Superbad2007

Officer Michaels:
You know, this job though isn't how shows like CSI make it out to be. When I first joined the force, I was under the impression that everything was covered in a fine layer of semen. And that the police had at their disposal a semen database with every bad guy's semen on it. Not true!

Officer Slater:
Yup.

Officer Michaels:
If only there was semen on everything, it would make our jobs easier.

Officer Slater:
Hell yeah!

Officer Michaels:
I often go to sleep and dream of waking up in a world where everything is covered in semen.

Officer Slater:
I mean, who doesn't? It's like your wish that you could walk out of a room and just know where the semen was. You just know like Sherlock Holmes, if he was in his day, Sherlock Holomes, in his day... And this is a proven historical fact. Sherlock Holmes, when he was alive, knew where semen was.

Officer Michaels:
Could smell it out like a rat.

Officer Slater:
Smell it out. Anything.

Officer Michaels:
Like the crime scene today, if the man had ejaculated and then punched you in the face, we'd have a real good shot at catching him.

Officer Slater:
No way.

Officer Michaels:
Just punched you in the face. No semen.

Officer Slater:
Yeah, no semen. And that's the only way you can find DNA by the way, if it's in the jizz.

Officer Michaels:
Semen. It's the best DNA, is in the jizz.

Officer Slater:
I'm telling you right now, sometimes I just want to make, you know, live in a world of semen.