Shuffle!

Itsuki:
Good morning Kaede-chan. Your beauty is a crime. May I arrest you?

Mayumi:
That is the worst pick-up line I have ever heard in my life. Listen to what you just said!

Nadeshiko:
These two are the Kings of the Gods and the Devils. That means these girls here are... you understand what I mean, right Midoriba?

Itsuki:
Of course I understand. I'll make sure I make them happy.

Nadeshiko:
I'm telling you to stay away from them.

Rin:
At this particular moment, I'm most interested in... none of them.

Asa:
You mean.. you like someone else other than those three? Are your standards that high or something?

Rin:
What do you mean by that?

Kareha:
That means.. there's a chance that Asa-chan could be the one...

Rin & Asa:
What!?

Kareha:
Oh my! You guys are getting along so well!

Rin:
That's not the point...

Nerine:
Rin-sama seems to be busy, so I'll be fine...

Mayumi:
No, Rin-chan. I know someone will try and do something to you.

Itsuki:
It's okay. I'll come with you.

Mayumi:
See? Someone like this.

Itsuki:
Just count on me, Rin-chan. I'll escort her slowly and surely.

Mayumi:
We can't count on you! And what do you mean by 'slowly and surely' anyway?

Rin:
Kaede got sick. She was trying to come in regardless, so I had to tie her to the bed.

Itsuki:
You tied her up, huh?

Rin:
Mayumi, will you take care of this pervert?

Mayumi:
Sure! I'll tie you up over there if you want!

Itsuki:
Wait a minute, I like tying up the girls, but I don't know about being on the receiving end.

Mayumi:
Don't worry, the pain will eventually turn into pleasue!

[later]

Mayumi:
So how do you like this one?

Itsuki:
Wow! This is! I think I'm discovering a new world!

Nerine:
We should go somewhere with everyone else during the summer break!

Rin:
That sounds good. I think everyone's going to escape having extra lessons this year.

Sia:
[off screen] Kyaaa! I think I failed the English test!

Rin:
Where should we go? think we have a high chance that everyone's going to escape having extra lessons.

Nerine:
Right, I hope so...

Mayumi:
[off screen] Kaede! Can you tell me what I should study for tomorrow? I'm definitely getting bad grades on at least two of my exams.

Rin:
Well, we'll have a summer next year too...

Mayumi:
Anyway, I would like to plan an extreme pig-out party with the three princesses, Sia-chan, Rin-chan and Kaede.

Rin:
Hell no. I don't care if you become a pig or cow or hippo, but don't try and drag those three girls down with you.

Mayumi:
I think you just said something awful...

Itsuki:
Well, reality can be harsh.

[while shopping, Sia is being hit on by some delinquents]

Eustoma:
I'm going to go pay a visit real quick.

Rin:
With your fist?

Eustoma:
Watch these bags.

[at the cafe]

Rin:
Do you come here often?

Forbesii:
Yeah, I usually make it a point to stop here when I visit this world.

Rin:
It's because of the uniform, isn't it?

Forbesii:
Rin-chan, uniforms are the source of a cosmic mystery.

Eustoma:
Sia, have lots of fun. You don't have to come home until tomorrow morning, if you want.

Sia:
Huh? What are you talking about?

[after Rin overhears Nerine singing]

Nerine:
It's not nice of you to easedrop.

Rin:
I had to. If you saw me, you'd have stopped singing.

Nerine:
That's... true.

[Rin is playing against Mayumi and Kaede in volleyball]

Rin:
Two against one isn't fair!

Mayumi:
We're girls. We need some handicaps!

Rin:
You two are the top athletes in our class!

Mayumi:
Don't complain!

Forbesii:
It's Nerine-chan's cooking! No matter how much she tried, it never improved, BUT!

Rin:
Nerine's cooking?

Forbesii:
That's right! Nerine-chan's cooking! If this is a dream, I'll destroy a world or two in revenge!

Nerine:
Father! Please, stop. It's embarrassing.

Forbesii:
What are you talking about? If you're happy, you celebrate! You express it - doing so is vital. I don't mind making this day a Devils' holiday. Hey, that's a great idea!

Rin:
Why are we having a date on campus? Only delinquents and test thieves come to school on Sunday.

Reverse Sia:
Which one are we?

Rin:
I think delinquents are out of style these days, so we'll be test thieves.

[later]

Nadeshiko:
Oh, it's you, Tsucchi, Sia. I thought I heard voices. Are you on a secret mission or something?

Reverse Sia:
Yes, we're test thieves.

[Asa holds onto Rin's arm, pressing her breasts against it]

Asa:
I bet you'll be dreaming about this tonight, won't you?

[Rin steps in front Kaede and opens the classroom door. Itsuki jumps out.]

Itsuki:
Kaede! Come into my bosom!

[Itsuki attempts to hug Kaede, but ends up hugging Rin instead. Rin responds by slamming his fist into Itsuki's gut.]

Kaede:
Itsuki, um, what are you doing to Rin?

Rin:
Welcome to my fist, Itsuki.

Nerine:
Sia, let's enjoy the human world and go out to eat together.

Sia:
Tempura sushi!

Nerine:
That sounds great!

Sia:
Mt. Fuji!

Nerine:
Well, that...

Sia:
Geisha!

Nerine:
That sounds yummy.

Sia:
What? Is geisha really a food?

Nerine:
My father said it was.

Sia:
How neat. I really wish I could have a fan club like that.

Rin:
Trust me, you don't.

Itsuki:
Rin, you are such a lucky bastard.

[Scene cuts to Rin being chased by a mob of groupies]

Rin:
My luck sucks!

[Rin has come out from under a table where he was hiding from the groupies and during which, Asa held him in a position that caused him to unwittingly look up her skirt]

Asa:
Hey, uh, you didn't peek up my skirt? Or did you?

Rin:
[unconvincingly] No, not even a little bit!

Asa:
[pretending to be disappointed] No? Aw, too bad.

[Primula is clinging to Rin]

Rin:
This isn't what you think.

Itsuki:
Yeah it is cradle-robber.

Rin:
You better shut up. You got about one minute before I sock you.

Itsuki:
[laughing] I can't wait to see you in school tomorrow. Bye Rin.

Rin:
Primula, have you learned anything about the human world yet?

Primula:
I did.

Rin:
What?

Primula:
Cradle-robber.

Rin:
What!

Primula:
Rin is a cradle-robber.

Rin:
NO!

Sia:
Dad, why are you such a psychotic freak?

Eustoma:
Sia, where am I supposed to get a chicken?

Sia:
Go catch one.

[Rin and Nerine appear to be having an intimate moment]

Mayumi:
Hey, you guys kissing over there? With tongue?

Sia:
Hey, no kissing.

[After Nerine has blown up the gym]

Forbesii:
Be glad the damage was minor. It looks like Nerine is finally learning to control her power.

Nadeshiko:
That's your idea of minor damage?

Forbesii:
Oh, absolutely. If Nerine had used her full power she could have blown this entire school to kingdom come. Twice.

Itsuki:
We heard you tried to do dirty things to Nerine and she got mad and used her magic to blow you to smithereens, so we were worried.

Rin:
If you keep making up weird rumors like that, you might just end up suffering the same fate as the gym.

[Sia and Mayumi urgently run over to Nerine upon receiving their final exam results]

Sia:
Rina, we need a favor.

Mayumi:
Please blow up the school.

Nerine:
[confused] Uh?

Mayumi:
Oh, why wasn't I born a full fledged demon instead of a half blood?

Sia:
C'mon Rina, please, just blow this joint up.

Rin:
Let me guess, you guys failed didn't you?

Sia & Mayumi:
...

Nerine:
Um, why are you asking me to blow up the school for such a silly reason?

Sia:
Because you almost did it yesterday.

Nerine:
Oh right, but I was only trying to help Rin.

Rin:
So you would do it if I asked you to?

Nerine:
Of course.

Mayumi:
Do it Rin! C'mon, wish it! Wish for the school to blow up!

Rin:
[thinks for a moment] No.

[Rin had been dreaming about his and Kaede's tormented past]

Kaede:
Rin, um, what were you dreaming about when I woke you?

Rin:
Excuse me? That's an interesting question. Why?

Kaede:
Don't you remember, silly? You called out my name. C'mon, tell me, what was it about.

Rin:
Well I, I just don't know if I remember. [sees Kaede looking dejected] Oh wait, I remember now. You were almost abducted by aliens that mutilated cows. They had big, scary, brown eyes that could see right through you.

Kaede:
You just made that whole entire thing up didn't you?

Rin:
Maybe.

[After fighting off some groupies]

Nerine:
We'll punish anybody who causes trouble for Rin, now leave him alone!

Sia:
You're lucky! Next time it'll be a bench!

Nadeshiko:
Alright, I'm putting all this on your next exam, and since I'm telling you exactly what's going to be on it you shouldn't get it wrong, unless you're an idiot!

Sia:
[whispering] Great. Rin, what am I going to do? I'm gonna get it wrong anyway, I know it.

Rin:
[also whispering] It's okay, we're in the same boat. Don't worry.

Nadeshiko:
Tsucchi, that's not something you should be proud of.

[Rin is trying to follow along with a cooking show]

Rin:
Ugh, I don't get it. Why doesn't mine look like that?

Primula:
Because you suck Rin.

Asa:
[dejected over her nickname] The Shocking Shigure.

Sia:
[upset over the Okra Nattō] Nattō is so hateful. Why?

Nerine:
[disgusted over the Octopus Dumplings] Octopus.

[Written on a note to Rin]

Asa:
Just nuke it! Don't burn it!

Itsuki:
Rin, Rin, Rin, so much to learn. Okay, young girls want only one thing, and that is to feel more like grown ups.

Rin:
And what does that mean?

Itsuki:
It means... lingerie! Yes, buy her lingerie and you get to pick out exactly what you want her to wear!

Rin:
Somehow I don't think that's the answer, but thanks.

Itsuki:
So what you're saying is you're living with a hot little sister who isn't actually related to you so if you look it's okay. Nice!

Rin:
Your ability to turn an innocent situation into something obscene amazes me.

[While it's raining, Rin is able to see through Primula's shirt]

Rin:
You don't have a bra on under your shirt?

Primula:
[innocently] What's a bra?

[Holding up sexy lingerie in front of Rin]

Asa:
Does this make you want me? Tell the truth.

[Rin and Asa are walking home from school together]

Asa:
Well, what do you wanna be? My obnoxious kid brother? A friend of savory ties? An old childhood playmate? It's up to you, take your pick.

Rin:
None of those are sexy.

Asa:
So you wanna feel sexy, do you? [she wraps her arm around his] There, is that better?

Rin:
Oh c'mon, now your just patronizing me.

Asa:
Okay, well give me a second to change.

Rin:
You'll be okay with your sprained ankle?

Asa:
You can give me a hand if it'll make you feel better.

Rin:
Just hurry and change your clothes, Asa. Jeez.

Asa:
Lame. Whatever. You're no fun.

Primula:
[about Rin and Asa] It's bad for a young man and lady to be alone together.

Kaede:
[quick gulp] Rimu, where did you hear that?

Primula:
TV. The daytime drama programs.

Kaede:
You shouldn't watch those kind of shows.

Asa:
That's okay, 'cause I have absolutely no intention of competing with Kaede and your little household harem.

Rin:
Who's the jerk now?

Kareha:
You turned him down, huh?

Asa:
Yeah, I don't think I'm going to be ready for a serious relationship for quite a while.

Kareha:
Is that it or is it possible you're already in love with someone else?

Asa:
No, it's not like that. I just like my life the way it is now and I'm not ready to change it. But, that doesn't mean there isn't someone special out there who could change my mind.

Primula:
I can't sleep.

Rin:
Try counting sheep.

Primula:
Okay. One sheep, two sheep... Rin, what are the sheep doing?

Rin:
Strolling around and jumping fences.

Primula:
Are they for sale?

Rin:
Huh? Why did you ask that?

Primula:
I want to eat them.

Sia:
[reading from magazine] Panties and panties alone determine how lucky you'll be in love. This article's all about lucky panties. [begins going through her panties] But I wonder what kind of panties are the luckiest ones to wear? These ones (yellow pair) might be too flashy. But these (white pair) are too plain and they just don't look that lucky. Underskirts, they're never sexy. And bloomers? Well, not really panties are they?

Sia:
Wow, a romantic evening with Rin. It's like a sign from above, like God himself is telling me I should go on a date with him.

Eustoma:
Sweetheart, I'm pretty sure I tell you that everyday.

Kareha:
You two are ordering the lovey-dovey tropical juice for two? And you're going to share it? I guess you really are on a date! It's only right that I warn you guys that most couples who order that drink end up smooching like crazy afterward!

Rin:
By any chance are you hungry at all?

Sia:
How did you know? There's a restaurant here that's gotten some really great reviews.

[At the restaurant]

Restaurant Employee:
The line starts over here.

Rin:
Wow, it's long.

Sia:
Hey, don't you worry. I know another delicious place that's a few blocks away.

[At the next restaurant]

Rin:
It's closed.

Sia:
Uh, maybe this wasn't it. But I know another one that's even better.

[At the next restaurant]

Rin:
Out of business.

Sia:
[to herself] Well, so much for my plan, my back-up plan, and even my back-up back-up plan.

Rin:
The A/C broke down.

Kaede:
And the repair shop's closed today.

Sia:
Don't worry Rin, leave it to me. Hit it like this from a 45 degree angle. Yah! Um, the A/C is smoking.

Primula:
Hit it from a 60 degree angle.

Rin:
NO!

[Mayumi emerges from the changing room in her swimsuit and the crowd falls silent]

Mayumi:
Why'd you creeps suddenly have to be so let down when I walked out here?

[Itsuki is picking up girls on the beach and spots a woman lying face down on her towel]

Itsuki:
Next target acquired. [walks over to her] Hiya! [She raises her head. He realizes it's his teacher and tries to run away.] My mistake, sorry about this.

Nadeshiko:
[half asleep] For some reason, he seems kinda familiar.

[after losing her top, Asa jumps onto Rin's back to cover herself]

Asa:
What's wrong? I get the feeling I might be embarrassing you a little.

Rin:
Look, the problem isn't whether or not you're embarrassing.

Asa:
You know you like it.

Rin:
Will you stop teasing me? Knowing you, you're probably having some fun at my expense.

Asa:
I wanted to make the best of it. And you? You having fun?

[Asa presses her bare breasts against Rin's back]

Rin:
Damn it, Asa! Come on. Let's get you onto the shore.

Rin:
Seriously, you almost gave me a heart attack.

Asa:
Thanks for your help

Rin:
It's been so crazy, like I don't think I could handle another pair of breasts today.

Sia:
Oh, handling breasts? Is that why you snuck off here without us. [Rin turns and sees Sia and Nerine standing there] Isn't that what you said? I took my eyes off you a second and now... I'd like to know exactly what you've been doing since you ran away.

Sia:
There's no one but us. It's kinda like we're the Adam and Eve of this world.

Itsuki:
Oh hey, check it out. It looks like those two are about to start making out.

Mayumi:
I didn't think Sia was so far in the lead against the other girls. Wow, this is a big scoop!

Kareha:
Oh-la-la!

[Rin and Sia notice everyone standing nearby]

Rin:
Uh, Kaede? Nerine? Itsuki? How? Mayumi? Where has everybody been hiding all this time?

Mayumi:
What do you mean? That's what we've been wanting to ask you!

Nerine:
You two just vanished all of the sudden and we couldn't figure out where you'd gone. We kept waiting for you to come back but you never did.

Eustoma:
Ma-bo, you better watch out, I'm going to catch you!

Forbesii:
Not in a million years.

Eustoma:
I'll never give up!

Forbesii:
I'm beginning to suspect that our daughters aren't very impressed with us.

Eustoma:
[distraught] Sia! That's not true, is it?

Eustoma:
[fighting tears] I guess my little girl is all grown up now. It seems like she was in diapers just the other day. But now she's a woman, and she's going to marry Rin Tsuchimi!

Mayumi:
Finally! You two can run but you can't hide from me. [rushes over to the pair to keep them from escaping] Unbelievable!

Rin:
What do you mean?

Sia:
Mayumi, what's wrong?

Mayumi:
"What's wrong?" Don't play dumb with me. How could you guys keep a huge scoop from me like that? It's so mean. You're going to make it right mister. Since you are the talk of the town right now it's only fitting that you grant your pal Mayumi an exclusive interview. [pretends to hold up a microphone] Mr. Tsuchimi, tell us, what was on your mind when you made your monumental decision? Was it hard? Are you happy? Are you listening?

Itsuki:
Hey, like I said before buddy, don't worry. I'll take care of Kaede and Nerine for you. I'm strong enough to handle both those lovely ladies.

Rin:
Wait, what are you guys talking about?

Itsuki:
Oh come on, everyone knows by now. The man who could become a god or a demon has chosen... to be a god.

Mayumi:
Hey, you guys are getting married, right?

Rin:
[surprised] Eh?

Sia:
[also surprised] What? We are?

[While Asa is on the phone with Rin]

Ama:
Oh, is that Rin on the phone? It is? Hi Rin! Congratulations! I heard the good news.

Asa:
Mother!

Rin:
Ama?

Asa:
Well, talk to you later Rin, by now.

[Asa hangs up the phone]

Rin:
Hey, wait a minute, Asa. Hello. Hello? Man, does everybody in town think we're getting married?

Eustoma:
Sia, look! Daddy found you the perfect wedding dress! Wear this and the most beautiful bride in all three worlds will be my little girl!

[Sia is clearly pissed. Scene cuts to an intermediary with violent sounds in the background.]

Intermediary:
[written] Kids at home, please wait a moment. We apologize for the regular trouble we cause.

[Cuts back to scene. Eustoma is now buried under a pile of chairs.]

Eustoma:
We should talk.

Sia:
Talk, that just might work.

[Having accidentally fallen on top of him, Mayumi flashed her panties to Rin. Thinking they'd be even if she saw his underwear, she then tries to forcefully remove his pants.]

Rin:
Are you guys going to help or are you just going to watch?

[Mayumi looks up and sees Sia, Nerine, Kaede and Primula standing there]

Sia:
Um, hey, what are you two doing exactly?

Mayumi:
[stammering] Uh, well, we were, um... we're playing doctor, that's all.

Mayumi:
Excuse me for not having big boobs. Sure being flat chested definitely puts me in the minority, but it also makes me unique. Personally I think you should feel lucky to know such a rare specimen.

[Kareha has mistakenly believed that Mayumi is in love with Rin]

Mayumi:
Hey, I don't love that dumb jerk.

Kareha:
Alright, so you're not quite ready to profess your love out loud yet. However I'm sure you've got some passionate emotions hidden in that teeny bosom.

Mayumi:
Was that "teeny bosom" crack really necessary?

Mayumi:
This is bad. This is bad. This is so seriously bad. What am I going to do? Wait, what are they looking at? They're all looking at me. Oh no, do they notice I'm not wearing any panties?

Nadeshiko:
[finds Mayumi's wallet on the ground] That airhead, she's going to be in trouble without her little purse.

[Rin shows up with Sia, Nerine, Kaede and Primula]

Rin:
Miss Na, is something wrong?

Nadeshiko:
Well, looks like Mayumi lost her wallet.

Rin:
Mayumi? Uh, I guess it must have happened when we...

[Quick flashback to the earlier accident]

Nadeshiko:
When you what?

Rin:
It's, uh, nothing. Here I'll take it to her.

[Nadeshiko gives Rin the wallet]

Nadeshiko:
So what happened between you and Mayumi?

Rin:
Oh, nothing. I promise.

Primula:
[innocently] Rin and Mayumi were playing doctor.

Rin:
QUIET PRIMULA!

Nadeshiko:
[outraged] Doctor!? Tsuchimi!

Sia:
I found a rhinoceros beetle!

Rin:
Wow, at the end of summer too.

Nerine:
Aren't you afraid of it?

Sia:
No, they're cool. The larva might look gross but they're really nutritious.

Rin & Nerine:
Nutritious?

Rin:
Don't tell me you eat those things.

Sia:
Yeah, why not?

Asa:
Kaede's number 1 in the kitchen, nobody else can come close.

Rin:
That's quite a complement considering you trained her.

Asa:
At the rate she's progressing, she'll be ready to become your wife in no time Rin.

Rin:
Eh, my wife? Asa, please. Why would you say that?

Asa:
If not Kaede, then Sia perhaps? You have to admit things got pretty exciting this summer.

Rin:
But, that was a... It wasn't like that.

Asa:
Okey-doke, I believe you. If Sia's not your choice it must be Nerine. Nerine's no stranger to the kitchen either. She has the cuts and blisters to prove it. She's more determined than ever to impress you with her culinary skills.

Rin:
You're jumping to conclusions that aren't true.

Asa:
If I'm wrong about those three, then who? Maybe you favor Primula?

Rin:
You can't believe that. Please tell me you're kidding.

Asa:
Uh-huh. Of course.

Kareha:
Aha, did I catch you two on a secret rendezvous?

Asa:
No, we just came back from the riverbed.

Kareha:
The riverbed? Oh, how perfect. [starts fantasizing]

Asa:
Kareha, get a grip!

Rin:
I don't think a thing you or I could say will make a difference, she's made up her mind.

Itsuki:
Relax Rin, nothing to be embarrassed about. You're a young man, she's a voluptuous woman, certain urges creep up. Why, it's nothing unusual.

Rin & Asa:
Shut up.

[Asa and Kaede are at cooking club, but Kaede is spacing out]

Asa:
Kaede, what are you doing? [no response] Space cadet, your pot is boiling!

Forbesii:
[on how to cure Primula] By allowing her emotions to show, she was supposed to be able to control her magic. Unfortunately it appears to have served to have the opposite effect on her. Thus resetting Primula's emotions before they grow any stronger, that's the only way. Primula will forget what it is to feel, and she will likely never recall it again.

[During lunch break]

Asa:
What's going on here? You two are sitting way too far apart. [to Rin] Now you listen up mister, you better not have gone and done something to upset Kaede again.

Kaede:
No, Rin hasn't done anything...

Asa:
Don't you lie for him. You don't have to protect him. Come on jerk face, time to fess up.

Rin:
Excuse me, I'm just not in the mood. [leaves]

Asa:
[to Kaede] It's about Rimu, isn't it? Tell me what's wrong.

Asa:
[about Primula] I know why she smiled so pretty. She smiled so pretty because of you (Rin), because she met you.

[Sia, Nerine and Kaede have just voiced their opinion against the idea of Rin going to see Primula]

Asa:
And you call yourself potential girlfriends for Rin? You'd have to be blind not to notice how much Rin's been suffering, the way he's been agonizing and hurting over this, because he wanted to protect someone precious to him and couldn't, thinking there was nothing he could do. He's completely and totally destroyed. You don't get it. Don't you see that he's not himself? He's not himself at all.

Researcher:
But sire, Primula is simply an independent life form, she has neither siblings nor parents nor any emotional attachments. There's no one to mourn her loss...

Eustoma:
You don't know what you're talking about. That's not true now. Is it, Primula?

Lycoris:
[singing] Though we may be far apart... our paths... will cross... again some shining day. We're beneath the same blue sky... and the wind carries our love...

Lycoris:
I want you to use my life to save her (Nerine). If you give her my remaining life energy then she'll have enough strength to recover.

Lycoris:
I know what will happen, but all that matters to me is saving the life of someone I care about.

Forbesii:
So you actually came? I'm not surprised.

Rin:
We're all here to see Primula.

Forbesii:
And what if we say no?

Eustoma:
You wouldn't dare force you're way past the King of the Gods and the King of the Demons, would you? Well?

Sia:
Don't do this father.

Nerine:
Rin's not your enemy, he just wants to see Primula.

Kaede:
And with all due respect your majesties, you have to let Rin see Rimu.

Eustoma:
The last time we tried something like this, the lab was blown to bits. If that happens again they'll be mopping what's left of us off the walls.

Sia:
That's gross dad, don't joke around like that.

Forbesii:
For once, your father's not joking Sia. This is a very dangerous situation and that's exactly why we did not want you to come.

Primula:
[crying] Good-bye, big sis. I love you.

Researcher:
[attempting to explain the situation] ...perhaps in undergoing that change, her magic grew out of control. Consider it a temporary glitch.

Eustoma:
"A temporary glitch?" That's an interesting way to put it. She could blown us to pieces, correct?

Researcher:
Yes. In fact I'm amazed we're still here, the odds of surviving wild magic are less than one percent.

Forbesii:
Maybe miracles do exist.

[Sia has returned home from the supermarket, where she saw Rin but did not approach him after seeing he was with Asa]

Kikyou:
Unbelievable!

Sia:
[surprised] Huh? What's wrong?

Kikyou:
As if you don't know. You walked right by him at the store without even saying hello. I can't believe how weak you've become. Makes me sick.

Kikyou:
You lost him. Don't waste my time if your not willing to fight for what you want. You think Nerine or any of those tramps are concerned about your feelings? Love is ugly.

Sia:
Ugly? What are you saying?

Kikyou:
It isn't a right, Sia. To claim love you have to get your hands bloody. You must claw your way to his heart and beat down any competition. And if not, misery's all you'll ever have to curl up next to.

Sia:
No, you're wrong. Love requires honesty, love is patient and either he's meant for me or he isn't.

Kikyou:
In case you've forgotten, I am you! I know how you really feel!

Kikyou:
Can't say I didn't try. I'm done reasoning with you, Sia. You had plenty of chances to make Rin ours and you blew them all. I think it's time I took control. If you won't claim him, then I will.

[Rin has gone missing]

Kareha:
I don't mean to sound morbid, but you don't think he's been in an accident, do you?

Asa:
Or maybe on his way to my house this morning he got kidnapped.

Kaede:
Kidnapped? [rushes away in a panic]

[After Kikyou's disastrous date with Rin]

Sia:
[in tears] I can't believe you. You're terrible. Why, why did you do that?

Kikyou:
Because something had to be done since you were taking forever to make a move. I did you a favor and just made it for you.

Sia:
I never asked you to. You shouldn't have done that.

Kikyou:
Sorry, I didn't know you were ok with the way things were going. Are you telling me you preferred it that way? Not being able to tell Rin how you feel?

Sia:
At least I was happier then. I would have been fine keeping things the same if I knew how today was going to turn out. But now, how am I supposed to face Rin after all this?

Kikyou:
There's something wrong with Rin, you threw yourself at him and he wouldn't even kiss you. [pauses] You know, I totally thought things would go so well for you today, Sia. I kept telling myself "Sia deserves this, she deserves to fall in love, she deserves happiness." Guess I was wrong.

Sia:
Happiness?

Kikyou:
Of course. I mean, you really are in love with Rin, aren't you? So then if you told him that, maybe it would lead to him loving you.

Kikyou:
I'll always love you, Sia.

Rin:
Well alright, thanks to Kaede smoothing things over, Miss Na doesn't want to kill us now.

Sia:
[flashback, to Kikyou] You don't have to disappear completely, you're a special part of me. I don't want to lose you, so let's stay together. You'll always be with me, we'll be sisters forever, okay? [present, to Rin] And since that day, there have been two versions of me. One is the normal me who's standing in front of you now. And the other, you met yesterday. I guess you could say there are two very different people living inside of me. I experience so many different emotions, like everybody else, whether I'm laughing, crying, or falling in love. You're still seeing the normal Sia. But sometimes the other me comes out causing those same emotions to be much more intense.

Rin:
I see, a new kind of cookie, huh?

Asa:
Yep, it's called a tri-colored cookie. When its finished I'll let you have the privilege of being the first one to taste it.

Rin:
Hold on, doesn't that make me some kind of guinea pig?

Asa:
Well if that's how your going to be, Rin, I'm not going to give you any.

Itsuki:
We all know Rin's not qualified to make these decisions. Considering the gravity of the situation, it is up to me to choose the ultimate date location. [pulls out several photographic slides and inserts them into a projector] Behold, Cupid Land. [various images of the theme park appear on the projector screen] The seats on every ride are made for couples. It's made of lovers, by lovers and for lovers who are looking to share their love. No better place on earth to confess your feelings.

[Itsuki, Mayumi, Sia and Nerine are spying on Rin and Asa's date]

Itsuki:
He just missed the perfect opportunity to grab her hand.

Mayumi:
I have a horrible feeling this date is going to be a nightmare.

Asa:
Everyone here has their own selfish reasons to try and get you to do things Rin, but in the end all that matters is that you do what you truly want to do. Be honest with me, were you forced to go on this date?

Rin:
Of course not Asa, I wanted to take you out.

Kaede:
[flashback] Tell me, why do you think my mother had to die, but you still get to live? I don't think that's fair. I wish you were dead. I mean it. Just die!

Kareha:
You guys should totally do it. Get the lovey-dovey tropical juice special. Drinking it together would be almost like... kissing.

Rin:
No thanks.

Asa:
I think I'll just have a milkshake.

Kareha:
[disappointed] You two are no fun at all. Fine, I'll go get your order. [leaves]

Rin:
Is it really a good idea to come here while Kareha's working? I know you're friends but you don't think she'll spread rumors about us at school, right?

Asa:
Well it wouldn't bother me. You?

[Phone is ringing]

Kaede:
[answering phone] Hi there, is that you Rin?

Rin:
It's me. Asa's mom invited me to stay here and have dinner with them tonight so I don't really need you to make anything for me. [to Ama] If I ate all that, I'll explode.

Ama:
A boy your age should be able to eat twice this much. I expect you to clean your plate.

Asa:
She'll make you do it too.

Ama:
Tell me young man, do you love my daughter? Well?

Rin:
That's a good question, I don't really have an answer yet.

Ama:
Come on, you're a boy, she's a girl, how hard can it be?

[Ama pinches Rin on the arm]

Rin:
Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ama:
So, got an answer?

[Asa has woken up in the hospital. Rin is sitting next to her, holding her hand.]

Rin:
Are you feeling better?

Asa:
Well, my hand's certainly feeling better.

Asa:
Besides, if I stay in the hospital any longer I have a feeling someone will use it as an excuse to skip school.

[Kaede, while naked, has jumped into bed with a sleeping Rin, who immediately awakens]

Kaede:
Rin.

Rin:
Hey, Kaede, what the heck do you think you're doing?

Kaede:
Please Rin, please don't go anywhere. Please don't leave me.

Rin:
What do you mean?

Kaede:
I just want to take care of you, that's all I want. Please don't leave Rin, please just stay here with me in this house forever. Don't you see, I will give you anything.

[Kaede goes to kiss Rin]

Rin:
Just stop it!

[Rin gets out of the bed and heads for the door]

Kaede:
Don't go! No, stay! I take it back, I take it all back! It was crazy! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it that way, just come back! Please Rin... [Rin leaves] No... what did I do? Rin...

Kaede:
[crying] Where did I mess up? When did all this start falling apart? What did I do, what did I do wrong? Maybe Rin never forgave me after all. Maybe he's hated me all this time. After all those horrible things I did, I really can't blame him, can I? What am I going to do if he goes away? How can I keep living in this house without him? I wanted to show him how sorry I am. That's it, that's all I want, I just wanted to take care of him to make up for the past.

Primula:
Are you sure? Was it all for Rin, just for him?

Kaede:
No, you're right, it was for me. I just wanted to be with him. That's what I really wanted.

Primula:
Tell him. Why don't you tell him that? Tell him that you want to be with him.

Kaede:
I have no right to tell him that, not after what I've done.

Primula:
Why not?

Kaede:
Because he'll never love me back. I have no right to tell Rin how I feel because I don't deserve to be loved by him.

Primula:
So that's it? You'll let him go? [pauses] What about me? I want him to stay too.

Kaede:
He'll be back.

Rin:
I think it's time for me to leave this house.

Rin:
Staying with her all these years made her think there was something between us when there wasn't. It's like she's wasted her entire life on me.

Kaede:
I wasn't good enough to make him love me.

Asa:
Kaede...

Kaede:
It's not that surprising. Some of the awful things I've done shouldn't be forgiven. Nonetheless, I took care of his every need. He was all I cared about. Everything I did was for Rin. It was the one thing I could do to try to make up for what I've done. But then, after awhile, I realized that what I really wanted was for him to fall in love with me. I wasn't honest with myself. Everything I did was because I wanted to be with Rin. I haven't been fair to him. The truth is, I took care of him out of love, not debt. Despite what we've been through, I think I will always love him. I wasn't being honest. I was afraid of the truth because I knew he wouldn't love me the same way back.

Asa:
But he knew, he knew that you cared.

Kaede:
I could never forgive myself for what I did. Never. It makes sense though. I can't blame Rin for choosing someone like you over someone like me.

Asa:
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Kaede.

Kaede:
You will make him happy, won't you? Because, Rin deserves it.

Asa:
I certainly plan to, but so far he's the one that's been making me happy.

Kaede:
I can see it in your eyes, you really have fallen for him, haven't you Asa?

Asa:
He caught me off guard.

Kaede:
Good for you. I hate to think about the suffering he went through because of me. But if you make him happy, I think in some way it will sort of make up for it.

Kaede:
Asa, I need you to let me make one selfish request. I want to see him. If I'm able to see him, I can keep on loving him. I know he's not mine. He's never been mine but I need to keep loving him.

Asa:
Kaede...

Kaede:
I'm so sorry, Asa. I know it's selfish, I just... I know how Rin feels, and Asa, I know that you love him. But I still, I still...

Asa:
Stop that. If anybody's selfish it's me. I should have seen it from the beginning, you've been in love with Rin for as long as I've known you. I'm sorry. Forgive me.

Kaede:
Asa and I got caught in the rain. I asked her if she would take good care of you. I needed to make sure, since I'm not going to be able to do it anymore.

Rin:
Kaede. Just listen, I think I'm falling in love with...

Kaede:
Don't say another word. Please Rin, I can't hear it from you. I know how you feel. I don't need to hear it, not from you.

Rin:
Now hold on, that isn't fair. You need to hear this, right now from me and no one else.

Rin:
Even though I don't love you romantically, I will always love you Kaede.

Kaede:
What happened? You're all messy.

Primula:
Yeah, I made dinner.

Asa:
So do you promise that you'll try to protect me Rin, just like she has, the person I admire more than anyone else in this world?

Rin:
I promise, I'll protect you.

Mayumi:
It's been a week since your big, dramatic confession, huh.

Rin:
Hey, what makes you think it was so big and dramatic? You weren't even there.

Mayumi:
I know, that's whats so frustrating. Oh man, how could you let a fabulous photographer such as myself miss an important moment like this?

Itsuki:
You had four girls vying for your attention, but you could only fall in love with one of them. No one can fault you for that, man. I think you made a smart move, your heart spoke to you and you listened. It said "choose Asa, she's your true love." I'm proud of you, man.

Sia:
Just you wait and see. I'm going to work a whole lot harder, okay, so I can become just as attractive as Nerine and Asa.

Rin:
Okay.

Kikyou:
So you better get ready. I'm going to become the most fantastic woman you've ever met and steal your heart.

Forbesii:
No no, I'm not giving up yet Nerine. Rin may have chosen a girlfriend, but he has yet to choose a bride, so the competition's just getting started.

Eustoma:
Party time! Let's drink!

Sia:
Shut up! [hits Eustoma with a chair]

[Nerine has shown up at Rin's apartment wearing a maid outfit]

Rin:
Nerine, why are you dressed like that?

Nerine:
Well, my father told me to.

Itsuki:
Who better to help clean an apartment than a maid? Nice thinking Ma-bo.

Kareha:
You're the only one who can save her life, don't give up on her.

Rin:
Why does everyone think that? Why me? I don't know what I can do to help her, she won't listen to me.

Kareha:
Just think for awhile, there must be something only you can do.

Rin:
If there is, I don't know about it.

Asa:
When I start to get scared, there's this dream I remember.

Rin:
What dream?

Asa:
A dream I had about the two of us when we're both very old. In the dream you had taken me back to that overlook, that place where you first told me you loved me. And in the dream, you told me again and it still felt like the first time. We held each other, were so thankful we had a life together and so glad we had more to look forward to with each other. That's why I'm not going to die.

Ama:
Am I worried? Any mother would be scared to death right now, Rin. She's frightened and in so much pain. Of course I'm worried about her.

Rin:
Ama.

Ama:
If I could take her place, I would in a heart beat. If doing it would make her better, believe me, I'd do it and not care for one second about myself. I'd gladly give Asa my life. I've always tried to be there for her, like any mother would. But I'm not the one who can help her. I'm sorry, but Rin, Asa doesn't need help from me. The person she needs is you.

Rin:
What?

Ama:
You're the only one that can save her.

Rin:
I tried, but Asa won't listen.

Ama:
Asa's stubborn, but please don't give up. She'll come around, just keep trying. The two of you share a special bond of love, that's why she'll listen.

Rin:
You all keep saying that. It's not true, I can't do any more for her than you can.

Ama:
You're wrong about that. I think part of you knows that even now, Asa is more important to you than anyone else in the world and you'll find a way to save her because you have to.

Rin:
If I can, I will.

Ama:
Rin, save Asa. I know you can. I love her so much, bring her back.

Rin:
I don't care if I can become a god or a demon. I don't care about anything. If I can only just save her, thats all I need.

[Rin has found Asa at the overlook after she ran away from the hospital]

Asa:
Rin, how'd you know I'd be here?

Rin:
Oh, just call it a hunch.

Asa:
I see. I really like that you know me as well as you do.

Rin:
I love you with all my heart Asa. I always will, even if it costs me my life.

[Rin awakens to see Asa has used her magic to save his life. This, in turn, has saved her own life.]

Rin:
Nice to see you again.

Asa:
You dummy.

[Everyone is talking about how Kaede had coffee ready for Rin that morning]

Asa:
Pretty sneaky move you made there, Kaede.

Kaede:
No, you got it all wrong, I just happened to wake up early.

Primula:
No you didn't Kaede, you set your alarm.

Kaede:
RIMU!

Itsuki:
That being said, what do you say Kaede, do you want to go on a date with me?

Rin:
Here we go.

Kaede:
Oh, um thank you Itsuki, but I still have feelings for Rin. I'm sorry.

Itsuki:
But he's got a girlfriend.

Kaede:
Yeah, that's true, but you see, Asa told me it's okay if I still love him, and I do.

Itsuki:
Good for you and Rin. And what about you Nerine? Wanna go out?

Nerine:
I'm sorry, I'm sure you're a nice guy and would show me a fine time, but I've got a thing for Rin too.

Itsuki:
How about you Sia?

Sia:
Thanks, but the world of the Gods is a polygamist society, so I can still have Rin.

Itsuki:
Crap.

Tsubomi:
[watching Rin and Asa awkwardly flirt] I love a happy ending.

Rin:
[about Asa] She never fails to slap my back violently as a greeting, and she teases me mercilessly.

Rin:
[narrating] And now, the sun's setting. The children making promises in their dreams. After a nice bath and a good night's sleep, another day starts anew. Well yes, with all these charismatic girls, and guys full of character around me, it can be said that by not being bored is one's happiness. I just want to be together with everyone, no matter what, and continue living life as it is. That's what I want. I, Tsuchimi Rin, and my dear friends picture this perfect human world, and flip open the Shuffle cards. Whatever will happen next? What will tomorrow bring? It is really exciting. I'm looking forward to it.

Kaede:
[narrating] I am saved by Rin-kun's gentleness. It has been the same for a long time and will definitely be the same in the future. Everyone likes him because he is gentle. Therefore I can't have all of his gentleness for myself. Even thought that's the case, I'm alright with it. As long as I get to see Rin-kun's smile, as long as I can hear Rin-kun's thanks, I'll be able to cheer up and feel very happy. Being with Rin-kun is more than enough. Please always let me be with Rin-kun. Because, my purpose in life is to care for Rin-kun.

Asa:
[narrating]When summer ended, Rimu-chan's body suddenly became very weak. She was weakened due to a high fever, and no one knew the reason behind it. When I heard about it, I was thinking "No way!" In my heart, there is a bad feeling which cannot disappear. Why must Rimu-chan suffer from such a condition as well? I know that there's no way to heal it. Rin-chan made a decision. A very painful decision. Sending Rimu-chan back to the demon world.

Nerine:
[narrating] To be able to be with Rin-sama, everyday is a happy day. Time passes very quickly. That time, when Kaede-san collapsed due to flu, Rin-sama was extremely worried and took leave from school to take care of her.

Sia:
[narrating] During the beach trip, we got separated leaving Rin-kun and me alone. We lost our way, and probably couldn't make our way back. Rin-kun kept by my side and looked after the insecure me. Isn't Rin-kun kind? I'm growing to like you more and more! I expected much more, but I guess we both aren't suitable to be lovers. Even then, Dad has a huge misunderstanding! He decided on our marriage!

Primula:
[narrating] Due to the waves, Rin and Sia got washed away. Actually, they had just drifted off to an opposite shore. Just that Rin didn't realize it. A world where there are only two people, it seems to be very real. What did they do?

Asa:
[narrating] All I can do is keep hiding it, keeping this as it is. But, I don't know how many times my naturally weak body can let it happen again. It's become more and more difficult to handle. In the end, I finally fainted. It feels like those happy days were being taken far away.

Nerine:
[narrating] I heard about it from father, in order to save Rimu-chan's life, all of her emotions must be reset. It's too cruel. Rin-sama worked hard to make Rimu-chan smile. Father wishes to hide it from Rin-sama and everyone else. And so, I've always kept it a secret. But, to keep such an important thing a secret, even I...

Nerine:
[narrating] I also wish to save Rimu-chan. But, when I think of the one in a million chances, I cannot be frank to Rin-sama, no matter the situation. Rin-sama felt very depressed after listening to my story. But, the person who supported Rin-sama during this period was Shigure-senpai. Saying that if Rimu-chan is a true family member, then he should go. That was what I couldn't force myself to say. And now, Rin-sama has decided to go to the demon world.

Primula:
[narrating] Lycoris, who was with me in the demon's world research labs, like me, existed as a test subject. But she has always cheered me up with her positive views. To me, she's like an Onee-chan.

Primula:
[narrating] After starting a new life with Kaede, I'm now attending Verbena Academy as a first year student. Even though I can't be in the same class as Rin, I don't feel lonely. I can meet him whenever I wish. Because, we're a family.

Mayumi:
I have no interest in any ordinary fish! If there is a God's fish, then come to me! That is all!

[parody of Haruhi Suzumiya's first lines in The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya]

Kaede:
Rin-kun, where did he go? To be naked with Rin-chan, what are they doing?

Asa:
What... what?

Kaede:
What are the both of them really doing, naked?

Asa:
Don't worry, Rin-chan does not have the guts to do such things!

Kaede:
But what if there was the possibility? In that case, I...

Asa:
Kaede, seriously. You seem to be rather immature usually, but when such things happen, you suddenly have a great imagination.

Kaede:
But. Erm, Rin-kun is still a guy after all.

Asa:
Since you put it that way...

Asa:
I don't think this is what Rin-chan would do.

Sia:
But three people naked together?

Asa:
You have a point.

Sia:
Rin-kun. Let's fire some fireworks together!

Rin:
Right, let's compare whose fireworks will last the longest!

Asa:
Then the winner will have Rin-chan fulfilling any wish they desire!

Rin:
What is this?

Sia:
Yay, Rin-kun, I want a kiss from you!

Nerine:
I'll definitely not lose!

Kaede:
Me neither!

Mayumi:
Maybe this really isn't the King of Devils' place at all, and Midoriba-kun's memory is full of cobwebs?

Itsuki:
I don't want to hear that coming from the girl with such a notoriously bad memory she'd be outscored on exams by a chicken. My memory is always in perfect shape.

Sage:
Now, Forbesii-sama! Please give me a firm, clear, exact, logical, convincing explanation! Why were you! The master of this home! Doing the breakfast preparations! Again! On your own! Disregarding me, your servant! Doing it like it's natural!

[Sage drags Rin into her room to talk with him]

Sage:
Hey, why did all of you come with us!

Cineraria:
It looked amusing!

Mayumi:
It looked like fun!

Itsuki:
I'm envious!

Sage:
Aaaaah... these people are hopeless.

Rin:
That's why I said you should look behind us.

Mayumi:
So, what're you bringing him back to your room for this time?

Sage:
Never mind. Just don't forget that I had no recollection of ever dragging all of you along for this.

Bark:
Namely! I, the person closest to the young master, still have a chance!

Rin:
No, none, not a shred, hopeless.

Bark:
Hahahaha... Ai-sama, our battle has just begun. I, Bark, am fired up, down to the last particle of my soul! I shall show you that my love will prevail!

Mayumi:
Now, the moment you've all been waiting for! It's Tsuchimi-kun Interrogation Time! We're your hosts, your pleasantly happy 'Let's get him together' Mayumi Thyme, and--

Itsuki:
'Rin's secrets are public property,' Itsuki Midoriba. We'll push forward with no need for discretion.

Rin:
Sorry, but you've been cancelled.

Itsuki:
Didn't you get so excited by a strawberry popsicle once that you got it up your nose and couldn't get it out?

Mayumi:
Don't worry. I'm sure you'll survive, even if you die!

Forbesii:
Still, for all the mediating he did for our relationship, I hope he'll be just as happy.

Mayumi:
Forgetting everything and turning defiant right before an exam is the best! Having another drink the morning after a hangover? Don't be a lightweight; drink yourself out! They said some good things in the olden days.

Itsuki:
I've had something I've wanted to say for a while, but... Mayumi, you're a pretty pitiable girl, huh?

Itsuki:
Personally, when I think that this might be my farewell to Kaede-chan, I feel like I might drown in sorrow. I guess no matter what means I utilize...

Rin:
You're going to wind up on the front page of a nationwide paper, so cut it out.

Mayumi:
Well, it's not like there's no chance we'll wind up together again. Let's just hope that the academy comes to a warmhearted decision and puts us four problem-students with Nacchan.

Kaede:
Problem-students?