H2O: Just Add Water, Season 1

Rikki:
Zane Bennett's a pig. Anything I can do to get under his skin can't be a bad thing, can it?

Cleo:
Hey Emma, want a ride?

Emma:
Are you licenced?!

Rikki:
Are you my mother?

[After the Zodiac breaks down]

Emma:
Are we chilled out yet?

Rikki:
So, we're floating, it's not like we're sinking.

Emma:
Not yet.

Cleo:
Emma's always really prepared.

Rikki:
I'm so happy for her.

Emma:
What are you doing here?

Rikki:
Well you came down.

Emma:
You were meant to stay up top and throw down a rope or something.

Rikki:
What am I, a mindreader, and what rope?

Emma:
Our secret. Our responsibility. Whatever happens we're in this together.

Rikki:
That doesn't mean we're married, does it?

Emma:
[laughs] Now that was actually funny.

Lewis:
Rikki, can I sit?

Rikki:
I certainly hope so, just not with me. [pushes the magazine she was reading on to a seat]

Lewis:
I know we've had our differences. Um, thanks (to waiter) but I want to know what's wrong with Cleo.

Rikki:
What makes you think there's anything wrong?

Lewis:
Well, I've asked her to go to Miriam's party like a hundred times and every time she's changed her mind.

Rikki:
Maybe she doesn't like you. Did you think about that?.

Lewis:
Yes, actually that did cross my mind. But then I thought: Oh no, no, she hangs round with you so her standards must be pretty low.

Miriam:
Sick people make me feel... well, sick.

Lewis:
Well I might just join you all for a swim then.

Rikki:
We're naked Lewis.

Lewis:
Just a... quick dip then?

Emma:
Goodbye Lewis.

Lewis:
The offer was there.

[After vaporizing Miriam's pool]

Rikki:
Never liked pool parties anyway!

[to Emma and Rikki about Cleo going to Miriam's pool party]

Lewis:
I am not some lackey, I am not some all purpose-servant. You really think you can tell me what to do and I'll jump...her phone's off.

[about Byron when he leaves]

Emma:
Nice board.

Cleo:
Nice pecs.

Rikki:
Nice attitude.

Cleo:
What's going on?

Emma:
We've been... you know... swimming.

Rikki It's the best thing, the reef is out of this world!

Cleo:
That's great, so has anyone been able to do that calculus homework? Question 7's a nightmare.

Lewis:
Rikki and Emma told me about your dad.

Cleo:
Great! So now the whole world know my dad's a criminal. What would you do Lewis?

Lewis:
I'd change my name and go to the country, but that's just me.

Cleo:
You're no help.

Cleo:
He denied everything, it's really awful. I mean what could I say? "I know you're lying dad 'cause my mermaid friends saw you fishing close to the nesting beach."

Rikki:
He was using illegal nets too.

Emma:
It's true, and they didn't have those grid things in them.

Cleo:
This just gets worse and worse.

Cleo:
Look, I don't care about you frolicking with the dolphins -

Rikki:
Hey, I don't frolic. I glide.

Lewis:
Cleo, you're a really amazing girl.

Cleo:
Lewis, just because I've got these powers, doesn't mean I'm amazing. (walks away)

Lewis:
(to himself) I didn't mean the powers.

[On the phone]

Cleo:
So have you decided what time for the party tonight? ...

Emma:
I know, but... I just don't see how I can have the party this year. Not with recent developments... Your new job! ...The dolphin tank at the Marine Park.

Cleo:
Emma! This is tradition we're talking about!

Lewis:
The what?!

Cleo:
Yes of course the tank's full of water Emma, they're aquatic mammals... Yes I DO remember what water does to me, but I'm not going to let that ruin my life.

Emma:
[holding the locket] This might be safer with you.

Cleo:
With me? no you found it.

Emma:
And I nearly managed to get it stolen. I know how much you like it. Here.

Cleo:
You're sure?

Emma:
Anyone who can hide a mermaid tail in the middle of a party has got what it takes to look after that.

Emma:
Rikki, at least try and pretend you're having fun.

Rikki:
But I'm not.

Emma:
I can't go near the river as...

Lewis:
Yeah I know, the whole beach whale thing.

Emma:
Mermaid, Lewis.

Lewis:
Yes that is exactly what I meant.

Kim:
Lewis is one of them too.

Elliot:
I can't see Lewis... as a mermaid.

Kim:
No dork, he'd be a merman.

Cleo:
I'm a Portugese Man-Of-War.

[Audience doesn't react]

Cleo:
It's a jellyfish.[Everyone claps]

Emma:
Elliot, what's going on between you and Rikki?

Elliot:
Don't worry, I promise our love won't get in the way of your friendship.

Emma:
Come on, let's sit.

Emma:
Did he, you know see anything?

Rikki:
Other than when I flashed him?

[Emma gives Rikki a dirty look]

Rikki:
Lighten up, he doesn't suspect a thing.

[In the JuiceNet Cafe, it's come to light that Elliot has a crush on Rikki; Rikki, Emma and Cleo go to talk behind the pool table, as Elliot remains at their table]

Cleo:
It's so sweet! He has a crush on you!

Rikki:
[obviously put off by this revelation] Yeah, sweet like a lemon! [to Emma] Did you know about this?

Emma:
Well...not exactly. [Rikki looks out the window; Emma continues] Rikki, don't hurt his...

Rikki:
Don't even think about asking me to humour him. It's not gonna happen.

Emma:
Can you at least be gentle?

Cleo:
He's a sweet kid.

Rikki:
You're all disturbed! Why is everything sweet and nice all the time?

Emma:
Rikki, it's his first crush! Don't you remember what it was like to be a kid?

Rikki:
No, and besides, this is just...all because I saved his life. It's like pulling a thorn out of a dog's foot.

Emma:
And you'd do that gently, wouldn't you?

Rikki:
No! I'd do it fast, and hope I didn't get bitten. OK, I don't do the whole "relationship" thing very well.

Cleo:
It's not a relationship. He's eleven.

Rikki:
OK, I don't do the whole "people liking me" thing very well.

Emma:
What's there to do?

Rikki:
Fine, tell me what to say to get him off my case...and I'll say it.

[brief pause, Cleo thinks, shakes her head, and shrugs]

Cleo:
I've got nothing.

Emma:
Me either.

[Rikki walks into the JuiceNet Cafe; Emma and Cleo are already there, and have worried looks on their faces; Emma's arms are crossed]

Rikki:
Hey, guys, what's up?

Cleo:
We can't find Elliot.

Rikki:
He'll be around. Just...relax.

Emma:
He's not, Rikki. We've looked all over, and he's not anywhere. It's not like him to just disappear.

Rikki:
Have you told your parents?

Emma:
No way. They'd freak out. It's like he's run away. You know, he was acting all weird last night, not his usual, happy self.

[Rikki looks down at the floor, and starts rubbing her neck with her left hand]

Emma:
[she leans her head forward a bit] What?

Rikki:
Oh, no. [her sentence trails off from the start] It's probably just nothing...

Emma:
Rikki!

Rikki:
OK, I told him that I wasn't interested, but I think I was gentle.

[Emma and Cleo both glare at her, knowing she's not telling the truth; Rikki grimaces]

Rikki:
OK, OK. [as Rikki speaks, Emma closes her eyes, shakes her head, re-opens her eyes, and bites her lower lip in frustration] I told him that even if he was older, taller, and a lot less, I think the words were "squeaky clean," that I wouldn't be interested, and that he should just back off, and leave me alone.

Cleo:
Rikki!

Emma:
He's just a kid!

Rikki:
He kept bugging me!

Emma:
[finally uncrossing her arms] You keep acting like he's committing a crime for having a crush on you. [Emma sighs, shakes her head at Rikki, then briefly looks at Cleo before turning back to Rikki] We've gotta go find him before my parents find out, but if anything happens to him, it'll be your fault.

[Emma storms out; Cleo follows, shaking her head as she walks past Rikki; now guilt-ridden, Rikki turns around and sits at a table, leaning her chin on her hand; Lewis walks in, slaps a bucket hat down, and sits across from her]

Lewis:
Hey! [he notices Rikki's upset] Why the long face?

Rikki:
[quietly, with her chin still on her hand] Elliot.

Lewis:
Oh-ho-ho! Oh, lemme guess. You tried to let him down easy, and now he-he's mortally crushed.

Rikki:
[taking her chin off her hand] He's gone missing, Lewis. This is serious. Have you seen him anywhere?

Lewis:
No. No, I haven't. Not since Lenny's. Maybe you should try thinking like a little kid.

Rikki:
[scoffs] Easier said than done. Where would you hide if you were a little kid?

Lewis:
Somewhere you'd never find me.

[Rikki thinks hard, then smiles]

Rikki:
That's it!

[she gets up and dashes out of the cafe]

Lewis:
Wha-?! All right. [throwing his hands up] Be mysterious.

[when Elliot is saved by Rikki]

Elliot:
How did you do that?

Rikki:
Get on and shut up!

Emma:
Oh no, my tail!

Lewis:
See, that's why I'm hanging around with you guys. Cause all the other girls at school are like, oh no my make-up.

Rikki:
Well this is a valuable lesson. Next time Zane's drowning, don't help.

Lewis:
Zane's trying to track down a sea monster and he's offered me a job helping.

Rikki:
That you should take.

Lewis:
That's interesting logic... that could work.

Emma:
Hang on. Two steps back here.

Rikki:
Well, Zane's trying to track you down and you know how not to find us.

Emma:
Yeah, and Lewis could steer from any no-gone zones like Mako Island. This is good! Keep your friends close, keep your enemies out in the middle of the ocean

Zane:
I'm on a hunt and if I find what I'm looking for, I'll rewrite the history books.

Lewis:
Wilfred, just the man I wanted to see.

Wilfred:
This is the place to find me.

Lewis:
Yes a two part proposition.

Wilfred:
Try one to start

Lewis:
How many time have you actually spend on the waves since opening the business?

Wilfred:
Try none. Then what can you do? Business is business.

Lewis:
Well that's all about to change. Cause you're about to hire me... and spend the rest of the day at the beach.

Wilfred:
Lewis that's not a bad idea.

Lewis:
Yes. Get to it.

Emma:
Wait a minute, you call that a job interview?

Lewis:
Eh yeah work for me. Wilfred?

Wilfred:
Got all the information I need.

Emma:
No, you got to talk properly. You got ask him questions

Wilfred:
Like?

Emma:
Lewis, why do you want to work at the Juicenet Cafe?

Lewis:
I'm committed to providing fresh juice and friendly service to the masses and I need money quickly. Wilfred I am prepared to work for as little as 30 dollars.

Wilfred:
A day?

Lewis:
An hour.

Wilfred:
That's unrealistic Lewis.

Lewis:
Really? Well part two of my proposal will have to wait until I've got some money.

Zane:
Lewis! Buddy, just the guy I was looking for. See I've got a problem...

Lewis:
Well let me guess; You're self-centered, you're vain, you're disgustingly rich... Did you just call me buddy?

Zane:
Lewis, look in the past we haven't exactly seen things eye to eye.

Lewis No we haven't. I tend to see the glass as being half full, you tend to see the glass as being something to hit people with!

Zane You're trying to be funny right?

Lewis:
I know, it's wasted.

Cleo:
You're so devious, Zane.

Zane:
You say that like it's a negative.

Rikki:
Why would Cleo want to waste her breath talking to you?

Zane:
Well, she wastes it on you daily.

Lewis:
Don't go all independent-female on me, I just spent 40 dollars at the hardware store.

Lewis:
So that's the thanks I get? I gotta say it hurts, it hurts right here.

[Puts his hand to his chest]

[after Emma and Cleo leave to follow Rikki]

Lewis:
So much for independent women

Rikki:
Did I get a little too much moon last night?

Emma:
Yes, you could say that.

Cleo:
Can I get a padlock on my door?

Kim:
Can I get a new sister?

Kim:
Where'd you buy it?

Cleo:
Why?

Kim:
So I can return it!

[To Harrison Bennett]

Rikki:
I would like to say it's been a pleasure meeting you...but that would be a lie.

[To Zane]

Rikki:
Pretend I'm a painting you admire.

Zane:
A...painting??

Rikki:
Or a speedboat or some stupid car.

[To Rikki]

Zane:
What are you doing here?

Rikki:
What are YOU doing here?

Zane:
I asked first.

Rikki:
"I asked first", how old are you, ten?.

Rikki:
I'll think about it.

Zane:
Really?

Rikki:
No.

[Commenting on Rikki's dress]

Lewis:
It was red, it was elegant, it was sexy!

Cleo:
Elegant and sexy? That doesn't sound like Rikki.

Rikki:
I don't interfere with your lives, so stay out of mine. Maybe you could try showing a little trust!

It's Zane we don't trust. It's up to you to make a decision.

Rikki:
Between you two and Zane?

Cleo:
We can't let Zane get to us Rikki.

Emma:
We're your friends and YOU need to make a choice!

Rikki:
Friends don't give each other ultimatums.

[Rikki swims out of the moon pool]

Rikki:
So you're not going to ask me where I've been, who I've been with, what color bra I'm wearing?

Lewis:
Just out of curiosity, what color-

Cleo:
Lewis!

Dr.Denman:
Stay right were you are. We don't want to have to hurt you.

Rikki:
I wish we could say the same.

Emma:
But Miss Chatham was really clear. We gave away our powers.

Lewis:
Only for twelve hours.

Rikki:
What do you mean?

Lewis:
I... It's temporary. During a lunar eclipse the moon pool draws away your powers for twelve hours.

Emma:
She didn't say that.

Lewis:
She did to me. She said that if you guys believed that your powers were gone forever, so too would Dr. Denman. It's funny cause she told me not to tell you.

[Sees the girls glare at him angrily]

Lewis:
What's up?

[Cleo traps Lewis on a spout of water]

Lewis:
Come on, you can't do this! Where's your sense of humour!?

Emma:
Next time he better remember who his friends are.

Rikki:
Leave him up there for a couple of hours.

Lewis:
No no no no, don't you listen to her Cleo.

Cleo:
Yeah, no-one messes with mermaids.

[hearing the sound of the gate being dragged away]

Dr. Denman:
What was that?

Rikki:
that was the sound of good-bye!

Cleo:
Some of the turtles are still getting caught

Cleo's dad:
Well not by me