Duckman, Season 1

Duckman:
The reason people come to the Duckman Detective Agency is Duckman, not Cornfed!

Uranus:
[over intercom] Phonecall for Mr. Cornfed.

Fluffy:
Fax for Mr. Cornfed.

Uranus:
Carrier pigeon for Mr. Cornfed.

Fluffy:
Semaphore for Mr. Cornfed.

Uranus:
Smoke signals for Mr. Cornfed.

Duckman:
[shouts out the window] CORNFED DOESN'T WORK HERE ANYMORE!!!

Indian Chief:
Hmm, let's try him at home. [picks up a phone and dials Cornfed's number]

Duckman:
What are you bothering me with that stuff for?! I told ya - he's gone! Fired! He was nothing but a big pink weight on my shoulders, and we're better off without him!

Fluffy:
If you say so...

Uranus:
How's the case going without him?

Duckman:
Case? What case? Oh right, the case! I was just about to put it to bed. [chuckles] Along with the client.

Fluffy:
Hmm. The kind of joke he'd probably enjoy telling when Cornfed was around.

Duckman:
Hey, maybe it's time for you two hairballs to do something around here besides irritating the hell outta me!

Fluffy:
You want our help?!

Uranus:
On a case?!

Duckman:
I'll start with a couple questions, not that I don't already know the answers. I do. I just wanna, you know, see how you're thinking. Suppose you're the chairman of a large--

Uranus:
Uh-uh-uh-uh. Chair person.

Duckman:
Suppose you're the chair person of a large corporation that makes meat on a stick.

Fluffy:
Oh, Mr. Duckman! We couldn't support the killing of animals for food!

Uranus:
Nor the senseless slaughter of trees for sticks!

Duckman:
Okay... You're the chair people of a large, environmentally friendly corporation that produces wholesome apples. Now! You're supposed to prove that someone died of natural causes. What would you do?

Fluffy:
Are the apple free-range, or are they grown in captivity?

[Duckman throws Fluffy and Uranus out the window, who then land on the street and get run over by a streetsweeper]