In Treatment, Season 1

Paul:
What happened last night?

Laura:
Well, what didn't happen? The long version or the bottom line? Because the bottom line is very simple. My life is over.

Paul:
Then, you'd better tell me the long version.

Laura:
Suddenly I felt like doing it. I never had sex in a bathroom before. I mean what, I should go and marry Andrew without ever knowing what a good bathroom f***'s all about. It's part of a young lady's education, isn't it?

Laura:
You look so sad. It looks good on you.

Alex:
So, are there any rules?

Paul:
Rules?

Alex:
Ground rules. Anything I should know before we start?

Paul:
Oh... Not really. It's more or less... It's more or less up to you.

Alex:
Oh, right, right. I'm a customer.

Paul:
Yeah. Though in my profession we say that the customer is always wrong.

[Alex looks surprised at Paul]

Paul:
That's a... It's a therapists' joke.

Paul:
[to Alex] Remember you said that life chose you to be a member of an elite? That it wasn't your decision? Maybe that's an attitude you're comfortable with. You're comfortable with it because you don't have to make any decisions. It relieves you of responsibility. Your commanding officer, he makes the decisions, conveys them to you, and you execute them.

Paul:
[reading a report Sophie made him read] According to what it says here... it looks like you could have died too.

Sophie:
Yeah, that would have solved a lot of problems.

Paul:
What would it solve?

Sophie:
Nothing. I didn't mean anything by it.

Paul:
Is that why you came here today, Sophie? For me to tell you that you're all right? That you're not crazy? Is that the test you're afraid of failing?

Amy:
I feel happier and I've lost the weight. And for the first time I can actually see myself as someone who... Someone who...

Jake:
Someone who'd never have a baby with a shithead.

Amy:
You are so primitive.

Jake:
Primitive? Back when she was cheating with me on her first husband, Paul, I was sexy. But now I'm primitive.

Amy:
It's my pregnancy.

Jake:
Our pregnancy. It's ours.

Amy:
Oh really?

Jake:
Yeah, that's right!

Amy:
And the hemorrhoids, are those yours too? And the nine months of morning sickness, whose are those? And the extra fifty pounds, are those yours too?

Paul:
If patients could see what I think about them. If they could really see inside my head, they'd head for the hills, believe me. They'd run for cover.

Gina:
I always ask myself, 'If they were to diagnose therapists whose marriages fell apart, how many cases of erotic transference would they find?'

Paul:
What does that mean?

Gina:
That sometimes erotic transference in therapy is a test of your married life. If a therapist can't handle a situation where his patient falls in love with him, it may indicate some breakdown in his private life.

Laura:
You know, Paul, I'm, I'm generally open to your interpretations, but right now it just seems like you're trying to be a bit of a...

Paul:
Killjoy?

Laura:
Killjoy, yes, something like that. So don't. Especially since joy is a very rare thing when it comes to me.

Paul:
Perhaps I'm an alternative to everything that Andrew represents... Dependency, anxiety. But I am not a realistic option for you. This is a safe place where you can come, like David at the beach.

Laura:
Yes, but with one big difference.

Paul:
What's that?

Laura:
I don't want you to adopt me, I want you to f*** me.

Alex:
Feelings are not a philosophy. You either feel or you don't. You can't bullshit about it.

Alex:
If you hold on to this organ... called guilt feelings... And I believe that's what it is. It's an organ. Like the spleen or liver. The system will cut it out of you completely. Understand? I have no way of feeling guilt anymore. I don't have the organ.

Paul:
[to Sophie] You know, when you walked in here I thought to myself, somebody in your life has broken the rules. And I felt that, that if I had helped you change your clothes, that I would have been doing the same thing. I felt like you were testing me. I felt like you wanted to make sure that this was a safe place. That the same things that happen out there don't happen in here.

Sophie:
Did you know, like, every girl there is a Mia or an Anna except me? They know it. They just don't do anything about it. They encourage it.

Paul:
These girls, Anna and Mia, are they friends of yours?

Sophie:
You don't know these girls? They're fun girls, especially Anna. Rexic...?

[pause]

Paul:
Anorexic. Okay. And Mia, bulimia?

Sophie:
You're sharp as a tack.

Paul:
Thank you.

Paul:
[after admitting to talking to Gina] Well, I had to talk to somebody. I can't talk to you about...

Kate:
No, of course you can't talk to me.

Paul:
You know what I mean, Kate. It's easier for me to talk to Gina than to somebody who... who doesn't know me.

Paul:
You know what amazes me? What really gets me is that you can go to this guy's place. And then you can come home here all wet and flushed and excited and horny. And you can sit down with our son and do his homework. How does that make you feel? I just want to know how does that make you feel?!

Kate:
It makes me feel like shit. And a week later I go back and I do it all over again.

Paul:
[to Gina] If I transferred every patient I was attracted to at some point, I wouldn't have any patients left. And it's not your place to say I should transfer a patient. It's like me telling that couple they should have an abortion. It's not what therapists do. We don't tell people how to run their lives.

Paul:
There was a time when I used to talk about my patients, when Ian was a kid. I would share... share details.

Gina:
Kate. You don't mean Ian.

Paul:
Both of them at the dinner table. I see that look of horror on your face. No, I was pretty discreet actually. I never mentioned any names. If someone mentioned rats, I'd say, 'I had a patient with a fear of rats', 'dreamed about rats every night.' You know, stuff like that.

Gina:
You don't do that now?

Paul:
No. But I remember when Ian was about 10, he asked me, 'Dad, what's an alcoholic?' And I told him about this patient of mine who needed a drink actually to get out of bed in the morning. [pause] One day this man came up to the office and he was... kind of staggering and Ian said, 'Dad, is that the alcoholic?'

Laura:
I'm getting married in a few months. I need to, uh, conserve every last drop of energy for my wedding.

Paul:
You're finding it requires energy that you don't have? I thought brides were supposed to be whirling dervish of activity.

Laura:
[smiles] Oh my God. The word 'bride' creeps me out.

Laura:
No matter how hard you try to be different, you end up looking like everybody else, even worse. [pause] God, I wish I could just get married in Vegas. No caterers, no guests, just an alcoholic justice of the peace and a transvestite organ player.

Paul:
[to Alex] You brought me a coffee machine because you intend to come here more often and you want to feel at home. Through Laura, you're trying to relate that message to me. 'She's your patient and I am too.' So we are... officially in therapy.

Paul:
You can't see any way in which you and your father may have married the same kind of woman? It seems to me that you both married women whom you admire, but... But you don't necessarily love.

Alex:
That's some bullshit. You actually buy this shit? That I'm repeating my father's mistakes? Let me tell you something: what's going on in my marriage has got nothing to do with my father, so stop comparing us.

Paul:
Grownups can forget. Children can't.

Paul:
I'm not a magician. I don't know anything more than what you've told me.

Sophie:
I f***ing hate you! You never say what you really mean. You know, you're just like all the rest of them. Why can't anyone ever tell anyone else the truth? I can't listen to any more of your stupid bullshit words.

Jake:
You're hitting on our therapist too? You are f***ing unbelievable. Why? Because he's a doctor? He could be your father.

Amy:
Sorry, Paul.

Jake:
Don't apologize for me, all right?

Paul:
What about your kids?

Kate:
I don't know. Maybe they'll suddenly discover they have a father.

Paul:
You're doing this for them? You're having an affair so that they can rediscover their father.

Kate:
No, I'm doing it for me.

Gina:
You're using me as your accomplice. Not in a practical way. But emotionally, to help you move on from them [your patients]. That way you're free to be with Laura.

Paul:
You know, I don't even want to say to that. I mean, what... are you doing? Is this what you call help? 'cause that's why I came here. I came here for you to help me. I keep saying this. But through some misguided line of reasoning, through some narcissistic... need of yours to save the day, to put yourself at the front and the center, we've ended up here. In this same place... just to confirm that you, Gina, are right. As always.

Paul:
I fantasize about Laura. Look, it's like a gynecologist. It's easier for women to believe that their male gynecologist doesn't have any sexual desire for them. Of course, they want him to find their bodies attractive as well.

Gina:
Paul.

Paul:
Don't they?

Gina:
Don't break down the relationship between a woman and her gynecologist. That's the deep end.

Laura:
[talking to Paul about breaking up with Andrew] He'll make a nice husband for someone who deserves him.

Paul:
But obviously not for you?

Laura:
I nearly f*** guys in bathroom stalls, as you very kindly reminded me. I just couldn't stand up there in front of everyone, promise to... Well, I just shouldn't ever make promises. I promise not to make any more promises. How's that?

Laura:
[to Paul] Something in you is restless, damaged. There's a yearning there, and I know it when I see it. And I want you just the way you are... Damaged and restless, yearning... Warts and all.

Alex:
I want you to tell me something. Honestly. Do you really think you can help me? If we sit here, we talk about f***ing a few times, you'll be able to solve all my problems?

Paul:
I don't have the answer to that question.

Alex:
Yeah, I knew you'd say that. You know, that's what kills me about you people. 'Cause any other professional... I go to a doctor, he takes a look and he says, 'This what you got. This is how long you have to live.' If I went to a mechanic, he'd say, '$2,000, it'll be good as new.' But you people, you don't guarantee shit.

Alex:
OK. I'll tell you what happened. Otherwise, you won't feel like you're doing your job, right? But before I start, something I've gotta know. Did you ever jerk off to anything a patient told you?

Paul:
What?

Alex:
Come on. Come on. I mean, you must hear some crazy stories from women. Explicit shit. Fantasies. Did you ever jerk off afterwards?

Paul:
Are you concerned that I'll masturbate to something that you tell me, Alex?

Alex:
Me? No. I'm talking about you've got women, they sit here on your couch. They tell you all about f***ing. It must get to you sometimes. I know it would get to me.

Paul:
Do you masturbate?

Alex:
There you go again, you're answering a question with a question.

Paul:
All right. I'll answer with an answer. I'm a human being. I masturbate sometimes. My fantasies are about many, many things. All sorts of women. Is that what you wanted to hear? That in that regard I'm not that substantially different from you?

Alex:
That's the first time you've ever answered one of my questions. In any case, you won't masturbate to me and Laura's story, I guarantee you that. You may think of it the next time you're having sex with your wife and you're trying not to come.

Sophie:
[recounting a perfect routine she did in the gym] I could feel everybody's eyes on my back. I wanted to turn around and just...

Paul:
And what?

Sophie:
Nothing.

Paul:
No, come on, tell me.

Sophie:
I wanted to flip them the bird with both hands like 'F*** all of you and the fish you swam in on.'

Paul:
A few minutes ago you said you had to run off to the gym in order to be with her [mother].

Sophie:
How extraordinary, Dr. Freud. Whatever do you think I meant? Maybe it means that... No matter what I do, I can't get rid of her.

Paul:
Maybe it means that, in order to keep her interested in you, you feel you have to run away.

Sophie:
That doesn't even make sense. You sound like a fortune cookie.

Paul:
It's interesting to me that the things that... That drew you together in the first place are the things that seem to annoy you about each other. It's very interesting...

Jake:
One more 'it's interesting', And I swear to God I'm gonna f***ing deck you, OK?

Paul:
Ending a conflict isn't the best thing for the relationship, because you get so used to fighting each other that you might lose interest if the conflict ends.

Gina:
Easier to see patterns when they're not ours.

Paul:
Or we see them but we can't avoid them. That's worse.

Gina:
The way you took critique, it made you furious. You know, it was one professional assessment. And you took it personally. So personally, I had to wonder if it wasn't an echo of an earlier rejection.

Paul:
Please, Gina. Not this again. I know exactly where you're going with this.

Gina:
A son who feels he's disappointed his father. A son who feels he hasn't lived up to his father's expectations. It's something you would want to address.

Paul:
Please don't minimize what you said to me. I wasn't reacting to something in my past in relation to my father.

Gina:
One review drove you out of the institute.

Paul:
That letter pissed on eight years of my work. Despite it, though, I did become an excellent therapist. Some people might say that... I became a better therapist than you.