Coulson...

Skye:
Yeah, I don't think that's a good idea. If Coulson thinks it's important that this thing stays between us, then we should trust him, right? He's the boss.

Jemma Simmons:
So you're saying we should *obey* the rules?

Leo Fitz:
Who are you and what have you done with Skye?

Victoria Hand:
The plan was flawed from the start.

John Garrett:
Come on, Vic. The plan was solid.

Victoria Hand:
We have an agent down because we weren't prepared.

John Garrett:
Blake knew the risks.

Victoria Hand:
And don't call me "Vic"; it's condescending.

Skye:
[to Agent Ward] You're a robot. Can you do that?

Akela Amador:
Why are you doing this? Why are you helping me? Where's the "I told you so"?

Phil Coulson:
That's not me anymore.

Phil Coulson:
It's amazing. Every year, this part of our job gets easier. Between Facebook, Instagram, and Flickr, people are surveilling themselves.

Melinda May:
Bus to short bus.

Grant Ward:
Go for short bus.

Phil Coulson:
Next time I'll decide what we call ourselves, OK.

Skye:
What's up Phil.

Phil Coulson:
I prefer you not call me Phil.

Skye:
Ok, you're the boss AC.

Phil Coulson:
Have you seen Skye?

Grant Ward:
Not since weapons training.

Phil Coulson:
She stop saying "bang" when she pulls the trigger?

Grant Ward:
Mostly. Now if she can just learn the difference between the safety release and the magazine release, we will be making real progress.

Phil Coulson:
Maybe I should learn to fly. It's not too late right? I could learn. What do you like best, freedom, the view?

Melinda May:
The solitude.

Phil Coulson:
Got it. See you in Sweden. [Leaves the cockpit, May smiles]

Skye:
So you asked how she could have cracked the system. I have a pitch, but it's way outside the box.

Phil Coulson:
I live outside the box.

Skye:
There are people in the world with superpowers, right? What if this woman has ESP or something?

Melinda May:
There are no credible studies that support precognition, telepathy, or extrasensory perception.

Skye:
But this woman knew impossible things. And why did she close her eyes? That's either random or totally important. Was she listening or... [Taps her head]... Was she reading minds?

Grant Ward:
[Fitz and Ward are playing poker on the plane] I call, and raise a hundred.

Leo Fitz:
Do you know how I'm gonna beat you?

Grant Ward:
By losing?

Leo Fitz:
You have a tell. A psychological tick that lets me know you're bluffing. If I watch you carefully... [louder, into his earpiece] If I watch you carefully...

Skye:
[In another room] Oh, sorry. One minute. [Grabs the eye-spy x-ray glasses] You know that if I do this, I'll not only see Ward's cards, I'll see you without any clothes on?

Leo Fitz:
[to Ward]... I fold, you win. [Scurries away]

Skye:
What do they mean "target"?

Grant Ward:
It's never good, especially for the target.

Skye:
I called with an equally pressing question for you, my S.O... What are we supposed to do if we have to pee?

Grant Ward:
[unamused] You broke protocol because you needed a bathroom break.

Skye:
It was a really, really long drive and everyone's nervous.

Grant Ward:
[sighs] There's a container at the bottom of the blue chest.

Skye:
[to Simmons] Bottom of the blue chest. [Simmons and goes digging and pulls out an empty water bottle. She gives Skye a look]

Skye:
Not the *water bottle*.

Grant Ward:
That's the one.

Skye:
Did you never learn the thing where boy parts and girl parts are different, and our parts aren't penises!

Grant Ward:
Coulson and I are trying to find a dangerous criminal, if there's nothing else pressing...

Skye:
One more thing, Fitz wants to know if you packed any snacks.

Leo Fitz:
[Into the phone] I'm feeling a bit peckish.

Skye:
[There's a noise on the other end] Ah, Hello, hello? He hung *up*!

Phil Coulson:
I want your help with something.

Skye:
Hit me with it.

Phil Coulson:
You ever rob a bank?

Skye:
[Slightly surprised] No.

Phil Coulson:
An armored car?

Skye:
Nope.

Phil Coulson:
How about a casino?

Skye:
Should I be offended?

Skye:
[Watching a broadcast they just decrypted] Russian TV seems kind of boring.

Leo Fitz:
That looks a bit like our van.

Skye:
[Suspicious] What are we looking at?

Leo Fitz:
[Realizing]... Us. [Their van gets rammed by another car]

Grant Ward:
Let's hope it's a knockout and not a kill.

Skye:
You should get out of there.

Grant Ward:
[Resolute] I've come this far. I'll finish, whatever it takes. [Message appears: SEDUCE HIM] Help.

Skye:
Did you say, "help"? Because a minute ago, you said you didn't want or need my help.

Grant Ward:
That was *before* they asked me to go all Mata Hari on this guy.

Grant Ward:
I only get one shot. And it has to knock a person back, as well as out.

Leo Fitz:
Which is why we're perfecting this little beauty: [Holds up his latest stun-gun] .45-caliber cartridges, semi-automatic. Each mag Contains eight therapeutic rounds of dendrotoxin.

Jemma Simmons:
In case you miss! [Ward gives her a look] Or have multiple assailants.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, we're gonna have this new night-night pistol working in no time.

Grant Ward:
Okay? - Great. One thing: we're not calling it that.

Jemma Simmons:
[to Fitz] Ah, told you.

Leo Fitz:
[Slightly dejectedly] Yes, we yes, we are.

Skye:
What do we have to do if we have to pee?

Grant Ward:
You broke protocol because you need a bathroom break?

Skye:
It was a really, really long drive, and everyone's nervous.

Grant Ward:
There's a container at the bottom of the blue chest.

Skye:
[Searches chest] Not the water bottle.

Grant Ward:
Yes.

Skye:
Did you never learn the thing where girl parts and boy parts are different and our parts are not penises?

Grant Ward:
I've come this far, I'll finish, whatever it takes. [System display displays message "Seduce him"]

Grant Ward:
[Gulps nervously] Help.

Leo Fitz:
Here's the new Night-Night pistol.

[Ward tries it out]

Grant Ward:
Sorry, Fitz. It's close, but it's just not right.

Leo Fitz:
[Quietly] 'Cause agent Coulson had no problems.

Grant Ward:
It's an ounce too heavy.

Skye:
[Sitting nearby] An ounce? Seriously?

Grant Ward:
It's the difference between success and failure. When you're on a rooftop with a 15-mile-an-hour wind, Your target is 500 yards away...

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, but we do have a rifle.

Grant Ward:
[Looks at Fitz] Lose the ounce. [Leaves]

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, okay. On it. "Lose the ounce". [Imitating Ward] I'm Agent Grant Ward, and I can shoot the legs off a flea from 500 yards, as long as it's not windy. [Skye laughs]

Jemma Simmons:
[Jemma Enters the Lab] So, Ward was here? Let me guess the night-night pistol again?

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, and he said it was off by an ounce.

Jemma Simmons:
Of course he did. [Also imitating Ward] I'm Agent Grant Ward, and I could rupture your spleen with my left pinky... blindfolded!

Jemma Simmons:
This is the victim's brain.

Phil Coulson:
It looks like a burnt baked potato.

Melinda May:
Whether it was 8 seconds or 40, you died. There's no way you can go through a trauma like that and not come out of it changed. You know how long it's taken me to...

Phil Coulson:
I know.

Melinda May:
The point of these things is to remind us that... There is no going back, there's only moving forward. You feel different because you *are* different.

Grant Ward:
I wanted it to be a person, some super-powered psychopath - someone I could hurt, someone I could... punish. That I could do. What I can't do is protect you guys from stuff I can't even see or understand.

Melinda May:
That her medical report?

Phil Coulson:
Mine, actually. Blood work finally came back. I'm perfectly normal - little heavy on the iron. But don't worry - you don't have to start calling me Iron Man.

Melinda May:
Wasn't planning on it.

Skye:
Phys-Ed teacher at the local high school and varsity baseball coach and troop leader and volunteer firefighter. This guy makes Captain America look like "The Dude" [blank stares] The Big Lebowski? [more blank stares] Seriously?

Phil Coulson:
[Entering the lab] What's Fitz doing out there?

Jemma Simmons:
He... detected a strange energy about the body.

Phil Coulson:
He's afraid of it, isn't he?

Leo Fitz:
[From the other room] It's the smell!

Leo Fitz:
Do you remember the last time you brought a dead thing into the lab?

Jemma Simmons:
[sighs] Oh, not the stupid cat again.

Leo Fitz:
The cat - [pointing at Coulson] Tell him about the cat!

Jemma Simmons:
And it's *our* lab Fitz, not *your* lab.

Leo Fitz:
[yelling] You left his liver next to my lunch!

Phil Coulson:
Any idea what could cause an effect like this?

Jemma Simmons:
[Speaking in unison with Fitz] There's the soliton hypothesis.

Leo Fitz:
Well, okay, judging by the horizontal...

Jemma Simmons:
Perhaps nanobatteries...

Leo Fitz:
...electrical discharge could be...

Phil Coulson:
[Interrupting] Time. Let's try again. Any idea what could cause an effect like this?

Jemma Simmons:
Hell if I know.

Leo Fitz:
Uh, no, no clue.

Jemma Simmons:
Well, you can officially tell your physical therapist that you're fit as the proverbial fiddle, especially for a man of your age.

Phil Coulson:
"A man of my age?" That's something you say to an old person.

Phil Coulson:
I got hurt once - pretty bad. And, I died. Some say it was for only eight seconds, but I know it was for more than that. I know I wasn't here anymore. I was there.

Tony Diaz:
What's it like?

Phil Coulson:
It's beautiful.

Jemma Simmons:
[Coulson is running on the treadmill] Working up a good sweat there, sir?

Phil Coulson:
I don't sweat, I glisten.

Melinda May:
You figure out why the body was floating?

Jemma Simmons:
The molecular density of the victim was temporarily altered by an unknown energy source. I'm hoping to shed some light on its effects once I extract a brain-tissue sample.

Leo Fitz:
It's happening again!

Jemma Simmons:
It's science, Fitz! I have to dissect something.

Agent Blake:
Coulson, nice to see you're not dead.

Phil Coulson:
Did you get our analysis of the virus?

Agent Blake:
We did, and SHIELD has no record of anything like it. No one does. So it's imperative it reach the sandbox without incident. In case of a pandemic, we're going to need it.

Phil Coulson:
I'm aware, but don't need more orders or ultimatums. I need answers.

Agent Blake:
I wish I had some for you. I'm sorry, Coulson I've been ordered to inform you that if you have infected cargo, you need to dump it. [Coulson is silent] Do you copy me, Coulson? The orders are coming from up top.

Phil Coulson:
I'm sorry bad connection. Didn't get that last part. [Hangs up the conference call, As May walks in] Don't even think it.

Melinda May:
I don't have to. That's your job.

Leo Fitz:
I was doing just fine tucked away in a safe, indoor, non-mobile lab at the academy! Then you had to go and drag us into this flying circus! Didn't even pass our field assessments, for God's sake!

Jemma Simmons:
Please, as if I forced you to follow me anywhere.

Leo Fitz:
You said, and I quote "Fitz, "it's the most perfect opportunity "for us to see the world. We'd be fools to pass this one up!"

Jemma Simmons:
I hate it when you use that voice. That's not even how I sound. And you were just afraid of going into the field.

Leo Fitz:
I'm not afraid...

Jemma Simmons:
And don't you dare act like these last few months haven't been the highlight of your entire pasty life!

Leo Fitz:
Pasty? Really? Well, when did you become so sun-kissed? Because I'm pretty sure that every minute of every day, You've been stuck in a lab right beside me. At the academy, at sci-ops, this plane. You've been beside me the whole damn time! [Starts to get emotional] You have to fix this.

Jemma Simmons:
Fitz, I don't know what you think you're doing, but...

Leo Fitz:
I'm doing what we always do. We're gonna fix this. Together.

Grant Ward:
So, what did you think of your first time skydiving?

Jemma Simmons:
Honestly, I'd rather not to think about it anymore.

Grant Ward:
I thought what you did was incredibly brave.

Jemma Simmons:
Ah. I suppose now's as good a time as any to tell you that I may have misled you earlier. You see, when I gave you back the night-night pistol, I lied - it's still an ounce off.

Grant Ward:
I know.

Jemma Simmons:
[Surprised] You do?

Grant Ward:
After all, [Mimics her imitation of him] I'm agent Grant Ward. I just jumped out of a plane without a parachute on, and saved your life!

Jemma Simmons:
[Smiles] Actually, that's not quite it. It's a bit more nasally than that.

Agent Blake:
[Final Scene] That's the best you could come up with, you got a bad connection?

Phil Coulson:
I was pressed for time.

Agent Blake:
Bold move. You know our chat wasn't exactly private.

Phil Coulson:
They never are.

Agent Blake:
I don't know what happened to you in New York, if you really flat-lined or that's just what they tell us when we reach level 7; but whatever did happen doesn't give you license to disobey a direct order from HQ. You keep pulling stunts like that, someone might decide to take this little dream team away from you.

Phil Coulson:
I'd like to see them try.

Agent Blake:
That doesn't sound like the Phil Coulson I used to know.

Phil Coulson:
No, I suppose it doesn't. Get used to it.

Phil Coulson:
Laser grids. Why's there always laser grids?

[watching May and her Hydra double face off]

Phil Coulson:
I can't believe I'm the only one seeing this right now.

Melinda May:
So, what did she do? Fake me. How'd you know it wasn't me?

Phil Coulson:
Little things. And she wanted to get coffee.

Melinda May:
Ah. Punch her in the face?

Phil Coulson:
Yeah.

Melinda May:
Good.

Phil Coulson:
Maybe this will sound weird but, how about when this is over, you and I go finally get that cup of coffee we were supposed to get all those years back?

Agent Q:
[Disguised as Melinda May] I thought you'd never ask. Once this is over, I'd like that.

Phil Coulson:
[Punches her in the face] May hates coffee.

Phil Coulson:
This is fun, right? Isn't this fun? Look - [Holds up his sleeves] Cufflinks!

Melinda May:
I will pay you $500 right now for a pair of flats.

Lance Hunter:
Bridget said Soto's sending out the painting for verification first thing in the morning. She, uh, whispered it in my ear, if you know what I mean.

Phil Coulson:
Yes, everybody on the planet knows what you mean, Hunter. Let's focus.

Skye:
[Hears a noise over the comms] Wait. What was that?

Phil Coulson:
Yeah. That's May.

Skye:
Is-is she okay? Is everything okay?

Phil Coulson:
Yes. She's laughing. I think the worst of it's over now.

Melinda May:
[Walks up to Coulson] My face hurts.

Phil Coulson:
We're blown.

Melinda May:
Why?

Phil Coulson:
No idea. I think Talbot's still pissed 'cause we kidnapped him that time.

Melinda May:
I assume this all makes you happy.

Phil Coulson:
Why would this make me happy?

Melinda May:
We failed in our mission. We're outnumbered, trapped, hoping not to get killed. Feels like the old days to me.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[the gang is talking about exes] You know, I wish I could relate, but all my exes are awesome.

Lance Hunter:
Is that right? I seem to remember an entire year where you had to pretend you liked quinoa.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Yeah. That was a dark time.

Agent Q:
Agent May, surrender, and you will find satisfaction.

Melinda May:
I get my satisfaction elsewhere.

Agent Q:
The best part about killing you is that I won't have to be you anymore.

Melinda May:
If you were really me... you wouldn't talk so much.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
I did what, now?

Phil Coulson:
I know. It's a lot to process.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
I mean, a painting, Coulson, and you weren't immediately suspicious it wasn't me?

Phil Coulson:
To be fair, we're not that close.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Sir. Notice the car? 1962 Rolls. Restored it myself.

Phil Coulson:
[smiling] I noticed. Still not lettin' you work on Lola.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[smiling back] In time, sir. In time.

Phil Coulson:
This is fun, right?

[to May. They are dressed formally to go under cover]

Phil Coulson:
Isn't this fun? Look. Cuff links.

Melinda May:
[sternly] I will pay you $500 right now for a pair of flats.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[gravely] Good luck, sir.

Melinda May:
[laughing while under cover] I must get a picture of us together. [Turns to Coulson] Charles. C'mere. Honey, can you take a picture of me and Mr. Soto? It's be such a nice momento of the evening.

Phil Coulson:
Oh, yes, that would be nice.

Gabriel Soto:
He's... your husband?

Melinda May:
[to Soto] We're modern. [to Coulson] Charles? Please?

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Agent Coulson. Agent May. Seems like you're in a hurry.

Phil Coulson:
The caterers ran out of coconut shrimp. There's no reason to stay.

Melinda May:
[Referring to Talbot] I'll handle it.

Phil Coulson:
May...

Melinda May:
Hey, this is the part I do. It'll make up for all the dancing.

Phil Coulson:
You liked it.

Melinda May:
No, I didn't.

Phil Coulson:
A little bit?

Melinda May:
A little bit.

Lance Hunter:
[Referring to his marriage] No, it didn't work out because interspecies relationships are hard. I was a human. Whereas she was a demonic hell beast.

Lance Hunter:
[Walking into the room with Mac and Fitz] Guys. Drop everything.

Leo Fitz:
[Looking at the cylinder in his hands] No, this is worth a fortune. I'm not going to drop it.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
[to Coulson] You know, I spent five long months in an enemy war camp. You people make me miss those days.

Priest:
[about the painting] It dates back to Spain, the early 1500s. It was the only item in our entire church that was spared. It's a miracle; one which might help us rebuild.

Bishop:
Experts will have to verify it, of course.

Priest:
Your grace, shouldn't it be enough simply to believe in the miracle? Does it have to be proven?

Bishop:
Faith is enough for us, but the rest of the world... they'll need something more tangible.

Phil Coulson:
You weren't exactly thrilled when we got assigned that retrieval op in Sausalito that coffee shop, our first mission?

Melinda May:
That's because the commander sent us in with no exit plan. I was in the bay for five hours.

Phil Coulson:
I fished you out... eventually.

Lance Hunter:
It's weird-women just like me. always have. Never understood it. Must be a magnetism thing, I guess. Who can explain it, eh?

Skye:
If it makes you feel any better, I don't get it, either.

Lance Hunter:
You hear that? If I wanted someone to take jabs at me, I'd still be married.

Sunil Bakshi:
Welcome back, Agent May. I have a few questions for you. For example, why your sudden interest in religious artwork?

Melinda May:
Everybody has a hobby.

Sunil Bakshi:
You and your small band of S.H.I.E.L.D. compatriots... there can't be many of you left. Who's running your operation? Where are you based?

Melinda May:
Currently? About five feet from kicking your ass.

Daniel Whitehall:
Hello, Raina. I'm Daniel Whitehall. You recently took something from me.

Raina:
Oh, the Obelisk. I see what this is now. I can help you...

Daniel Whitehall:
Raina, I'm not like most of the people with whom you interact. I'm not easily confused. I've been around too long to lose sight of what's mine. I generally don't do my own dirty work anymore. We should all aspire to do only that which we enjoy, don't you agree? But in your case, I will make an exception.

Skye:
Johnson - Is that your last name?

Calvin Zabo:
Was. Pretty ordinary, huh? I changed it to something more sinister when I went on the run.

Skye:
Daisy Johnson. Huh.

Lance Hunter:
Three men, heavily armed - bet there's more where they came from.

Grant Ward:
Does it matter? They got a cyborg on board with rockets in his arm.

Phil Coulson:
He's not a cyborg - he's a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent... with rockets in his arm.

Lincoln Campbell:
What are you made of?

Deathlok:
Whoever you are, you don't want to do this. I'm a friend of Skye's.

Lincoln Campbell:
Sure. And I'm the Hulk.

Phil Coulson:
Take me to your leader.

Phil Coulson:
[to Mack and Bobbi after a fire fight between SHIELD and Hydra] I doubled back after Hydra took off. The cleanup crew really sucks, doesn't it?

Skye:
Did you just give me a compliment?

Grant Ward:
I - no, I made a comment.

Skye:
A kind one. Did it physically hurt to do that? Do you need an ice pack? [Ward smiles]

Skye:
Wow! A compliment and a smile.

Miles Lydon:
You've changed.

Skye:
Good.

Miles Lydon:
I mean, you're not who you used to be.

Skye:
And you're not who I thought you were.

Miles Lydon:
I hope you find what you are looking for.

Chan Ho Yin:
You want to make Chan Ho Yin a famous name?

Raina:
No. You need a simpler name, a more powerful name, a name like... Scorch.

Chan Ho Yin:
Scorch? Are you joking?

Raina:
Have you ever heard of Steve Rogers? No. But Captain America, now, he's on the news, on a lunchbox, on a poster on the wall.

Phil Coulson:
Go ahead, say it.

Melinda May:
I don't do petty.

Phil Coulson:
But you called it. I trusted my gut even though you said she was a risk.

Melinda May:
When someone breaks into my house, I usually don't invite them to stay. But that's me.

Phil Coulson:
That's me too. Then that alien staff when through my heart.

Melinda May:
Sure it didn't go through the brain?

Phil Coulson:
You really don't do comforting either do you?

Phil Coulson:
You've got two choices - take what's in this box, or we put you in a slightly bigger one.

Melinda May:
His file say anything about him being homicidal?

Phil Coulson:
Just said he was kind of a tool.

Phil Coulson:
Mr. Chan, believe it or not, this could still get worse.

Chan Ho Yin:
Bend someone long enough and they break. Poor little Chan Ho Yen may have believed your lies... but not Scorch!

Melinda May:
Who?

Phil Coulson:
Oh, crap. They gave him a name.

Skye:
I don't want to ruin the moment. But I'm gonna have to respond with... G4. Say it, Ward. Say it.

Grant Ward:
You sank my battleship.

Skye:
[about the subjects on the Index] How are they monitored? Tapped phones? Satellite surveillance... body probes? In dark, unpleasant places?

Leo Fitz:
Body probes, that's ridiculous, SHIELD doesn't do that. We don't do that... [Looks at Coulson] do we?

Phil Coulson:
The methods vary.

Debbie:
[about Chan] I'm surprised you got him to cooperate.

Raina:
He has dreams. I told him they'd come true.

Debbie:
You gave him a name, didn't you?

Chan Ho Yin:
[During a magic show, speaking Chinese] My grandfather often said that every man is a mystery. Some men harbor beautiful secrets. Others hide darker ones. He believed the only way to know a man's true nature is to pierce his outer shell, and gaze within.

Melinda May:
Everyone, this is Agent Kwan, Chan Ho Yin's case agent. What can you tell us?

Agent Kwan:
[On video-conference] Not much, I'm afraid. Chan is a magician, so at first, I thought he'd made himself disappear.

Phil Coulson:
File said you caught him violating his index agreement before.

Agent Kwan:
On two separate occasions - Claimed we were "hampering his artistic expression". But late last night, he was taken by professionals. The only thing they left behind Was this scrap of aluminized material.

Jemma Simmons:
Fireproof clothing.

Grant Ward:
So whoever took him knew about his power.

Agent Kwan:
Yes, and we think we know why. Over the last few days, Tech division discovered a crack into our data stream. It's the same cyber punks who hacked us before. Somehow, they got in *again*. It's the Rising Tide. [Everyone turns and stares at Skye] Hello? It got real quiet. You guys still there?

Raina:
I apologize for last night. It was important I bring you in under the radar.

Chan Ho Yin:
Ah, SHIELD. Tell Agent Kwan I don't need To be read the power protocols again. It was just a street performance - It's not like I set anyone on fire.

Raina:
I don't work for SHIELD. I come as a friend.

Chan Ho Yin:
English isn't my first language; but that word means something different than you think.

Phil Coulson:
[Watching Skye hack] How close are we?

Leo Fitz:
She's identified the remote-access Trojan and the infected endpoint...

Jemma Simmons:
...And is searching for a tcp to correlate the hypertext with signature information and then, Voila.

Leo Fitz:
...Bob's your uncle.

Phil Coulson:
You get any of that?

Grant Ward:
Only the uncle part.

Leo Fitz:
Miles Lydon, not Skye - that's to all of our relief.

Phil Coulson:
[to Skye] You know him.

Skye:
Every hacker in the world knows him.

Jemma Simmons:
Not just the hacker world. He infiltrated the *Kremlin*

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, the picture of, uh, Putin shirtless on horseback, that was his hack.

Miles Lydon:
You know, I could be helping you. I could be working on algorithms...

Skye:
[Cuts him off] No, I can't contact you. There's a SHIELD looking for you right now - MY team - And if they suspect something, I'm screwed.

Miles Lydon:
There's a joke here, that I'm resisting. That involves the word "screwed".

Debbie:
We don't understand what gave you this ability, but the reason you don't burn Is because your blood platelets are fire-resistant.

Raina:
Which is why we're removing them.

Chan Ho Yin:
[Protesting] Raina, you said I have a gift.

Raina:
And you're giving it.

Phil Coulson:
[about the Centipede facility] Building has five floors. The first four are research.Fifth is listed as maintenance, but uses half the building's energy.

Agent Kwan:
Either they're guarding the world's largest vacuum...

Phil Coulson:
Or that's where Chan's being held.

Skye:
All our talks - Did you mean none of it? I risked everything to help you, and it turns out every word out of your mouth since we met is total crap. "Democratization of knowledge", "the truth will set you free"? The truth sure as hell came out.

Miles Lydon:
I believe in all those things. I just don't know why they have to go hand in hand With barely scraping by. You lived in your van for the last two years.

Skye:
Now you're making fun of my van?

Melinda May:
[Speaking Chinese] Chan, I'm sorry you lived a life you didn't want, but violence will solve nothing.

Chan Ho Yin:
[Also in Chinese] It will keep me from being kept prisoner. By you, by them; there's no difference. I was given this gift for a reason. To burn bright.

Melinda May:
[Still Chinese] There's no turning back.

Chan Ho Yin:
[Chinese] I don't want to go back!

Phil Coulson:
[Looks at May] So we're good, right?

Grant Ward:
You can't save someone from themselves, sir.

Phil Coulson:
You can if you get to them early enough. [Looks at Skye]

Lance Hunter:
Icers? Great. How did we get stuck with a nonlethal option?

Melinda May:
Coin flip. Trip called tails.

Raina:
Let me be clear. Mr. Creel is working for Hydra. I am not.

Phil Coulson:
Why the breakup? Bad dental plan?

Raina:
Hydra only has one thing on their mind: World domination. Which is so 1945.

Phil Coulson:
May, you're approaching a civilian area without backup. If you see him, do not engage. You copy?

[No response]

Phil Coulson:
Do you copy?

[Tires screech and horns blare]

Phil Coulson:
May, that does *not* sound covert.

Antoine Triplett:
No need to think the worst til it shakes your hand and says hello.

Skye:
Is that another one of your grandma things?

Antoine Triplett:
[laughs] Fortune cookie. I had some kung pao chicken the other night.

Phil Coulson:
Right now we have more important problems. A five-alarm fire otherwise known as Lance Hunter.

Skye:
Is he...

Phil Coulson:
Captured. But, if he talks, our entire operation is compromised. We'll have to burn the base and evacuate. [pause] I know. And we just retiled the bathrooms.

Skye:
I know you're the boss. And you have to compartmentalize everything, but it's not healthy. You need to loosen up. Try... yoga... or something. [She turns to leave]

Phil Coulson:
[softly] I tried it. But, I'm... really not flexible. [She closes the door behind her] But thanks.

Lance Hunter:
Where do you want me?

Phil Coulson:
That depends. Can you follow an order?

Lance Hunter:
Absolutely, sir

Phil Coulson:
Because part of me wants you here running back-end. The other part knows we need boots on the ground, and I've only got a few good pairs.

Lance Hunter:
I'll be good. Scout's honor.

Phil Coulson:
[Later, After Hunter breaks orders] Scout's honor? You were never a boy scout, were you? [Hunter gives him a small smile and a shrug]

Phil Coulson:
The reality is I don't have a fleet of helicarriers or Quinn jets or thousands of agents at my disposal anymore. We're lucky we still have our George Forman grill.

Phil Coulson:
Oh. I just need you to do one thing.

Lance Hunter:
Yeah?

Phil Coulson:
Sell me out.

Phil Coulson:
Glenn. Can I... call you Glenn?

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
No. Where's Hunter?

Phil Coulson:
Watching Cake Boss, I believe.

Phil Coulson:
I felt bad for kidnapping you. So, I brought you a peace offering. Carl Creel.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
I thought Creel was dead.

Phil Coulson:
He's turned to stone, but he could always do that, so I'm not sure how long it'll hold. I've got him in a cryo-stasis chamber in the back of the van for

[checks his watch]

Phil Coulson:
58 more minutes. Before the juice runs out. I'd... get him some place secure pretty quick. Maybe a little more secure than last time? Just sayin'.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Very generous of you.

Phil Coulson:
Like I told you before, General, we're the good guys. So, how about we make a deal? S.H.I.E.L.D. will keep dropping off presents like this. You keep getting promoted. All we ask for in return is a little breathing room. Sound good?

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
[laughing, pointing his finger at Coulson] You... you must have some big brass ones, Coulson. Coming out here by yourself to meet me. Face to face. No backup.

[Makes a macho sound in his throat. Coulson just smiles]

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Let's face facts. You and your little band of misfits are hardly S.H.I.E.L.D. Our intel says you don't have enough man power or artillery to take down a convenience store. So, I'm sorry, I'm gonna hafta to say no to that deal.

Phil Coulson:
I don't know. I think we're good on artillery.

[Looks up. The Quinn jet decloaks just above them]

Phil Coulson:
In case you get any ideas, General. That's just the tip of the iceberg.

[Walking towards another jet decloaking on the ground, under his breath]

Phil Coulson:
Let's get out of here before the iceberg runs out of fuel.

Skye:
The item that messed up Hartley's arm, it had those weird symbols on it, the ones you've had me researching.

Phil Coulson:
The same symbols? You sure?

Skye:
Yes. [In Coulson's office] They came up out of the object. It reminded me of Braille. It was like Hartley triggered something by touching it. What the hell is that thing?

Phil Coulson:
I have no idea. But good work.

Skye:
"Good work"? How about, "holy crap, Skye. We got to get on that"?

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Sierra Leone, three years ago. Ring a bell? How about Basra, '08? Operation Panther's claw? Come on, lieutenant. Tell me the stories are true.

Lance Hunter:
I'm not a lieutenant anymore, sir.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Merits for basket weaving, pottery. Don't forget those.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
I'm just trying to figure out how a guy like you, one of the SAS's finest, winds up running with a bunch of mouth-breathing mercs.

Lance Hunter:
Why does any man do anything, general? I met a girl.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
You like talking to yourself. That's cool. A lot of people do. You know, I like singing in the shower. Yeah, I know it's not really the same thing, but I wouldn't want anyone to hear it.

Raina:
My name is Raina, and I'm a huge admirer of yours... and your gifts.

Carl Creel:
Beat it, lady. I'm not into groupies.

Raina:
You misunderstand. I know you recently acquired something extremely precious and rare... something I'm very interested in.

Carl Creel:
Whatever you're offering... it ain't enough.

Raina:
Maybe not. But aren't you the least bit curious as to what it might be?

Skye:
You remember that encrypted Hydra frequency we shut down? Well, it's back up.

Phil Coulson:
Someone sent a message.

Skye:
A message for us with a phone number to call.

Melinda May:
Yeah, could be Creel.

Antoine Triplett:
Creel? A phone number? What, is he lonely?

Skye:
I doubt it. The guy is jacked. And he can turn any body part into any material.

Phil Coulson:
Okay. Thank you for that.

Phil Coulson:
What do you want, Raina?

Raina:
It's what I don't want, which is the Obelisk falling into the hands of people who don't understand it. I'm thinking you might.

Phil Coulson:
And I'm thinking you're gonna tell me why.

Raina:
John Garrett understood it. The moment he was injected with the same drug that saved you, he had visions. He started carving those visions on the walls.

Phil Coulson:
Garrett was a madman.

Raina:
Garrett was enlightened. He witnessed our fate... what we'd become. Have you?

Lance Hunter:
You need warm bodies. Is that it?

Phil Coulson:
I need skilled assets in the field who are willing to step over the line, to do the wrong thing but for the right reason. I need you because I can't be you. Not anymore.

Melinda May:
May: What is wrong with you? You're director now, not some level 1 field agent.

Phil Coulson:
There are no levels anymore. I got rid of those.

Calvin Zabo:
[Regarding the obelisk] Pick it up.

Raina:
You... You want me...

Calvin Zabo:
I need to know. So do you. Pick it up.

Raina:
[Raina tentatively reaches for the obelisk and lifts it. It glows, showing various inscriptions] It worked.

Calvin Zabo:
No. It let you live. There's a difference.

Raina:
Show me. Please.

Calvin Zabo:
Bring me my daughter, and I'll show the both of you.

Phil Coulson:
This new aircraft can stay in the air much longer than the old plane. Days, really. So, rapid response anywhere is...

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
You *love* your new toy, don't you?

Phil Coulson:
I very much love my new toy.

Phil Coulson:
Mack, you should head downstairs, assist Skye with intake.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Daisy.

Phil Coulson:
Dammit. Hard for us to get used to, huh?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[He and Hunter shake their heads] No. Just you.

Leo Fitz:
Okay, listen, because I'm only gonna say this once. I've already lost a friend. And it may sound strange, but to get her back I need to understand the properties of an ancient monolith. Now, I've learned it was buried in the Yucatan after being dragged around the Earth for a few hundred years. And originally found where there were artifacts, mostly worthless, except one. A scroll casing over a thousand years old. The casing holds a parchment which reportedly describes exactly what this monolith is, which is I want to know. Now, I tracked this scroll casing - not easy - through history to the Mosul Central Museum in Iraq, where it was taken by your extremist buddies when they ransacked the place this year. And, I'm ninety percent sure it's in this room. So. You can either hand it over in exchange for what's in there, or you can spill my guts in the sand and use the briefcase as a booster seat. [Heavy sigh followed by a nervous clearing of his throat] Totally your call.

Rosalind Price:
The laws of nature have changed. And until the laws of man change to reflect that, we can only do what we feel is right.

Phil Coulson:
I agree... I think.

Phil Coulson:
Wait. Is this still cagey banter, or are we being honest all of a sudden?

Daisy 'Skye' Johnson:
We'll hafta to hit this thing with everything we've got.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I need a bigger gun, I guess. Or, my axe. Maybe a shotgun/axe combination of some sort.

Phil Coulson:
[Fitz has just opened the casing and removed the scroll] Should we scan it? See if the computer can decipher what the...

Leo Fitz:
It's Hebrew. It's just one word.

Phil Coulson:
What does it mean?

Leo Fitz:
Death.

Phil Coulson:
May took off on vacation, and never came back, so I lost my right hand, too.

Leo Fitz:
[to Skye] Things change. That's what I'm saying. So maybe if you can learn how to control this, then... you could have Avenger-level powers, something like Captain America, even.

Jemma Simmons:
I think it best we keep in mind the unstable natures of Skye's power. If there is an Avenger equivalent, right now I'm afraid it's The Hulk.

Leo Fitz:
Well, Hulk, saved the world, last I checked.

Phil Coulson:
You and I need to take a ride.

Skye:
Okay. But why am suddenly feeling like Old Yeller right now?

Phil Coulson:
Kind of surprised you know the reference.

Skye:
I've had a lot of downtime lately. That and Fitz really wants a dog.

Phil Coulson:
Thought he wanted a monkey.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
If you see me some place I'm not supposed to be, I'm not there!

Lance Hunter:
So that's what this is about; you guys don't want Coulson in charge. I'll be the first to admit the guy's not perfect. Sometimes chews with his mouth open, tends to hog the mic on karaoke night. But other than that, he's not so bad really.

Grant Ward:
Do you believe I'm telling you the truth?

Skye:
[Nods] I just don't know why. I don't know what you hope to achieve by it.

Grant Ward:
I don't hope for me. I hope for you.

[pause]

Grant Ward:
I know something, and I want you to believe me when I say it.

[Stands up and walks towards her]

Grant Ward:
Your father is alive. He's looking for you. And some day, if you let me, I'll take you to him.

Phil Coulson:
What am I hearing?

Lance Hunter:
Agent May shot me.

Phil Coulson:
Repeat?

Lance Hunter:
May shot me.

Antoine Triplett:
Man, I wanted to be the one.

Daniel Whitehall:
I believe in second chances. I want us to work together. I want you to become a valued member of our organization. Surrender... and you will find meaning. Surrender... and you will find release. Take a deep breath. Calm your mind. You know what's best. What's best is you comply. Compliance will be rewarded. Are you ready to comply, Agent 33?

Agent 33:
I will never work for Hydra!

Daniel Whitehall:
I expected it would be a long night. Why I decided to treat myself.

Kenneth Turgeon:
Ms. Simmons, I need everything you have on the samples you're working on.

Jemma Simmons:
I'm not done. I'm testing a second set of dn...

Kenneth Turgeon:
Right. Just whatever you have.

Jemma Simmons:
What I have is more questions than answers.

Kenneth Turgeon:
Okay, know what? I get it. You don't have time. Neither do I. The time tables have moved up, and I have been called upstairs to fill them in. No prep time, no powerpoint, just me, pants around my ankles, talking out of my butt.

Jemma Simmons:
If you want, I could accompany you, present my analysis...

Kenneth Turgeon:
Oh, no, y-you don't want to go up there. The higher you go... the scarier it is.

Elias:
I thought that was broken for good. You clearly have a gift.

Donnie Gill:
A degree.

Phil Coulson:
Did you think I wouldn't find out? [Opens her fridge] Sriracha? Beer? That's all? What kind of diet is that?

Jemma Simmons:
Well, I also have tea. And if my diet's such a concern, then perhaps dead drops shouldn't involve fast food.

Phil Coulson:
We'll revisit that protocol.

Skye:
[after practicing at the shooting range] I imagined they were all Ward.

Melinda May:
Imagine they're all targets. Don't get cocky. This is step one.

Melinda May:
It's all about...

Melinda May, Skye:
Control.

Skye:
I know.

Melinda May, Skye:
Over your mind, your body.

Melinda May:
In the field, you need to maintain control. Whatever the situation... hostages, bombs about to go off...

Skye:
So, what you're saying is what I just did was puny and sad.

Melinda May:
[Checks monitor on Skye's wrist] 61 beats per minute. Consistent the whole time. Not that puny

Jemma Simmons:
Do you remember Donnie Gill?

Phil Coulson:
I mean, I knew he was a gifted scientist, but you're saying he's... a *gifted* scientist.

Grant Ward:
Hydra's protocol on gifteds is pretty straightforward. An acquisition team is sent out to convince or capture the gifted. If those two options aren't possible, then they'll take them out.

Skye:
Even if the gifted doesn't pose a threat?

Grant Ward:
A gifted that refuses Hydra is a threat. And threats are taken care of quickly.

Skye:
That's the difference between S.H.I.E.L.D. and Hydra.

Grant Ward:
And that's why Hydra will win. Because while a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent is considering right and wrong, Hydra's already taken the shot.

Sunil Bakshi:
Let's discuss your previous employer. Why did you join S.H.I.E.L.D. in the first place?

Jemma Simmons:
I was a 17-year-old girl with two Phds and a million questions. S.H.I.E.L.D. had the resources to help me answer them. Now they don't, and Hydra does.

Sunil Bakshi:
So your loyalties are with us?

Jemma Simmons:
My loyalties are with science. So long as Hydra allows me to do the work I want to be doing, then, yes, my loyalties are with Hydra.

Sunil Bakshi:
Well, loyalties can be tested.

Phil Coulson:
Maribel del Mar. Anchored in the port of Casablanca. It's a privately owned cargo ship. Supposed to cast off this morning but didn't. It's frozen in ice.

Antoine Triplett:
Iceberg in the middle east? Gill's not subtle.

Ship's Captain:
You have no idea what you are bringing down on yourself. We will find you.

Donnie Gill:
I know. I want to be left alone, but you people won't stop coming after me! So I'm done hiding. It's time Hydra learned once and for all. I'm not interested. I'm not afraid... [Freezes the Captain] I'm pissed off!

Lance Hunter:
[about to parachute out of the plane] Your first jump?

Skye:
Second. First was with Coulson and Lola. It's a car. It flies... [Gets blank look] Yeah, this is my first.

Lance Hunter:
Skye, you cover the door.

Skye:
You don't give the orders, Trainspotting.

Lance Hunter:
I'm not Scottish!

Sunil Bakshi:
[Going to apprehend Donnie] I'll be listening to everything. You run into any trouble, I'll be in your ear, talking you through it.

Jemma Simmons:
And what if he doesn't respond well?

Sunil Bakshi:
Then I suppose there'll be a job opening at our laboratory.

Lance Hunter:
[Helping Skye to prep her jump suit] Your first jump?

Skye:
Second. The first was with Coulson and Lola. [At his frown, she explains] The car. It... flies- yeah, this is my first.

Leo Fitz:
Is there anything more?

Phil Coulson:
That I'm keeping from you? Yeah. I'm Director. There's a helluva lot more.

Jemma Simmons:
Morning, Theo!

Theo:
That smile; a breath of sunshine in an otherwise dreary morning.

Jemma Simmons:
Oh, you're too sweet. And you mix your metaphors.

Lance Hunter:
Aliens. I pine for the days where we didn't have to fight bloody aliens. It's just not a fair fight.

Bobbi Morse:
Let's see if we can even the playing field.

Lance Hunter:
Really? Your batons? That's your game changer?

Grant Ward:
[to Dr. Garner] May thinks I'm a monster, but you actually become one. Guess we know her type.

Eva Belyakov:
I've had their pain. Now give me yours.

Melinda May:
Come on. I've got plenty to share.

Phil Coulson:
If I come out, will you shoot me? 'Cause then I won't come out.

Colonel Glenn Talbot:
Hold your fire, soldiers.

Phil Coulson:
This is one of the most classified facilities on the planet, colonel. How the hell did you find it?

Maria Hill:
I told them.

Maria Hill:
Wow. I can't believe he shot Lola.

Phil Coulson:
I can't talk about it.

Skye:
Thought you didn't eat junk food.

Antoine Triplett:
I'm on vacation.

Skye:
Until...?

Antoine Triplett:
Until that man tells me it's time to work.

Phil Coulson:
Not tonight. Live a little.

Antoine Triplett:
That case, I'm gonna go crazy. Maybe have another bag.

Jemma Simmons:
I wish this bunker had a bunker.

Grant Ward:
Maria Hill. I kind of hoped you went down with the Triskelion.

Maria Hill:
And I kind of hoped you weren't the duplicitous lowlife you turned out to be, but here we are.

Grant Ward:
Do you - do you think this has been easy on me? Do you have any idea how hard it was? The sacrifices, the decisions I had to make? But I made them. Because that's what I do. I'm a survivor.

Skye:
You are a *serial killer*.

Maria Hill:
Yeah, it went as expected. SHIELD implodes, and everyone wants answers. The CIA, NSA, NRO them I can handle. But Congress? Congress is like kindergarten. "Where is this Fridge?" "What was in there?" "Who or what is a man-thing?" I swear I need a cocktail and a lobotomy.

Jemma Simmons:
We just have to stay positive.

Leo Fitz:
For Coulson, yeah. I know.

Jemma Simmons:
He's had a rough go of it.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah.

Jemma Simmons:
Between Garrett and May and seeing Audrey and - pancakes!

Leo Fitz:
Coulson's upset about pancakes now?

Phil Coulson:
Our plane is in Los Angeles. Finally, some good news. [alarms start blaring]

Computer:
Perimeter defenses activated.

Phil Coulson:
I should have knocked on wood just then.

Skye:
All this time, everything we've been through why? How could you?

Grant Ward:
I was on a mission. It wasn't personal.

Skye:
"It was - " you did not just say that. "It wasn't personal"?

Grant Ward:
Skye, listen to me...

Skye:
God, you might actually believe that.That - that is the twisted logic that they teach you when you sign up to be a *Nazi*.

Grant Ward:
Stop. Wait. I'm not a Nazi.

Skye:
Yes, you are. That is exactly what you are. It's in the SHIELD handbook, chapter one. The Red Skull, founder of Hydra, was a big, fat, freaking Nazi.

Grant Ward:
That has nothing to do with today.

Skye:
You know, you always had that Hitler Youth look to you. So it's really not that surprising.

Maria Hill:
You know, I never liked you, Ward, not since our first sit-down, but I never figured you for John Garrett's lapdog.

Grant Ward:
A lot of us lost respect for Fury when he picked you as his second. If he needed eye candy around, he could have at least picked Romanoff.

Maria Hill:
That's funny. I'll tell her you said that.

Phil Coulson:
We need to move. We got to take the cockpit.

Skye:
Wait. You came alone?

Phil Coulson:
It's okay. I can take Ward.

Skye:
No, I know, but how did you get past Deathlok?

Phil Coulson:
Deathlok's here? On the plane?

Skye:
Yeah, you didn't take him out?

Phil Coulson:
[See him behind them] New plan: Run!

Leo Fitz:
Tell me that you're not Hydra.

Jemma Simmons:
What?

Leo Fitz:
I know that it's ridiculous, but I just need to hear you say it.

Jemma Simmons:
I'm not Hydra.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, good. Good, 'cause I'm not either.

Jemma Simmons:
Of course not.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah. 'Cause if you ever did...

Jemma Simmons:
I wouldn't...

Leo Fitz:
I don't know what I would do.

Jemma Simmons:
You'll never have to find out.

Antoine Triplett:
We're not Hydra. We're agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Colonel Glenn Talbot:
Well, right now, to the rest of the world, that's the same thing.

Skye:
You think I don't want to watch him suffer?

Mike Peterson:
Not suffer. *Die*. Garrett doesn't think you're gonna let that happen.

Skye:
He's a murderer.

Mike Peterson:
Yes, he is. Are you?

Skye:
[Talking about Garrett] Think about all that time he spent as your S.O., getting to know you, being your mentor only to lie to your face, betray you like that.

Grant Ward:
It was, uh, difficult to accept. But thankfully, that's over.

Skye:
Because you took care of him.

Grant Ward:
Can we not discuss this right now?

Skye:
If you had one more moment before you shot him in the back of the head so heroically, if he was sitting right here and you could say anything you want, what would you say?

Grant Ward:
Skye...

Skye:
Would you say he's disgusting? Would you tell him he's a disgusting, backstabbing traitor? Or to rot in hell?

Grant Ward:
What are you doing?

Skye:
I'm just trying to have an honest conversation for once.

Bobbi Morse:
Got to get you a gun one of these days.

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
Save my bullets for the real fight.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
What's the plan? What are you even doing here?

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
Fury left us orders.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
To do what?

Bobbi Morse:
To save S.H.I.E.L.D.

Bobbi Morse:
I work for S.H.I.E.L.D. I do. I swear. But you don't.

Melinda May:
Try again.

Bobbi Morse:
What Coulson's doing here, this isn't S.H.I.E.L.D - not the real S.H.I.E.L.D., anyway.

Melinda May:
The last person who betrayed me - I broke his larynx. Hand that over.

Melinda May:
They know all of our protocols. We handed Mack the schematics of our base.

Phil Coulson:
They don't know everything about this place - not like we do.

Melinda May:
She said she was working for S.H.I.E.L.D., Phil. The *real* S.H.I.E.L.D.

Phil Coulson:
What the hell does that mean?

Gordon:
What does it feel like, your gift?

Skye:
I don't know. Um... It's intense. Like 1,000 bees trapped inside of me. And I feel it all the time. It's always there. And I can't stop it.

Gordon:
Why would you want to stop it?

Skye:
Because I destroy everything around me.

Gordon:
That is simply not true. Every object in this universe gives off a vibration. Did you know that? Nothing rests. Animals, trees, people, even this ratty couch. And you - you have the ability to tap into those vibrations. Don't you see? You can become magnificent. But something's inhibiting you, constraining your energy.

Skye:
Uh, no. No, no. My, um - my friend's a scientist. She made these to protect me.

Gordon:
Or do they protect people from you?

Skye:
No, it's not like that. My powers, I-I can't control them. And when I try to, it hurts me.

Gordon:
Most gifts come with a price, but you could learn to manage it. I apologize. I'm saying too much. This is probably not the best place to continue our conversation. You don't have the tools and the understanding that you need just yet.

Skye:
To do what?

Gordon:
To be who you were always meant to be. Without fear, without pain. We can offer that to you.

Skye:
How?

Gordon:
I'll take you to a place where you can be with people like us.

Skye:
Us? How many are there?

Gordon:
You can learn about yourself, your gift. You can be safe. But only if you want to come. When you're ready, I'll find you.

Robert Gonzales:
I was wrong that day. We followed Fury's orders, hundreds of men and women who devoted their lives to this organization would be dead. If I had been the man in charge, they'd all be lost.

Phil Coulson:
So now you all operate as what? Five friendly faces who agree on everything? I don't see the other four here talking to me - just you.

Robert Gonzales:
I have no desire to be the director.

Phil Coulson:
You think I *did*? Fury chose me.

Robert Gonzales:
*He* made you. You're literally his creation. He thought of himself as some sort of king who made damn sure he had an heir to the throne. Try and remember Project Insight was Fury's idea. Secrets is what brought S.H.I.E.L.D. down the first time, and we won't let that happen again.

Phil Coulson:
If you wanted to talk to me, Agent Gonzales, you should have talked to me. You put spies on my team, invaded my base, hurt my people. Fury's secrets didn't bring down S.H.I.E.L.D., Hydra did.

Robert Gonzales:
I wonder if you really believe that.

Phil Coulson:
You really think they're gonna help you?

Robert Gonzales:
Every member of your team is a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. We'll let them make their own decisions.

[May shoots Gonzalez with an Icer]

Melinda May:
Already made mine.

Phil Coulson:
That's really a nice entrance.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
The most dangerous kind of pain is the kind you can't feel.

Robert Gonzales:
Nice office. Lots of light.

Phil Coulson:
You haven't even delved into the record collection.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
You were right. For a while there, it all went to hell. It was bad. But now Bobbi and I work for an organization, an outlier that came out of the wreckage from what Fury left.

Lance Hunter:
What organization, Mack? Who the hell are you working for?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
S.H.I.E.L.D. The real S.H.I.E.L.D.

Dr. Andrew Garner:
I haven't worked with S.H.I.E.L.D. in a long while. I moved on for a reason.

Melinda May:
It's a different S.H.I.E.L.D., Coulson's the director now.

Dr. Andrew Garner:
Okay, but why me? Is this Skye that bad?

Melinda May:
She's that good. A good agent.

Skye:
Tell me about the wedding. I'm thinking May could go either way... understated or full bridezilla. She can be a control freak.

Dr. Andrew Garner:
I'm not here to discuss my ex.

Skye:
Did you guys have actual conversations? You know, like, pillow talk, or was it just pillow stern looks?

Dr. Andrew Garner:
[about Skye] She thinks the world of you.

Melinda May:
Well, I taught her how to fire an automatic. Of course she likes me.

Phil Coulson:
Don't EVER tell me there's no way!

Leo Fitz:
[to Agent Ward] One of Coulson's old S.H.I.E.L.D. collectibles. Flamethrowers, world's first GPS. He's made for this crap.

Phil Coulson:
[to the SHIELD C-17 loadmaster regarding his classic Corvette] Don't touch Lola.

Leo Fitz:
And he calls it a girl's name.

Phil Coulson:
Lola's not just a collectible, you know. People tend to confuse the words "new" and "improved."

Maria Hill:
What does S.H.I.E.L.D. stand for, Agent Ward?

Grant Ward:
Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division.

Maria Hill:
And what does that mean to you?

Grant Ward:
It means someone really wanted our initials to spell out "shield." It means we're the line between the world and the much weirder world. We protect people from news they aren't ready to hear. And when we can't do that, we keep them safe.

Grant Ward:
There are two ways we can do this.

Skye:
Oh, is one of them the easy way?

Grant Ward:
No.

Skye:
Oh.

Grant Ward:
Something turns up like this Chitauri neural link... we get to it before someone bad does.

Maria Hill:
Any idea who Vanchat was planning to sell it to?

Grant Ward:
I'm more interested how this Rising Tide group found out about it. I thought they were just hackers. What changed?

Maria Hill:
Everything's changing. A little while ago, most people went to bed thinking that the craziest thing in the world was a billionaire in a flying metal suit. Then aliens invade New York then were beaten back by among others, a giant green monster, a costumed hero from the 40's, and a God.

Grant Ward:
I don't think Thor's technically a God.

Maria Hill:
Well, you haven't been near his arms.

Maria Hill:
The battle of the New York was the end of the world. This - now - is the new world. People are different. They have access to tech, to formula, secrets they're not ready for.

Grant Ward:
Why was I pulled out of Paris?

Maria Hill:
That, you have to ask Agent Coulson.

Grant Ward:
Uh, yeah. I'm clearance Level Six. I know that... Agent Coulson was killed in action before the battle of New York. Got the full report.

Phil Coulson:
[walks out of the dark] Welcome to Level Seven. [Normal voice] Sorry, that corner was really dark, I couldn't help myself. I think there's a bulb out.

Grant Ward:
Director Fury faked your death - to motivate the Avengers.

Maria Hill:
Well, the death of a common ally is a particulary team builder.

Phil Coulson:
Plus, it wasn't much of a stretch. I stopped breathing for about 40 seconds.

Maria Hill:
Eight. It gets longer every time you tell it.

Phil Coulson:
Yeah, well, you get shanked by the Asgardian Mussolini, you can tell it your way. I was looking at the big white light, and it felt a lot longer than eight seconds.

Grant Ward:
Do they know? The Avengers - that Fury played them?

Maria Hill:
They're not Level Seven.

Phil Coulson:
Got of the I.C.U., Fury stuck me in a grass shack in Tahiti. Rough gig. Mai Tais, Travis McGee novels, and a physical therapist whose command of English was... irrelevant.

Phil Coulson:
Agent Hill did a very detailed assessment of your last three missions. Combat, top grades. Espionage, she gave you the highest marks since Romanoff. Under people skills she drew a... I think it's a little poop, with knives sticking out of it.

Grant Ward:
WHAT?

Phil Coulson:
That's bad right?

Maria Hill:
[after Ward leaves] It was a porcupine. It was not a poop. It just means he...

Phil Coulson:
No, I'm pretty sure... [Looks at the book]

Dr. Streiten:
I would have been very happy not to clear you, Phil. I'd love for you to rest up some more.

Phil Coulson:
I've had plenty of that. Thanks.

Maria Hill:
You sure?

Phil Coulson:
You should go sometime.

Maria Hill:
Where?

Phil Coulson:
Tahiti. It's a magical place.

Maria Hill:
Three days in, I'd be begging for an assignment.

Phil Coulson:
Exactly. [Coulson leaves]

Dr. Streiten:
Tahiti. He really doesn't know does he?

Maria Hill:
He can never know.

Melinda May:
I'm not going back in the field.

Phil Coulson:
Yeah. You've got such a nice setup here. You ever thought about adding a moat? I just need you to drive the bus, liase ground transpo, some on-site supervision. This isn't a combat op.

Melinda May:
Then you don't need me.

Phil Coulson:
I do. 'Cause we'll be running ourselves. Picking the ops... making the calls. No red tape. This is where they actually make the red tape, isn't it? I always wondered. Melinda.

Melinda May:
You're really just asking me to drive the bus?

Phil Coulson:
I'm not asking. But it's a really nice bus.

Jemma Simmons:
So, are you excited to be coming on our journey into mystery?

Grant Ward:
It's like Christmas.

Skye:
You seem nervous Agent Ward.

Grant Ward:
I'm calling to mind my training. There's no way I'm gonna reveal classified secrets to a girl who's hell-bent on taking us down.

Skye:
Have you ever killed anyone?

Grant Ward:
Yes, a few. High-risk targets. But they were terrible people who were trying to murder nice people. And I didn't feel good afterwards.

Skye:
And does your grandmother know about these things?

Grant Ward:
[voice breaking] Gramzy?

Mike Peterson:
You said if we worked hard, if we did right, we'd have a place. You said it was enough to be a man but there's better then man! There's gods... and the rest of us? What are we? They're giants... we're what they step on.

Phil Coulson:
I know. I've seen giants, up close, and that privilege cost me, nearly everything. But the good ones, the real deal? They're not heroes because of what they have that we don't, it's what they do with it. You're right, Mike, it matters who you are.

Mike Peterson:
I could, you know? Be a hero.

Phil Coulson:
I'm counting on it.

Grant Ward:
[Watching video of the lab bombing] What are we seeing?

Leo Fitz:
Well, uh, the man is angry... at the other man...

Dumont:
Ward, just a heads-up. We have possible hostiles in your vicinity.

Grant Ward:
[Already fighting them] REALLY?

Leo Fitz:
And, with a little luck, get some images from before the blast. And by "luck," I mean "unappreciated genius."

Skye:
[Voice over] The secret is out. For decades, your organization stayed in the shadows, hiding the truth, but now we know-they're among us. Heroes... and monsters. The world is full of wonders... We can't explain everything we see. But our eyes are open. So what now? There are no more shadows for you to hide in. Something impossible just happened. What are you going to do about it?

Skye:
[Voice over] How will you come at us? From the air? From the ground? How will you silence us this time? How can you? The truth is in the wind. It's everywhere. You cannot stop the rising tide. You will not find us. You will never see our faces but rest assures-we will rise against those who shield us from the truth. [See Skye in her van] And nothing - nothing can stop us in the... [Coulson and Grant break in] Hey. What up?

Phil Coulson:
She's an asset.

Grant Ward:
She is such an... wait, "asset"?

Grant Ward:
She's a groupie. All this hacking into SHIELD, tracking powers - She might as well be one of those sweaty Cosplay girls crowding around Stark tower.

Skye:
What? I would - It was just one time.

Phil Coulson:
[In Skye's interrogation] This is QNB-T16. It's the top-shelf martini of sodium pentothal derivatives. It's a brand-new and extremely potent truth drug. Don't worry. The effects only last about an hour.

Grant Ward:
And you'll have a nice little nap. And we'll have all the answers to our...

[Coulson injects Ward]

Grant Ward:
Hey! What the hell?

Phil Coulson:
I'm sorry. Did that hurt?

Grant Ward:
No, you've lost your mind. You should never do that to a member of your team. And yes, it did hurt a little bit, but I try to mask my pain in front of a beautiful woman, it makes me seem more masculine. MY GOD this stuff works fast.

Phil Coulson:
[to Skye] Don't trust us? Ask him whatever you'd like.

Grant Ward:
Wait a minute. Wait. You can't just... [Coulson opens the door and leaves; as Ward shouts after him] This is definitely not protocol!

Leo Fitz:
Whoa whoa whoa! Watch it! That's the night-night gun.

Jemma Simmons:
Well it's on my stuff and it doesn't work and there's no way we're calling it the night-night gun.

Leo Fitz:
The bullets work. Non-lethal, heavy stopping power, break up under the sub-cutaneous tissue...

Jemma Simmons:
Oh, with a dose of only .1 microliters of dendrotoxin. I'm not Hermione. I can't create instant paralysis with that.

Skye:
You're in danger.

Mike Peterson:
What do you mean danger?

Skye:
S.H.I.E.L.D.

Mike Peterson:
[Confused] Shield what? I should carry a shield?

Skye:
S.H.I.E.L.D. Government. Scary men in dark suits who come after guys like you.

Phil Coulson:
Hey. Did you hear the one about the guy who's afraid of flying?

Grant Ward:
[Absolute seriousness] I've done a night jump into a drop zone under heavy fire sir. I can handle it.

Phil Coulson:
That was a... joke. The first part of a... I'm not gonna tell it now.

Skye:
[Coming up to Mike in a diner] Just act natural.

Mike Peterson:
What?

Skye:
Just pretend that we're talking.

Mike Peterson:
We *are*.

Skye:
Good. 'Cause you never know who's listening.

Mike Peterson:
I don't even know who's *talking*.

Dumont:
Ward there's been a development. It's the Rising Tide. They've pinned down the location of the package. We need to abort.

Grant Ward:
I'm five minutes away from retrieving it.

Dumont:
So is everyone *else*.

Skye:
Centipede... it was chatter on the web and then gone. I traced the access-point MAC address to that building.

Grant Ward:
What were you after?

Skye:
The truth. What are *you* after?

Grant Ward:
[Sarcastic] World peace.

Debbie:
You said you could keep it together. Our first subject lost it... walked into the lab with a fricking bomb.

Mike Peterson:
[Indignant] I'm not like him.

Debbie:
Well, tell that to your foreman in the I.C.U.

Mike Peterson:
I saved you!

Debbie:
You *exposed* me! You exposed the program. [Exhales sharply] The people who gave me this technology... they are very serious and they do not want to be revealed. Mike Peterson needs to disappear.

Mike Peterson:
[Thoughtful] You're right. I'm not him anymore. I'm someone else now.

Debbie:
Oh please. You're juiced Mike. And you're losing it just like the last guy. [sighs] This is a disaster.

Mike Peterson:
No. It's an Origin Story.

Grant Ward:
Look at this place. You're gonna risk thousands of lives over some nobody.

Phil Coulson:
[Cheerily] Nobody's nobody Ward.

Phil Coulson:
Have you thought about the offer?

Skye:
Hitching a ride on the crazy plane? I'm not exactly a team player.

Phil Coulson:
We're not exactly a team. But we're in a position to do some good. You'd be a great help. And you'd be front row center at the strangest show on earth. Which is after all what you wanted.

Skye:
I was able to hack S.H.I.E.L.D. from my van. You're gonna show me something new?

Phil Coulson:
[Phone rings, answers] Go.

Grant Ward:
Sir, we've got an 801.

Phil Coulson:
Is that confirmed?

Grant Ward:
They want *us* to go in and confirm it.

Phil Coulson:
What's an 801?

Phil Coulson:
[Starts car] You've got exactly 10 minutes to decide if you really want to know.

Skye:
There's no way we can make it to the airfield in [See Lola is now hovering above the ground]... 10 minutes.

Phil Coulson:
The tide is rising.

Mike Peterson:
You and me. What are we?

Ace Peterson:
We're a Team.

Skye:
With great power comes a... ton of weird crap that you are not prepared to deal with!

Phil Coulson:
Find everything you can on our team - all personal records, photos, anything that proves we exist - then erase it.

Skye:
Uh, that's kind of the nuclear option.

Phil Coulson:
It's *our* only option. Every government agency in the world will be on our ass. We need to vanish.

Skye:
Okay. But... once that's done, it can't be undone. We'll be ghosts. Not agents of S.H.I.E.l.D., just agents of... nothing.

Skye:
And when I see you next, who you gonna be? You got a clean slate. You can be anyone you want.

Grant Ward:
I don't know. Maybe... Tom Brady. I always wanted to play quarterback.

Skye:
And date supermodels. You are so predictable.

Grant Ward:
No, I mean the guy seems to have things pretty worked out.

John Garrett:
Tom Brady? You hate the Patriots.

Grant Ward:
The Agent Grant Ward she knows doesn't.

Agent Kaminsky:
Hail Hydra!

John Garrett:
All right, all right, put your arms down, Kaminsky. You look like a West Texas cheerleader at a pep rally.

Ian Quinn:
You. You have to be kidding me. I've been in a cell smaller than my shoe closet. I wasn't allowed to eat with a fork, which would have been worse if I'd been allowed to eat anything but meatloaf!

Raina:
So you're a liar. You're a fraud.

John Garrett:
An artist. A con artist, perhaps, but an artist all the same.

Phil Coulson:
What's with the windows?

Eric Koenig:
Supposed to make the isolation more bearable. Every day of the week, different view. Wednesday's pretty terrific if you like topless beaches.

Phil Coulson:
Skye, please, tell me something good.

Skye:
We have Internet.

Phil Coulson:
Yay. And, boy, have I lowered my expectations.

Phil Coulson:
There's got to be something here! This means something! This has to mean something. The world needs us! HYDRA is out there. We cannot let them win! We cannot let them define us! Do you understand that? We are not agents of nothing, we are agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and that still carries weight! It has to carry weight. After everything we've been through, that carries weight!

Eric Koenig:
[to Coulson] Very soon you're going to be issued your very own lanyard. Lanyards for others will be distributed on a case by case basis.

Jemma Simmons:
Well, at least we still have each other.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah, good. 'Cause the last thing I want is for things to change.

Jemma Simmons:
Fitz, it's too late for that.

Melinda May:
You okay?

Phil Coulson:
Tell you what - let's skip the part where you act concerned about my well-being. What is it you want?

Antoine Triplett:
He saved our asses back at the Hub, but I'm telling you he's chasing the white whale.

Leo Fitz:
Have you even read Moby Dick?

Antoine Triplett:
Yeah, have you?

Leo Fitz:
That's not the point.

Phil Coulson:
This means something. This has to mean something. The world need needs us. Hydra is out there. We cannot let them win, we cannot let them define us. Do you understand that. We are not Agents of Nothing, we are Agents of Shield, and that still carries weight!

Ian Quinn:
Do you know what my life was like before I met you? It was really *nice*. But because of you, I've had my assets frozen, I've been beaten. You almost ripped my tongue out of my mouth!

John Garrett:
But I didn't. I'm regretting that now.

Phil Coulson:
[to May] I'm not going to hand over my weapon. You wanna try to take it from me?... Good. Now get out of my office.

Leo Fitz:
I won't give up. I can't give up.

Skye:
So, you think the rock is a portal?

Leo Fitz:
No. No, I'm *proving"* that it's a portal. Okay? To another planet. A, a very old planet. A crack in space/time that carried Simmons away, and carried the sand back. Which means...

Phil Coulson:
She's out there. But, it's been months.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah?

Phil Coulson:
She could be long gone from wherever this thing dropped her.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah.

Phil Coulson:
She could be dead.

Leo Fitz:
Yes.

Phil Coulson:
But, we're gonna find out. Aren't we?

Bobbi Morse:
Yep.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Damn right.

Skye:
Yeah.

Phil Coulson:
Okay, Fitz. What do you need?

Leo Fitz:
Uh. Uh, well... More historical data. People have studied this thing for centuries. Um... An expert on quantum mechanics and Einstein-Rosen Bridge Theory. And, uh... a sandwich would be nice.

Phil Coulson:
I might have an idea... about the other things.

Professor Elliot Randolph:
Pretty crappy time to be on Earth if you're not a local, so... I am laying low.

Professor Elliot Randolph:
Why come to me? I'm no interstellar travel expert. I've never even studied gravitational lensing or zero point energy fields or quantum harmonic oscillation theory.

Bobbi Morse:
Yet you know all those words you just said.

Professor Elliot Randolph:
To the plane! [Excited, he starts walking away until he realizes they are still standing there just staring at him] Am I allowed to say that?

Phil Coulson:
Let's all... go to the plane, I guess.

Phil Coulson:
[Pointing out another warning on the wall] Here's another one. This is why I got rid of all the S.H.I.E.L.D. logos on our vehicles. It's like... screaming for attention.

Bobbi Morse:
You know... there's a ginormous eagle symbol on top of our jet.

Phil Coulson:
Yeah. Sometimes I can't help myself with the cool.

Melinda May:
Are you expecting company?

William May:
No. But, I'm not afraid of the prospect.

Phil Coulson:
If we were realistic, we never would have gotten this far.

Dr. Andrew Garner:
You know why most people take psyche, right? They're trying to figure out families.

Alexander Braun:
You got me there. You wouldn't believe how messed up mine is.

Bobbi Morse:
Who is Professor Randolph?

Phil Coulson:
This monolith has been studied for centuries. Well, Randolph's actually been on the planet for those centuries. And he's traveled through space in a portal. And he's also an alien, So, he's got a lot going for him.

Phil Coulson:
Skye, hey? Skye are you okay? Skye?

Skye:
It's Daisy.

Phil Coulson:
What?

Bobbi Morse:
It's Daisy now sir. You're really having a hard time with this huh?

Phil Coulson:
Damn it, yeah.

Skye:
You know, I never gave you enough credit for this whole zen-warrior thing. But I got to admit, it'd be nice to feel nothing right now.

Melinda May:
You think I don't feel anything?

Skye:
Look at you. You're a statue. And you and Ward had a thing. So if anyone should be furious...

Melinda May:
I'm furious. But I'm sure as hell not gonna waste it on a tantrum. I'm gonna mine it, save it... and when we find Ward, I'm gonna use every bit of it to take him down.

Skye:
Wish I knew how to use that hate-fu.

Phil Coulson:
We have no authority to do this. We're no longer S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. We're...

Leo Fitz:
We're vigilantes.

Phil Coulson:
I was gonna say, 'doing this because it's the right thing to do,' but... yeah.

Phil Coulson:
So if you're with me, I'm gonna finish what I started. I'll be damned if I'm going to let Garrett and Ward get away with murder. And I want my plane back.

Phil Coulson:
This is just about everything we've been dealing with. And this connects them all. Cybertek built Deathlok, shipped items to Quinn, who was working for the Clairvoyant, who turned out to be Garrett, who planted Ward on our bus because he wanted to know why I didn't stay dead. Should have drawn another chart for this part.

Phil Coulson:
Skye, Trip, get ready for a large file transfer.

Skye:
How large? [a filing cabinet comes crashing out the window]

Teenage Ward:
Why should I trust you?

John Garrett:
You shouldn't. Don't trust anybody, ever, especially me.

Grant Ward:
I could have crossed off that drug Lord without getting my picture taken. Single shot, half a mile away.

John Garrett:
You're missing the point. I didn't want to just cross him off. I wanted to make a spectacle. People are killed by guns every day in Bogota. But how often does a monster punch a drug Lord's head clean off? Hell, that's international news.

John Garrett:
[to Deathlok] Spectacular thing you did back there, Mikey. If I didn't know better, I'd swear you're starting to enjoy your job. You get the impression he's enjoying his job.

Grant Ward:
Somebody does.

John Garrett:
Well, I'd like to think we all enjoy our work. And why not? These are exciting times full of rewards.

Phil Coulson:
Oh, my God. Is that a handheld hypno-beam?

Antoine Triplett:
One of the original betas. See how it has the switch on the bottom?

Phil Coulson:
The production models moved it to the side. This is amazing. Almost as cool as...

Phil Coulson, Antoine Triplett:
Transistorized blast gun.

[both laugh]

Skye:
Ah, ha, ha. Okay. The two of you can get a room later, but we have a plane to catch.

Raina:
You're staring at me again.

Deathlok:
You gave them my son. All I see are pictures of him in a cell.

Raina:
I was following orders. Just like you.

Deathlok:
So, is someone playing God with you, too? Seeing everything you see? Waiting to push a button and blow a hole in your skull if you disobey? Is there?

Raina:
No.

Deathlok:
Then why are you here?

Raina:
For you and others like you - people with gifts. I'm waiting for what's inside to be revealed.

Ian Quinn:
[about his haircut] 5 bucks. That's it, huh?

Ernesto The Barber:
S?.

Ian Quinn:
Same thing cost me $30 in Rome.

John Garrett:
There it is - The face of our future. Mr. Quinn's the poster boy for our new enterprise.

Grant Ward:
Not sure how that's supposed to work. He's also an international fugitive, accused of a laundry list of crimes.

Ian Quinn:
Accused by S.H.I.E.L.D., of whom I've been a vocal critic for years. Now S.H.I.E.L.D.'s gone down in flames while I rise from the ashes, all charges dismissed and my sterling reputation restored.

John Garrett:
I knew there was a reason I didn't rip out that silver tongue of yours.

Grant Ward:
Skye's an orphan. Been looking for her parents for awhile. It's not exactly a secret.

Raina:
But that's what intrigued me. That and her DNA. It appears to be a match for someone I heard bout a long time ago.

Grant Ward:
You know something about Skye's history?

Raina:
I can't confirm it's her, but I did hear a story about a baby girl. Years ago, a village in the Hunan province in China. It destroyed, every man, woman, and child torn apart by monsters trying to find this baby.

Grant Ward:
Did the monster kill the baby's parents?

Raina:
No. That's whats so interesting. The baby's parents were the monsters.

Teenage Ward:
Give me one reason not to blow your head off.

John Garrett:
I brought tacos.

John Garrett:
[about Raina] Something about that woman unnerves me.

Grant Ward:
It's those eyes.

John Garrett:
No, it's what's behind those eyes.

John Garrett:
The quartermaster at your military school's an old buddy of mine. He told me about a pissed-off young cadet with off-the-chart eye-hand coordination who went awol, stole a car, drove over a thousand miles home only to try and burn the place down. I must say, I find a young man like that intriguing. I'm curious. Did you know your brother was in the house when you set it on fire?

Teenage Ward:
No, sir, I did not.

John Garrett:
I was a pyro as a kid, too. Ended up making a pretty good living at it. I'm here to make you a one-time offer, so listen up. Your family's lawyer's gonna be here in about 20 minutes. Not only are your folks pressing charges against you for arson and attempted murder, but your older brother's petitioning the court to have you tried as an adult. Now, you can spend the next few years locked up in a cage, blaming mommy and daddy and mean older brother for your problems, Or you can let me get you out of here and teach you how to be a man.

Reporter:
[On TV] Speculation continues as to whether this superhuman assassination was carried out by a man, monster, or machine.

Leo Fitz:
The correct answer is "D", all of the above. What the hell is Deathlok doing in Bogota?

Phil Coulson:
Trip was generous enough to offer up some of his granddad's spy tech to help us out, so we should systematically take a full inventory of ev... Oh, my god. Is that a handheld hypno-beam?

Ott:
We've seen one of these bullets before. What did they use it with?

Diaz:
The sleepy-sleep gun, I think.

Ott:
That's right. Our team took this rudimentary concept and converted it into an aerosol grenade. Much more useful.

Leo Fitz:
[Through Coulson's comm] But this is an icer!

Phil Coulson:
Yes, but this is an icer. Triple the stopping power and a much cooler... name.

Melinda May:
[Dressed as scientists] Does your sweater itch?

Phil Coulson:
A little bit.

John Garrett:
You remember when we first met? I told you I worked for a secret organization? Well, it's more like I work for a secret organization inside another secret organization. You ever heard of Hydra?

Leo Fitz:
I'm glad that I did it. You hear me? You lose, we win.

John Garrett:
You're dead.

Leo Fitz:
Well, no worse than you.

Leo Fitz:
I know you care about us, Ward.

Grant Ward:
You're right, I do. It's a weakness.

Phil Coulson:
We're on with the R&D department up at Cybertek's Palo Alto offices. [Fitz leans back in his chair, obviously concerned]

Skye:
It'll be okay, Fitz. No matter how deep they dig, they'll only find the new identities I've created.

Leo Fitz:
It's not that. It's the idea of giving them access to all of our designs.

Phil Coulson:
We're not actually giving them anything. We just need to get inside so we can plug Skye's flash drive into one of their computers. You don't have to go.

Leo Fitz:
It's not that either. It's Ward. What if Garrett put an exploding eye into him, to control him? Maybe that's why he betrayed us.

Skye:
I'm pretty sure there's a much simpler reason. He's evil.

Leo Fitz:
Well, I don't believe that people are born evil. Something must have happened.

Skye:
Just let me go in and talk to her, sir, as a friend.

Phil Coulson:
I can't let you do that. It's too dangerous.

Skye:
She's not dangerous. She's nice like, overly nice. She never misses a birthday post to her friends, runs the youth program at her church, rescues dogs. Hannah's a safety inspector not just because she's detail-oriented, but because she...

Phil Coulson:
She genuinely cares.

Skye:
Right. And someone with that much empathy being responsible for that much loss of life, she's devastated, spouting nonsense about god punishing her for...

Melinda May:
People believe what they need to believe to justify their actions.

Skye:
Is that how you justify your shoot-first policy? At least let me try to repair *that* damage.

Leo Fitz:
No! You do not touch that! Two semesters minimum of holographic engineering before you touch this!

Skye:
All right, All right. I get it. I didn't go to your stupid SHIELD Hogwarts or whatever. I'm gonna go upstairs. And I'm gonna do my own research on my computer. My boring, old, flat computer.

Phil Coulson:
I'll lose the tie. If she is telekinetic, I don't want to have a noose around my neck.

Melinda May:
I don't mean to scare you, I just need to use you as bait.

Hannah:
Well, that's comforting.

Skye:
A telekinetic? I thought they didn't exist.

Phil Coulson:
We never verified one. That's why we're going to Batesville to conduct an index asset evaluation and intake.

Skye:
Does that mean we talk to her and see if she has powers?

Phil Coulson:
Basically.

Skye:
Well that needs a better name. Less IRS, more... better. Something like "the welcome wagon".

Tobias:
I was trying to protect you from them, trying to atone from my sin. Hannah, please, maybe if you forgive me, I won't go to hell.

Hannah:
Only God can forgive you.

Melinda May:
And he won't. You can't undo what's been done. That will be with you forever. But trying to hold onto this life, clinging to the person you thought you could be - that's hell.

Grant Ward:
She used her Britishness against us!

Grant Ward:
That isn't a word in our language.

Jemma Simmons:
Our language? You mean the English language, first spoken in England?

Skye:
You can catch a lot more flies with honey than with napalm. Just saying.

Jemma Simmons:
There's no principal that would support Telekinesis.

Leo Fitz:
Not yet. We did believe for a bit, though, remember? Freshman year? When Sally Webber made the books fall off the table in neurobiology?

Jemma Simmons:
Oh, well, that was a particularly cruel prank.

Leo Fitz:
You screamed like a girl.

Jemma Simmons:
I am a girl!

Jemma Simmons:
All I can tell from these brain waves is that she's upset.

Skye:
You need a computer for that?

Phil Coulson:
This is a delicate situation. We don't know what kind of danger this woman poses, so I'll make initial contact with Agents Ward and May.

Skye:
It's a delicate situation, so you're bringing along warm *and* fuzzy?

Leo Fitz:
Things got out of hand. May sorted it out. She's the Cavalry.

Skye:
Where does that name come from, anyway?

Leo Fitz:
You don't know?

Jemma Simmons:
Didn't Ward tell you? [Skye shakes her hand] Of course not. You spent no time at the academy. It's quite a story.

Skye:
Yeah, well, Ward isn't exactly a chatty S. O.

Leo Fitz:
Well, imagine if you will a heavily secured compound. Manama, Bahrain. Multiple S. H. I. E. L. D. agents are taken hostage, tortured for information. May's mission: eliminate the threat.

Skye:
You mean kill people.

Jemma Simmons:
Not people: entire squads of mercenaries; almost 100.

Leo Fitz:
More than 100.

Jemma Simmons:
More than 100 men, heavily armed. Her vehicle got totaled, so she rode in.

Leo Fitz:
And, um, she had a M249 in each hand.

Jemma Simmons:
Right. In each hand. And she rode in on a horse.

Leo Fitz:
Hence the name [Whispers] the Cavalry.

Skye:
Is this real?

Jemma Simmons:
She eliminated the enemy threat single-handedly.

Leo Fitz:
She saw a lot of hurt that day.

Skye:
Is that why she's so...

Jemma Simmons:
Happy?

Phil Coulson:
[after May tranqs Hannah] So much for the welcome wagon.

Skye:
Sir, can it be me to talk to Hannah? Her life has been turned upside down, and we stuck her in a nightmare box. She thinks she's being punished. Can I please be the one to deliver the good news?

Grant Ward:
That a non-corporeal madman is hunting her?

Phil Coulson:
Ward, take a firearm. Escort Fitz-Simmons downstairs, assess the damage, get us up and running.

Jemma Simmons:
Wait. Guys, um where's Fitz?

Leo Fitz:
[Cut to Fitz, locked in a closet] Hello? Can anybody hear me? What the hell's happening? Did we crash? Who was screaming? This is not funny, Jemma, if this is a prank. This is a prank.

Hannah:
Do you believe in god?

Skye:
Honestly? Not really.

Hannah:
Well, I do. And I know that he's punishing me, and I deserve it.

Skye:
No. No, you don't. No one does. I had a few nuns around me growing up, and they would talk like that, scaring kids with stories of god's wrath. It made me not want to believe. The only words that stuck with me were something that sister McKenna said from the Bible, I think. She said, "god is love. " It's simple and it's a little sappy, but that's the version I like. God is love the thing that holds us together. And if that's true, I don't think he would punish you for making a mistake. I think he'd forgive a mistake.

Skye:
I should be with Hannah, anyway. No wonder she keeps screaming in there. You keep sending in the Cavalry, you're bound to get a reaction like that.

Phil Coulson:
Don't don't call her that.

Skye:
Why not? No normal person can shoot 100 Bahrain...

Phil Coulson:
That's not how it went down.

Skye:
Whatever, 20. I just I don't understand...

Phil Coulson:
She didn't have a gun. None of us did. [Skye perks up] And it wasn't a rescue or an assault, whatever they say at the academy these days. We were the welcome wagon. And it went South.

Skye:
How many...?

Phil Coulson:
Plenty. A civilian girl and a few of our guys were stuck inside a building, being held by the followers of this gifted individual or worshippers. We never found out.

Skye:
May did.

Phil Coulson:
She took it upon herself to get them out. Said she could fix the problem. So she went in, crossed off the enemy force. Didn't say how.

Skye:
Did she lose anyone in there?

Phil Coulson:
Herself.

Grant Ward:
We're here, sir. Where'd you go?

Phil Coulson:
We were attacked, locked in, then the guy disappeared.

Leo Fitz:
Hey, that's our story.

Jemma Simmons:
It makes no sense for a man to complain about safety issues whilst causing them. Another theory is...

Grant Ward:
Theories don't matter. Only facts, and the fact is, a bullet will take you out of whatever world you're in.

Lance Hunter:
Forget about the plane. Can you pull up the...

Leo Fitz:
Footage of Bobbi. From the base. Before she left. Good idea.

Lance Hunter:
You know I am capable of finishing my own...

Leo Fitz:
Sentences. Yes, you are. Sorry.

Leo Fitz:
[Showing Hunter footage of May and Bobbi] Okay, that's May.

Lance Hunter:
[Impatient] Yeah. And that's the woman that once set my 1967 convertible GTO on fire. The question on the table is not who, but where!

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
What'd you do with Skye?

Alisha:
Follow me and I'll show you. [She splits into 4 versions of herself and they move in different directions]

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[Under his breath] I can't wait to get off this boat.

Alisha:
[to Lincoln] I'm headed downstairs to secure the armory. I'm also upstairs in the conference room.

Skye:
[after seeing her mother kill SHIELD agents] She just killed them. All of them. Didn't even think about it.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Yeah, I thought *my* mom was bad when she started watching Fox News.

Phil Coulson:
So, May asked off some time for the first time in the history of ever. Does that have anything to do with you being around these last few days?

Dr. Andrew Garner:
Now, you know I can't discuss personal matters with patients.

Phil Coulson:
I'm your patient now? I wasn't your patient the other night when you and your ex-wife snuck into my office and drank up half my scotch.

Gordon:
I'm trapped in here! That's not possible! What did you do?

Leo Fitz:
Science, b*tch.

Leo Fitz:
[Excited] Sir! Good news. I modified my field generators to act in unison as a quantum field disruptor.

Phil Coulson:
Great. You're saying you found a way to shut down Gordon's teleportation ability?

Leo Fitz:
[Deflated] Well, now my news sounds less good.

Phil Coulson:
Oh. Sorry.

Skye:
We can stop this. Please. Just tell where she took the crystals.

Lincoln Campbell:
The fan room. Where the ship's air circula...

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
[Knocks Lincoln over the head with a huge saw] Found a saw.

Skye:
I was getting through to him!

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Right now, I'm in a crack heads first, ask questions later frame of mind.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
What the hell took you so long?

Phil Coulson:
It's a big boat. With poor signage.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
What are those things?

Leo Fitz:
[Racing around the room, placing metal gadgets on the walls in hope of trapping Gordon] Quantum field disruptors. Should contain him here if he comes back.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Of course. Why didn't I think of that?

Leo Fitz:
It's okay. You've been busy. And you're not a quantum physicist. Completely understandable.

Phil Coulson:
[Hefting a large wrench and wielding it like a bat] You know, I batted over .400 in little league.

Lance Hunter:
Taking a bullet for me was stupid.

Bobbi Morse:
Walking into a trap when you know it's a trap is stupid.

Dr. Andrew Garner:
You convinced Mack not to quit.

Phil Coulson:
Yeah, well, he kinda owed me after cutting my hand without asking.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Are you Gordon?

Gordon:
Who are you?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I'm the guy who kills Gordon.

Calvin Zabo:
You know? You're better than I imagined. I imagined you perfect. You're way more interesting than that.

Skye:
[laughs] I wonder where I get that from.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
It's Gordon. Right?

Gordon:
And you are?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
I'm the guy who kills Gordon.

Lance Hunter:
You're really going to let Captain Ahab just waltz in there and have a fireside chat with Skye's mom?

Phil Coulson:
I am, though that is a really strange way of putting it.

Phil Coulson:
If I don't put my faith in them, then S.H.I.E.L.D. will fall apart all over again.

Lance Hunter:
Hate to break it to you, but S.H.I.E.L.D. will also fall apart if a dozen angry enhanced blokes rain terror on us all.

Leo Fitz:
Yeah

Phil Coulson:
I think we've been spending too much time together.

Leo Fitz:
Is Science & Technology what you imagined, Agent Ward?

Grant Ward:
Yep - no uniforms, no rope course, no defined muscularity on anyone.

Leo Fitz:
No marching in place, no IQs in double digits.

Phil Coulson:
That's the thing about Skye. What I told her shattered her world. Her lifelong search led to stories of murder, and now it's too difficult to continue. Her search is over. Her story ends here. But you know what she said?

Melinda May:
Tell me.

Phil Coulson:
She said no-her story started here. Her whole life, she thought she wasn't wanted, that she didn't belong, that every family that took her in didn't want her to stay, didn't care. But all that time, it was S.H.I.E.L.D. protecting her, looking after her. That's what she took away from the story-not the family she'll never have, but the one she's always had. Here I am, telling her something that could destroy her faith in humanity, and somehow she manages to repair a little piece of mine. The world is full of evil and lies and pain and death, and you can't hide from it-you can only face it. The question is, when you do, how do you respond? Who do you become?

Grant Ward:
You and Skye get comfortable with the students see if you can get them gossiping. Skye looks young enough to blend in.

Skye:
[Slightly offended] You're not exactly 'Old Man River' and Fitz looks younger than us.

Leo Fitz:
Time will come when you won't make fun of me for that. You'll be jealous. You'll be jealous, wrinkly, old hags.

Phil Coulson:
Alright what's up?

Melinda May:
You tell me?

Phil Coulson:
You're talking, more than ever.

Melinda May:
'Cause you're not.

Grant Ward:
It's strategic.

Jemma Simmons:
It's adorable.

Skye:
The Tin Man has a heart after all.

Donnie Gill:
It's true what the other guys say - you are the smartest person to come through here.

Leo Fitz:
Is that what they say? Yeah? Well, Simmons is probably smarter, technically, but that - that's just because she likes homework more than life itself.

Agent Weaver:
Based on the level of intelligence it would take to put a device together like the one we found, we've narrowed it down to the top 10% of our Cadets. I'm worried there's a bad seed.

Grant Ward:
[to Skye] Ops and sciences have differences, but both have to be careful about what we call "bad seeds," people who want to use the tools we give them for-...

Skye:
[Interrupting] "Bad seed" isn't a SHIELD term, Ward, just a term.

Grant Ward:
And you can't think of any reason a top student would want to go after you?

Seth Dormer:
No. Um, the top students are my friends. It's competitive here, but we usually don't resort to knocking each other off. This isn't operations. No offense.

Grant Ward:
None taken.

Phil Coulson:
But I'm tired of secrets, so I'm glad we're here. We need to root out all the secrets.

Melinda May:
Agent Ward and I have been having sex.

Agent Lumley:
We were headed into the Hunan province of China.A senior agent had called in an 0-8-4. An object of unknown origin.

Phil Coulson:
We've dealt with those before.

Agent Lumley:
He said the entire village had died trying to protect this one. Avery and I were just fresh out of the Academy. And there was five of us just running the back end, until we lost communication with the first team. We went searching. We found the senior agent under a bridge. He he managed to escape with a gunshot wound to the neck, but he bled out. He was still holding on to the 0-8-4. [Breathes] Poor thing was covered in blood. We thought she was dead, too, but sh-she was just asleep in the dead agent's arms.

Phil Coulson:
[Stunned] The baby? The girl was the 0-8-4?

Phil Coulson:
Can you reach the North campus parking garage? We think Donnie Gill and his device may be trapped in the center of the storm.

Grant Ward:
That's not far from where I am. I can get there. [Opens the door to an insane storm and shuts it again] Yeah, I can't get there.

Phil Coulson:
[On the phone] Agent Phil Coulson with SHIELD. We've never actually met, but I'm familiar with your work - all of it.

Ian Quinn:
So, this is a "getting to know you" call?

Phil Coulson:
No, just a message that the first time your aircraft drifts over any country allied with SHIELD, we will shoot you out of the sky.

Ian Quinn:
So this is a courtesy call. Well, thank you, Agent Coulson.And I have a message for you. The Clairvoyant told me to say hello.

Dum Dum Dugan:
I'll give them an "A" for effort.

Jim Morita:
Guten tag, boys. All right, nice and calm. No sudden moves or we'll tie a blasting cap to your... Hey, Dugan, what's the German word for "nuts"?

Dum Dum Dugan:
I don't know, Jim. But tie a blasting cap to them, I bet we'll hear it.

Peggy Carter:
These assets are now under the protection of the Strategic Scientific Reserve. They'll be hidden out of sight, indefinitely... as will you.

Hydra Officer:
Cut off one head, two more shall grow in its place.

Peggy Carter:
Then I guess we'll keep cutting them off.

Phil Coulson:
[imitating Brigadier General Talbot] It's Private Tilden, isn't it?

Private Tilden:
Yes, sir.

Phil Coulson:
Well, I don't care I about this register or that. I want General Jones and his friends sent directly to the ordnance depot to meet me.

Billy Koenig:
Go bigger. Go bigger.

Phil Coulson:
...Or I'll have you so deep in horse manure, son, you'll need a damn snorkel.

Phil Coulson:
[imitating Brigadier General Talbot] Talbot out!

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
Operation didn't go well, I take it?

Antoine Triplett:
[with irony] What gave you that idea?

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
It's a shame, man. I was hoping that agent you were scoping out would have some tech we could use.

Antoine Triplett:
Sorry, Mack. No new toys.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
You get *any*thing?

Antoine Triplett:
A new enemy.

Skye:
[to Trip who is wearing a military uniform in disguise] General?

Antoine Triplett:
C'mon, girl. You know I look good.

Lance Hunter:
The mystery I'd like to solve is, why should we be paying you so much? This looks like a box. Sorry... a picture of a box... a picture of a box you don't have.

Roger Browning:
The government has it, along with thousands of other assets they've seized from S.H.I.E.L.D., and they don't know what to make of half of them. I worked in a S.H.I.E.L.D. containment facility that had hundreds of boxes that look just like this. But this is the only one that has a level 10 classified file dedicated to it.

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
You're selling us a needle in a haystack.

Roger Browning:
Finding the haystack is up to you. I know your reputation. I'm sure you'll be fine. What I don't appreciate is you changing the terms on me now.

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
We're asking for clarification, Browning. You're the one who changed the terms, bringing more than the two guards we agreed upon.

Roger Browning:
[Confused] I only brought two guards. [Creel comes up behind them and attacks]

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
Sir, Mark's down. Third party, possibly Hydra, and we're out in the open. What are our orders?

Phil Coulson:
Go dark.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
We witnessed the single greatest intelligence collapse in recorded history, George. We have a duty to the American people to hunt down those responsible. So, no, I don't sleep most nights.

George Stephanopoulos:
General Talbot, you said you have S.H.I.E.L.D. personnel and weaponry locked in a secure facility, so is it fair to say that S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Hydra terrorists who poisoned its ranks have been defeated?

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
The corrupt institution has been dismantled, yes. We cut down the tree, we pulled up the roots, but let's just say I'll rest easier when we throw it all on the bonfire.

Billy Koenig:
So, the guy was bulletproof, huh? That's sweet.

Melinda May:
You're the man in charge, but I'm in charge of you, remember? I had two rules.

Phil Coulson:
Avoid field operations...

Melinda May:
...And check in with me every few days. It's been two weeks.

Phil Coulson:
And I'm flying back out tonight. I have to focus on recruitment. It's starting to wear me down.

Melinda May:
The hours?

Phil Coulson:
The numbers. Between the traitors, military detainees, and the sell-outs in the private sector, the people who could possibly be considered loyal to S.H.I.E.L.D. is not impressive. And they're scattered all over the damn globe.

Melinda May:
Well, you have no choice but to meet them face-to-face, get a read on them.

Phil Coulson:
I know, and I prefer it. But flying economy blows.

Melinda May:
Hartley, Hunter, Idaho.

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
What's the word?

Melinda May:
In his office.

Idaho:
The director requests an audience?

Lance Hunter:
Oh, the man doesn't do requests. And, listen, when we get in there, no matter what you do, don't look him in the eye.

Idaho:
[Concerned] Really?

Lance Hunter:
Nah, he's all right.

Isabelle 'Izzy' Hartley:
But you should both focus on not saying anything overly stupid.

Idaho:
Yes, ma'am.

Lance Hunter:
I'm not making any promises.

Phil Coulson:
What's your assessment of Hartley's people?

Melinda May:
You know what I think. They're mercenaries, here for the money.

Phil Coulson:
But what's your assessment?

Melinda May:
They're *good* mercenaries.

Antoine Triplett:
It's a little bit strange. I mean, they're exactly the same. You really think they were just twins? Come on.

Skye:
I have heard all your theories, Trip.

Antoine Triplett:
And Koenig's always mentioning other brothers. Every day, another brother. If he brings up one more brother, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Billy Koenig:
There's an inertial confinement laser barrier down there, Which is cool. Now this button turns it soundproof. This button makes it opaque.

Skye:
Just tell me there isn't an "off" button I can accidentally hit.

Billy Koenig:
You'll be safe. I promise.

Phil Coulson:
I want to make your job easier. Chasing us is a waste of resources, general. We're the good guys, and we can help you catch the bad guys.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
Kidnapping me and tying me up in your honeycomb kill room is not helping your case. Do you think I'm an idiot?

Phil Coulson:
Oh, no. You're the real deal. But you're surrounded by people who constantly underestimate the threat they're up against. Me and my people swore an oath we don't intend to break: to protect the innocent, to watch out for people... people like your son.

Brigadier General Glenn Talbot:
How dare you bring my family into this.

Phil Coulson:
We save lives, including yours, whether you like it or not.

Phil Coulson:
I know it was a risk. If we went down today, we'd probably be down for good. But now we have a chance to survive. We have soldiers willing to sacrifice, but they need weapons. The enemy has the advantage. We need one of our own.

Alphonso 'Mack' Mackenzie:
You risked that for a quinjet?

Phil Coulson:
No. For what we can do with one. Disappear. Become ghosts. That's how we have to live now... in the shadows, to save people, even when they don't know it, don't want it.

Leo Fitz:
Look at Koenig, running analysis. Well, it looks like we've got our new golden boy.

Jemma Simmons:
"New"? As opposed to the original?

Leo Fitz:
Yes! Me. And I've been sidelined.

Jemma Simmons:
No. Well, I mean, maybe, but in the way that a player is sidelined due to injury in a football match.

Leo Fitz:
Football or American football?

Grant Ward:
I went through a... rough stretch. First pair of pants they gave me had a... a button on the back. They took that away. But you fold a piece of paper just right, it gets sharp. When they took that away, I started running at the walls.

Skye:
You should have run faster.

Phil Coulson:
Really? All the war and chaos in the world, and S.H.I.E.L.D. sends a plane after us.

Grant Ward:
Three planes - small transport to dock and a pair of F-35s to make sure we hand over Quinn.

Phil Coulson:
If they scratch my paint, I'm gonna be pissed.

Antoine Triplett:
Come on, man. Garrett was your S.O., too, so you know how this works.

Grant Ward:
Why don't you remind me.

Antoine Triplett:
Garrett wants Quinn. It's my job to make sure Garrett gets what he wants. Now where is he?

Grant Ward:
Can't help you there.

Antoine Triplett:
No worries. I'll find him myself. I'm sure he's tucked between the jacuzzi and the squash court.

John Garrett:
[to Ian Quinn] Tell us about Cybertek and the Deathlok program?

Phil Coulson:
Deathlok?

John Garrett:
Catchy right? Sounds like some wrestler from the 80's. What is it really?

Ian Quinn:
Those are dangerous waters, and the last agent that waded into them wound up with two in the stomach.

[Garrett smacks him]

Ian Quinn:
So... She's still alive?

John Garrett:
Yeah. And you better hope she stays that way.

Phil Coulson:
Is that why you shot Skye? Because she saw what Cybertek delivered?

Ian Quinn:
No. I shot Skye because that's what the Clairvoyant told me to do.

Leo Fitz:
Comms are down. There's too much mountain on top of us.

John Garrett:
Trust me - it's better. You don't want them hearing the horrible death we're walking into.

[Fitz gives a worried stare]

John Garrett:
Humor, son. You Brits are too serious. Besides, if the job was easy...

Grant Ward:
It wouldn't be fun.

Leo Fitz:
I'm not afraid - not yet.

Ian Quinn:
You said there was good news.

John Garrett:
I did? Oh, yeah. You still have your tongue.

Leo Fitz:
So what about Tahiti?

Phil Coulson:
Turns out, not so magical.

John Garrett:
[to Ian Quinn] Let me be clear. You have no rights, no lawyer, the only thing keeping Agent Coulson here from throwing you out of this plane is the very weak heartbeat of the agent downstairs. And the only incentive I have for not tearing your tongue out is that you'll use it to answer my questions.

Melinda May:
If Coulson thinks there's a chance in a million to save Skye, to save any of us, he'd take it. People like us, we need people like him.

Phil Coulson:
Garrett? What the hell are you doing here?

John Garrett:
Well, as opposed to the Leven 8 jackass I'm staring at, I still follow orders.

Phil Coulson:
You're the worst at following orders.

Dr. Jazuat:
[Regarding Skye] The shots perforated her stomach and penetrated the large and small intestines. We resected what we could, but - there's been too much damage.

Phil Coulson:
So what's next?

Dr. Jazuat:
We can keep her comfortable, but you'll need to make a decision on whether or not you want to keep her on life support.

Phil Coulson:
You're saying there's nothing to be done?

Dr. Jazuat:
I'm saying you need to call her family. Get them here as soon as possible.

Phil Coulson:
*We're* her family.

Dr. Jazuat:
In that case, I'm very sorry.

John Garrett:
We do our jobs right, this will all go peacefully.

Grant Ward:
What if they don't want to help us?

John Garrett:
[Takes out a gun] I'll say "pretty please".

Leo Fitz:
Just allow me these rare moments of self-pity, okay? You're the least supportive pretend girlfriend I've ever had.

Grant Ward:
We both know personal urges can adversely affect tactical decisions.

Melinda May:
That's why I don't have any. You should do the same.

Grant Ward:
Really? You think Coulson will take that excuse if he finds out about us?

Melinda May:
Took it okay when I told him.

Grant Ward:
Wait. You told him?

Melinda May:
[Nonchalant] Yep.

Phil Coulson:
What are you doing?

Jemma Simmons:
I'm getting into character. My undercover persona harbors some residual resentment to her absent American father. Blames him for not being there when her mom died. So I apologize in advance if I come off a little cold.

Phil Coulson:
You think all that back story's necessary?

Jemma Simmons:
Past events, like that unfortunate incident at the Hub, have shown me that I'm *not* good at improvisation.

Skye:
Fitz, have you ever heard of an 0-8-4 being a person?

Leo Fitz:
No, but I suppose it's possible. I'd hate to meet the guy.

Skye:
You, uh, got a little flustered back there.

Leo Fitz:
What? When you kissed me on the cheek like my grandmother? Good going. Really selling our relationship there.

Debonair Gentleman:
[to Jemma] I'm terribly sorry about your loss, dear.

[to Coulson]

Debonair Gentleman:
As for you, now is your chance to do better. Why don't you see that you take it?

Grant Ward:
Holotable... on. Holotable... activate.

Phil Coulson:
It's pretty tricky, right? I couldn't even find the on button.

Jemma Simmons:
All mom ever wanted was your love. To be with you! In our two-story Victorian home in the Cotswolds! But could you even give her a moment, what with your banking job requiring you to travel to the States from Tuesday to Saturday every other week? No! You may not have had any time for her, but you had time for your work... and your prostitutes!

Phil Coulson:
Prostitutes, plural?

Grant Ward:
The train it just...

Phil Coulson:
Yep. Vanished. Which I might add, is not easy.

Phil Coulson:
Not a grenade exactly. It might be some type of cloaking mechanism.

Grant Ward:
Maybe it created some kind of portal. Jumped the train there.

Phil Coulson:
Let's hope not. I can't deal with Asgard today.

Phil Coulson:
[Coulsen and Ward see a truck] Keys might be in it.

Phil Coulson:
[Ward shakes his head] It's the country. People are very trusting in the country.

Grant Ward:
[Walks up to the truck] It's running. [Looks closer] It's been hot-wired.

Phil Coulson:
This is...

Grant Ward:
Suspicious?

Phil Coulson:
I was gonna say "fortuitous".

Leo Fitz:
So are we British or American? When we're traveling together we should at least be from the same country. How's your Scottish accent?

Skye:
[In a very bad Scottish accent] I don't know. You tell me how great it is, laddie.

Leo Fitz:
[in a flawless American accent] American then. That's a better idea.

Skye:
Oh. That was really good.

Leo Fitz:
I used to watch a lot of American TV growing up. Some of it's quite good. Lots of nice teeth.

Phil Coulson:
We got this information from the Italian authorities monitoring the situation.

Melinda May:
And they don't mind us taking over this op?

Phil Coulson:
I asked very nicely.

Leo Fitz:
I'm always the gadget guy. Maybe sometimes I want to do things with my bare hands.

Skye:
You make the gadgets with your bare hands.

Train Conductor:
As we round the bend, the passengers on the North side of the train can take in the views of the famous Tre cime di Lavaredo. Isn't it a wonder?

Jemma Simmons:
Look at that. I haven't seen anything so beautiful since our family's scuba-diving trip to the island of Koh Tao in Southeastern Thailand.

Phil Coulson:
Okay, Simmons, I appreciate all your preparation, but-...

Jemma Simmons:
[Persistent] Don't you want to know which marine life we encountered?

Grant Ward:
Uh, sir? This probably isn't the best time, but what May told you I would have preferred it to stay between me and her.

Phil Coulson:
Well, "it" is happening on my bus, amongst members of my team.

Grant Ward:
[Flustered] No, we've never... done - It's never happened on the bus, sir.

Phil Coulson:
You want to do this now? Okay. What you're doing is against protocol, so if you endanger an operation or if anyone gets hurt, I'll reassign you to Barrow, Alaska, and you'll spend the rest of your years pulling the night shift guarding Blonsky's cryo-cell. Am I clear? [Looks at Ward's face] I'll take that as a yes. And if it's really just sex, Ward you should get more comfortable using the word.

Phil Coulson:
You forget, I saw plenty of action with the Avengers.

Melinda May:
[Coulson walks away. Quietly to herself] And you died.

Quinn's Main Guard:
[after Skye takes Quinn's gun] Kid's got balls.

Skye:
Thanks, but yuck.

Ian Quinn:
But do you have what it takes to pull the trigger?

Skye:
...Nope. [Skye turns around, jumps off the balcony and into the pool]

Dr. Franklin Hall:
[about Quinn] He's addicted to exploiting opportunities. He never gives a thought to the friends, ecosystems, future generations left ruined in his wake.

Phil Coulson:
Like Agents Fitz and Simmons, your former students? I've got them in my ear right now, telling me you're not a bad guy. We could've worked with you on this.

Dr. Franklin Hall:
SHIELD? SHIELD is just as guilty of the same thing! Experimentation without thought of consequence! Your search for an unlimited power source brought an alien invasion.

Phil Coulson:
Fair point.

Phil Coulson:
Dr. Hall, Agent Coulson, we have an exit strategy.

Dr. Franklin Hall:
SHIELD?

Phil Coulson:
Yes sir. We let's get you out of here.

Dr. Franklin Hall:
Well, I'm sorry Mr. Coulson; I'm right where I'm supposed to be.

Phil Coulson:
[pauses for a moment, stunned] I'll be honest. Our strategy did not take into consideration you saying that.

Grant Ward:
I know Director Fury felt he owes you after you scarified yourself.

Phil Coulson:
And my card collection.

Phil Coulson:
We need a reset here Fitz. Fitz?

Jemma Simmons:
Saying his name repeatedly, does not increase productivity!

Leo Fitz:
Okay, done!

Jemma Simmons:
...Or maybe it does.

Grant Ward:
And the attackers?

Phil Coulson:
Invisible.

Skye:
Wait, invisible? Cool. [Grant glares] But terrible.

Phil Coulson:
[Interrupting Chesterfield's horse-back riding] Excuse me.

Todd Chesterfield:
Who the hell are you?

Phil Coulson:
A concerned citizen who happens to be a member of a gigantic bureaucratic organization that is tracking your every move.

Ian Quinn:
I'm now a naturalized citizen of this fair country. Stunning beaches, beautiful tax laws, and a deep-seated hatred of outside forces telling them what to do.

Dr. Franklin Hall:
Sounds like your dating profile.

Grant Ward:
I need a new strategy.

Phil Coulson:
Try no strategy. Stop thinking like an operative, start thinking like a person. Maybe Skye will let that person help her.

Grant Ward:
Help her what?

Phil Coulson:
Think like an operative.

Grant Ward:
Do you know the hardest thing about boxing?

Skye:
Getting punched in the face?

Melinda May:
[Regarding how to get in Quinn's compound] Without a man inside, it's impossible, unless you're immune to pulse laser emissions.

Leo Fitz:
If we had a monkey, we could get in. If we had a small monkey, he could slip through the sensors and disable the fence's power source with his adorable little hands.

Ian Quinn:
S.H.I.E.L.D.'s against everything you stand for. They're big brother.

Skye:
Maybe, but they're the nice big brother who stands up for his helpless little brother when he's getting beat up because he ate a piece of cake that he wasn't... you know, you kidnapped a person!

Phil Coulson:
[after Dr. Hall hits a switch on the gravity-altering device and Coulson flies across the room] Something tells me that *wasn't* the "off" button.

Skye:
[Doing a fitness workout] Why do I even have to do this? I'm sure Fitz-Simmons' supervising officer didn't make them do this muscle stuff.

Grant Ward:
You said you wanted to be a field Agent, like Coulson. Well, if you'd like to switch disciplines...

[shouts to Jemma]

Grant Ward:
Hey, Simmons. What did your S.O. give you guys for morning drills?

Jemma Simmons:
[excited] Oh, atomistic attribute drills. Yeah, we'd name the mechanical, chemical, thermal...

Leo Fitz:
...Electrical properties of materials.

Skye:
[to Ward] Okay, okay. They made your point.

Leo Fitz:
Gravitonium. It's an extremely rare high-atomic numbered element.

Jemma Simmons:
That powers the device. It's so extremely rare that most people didn't believe it existed, much less the theory that an isolated positive charge...

Leo Fitz:
...Would turn the flow from isotropic...

Skye:
[Interrupts] Guys, high-school dropout here. How does the device work again?

Jemma Simmons:
Well, Gravitonium distorts gravity fields within itself, causing an undulating, amorphous shape.