Sheep in the Big City

Ben Plotz:
The farm! The Idyllic home of Farmer John - a man who loves farming so much his first name is "Farmer".

Farmer John:
Hands off my Sheepie!

General Specific:
Dagnabbit, man! This is a matter of national security! I must have that sheep! I'm in charge of a top secret agency, you know.

Farmer John:
Really? Which one?

General Specific:
I can't tell you. It's a secret.

Farmer John:
I won't tell.

General Specific:
But if I told you, it wouldn't be a secret!

Farmer John:
Well, if you won't tell, then I'll take my sheep and go home.

General Specific:
Ooh! I wouldn't do that if I were you! If you don't give me that sheep, my soldiers will return and destroy your farm! Destroy it!

[laughs evilly]

Ranting Swede:
It-a makes me so mad! [takes out a meatball] Why do people call these meatballs? [throws the meatball off-screen] They're not balls! [starts bouncing a basketball] A ball, you can play with! A ball is fun, and bouncy, bouncy, bouncy! [takes out the meatball again] This, it just goes to pieces if you try to hit it with a tennis racket! It doesn't even hurt if you kick it! [the meatball splatters on the floor, and he kicks it] These are meat-LUMPS! These are lumps, not balls [a beach ball appears, and he throws them off-screen] I can't understand it! [saddening up] And it's my own people doing this. I hang my head in shame.

General Specific:
[over the phone]: We'll be right over!

'[doorbell rings and Lady Richington answers it]'

Lady Richington:
How did you get here so fast?

General Specific:
We used the plot device!

Plot Device:
Hello!

Ben Plotz:
Suddenly, Sheep hears a voice, a voice that will change his live forever!

Random Guy:
Peanuts, get your peanuts here.

Ben Plotz:
Sorry, not that one, the next one, coming up.

Lady Richington:
Come along, Swanky.

General Specific:
Private Public, try to find me something for these inexplicable memory lapses I've been having.

Private Public:
I'll get on it, sir.

General Specific:
Thank you. Oh yes, and try to find me something for these inexplicable memory lapses I've been having.

Private Public:
Right away, sir.

General Specific:
Private Public, I have this nefarious desire to capture that sheep, but I can't remember why.

Private Public:
Maybe you should check the pilot script, sir.

Angry Scientist:
What is it with you? Are you in the getting of the craziness thing?

General Specific:
Now is not the time to discuss this, Mad Scientist.

Angry Scientist:
First of all, I am not mad! I am angry! I am an angry scientist! That is what it is saying on my card of businesses!

Private Public:
The men are very excited about taking a day off from sheep-capturing to play this softball game, sir.

General Specific:
I'm happy to allow it, Private Public. Of course, seeing how we're members of a secret military organization, security was a priority. But I ensured that no one would know about today's game.

Private Public:
Except the opposing team.

General Specific:
Uh... There might be a slight change of plans, Private Public.

[the Sultan's guards reach for the diamond to play catch]

Sultan:
Wait a second! Look, I like a good game of catch as much as the next sultan, but can't you use a softball, instead of my super valuable diamond?

Tall Guard:
But the diamond is so pretty.

Sultan:
That's why I'd hate for something to happen to it. Come on, use a softball.

[pulls out a softball]

Short Guard:
But we really, really want to use the diamond! We'll be so careful. Please?

Tall Guard:
I'll be your best friend.

Sultan:
Okay, but no more than five minutes. I'm timing.

The Narrator:
[ending the episode] Sheep is a total failure.

General Specific:
[being led away by Farmer John] But I'm not a sheep! I'm just a guy in a costume!

Farmer John:
A lot of sheep feel that way.

Citizens of The Big City:
[singing] Clearance Day, Clearance Day! Twice the gifts for half the pay!

General Specific:
[utterly shocked at catching Sheep] I... caught... him...

Angry Scientist:
So, I have invented something that will guarantee be catching that sheep - a time machine.

General Specific:
I already have one. See? [shows his watch] The big hand's on the 6, and the little hand's on the 2.

Angry Scientist:
Not a watch, you imbeciliated general person! I am talking about a time traveling machine that is abling us to travels anywhere in time.

Private Public:
If you can invent a time machine, why can't you invent a ray gun that works without a sheep?

Angry Scientist:
I am an artist, okay? Did anyone be telling Picasso how to be dancing? [General Specific and Private Public look confused] Okay, painting, whatever, you are getting my pointedness.

General Specific:
I don't want an ex-agent,I want a current agent!

Private Public:
The X is put in to indicate mysteriousness.

Ranting Swede:
You know what really makes me mad? EVERYTHING!