Kung Fu Panda

Po:
Oh! Master Tigress! Sorry! I didn't mean to disturb you!

Po:
There is no charge for awesomeness... or attractiveness.

Po:
I figured it out.

Po:
Don't tempt me.

Po:
OH NO!!

Po:
It's okay. I didn't get it the first time either.

Po:
[Weakly] Big fan!

Po:
That's what I thought.

Po:
You pickin' on my friends? Get ready to feel the thunder.

Po:
Who?

Po:
[After his conversation with Master Crane] That seemed a bit awkward.

Po:
Skadoosh!

Po:
What are you pointing at?

Po:
I know. Is here.

Po:
I LOVE KUNG FUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!

Po:
I'm not a big, fat panda. I'm the big, fat panda!

Po:
Get ready to feel the THUNDA!

Po:
Uh, are they gonna watch, or should I just wait until they get back to work or somethin'?

Po:
Okay.

Po:
What was that?

Po:
HA! How's tha--

Po:
You want it? Come and get it.

Po:
You've never seen Bear Style!

Po:
Right.

Po:
[Talking with his mouth full] Don't tell Monkey.

Po:
There is no secret ingredient. It's just you.

Po:
Buddy, I am the Dragon Warrior!

Po:
Whoa, the Furious Five! You're so much bigger than your action figures! Except for you, Mantis. You're about the same.

Shifu:
This is no longer your home, and I am no longer your master.

Shifu:
Obeying your master is not weakness!

Shifu:
The panda? Master, that panda is not the Dragon Warrior. He wasn't even meant to be here. It was an accident.

Shifu:
And it was my pride... that blinded me. I loved you too much to see what you were becoming. What I... was turning you into. I'm-- I'm sorry.

Shifu:
So you are the legendary Dragon Warrior, hmm?

Shifu:
Don't cry.

Shifu:
Master!

Shifu:
Yes, the panda!

Shifu:
I don't know! [Calms down] I don't know.

Shifu:
Hit it.

Shifu:
This battle is between you and me.

Shifu:
Master, your vision... your vision was right. Tai Lung has broken out of prison! He's on his way!

Shifu:
That is how it must be.

Shifu:
Very good, students... if you were trying to disappoint me.

Shifu:
You were not meant to be the Dragon Warrior!

Shifu:
Just hit it.

Shifu:
You will never have that scroll, Tai Lung!

Shifu:
This'll be easier than I thought.

Shifu:
There is now a level 0.

Shifu:
[Irritated] Would you hit it?!

Shifu:
Why don't you try again? A little harder.

Furious Five:
[When Po becomes the Dragon Warrior] WHAT?!

Furious Five:
You don't belong here.

Furious Five:
Don't try and stop me!

Furious Five:
Master, are you pointing at me?

Furious Five:
OH! THAT IS IT!

Furious Five:
Master. [Bows to Po, and the others soon join in; Tigress then smiles at Po]

Furious Five:
The panda?!

Furious Five:
If he was smart, he wouldn't come back up those stairs.

Furious Five:
This is what you trained us for.

Furious Five:
But he won't.

Furious Five:
Po?

Tai Lung:
You knew I was the Dragon Warrior! You always knew. But, when Oogway said otherwise, what did you do? What did you do?! Nothing!

Tai Lung:
Fly back there and tell them... the real Dragon Warrior is coming home.

Tai Lung:
[Noticing the scroll's blank surface] It's nothing!

Tai Lung:
You? [To Shifu] Him?! He's a panda! [To Po] You're a panda! What are you going to do, big guy? Sit on me?! [Chuckles]

Tai Lung:
So... that is how it's going to be...

Tai Lung:
I don't want your apology. I want my scroll!

Tai Lung:
Shifu taught you well. [Blocks Monkey's chi] But he didn't teach you everything. [Blocks the rest of the Five's chi]

Tai Lung:
So that is his name. Po... Finally! A worthy opponent! OUR BATTLE WILL BE LEGENDARY!

Tai Lung:
[Pointing at Master Shifu] Not your fault?!

Tai Lung:
Give me the scroll!

Tai Lung:
I have come home... master.

Tai Lung:
You... can't defeat me!... You're just a big-fat-Panda!

Tai Lung:
Oh, yes! You have a new favorite. So where is this... Po? [Chuckles] Did I scare him off?

Tai Lung:
[Gasps] The Wuxi Finger Hold!

Tai Lung:
You're bluffing. You're bluffing! Shifu didn't teach you that.

Tai Lung:
Who filled my head with dreams? Who drove me to training until my bones cracked? WHO DENIED ME MY DESTINY?!

Mr. Ping:
[When Po is chosen as the Dragon Warrior] WHAT?!

Mr. Ping:
Service with a smile!

Mr. Ping:
Can you imagine me making tofu?! [Chuckles at the thought]

Mr. Ping:
Sorry doesn't make the noodles!

Mr. Ping:
To make something special, you just have to believe it's special.

Oogway:
One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.

Oogway:
[Repeated lines] There are no accidents.

Oogway:
I sense the Dragon Warrior is among us

Oogway:
Your mind is like this water my friend, when it is agitated it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear.

Oogway:
Quit. Don't quit. Noodles. Don't noodles. You are too concerned with what was and what will be. There's a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called a "present".

Oogway:
[Last words] You must... believe.

Oogway:
[Shifu ask for help] No, you just need to believe.

Oogway:
Ah, Shifu. There is just news. There is no good or bad.

Oogway:
That is bad news... if you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.

(Po tries to take a vow of silence, when he realises he can't keep it up then...)

Po:
They're right! I can't do this... I'm a blabber-mouth, a chatter-box, a yack-idy, whack-idy, a fluger-meister!

Mantis:
A fluger-what????

Po:
I don't know!!! See!!! I talk so much I have to make up new words!

Shifu:
I... I... have... it's... it's very bad news.

Oogway:
Aah, Shifu. There's just news. There's no good or bad.

Shifu:
Master, your vision... your vision was right. Tai Lung has broken out of prison! He's on his way!

Oogway:
That is bad news... if you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.

Shifu:
The panda? Master, that panda is not the Dragon Warrior. He wasn't even meant to be here. It was an accident.

Oogway:
There are no accidents.

Shifu:
[Sighs] Yes, I know. You said that already... twice.

Oogway:
Well, that was no accident either.

Shifu:
... Thrice.

Oogway:
My friend, the panda will never fulfill his destiny, nor you yours, until you let go of the illusion of control.

Shifu:
Illusion?

Oogway:
Yes. Look at this tree, Shifu. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before it's time.

Shifu:
But there are things we can control. [Kicks the tree causing several peaches to fall] I can control when the fruit will fall. [One hits him on the head. Oogway chuckles] And I can control... [Tosses the peach in the air and chops it in half] ...where to plant the seed. [Punches a hole in the ground and catches the seed] That is no illusion, Master. [Throws the seed into the hole]

Oogway:
Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.

Shifu:
But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!

Oogway:
Maybe it can. [Covers the seed in dirt] If you are willing to guide it, to nurture it. To believe in it.

Shifu:
But how? How? I need your help, master.

Oogway:
No. You just need to believe. Promise me, Shifu. Promise me you will believe.

Shifu:
I... I will try.

Oogway:
Good. [Sees petals floating around him] My time has come. You must continue your journey without me. [Hands Shifu his staff]

Shifu:
What... What are you...? [Oogway backs into the swirling petals] Master, you can't leave me!

Oogway:
[Starts to vanish] You must believe.

[Po sees the Furious Five up close for the first time, watching him with curious expressions]

Po:
Whoa, the Furious Five! You're so much bigger than your action figures! Except for you, Mantis. You're about the same.

[Mantis gives Po a glare as one of his antennae twitches.]

Shifu:
Go ahead, Panda. Show us what you can do.

Po:
[uneasily] Uh, are they gonna watch, or should I just wait until they get back to work or somethin'?

Shifu:
Hit it.

Po:
[stalling] Yeah, well, I just ate, so I'm still digesting, so my Kung Fu may not be as good as... later on...

Shifu:
Just hit it.

Po:
Uh, okay. [looks over at the training dummy] What'cha got? You got nothing, cause I got it right here. You pickin' on my friends? [quickly shuffles his feet] Get ready to feel the thunder, I'm comin' at you with the crazy feet. What'cha gonna do about crazy feet? Come on. I'm a blur, I'm a blur. You've never seen bear style, you've only seen praying mantis. Or monkey-style.

[He starts chattering like a monkey; Monkey raises his eyebrows]

Po:
Or snickety-snake--

Shifu:
[annoyed] Would you hit it?!

Po:
[stops]All right.(annoyed)

[He gives the dummy a little tap with his fist, making it lean back.]

Shifu:
Why don't you try again? A little harder?

[Po punches the dummy, sending it hurtling backwards.]

Po:
Ha! How's tha--?

[The dummy swings back, knocking his tooth out and sending him flying into the training hall's obstacle course. The Five start forward, but Shifu holds up his hand to stop them.]

Po:
(accidentally does a split on the moving ropes) Oh, that hurts!

[A spiked pendulum swings towards him and hits him square in the face, knocking him into Crane's tilting bowl, hitting his head several times]

Shifu:
[very amused] This'll be easier than I thought.

[Po spills out of the tilting bowl, and wanders to the moving arm guard section]

Po:
Feeling a little nauseous.

[He pushes one arm, starting a chain reaction that causes him to get hit repeatedly in the face, belly, legs, arms...]

Po:
Ow! Oh, those are hard...!

[...then in the scrotum.]

Po:
Ooh-hoo-hoo! [drops to knees, rises and covers crotch] My tenders!

[In pain, he rests one hand on a moving arm, starting the whole chain reaction over again, and smacking him into the fire floor area.]

Po:
Uh-oh.

[Cut back to Shifu and the Furious Five who wince and look away as we hear fire burning and Po screaming. He slumps over next to Shifu, burnt and charred.]

Po:
How did I do?

Shifu:
There is now a Level Zero.

[He snuffs out a flame on top of Po's head.]

(Trying to get to his room without waking anyone, Po tiptoes through the hallway, only to trip and walk into Crane's room)

Po:
Hi, you're, uh, you're up.

Crane:
Am now.

Po:
I was just--some day, huh? That Kung Fu stuff is hard work, right? Ur biceps sore?

Crane:
(looks at his arms awkwardly) Uh, I've had a long and rather disappointing day. So, yeah. I should probably get to sleep now.

Po:
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

Crane:
OK, thanks.

Po:
It's just-- Man, I'm such a big fan! You guys were totally amazing at the Battle of the Weeping River. Outnumbered a thousand and one, but you didn't stop. And you just--

[He tries Kung Fu, only to accidentally kick a hole in the wall, leading to Monkey's room; Po peaks into the hole to see Monkey, who is now glaring at him]

Po:
Oh, sorry about that.

Crane:
Uh, look, you don't belong here.

Po:
(sighs in disappointment) I know. I know. You're right. I don't have--I just--my whole life, I've dreamed of--

Crane:
No, no, no. I meant you don't belong here. I mean, in this room. This is my room. (softly taps his bed with his foot) Property of Crane.

Po:
Okay. Right, right. So, yeah, you wanna get to sleep and I'm keeping you up. We get big things tomorrow. All right. You are awesome. Last thing I wanna say. Bye-bye.

[He leaves, but remains outside the door, making Crane sigh in annoyance]

Crane:
Oy.

Po:
(peeks his head in) What was that?

Crane:
I didn't say anything.

Po:
Okay. All right. Good night. Sleep well.

[Po closes the door and Crane puts his foot on his head]

Po:
That seemed a bit awkward.

[Po tries to get to his room despite the creaking noise; Tigress opens her doors angrily]

Po:
Master Tigress! I didn't mean to wake you, just, uh--

Tigress:
You do not belong here.

Po:
Yeah, yeah, of course, this is your room.

Tigress:
I mean you don't belong in the Jade Palace. You're a disgrace to Kung Fu, and if you have any respect for who we are and what we do, you will be gone by morning.

[She slams her doors closed. Po, clearly hurt by her words, gropes for a response.]

Po:
[weakly] Big fan...

(Po is making dinner for The Furious Five)

Po:
So I'm like "Fine. You may be a wolf. You may be the scariest bandit in the Hajin Province, but you're a lousy tipper!"

Crane:
Really? So how'd you get out of there alive?

Po:
I mean, I didn't actually say that... but I thought it... in... in my mind. If he could read my mind he woulda been like "What?" Order up. (passes out bowls of soup to four of the Five) Think you'll like it? (watches patiently)

Mantis:
This is really good!

Po:
(sitting down) Nah, c'mon, you should try my dad's secret ingredient soup. He actually knows the secret ingredient.

Viper:
What are you talking about? This is amazing!

Crane:
Wow, you're a really good cook!

(Po looks a bit sheepish, wondering if his old life really could influence his new.)

Mantis:
I wish my mouth was bigger!

Monkey:
Tigress, you've got to try this.

Tigress:
Hmmm. (picking up a cube of tofu with her chopsticks, the only one of the five without noodles) It is said that the Dragon Warrior can survive for months at a time on nothing but the dew of a single Ginko leaf and the energy of the universe.

(The Five realize Po's been shot down yet again.)

Po:
I guess my body doesn't know it's the Dragon Warrior yet, heh heh. I'm gonna need a lot more than dew, and, uh, universe juice.

(Po slurps his noodles, with one hanging over his nose; Mantis snickers)

Po:
What?

Mantis:
Oh, nothing.. .Master Shifu. (everyone, except Tigress, begin to chuckle)

Po:
(impersonating Master Shifu) You will never be the Dragon Warrior unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth. (The Furious Five, except Tigress, laugh) What is that noise you're making? Laughter? I have never heard of it! Work hard, Panda, and maybe someday.... you will have ears like mine! (he brings two bowls up to his head to mimic ears; the Five laugh, then immediately stop, with shocked expressions) Ears. It's not working for ya? I thought they're pretty good...

Monkey:
(whispering) It's Shifu!

Po:
Of course it's Shifu, who do you think I'm doing?

(The Five stare at Po shockingly; Monkey points at the door. Po looks and sees Shifu with Oogway's staff.)

Po:
Oh, Master Shifu! Uh.... (slurps the noodle and accidentally presses the bowls to his chest so he looks like he has on a bikini top. The Five, except Tigress, snicker.)

Shifu:
(angrily) You think this is funny? Tai Lung has escaped from prison, and you're acting like children!

Po:
What?

Shifu:
He is coming for the Dragon Scroll! (To Po) And you are the only one who can stop him!

Po:
(After his bowls fall to the ground, then laughs) And here I am saying you got no sense of humor! (Shifu looks at him deadly serious.) I'm gonna.... stop Tai Lung. What? You're serious? And I have to.... Uh, no-uh, Master Oogway will stop him! He did it before, he'll do it again!

Shifu:
(Shakes his head) Oogway cannot! (Face softens and he stares sadly at his master's staff.) Not anymore. (The Five gasp in shock, realizing Oogway is gone) Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.

Tigress:
The panda?

Shifu:
Yes, the panda! (With conviction due to Oogway's last charge on him before he died)

Tigress:
Master, please! [pushes her chair out] Let us stop Tai Lung. This is what you've trained us for!

Shifu:
No! It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung, it is his! [points at Po, then realizes he's not there] Where'd he go?

(Shifu and Tai Lung fight in the Jade Palace)

Tai Lung:
I rotted in jail for twenty years... because of your weakness.

Shifu:
Obeying your master isn't weakness!

Tai Lung:
You knew I was the Dragon Warrior. (Flashback ensues; 20 years ago, in the exact same spot in the Hall of Warriors; Tai Lung awaits Shifu and Oogway's evaluation; Tai Lung proudly believes he will receive the dragon scroll) You always knew. But, when Oogway said otherwise (Oogway turns to Shifu and shakes his head in refusal, and walks away. Shifu is about to say something, but remains silent out of respect for his master) ...what did you do? (Tai Lung cannot believe what he is hearing and seeing) What did you do?! (Scene returns to present; Tai Lung is furious) Nothing!

Shifu:
You were not meant to be the Dragon Warrior! That was not my fault!

Tai Lung:
(going into a rage) Not your fault?! (Angrily knocks down Master Flying Rhino's armor) Who filled my head with dreams?! (Starts throwing weapons at Shifu) Who drove me to train until my bones cracked?! WHO DENIED ME MY DESTINY?!? (Launches a volley of blades at Shifu, who deflects all of them with ease, but barely countering the last one)

Shifu:
(Successfully driving last blade into the ground) It was never my decision to make!

(Tai Lung growls and leaps to Oogway's shrine. He finally realizes that Oogway is gone and picks up the deceased master's staff.)

Tai Lung:
(Holds the staff out to Shifu) It is now. (angered, Shifu charges Tai Lung, hitting him before Tai Lung uses the curved end of Oogway's staff to catch Shifu by the neck and pin him to the ground.) Give me the scroll!

Shifu:
I would rather die!

(Tai Lung growls, then tries to kill Shifu with Oogway's staff. Shifu pushes against it, and the staff breaks in half and clutters away. They fight some more, until Tai Lung evetually gains the upper hand.)

Tai Lung:
(furiously pummelling Shifu) All I ever did, I did to make you proud! Tell me how proud you are, Shifu! Tell me! TELL ME! (his final blow sends Shifu flying across the room. He lands in a heap at the foot of the stairs)

Shifu:
(tired, solemn and sad) I have always been proud of you. From the first moment, I've been proud of you. And it was my pride, that blinded me; I loved you too much to see what you were becoming... what I was turning you into. I'm... I'm sorry.

(Tai Lung is taken aback for a moment, but recovers and seizes Shifu by the throat, holding him up in the air)

Tai Lung:
I don't want your apology; I want my scroll! (sees the Dragon Scroll is gone) Where is it?! (Slams Shifu to the floor)

Shifu:
(Trying his best to escape Tai Lung's grip around his neck.)The Dragon Warrior- has taken scroll halfway across China by now. (Coughs) You will never see that scroll, Tai Lung. (Tai Lung draws out his claws, ready to kill Shifu) Never! Never.... (Tai Lung snarls, about to lay down his death blow on his former master.)

Po:
(off-screen) Hey!

(Tai Lung stops and turns around. He sees Po standing with the dawn behind him at the entrance.... currently panting for breath)

Po:
Ugh, stairs. Ohhh.

Tai Lung:
Who are you?

Po:
(catching his breath) Buddy... I'm the Dragon Warrior. (Gasps one last time)

Tai Lung:
(disbelievingly) You? (to Shifu as he tosses him to the floor) Him? He's a panda. [To Po] You're a panda. What are you going to do, big guy? Sit on me? [Chuckles]

Po:
Don't tempt me. [laughs] Now, I'm gonna use this. [Holds up the Dragon Scroll] You want it? Come get it.

(Tai Lung is severely battered after being belly-bumped by Po and crashing through the ground like in many a classic cartoon)

Tai Lung:
[weakly] You... can't defeat me. You.... you're just a big... fat...panda.

(Po pinches his finger)

Po:
I'm not a big fat panda. I'm the big fat panda. (he lifts up his pinky finger)

Tai Lung:
[gasps] The Wuxi Finger Hold!

Po:
Oh, you know this hold?

Tai Lung:
You're bluffing. You're bluffing! Shifu didn't teach you that.

Po:
Nope. (Tai Lung smiles weakly) I figured it out. (Po then flexes his pinky finger, with Tai Lung's eyes widening in a "uh-oh" stare) Ska-doosh. (unleashes a rippling wave of light that vanquishes Tai Lung)

[Last lines. After defeating Tai Lung, Po rushes to check on Shifu, whom he finds unconscious.]

Po:
Master! Shifu, Shifu, are you okay?

Shifu:
(coughs) Po. You're alive. Or we're both dead.

Po:
No, Master, I didn't die... I defeated Tai Lung!

Shifu:
It is just as Oogway... foretold... You are the Dragon Warrior. (Po's smile disappears) You have brought peace... to this valley... And... and to me... Thank you...(sighs again) Thank you... Po... Thank you... Thank you... (Slowly lays his head down, as if dead)

Po:
(looks disbelievingly at his master) No! Master! Don't die, Shifu!

Shifu:
[wakes up angrily] I'm not dying, you idiot!... Uh, Dragon Warrior... (relaxes and folds his hands over his chest) I am simply at peace... Finally.

Po:
Ohhh...

Mantis:
There's no words.

Crane:
Not denying that.

Viper:
I don't understand what Master Oogway was thinking. The poor guy just gonna get himself killed.

Crane:
(mocking on Po's lack of skills) He is SO mighty, the Dragon Warrior! Fell out of the sky in the ball of fire!

Mantis:
When he walks, the very grounds shakes.

[the Furious Five laugh, except Tigress]

Tigress:
One would think that Master Oogway would choose someone who actually knew Kung Fu.

Crane:
Yeah, or could be at least touch his toes.

Monkey:
Or even see his toes

[the Furious Five laugh again]

Prepare For Awesomeness.

Experience The Pandamonium In IMAX.

Summertime Is Pandatime.

Mr. Ping:
C'mere! The secret ingredient is... Nothing!

Po:
Huh??...

Mr. Ping:
You heard me. Nothing! There is no secret ingredient.

Po:
Wait, wait.

Mr. Ping:
It's just plain old noodle soup.

Po:
You don't add some kind of special sauce or something.

Mr. Ping:
Don't have to.

Po:
To make something special... you just have to believe it is special.

Po:
[making dinner for The Furious Five] So, I'm like "Fine. You may be a wolf. You may be the scariest bandit in the Hajin Province, but you're a lousy tipper!"

Crane:
Really, so how'd you get out of there alive?

Po:
I mean, I didn't actually say that, but I thought it... in... in my mind. If he could read my mind, he woulda been like "What?". Order up! [passes out bowls of soup to four of the Five] Hope you like it. [watches patiently]

Mantis:
This is really good!

Po:
[sitting down] Nah, c'mon, you should try my dad's secret ingredient soup. He actually knows the secret ingredient.

Viper:
What are you talking about? This is amazing!

Crane:
Wow, you're a really good cook! [Po looks a bit sheepish, wondering if his old life really could influence his new.]

Mantis:
I wish my mouth was bigger!

Monkey:
Tigress, you've got to try this.

Tigress:
Hmmm. [picking up a cube of tofu with her chopsticks, the only one of the five without noodles] It is said that the Dragon Warrior can survive for months at a time on nothing, but the dew of a single Ginko leaf and the energy of the universe. [The Five realize Po's been shot down yet again.]

Po:
I guess my body doesn't know it's the Dragon Warrior yet, heh heh. I'm gonna need a lot more than dew, and... uh, universe juice. [slurps his noodles, with one hanging over his nose; Mantis snickers] What?

Mantis:
Oh, nothing... "Master Shifu". [everyone, except Tigress, begin to chuckle]

Po:
[impersonating Master Shifu] "You will never be the Dragon Warrior... unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth." [The Furious Five, except Tigress, laughs] "What is that noise you're making, laughter? I have never heard of it! Work hard, Panda, and maybe someday, you will have ears like mine!" [brings 2 bowls up to his head to mimic ears; the Five laugh, then immediately stop, with shocked expressions] Ears. It's not working for ya? I thought they're pretty good.

Monkey:
[whispering] It's Shifu!

Po:
Of course it's Shifu. Who do you think I'm doing? [The Five stare at Po shockingly; Monkey points at the door. Po looks and sees (the real) Shifu with Oogway's staff.] Oh... Master Shifu! Uh... [slurps the noodle and accidentally presses the bowls to his chest so he looks like he is wearing a bikini top. The Five, except Tigress, snicker.]

Shifu:
[angrily] You think this is funny? Tai Lung has escaped from prison, and you're acting like children!

Po:
What?

Shifu:
He is coming for the Dragon Scroll! [to Po] And you are the only one who can stop him!

Po:
[After his bowls fall to the ground, then laughs] And here I am saying you got no sense of humor! [Shifu looks at him deadly serious.] I'm gonna... stop Tai Lung. What, you're serious, and I have to? Uh, no... Uh, Master Oogway will stop him! He did it before, he'll do it again!

Shifu:
[Shakes his head] Oogway cannot! [Face softens and he stares sadly at his master's staff.] Not anymore (in fact). [The Five gasp in shock, realizing Oogway is gone] Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.

Tigress:
The panda?

Shifu:
Yes, the panda! [With conviction due to Oogway's last charge on him before he died]

Tigress:
Master, please! [pushes her chair out] Let us stop Tai Lung. This is what you've trained us for!

Shifu:
No! It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung, it is his! [points at Po, who's NOT there] Where'd he go? [Scenes to Cut outside Po running down the stairs and Shifu stops Po from leaving] You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!

Po:
Watch me! [Po tries to run past Shifu, but was pushed away] Come on! How am I supposed to defeat Tai Lung? I can't even beat you to the stairs.

Shifu:
You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior! [Pokes Po in the stomach]

Po:
Ow! You don't believe that! [Shifu swings his arm around] You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me!

Shifu:
[Po tries to run past Shifu, but was pushed away again] Yes, I was, but now I ask you to trust in your master as I have come to trust in mine.

Po:
You're not my master. [Po shoves the staff away from his face.] And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.

Shifu:
Then why didn't you quit?! You knew I was trying to get rid of you, and yet you stayed!

Po:
Yeah, I stayed. [stands up] I stayed because though every time you threw a brick at my head or said I smelled, it hurt, but it could never hurt more than it did every day of my life just being me. [Po Pauses. Shifu is in a stunned silence] I stayed because I thought if anyone could change me... could make me... not me, it was you, the greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!

Shifu:
But I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior, and I will!

Po:
Oh, come on! Tai Lung is on his way here right now, and even if it takes him 100 years to get here, how are you... gonna change this into the Dragon Warrior?! Huh? [Shifu is speechless] How... how...? HOW?!

Shifu:
[snaps and yells out answer in frustration] I DON'T KNOW! (Shifu calms down a bit, then he sighs deeply, realizing what he means) I don't know.

Po:
[his anger turns to sadness] That's what I thought.

Tigress:
[watch Po sadly and Shifu walk away and jump] This what you trained me for. [Keeps going. The rest of the Furious Five follow her]

Viper:
[Now caught up with Tigress] Tigress!

Tigress:
Don't try to stop them!

Viper:
We're not trying to stop him.

Tigress:
What?

Viper:
We're coming with you.

[The monkey thumb up and the furious five and jump into the moon, The next morning, Shifu felt alone, and they heard Po karate, Shifu go inside and looking for Po. Shifu walks in to see Po in the kitchen, having just punched through a wood cupboards and is currently eatings its contents]

Po:
[Sees Shifu and stops; Shifu look arounds the kitchen, where shelves are broken, cupboards have holes in them, and Po’s still got food in his hands] What? [angrily] I eat when I'm upset, okay!

Shifu:
Oh, no need to explain. [Start to turn away, then turn back] I just thought you might be Monkey, he hides almond cookies on the top shelf.

[He pretends to walk off and instead leans against the wall beside the doorway, hearing a bit scuffling. When he looks in, Po is ten feet above the ground, doing a perfect split to keep himself airborne and currently shoveling Monkey’s almond cookies into his face. With a mixture of surprise and realization, Shifu examines Po. After a minute, Po sees Shifu.]

Po:
[With cookies in his mouth] Don’t tell monkey.

Shifu:
[in astonishment] Look at you.

Po:
Yeah, I know, I disgust you.

Shifu:
No, no, I mean, how did you get up there?

Po:
[taking a few more cookies] I don’t know. I just- I don’t know. I was getting a cookie.

Shifu:
And yet, you are ten feet off the ground, and have done a perfect split.

[Last lines. After defeating Tai Lung, Po rushes to check on Shifu, whom he finds unconscious.]

Po:
Master, Shifu! Shifu, are you okay?

Shifu:
[coughs] [weakly] Po, you're alive... or we're both dead.

Po:
No, Master, I didn't die, I defeated Tai Lung.

Shifu:
You did? [Po nods] Wow. It is just as Oogway... foretold. You are the Dragon Warrior. (Po's smile disappears) You have brought peace... to this valley. And... and to me. Thank you. (sighs again) Thank you, Po. Thank you. Thank you. [Slowly lays his head down, as if dead]

Po:
[looks disbelievingly at his master] No! Master! No, no, no! Don't die, Shifu, Please!

Shifu:
[wakes up and eyes snap open angrily] I'm not dying, you idiot-- [humorously calms down] Uh, Dragon Warrior. [relaxes and folds his hands over his chest] I am simply at peace. Finally.

Po:
Ohhh. So, um, I should stop talking?

Shifu:
[nodding his head, smiling] If you can.

Po:
[joins Shifu for a nap, and after a long nap, he ask something to his master] You want to get something to eat?

[Shifu wakes up and sighs in annoyance]

Shifu:
[nonchalantly] Yeah.

Mr. Ping:
Po, what are you doing up there?

Po:
Uh, nothing.

[Film starts in a 2D-style animation]

Po as a narrator of his dream:
Legend tells of a legendary warrior whose kung fu skills were the stuff of legend. He travelled the land in search of worthy foes.

Bull criminal:
I see you like to chew. Maybe you should chew… ON MY FIST! [slams his fist on the table]

Po as a narrator of his dream:
The warrior said nothing for his mouth was full. Then he swallowed, and then he spoke.

Po:
Enough talk, let's fight! SHA-BAA-BOOOEEEE!

Po as a narrator of his dream:
He was so deadly, in fact, his enemies would go blind from over exposure to pure awesomeness!

Leopard criminal:
MY EYES!

Crocodile criminal:
HE'S TOO AWESOME!

Female bunny:
And attractive.

Male bunny:
How can we repay you?

Po:
There's no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.

Female bunny:
[Giggles]

Po:
KABLOOEY!

Po as a narrator of his dream:
It mattered not how many foes he faced. They were no match for his bodacity.

Po:
KIAI.

Po as a narrator of his dream:
NEVER BEFORE had a panda been so feared, and so loved. Even the most heroic heroes in all of China, THE FURIOUS FIVE. Bowed in respect to this great master.

Monkey:
We should hang out.

Po:
Agreed.

Po as a narrator of his dream:
But hanging out would have to wait. Because when you're facing the 10,000 demons of Demon Mountain, there's only one thing that matters and that's...

[Po's dream is interrupted by Mr. Ping]

Mr. Ping:
Po.

Mr. Ping as Monkey:
Get up.

Mr. Ping as Tigress:
You'll be late for work.

Po:
Huh? [falls out of his dream, lands on the floor in his room and wakes up in 3D-style animation]

Po:
[dazed from falling] Oh. What's going on? Where? [sees Oogway pointing his finger at him] What are you pointing…? Oh! Okay. Sorry, I just wanted to see who the Dragon Warrior was.

Oogway:
How interesting.

Tigress:
Master, are you pointing at me?

Oogway:
Him.

Po:
Who? [moves around as Oogway's finger follows him, still pointing at him]

Oogway:
You.

Po:
Me?

Oogway:
[lifts Po's arm up with his staff] The universe has brought us the Dragon Warrior!

Po:
What?

Furious Five:
What?!

Shifu:
What?!

Mr. Ping:
What?!

Viper:
What do we do now, Master, with the panda gone? Who will be the Dragon Warrior?

Shifu:
All we can do is resume our training and trust that in time, the true Dragon Warrior will be revealed. [opens the training courtyard doors, only to find himself face-to-face with Po, spreading out his legs wide apart on two training horses] What are you doing here?!

Po:
[sees Shifu and the Five staring at him] Hi! Good morning, Master! I just thought I'd warm up a little.

Shifu:
You're stuck.

Po:
Stuck? Nah. What? Stuck? Nah. This is one of my... Yeah, I'm stuck.

Shifu:
[to Crane] Help him.

Crane:
Oh, dear.

Po:
I know Master Shifu's trying to inspire me and all, but if I didn't know any better, I'd say he was trying to get rid of me. [chuckles awkwardly]

Mantis:
I know he can seem kind of heartless… [jabs another acupuncture needle in Po] but he wasn't always like that.

Viper:
According to legend, there was once a time when Master Shifu actually used to smile.

[Tigress walks down the bunkhouse hall and stops outside of Po's room when she overhears Po, Viper, and Mantis talking]

Po:
No.

Mantis:
Yes.

Viper:
But that was before.

Po:
Before what?

Tigress:
[enters] Before Tai Lung.

Crane:
Uh, yeah, we're not really supposed to talk about him.

Tigress:
Well, if he's going to stay here, he should know.

Po:
Guys, guys, I know about Tai Lung. He was a student. The first ever to master the thousand scrolls of kung fu. [nervously as Tigress stares piercingly at him] And then he turned bad, and now he's in jail.

Tigress:
He wasn't just a student. [flashback begins to a younger Shifu stepping out of the training hall courtyard and finds baby Tai Lung, wrapped in cloth; voiceover] Shifu found him as a cub… and he raised him as his son. And when the boy showed talent in kung fu… Shifu trained him. He believed in him. He told him he was destined for greatness. It was never enough for Tai Lung. He wanted the Dragon Scroll. But Oogway saw darkness in his heart and refused. [Tai Lung then rampages the valley, causing an outrageous swath of destruction in fury] Outraged, Tai Lung laid waist to the valley. [Tai Lung crashes through the doors and into the Hall of Warriors as he returns to the Jade Palace] He tried to take the scroll by force. And Shifu had to destroy what he had created. [Shifu leaps at Tai Lung to give him a kick but only visions him as a baby at the last second] But how could he? [Tai Lung strikes Shifu and he crashes to the ground with a broken leg, then leaps for the Dragon Scroll, but Oogway intercepts and strikes his pressure points, making him fall to the ground in a heap; Shifu stares in sadness and disbelief, then crawls over to Tai Lung but is unable to touch him] Shifu loved Tai Lung like he had never loved anyone before. Or since. [back to the present; everyone is quiet] And now, he has a chance to make things right, to train the true Dragon Warrior. And he's stuck with you. A big, fat panda who treats it like a joke. [Po makes a weird sound and a weird face; angrily] Oh, that is it! [raises her paw, intending to strike Po]

Mantis:
[quickly appears from behind Po's back and lands on his nose] Wait! My fault! I accidentally tweaked his facial nerve! [Po falls over and reveals a lot of acupuncture needles in his back and one on his neck] And may have also stopped his heart. [taps Po twice with no response]

Crane:
[to Shifu; exhausted and out of breath from carrying the others back after their fight with Tai Lung] We were no match for his nerve attack.

Shifu:
He has gotten stronger. [presses some pressure points on Mantis' chest, reviving him]

Po:
Who? Tai Lung? Stronger? [gets punched in the face by Monkey after Shifu revives him]

Monkey:
He's too fast! Sorry, Po.

Tigress:
[as Shifu revives her; ashamed] I thought we could stop him.

Shifu:
He could have killed you.

Mantis:
Why didn't he?

Shifu:
[while reviving Viper] So you could come back here and strike fear into our hearts. But it won't work.

Po:
Uh… It might. I mean, a little. I'm pretty scared.

Shifu:
You can defeat him, panda!

Po:
Are you kidding? If they can't? They're five masters. I'm just one me.

Shifu:
But you will have the one thing that no one else does.

Tai Lung:
Finally! Oh, yes. The power of the Dragon Scroll is... mine! [opens the Dragon Scroll, but finds only nothing but the golden reflection] It's nothing!

Po:
[getting up] It's okay. I didn't get it the first time, either.

Tai Lung:
[confused] What?

Po:
There is no secret ingredient. [Tai Lung throws the Dragon Scroll to the ground in frustration] It's just you. [looks down at the golden reflection and smiles]

Po:
Enough talk, let's fight!

Po:
Dumpling is the only way to sort out problems.

Po:
[looking at the Sword of Heroes while looking around in the Sacred Hall of Warriors] The Sword of Heroes! Said to be so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking… Ow!

Po:
I probably sucked more today than anyone in the history of kung fu. In the history of China. In the history of sucking!

Po:
I thought you said acupuncture would make me feel better.

Po:
They're five masters. I'm just one me. [Shifu: But you will have the one thing that no one else does.]

Shifu:
[first lines; to the Furious Five] Well done, students… if you were trying to disappoint me. [points his flute at the Five, all bowing respectfully as he mentions their name] Tigress, you need more ferocity! Monkey, greater speed. Crane, height. Viper, subtlety. Mantis... [Zeng: Master Shifu.] What?! [points his flute at Zeng] [Zeng: It's Master Oogway. He wants to see you.]

Shifu:
Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limitless power? To become... the Dragon Warrior?

Shifu:
Citizens of the Valley of Peace, it's my great honor to present you, Tigress, Viper, Crane, Monkey and Mantis! The Furious Five!

Shifu:
[to Oogway after Po is unexpectedly chosen as the Dragon Warrior] Master Oogway, wait! That flabby panda can't possibly be the answer to our problem. You were about to point at Tigress and that thing fell in front of her! That was just an accident!

Shifu:
Go ahead, panda. Show us what you can do.

Shifu:
The only souvenirs we collect here are bloody knuckles and broken bones.

Shifu:
Would whoever is making that flapping sound quiet down?

Shifu:
But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!

Shifu:
[to Po] Do you want to learn kung fu? [Po: Yeah!] Then I am your master!

Shifu:
It was never my decision to make!

Shifu:
I'm not dying, you idiot!

Tai Lung:
Where's the Dragon Warrior?

Tai Lung:
You think I'm a fool? I know you're not the Dragon Warrior. None of you! I heard how he fell out of the sky in a ball of fire, that he's a warrior unlike anything the world has ever seen.

Tai Lung:
I rotted in jail for 20 years because of your weakness!

Tai Lung:
[while fighting with Po down the steps for the Dragon Scroll] That scroll is MINE!

Tai Lung:
[sees Po climbing to the Dragon Scroll] The scroll has given him power! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Tai Lung:
Finally! Oh, yes. The power of the Dragon Scroll is... mine! [opens the Dragon Scroll and only finds nothing but the golden reflection] It's nothing!