Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Season 4

Chief O'Brien:
I never thought I'd say this, but right now I'm glad the Dominion's around. Otherwise, we never would have started these upgrades, let alone have them almost finished by now.

Major Kira:
There's something to be said for incentive.

Chief O'Brien:
Uh-huh. I just hope everything works okay.

Major Kira:
You're saying you're not sure?

Chief O'Brien:
The way I see it, there are two possibilities: either everything will be fine, or...

Major Kira:
Or?

Chief O'Brien:
[slightly hesitant] Or we end up blowing the station to pieces. [chuckles]

Major Kira:
Oh. Well, let's hope we don't have to find out.

Elim Garak:
I find this hand-to-hand combat really quite distasteful.

Gul Dukat:
I suppose you prefer the simplicity of an interrogation chamber?

Elim Garak:
You have to admit, it's much more civilized.

Benjamin Sisko:
Arm quantum torpedoes. Drop the cloak and raise shields. We're going in.

Benjamin Sisko:
I finally realized that it wasn't Starfleet that I was trying to get away from. I was trying to escape the pain I felt after my wife's death. I thought I could take the uniform, wrap it around the pain, and toss them both away. But it doesn't work like that. Running may help for a little while, but sooner or later the pain catches up with you, and the only way to get rid of it is to stand your ground and face it.

Julian Bashir:
I'm sure there's more than one Klingon who thinks that slaying a Changeling would be worthy of a song or two.

Odo:
Doctor, if a Klingon were to kill me, I'd expect an entire opera on the subject.

Odo:
Come on, Quark, move it along. You should be in the emergency shelter by now.

Quark:
I'm not going to any emergency shelter! This is my bar and I'm going to defend it.

Odo:
Really? And how do you plan to do that?

Quark:
With this. (holds up a closed box)

Odo:
You're going to hit them with a box?

Quark:
No, this is my disruptor pistol, the one I used to carry back in the old days when I was serving on that Ferengi freighter.

Odo:
I thought you were the ship's cook.

Quark:
That's right, and every member of that crew thought he was a food critic. If the Klingons try to get through these doors, I'll be ready for them.

(He opens the box, which is empty save for a note. Odo takes it out.)

Odo:
(reads aloud) "Dear Quark, I used parts of your disruptor to fix the replicators. Will return them soon. Rom."

Quark:
(grabs the note) I will kill him!

Odo:
With what?

[Kira and Dax come down the stairs dressed as medieval ladies.]

Jadzia Dax:
I can't believe you did that.

Kira Nerys:
He didn't leave me any choice.

Julian Bashir:
Wait, wait, wait. What did she do?

Jadzia Dax:
She knocked out Lancelot.

Kira Nerys:
He kissed me.

Jadzia Dax:
He's supposed to kiss you.

Kira Nerys:
But I was playing a married woman.

Julian Bashir:
Lieutenant Commander Worf, this is Lieutenant Commander Jadzia Dax, and Major Kira Nerys, our first officer.

Worf:
Nice hat.

Kira Nerys:
[pulling the wimple off] I don't usually dress like this. We were in the holosuite...

Worf:
So I gathered. [To Dax] You used to be Curzon Dax.

Jadzia Dax:
That's right. And I don't usually dress like this either.

Worf:
Curzon's name is an honoured one among my people.

Jadzia Dax:
(in Klingon) Yes, but I'm a lot better-looking than he was.

Worf:
I suppose so.

[a group of Klingons invade the tailor's shop]

Elim Garak:
Well, let me guess. You're either lost, or desperately searching for a good tailor.

Drex:
Guess again! (punches Garak)

Julian Bashir:
I can't believe you're not pressing charges.

Elim Garak:
Constable Odo and Captain Sisko expressed a similar concern, but really, Doctor, there was no harm done.

Julian Bashir:
They broke seven of your transverse ribs and fractured your clavicle.

Elim Garak:
Ah, but I got off several cutting remarks, which no doubt did serious damage to their egos.

Julian Bashir:
Garak, this isn't funny.

Elim Garak:
I'm serious, Doctor! Thanks to your ministrations, I'm almost completely healed, but the damage I did to them will last a lifetime.

[Garak takes a drink of root beer]

Quark:
What do you think?

Elim Garak:
It's vile.

Quark:
I know. It's so bubbly and cloying and happy.

Elim Garak:
Just like the Federation.

Quark:
And you know what's really frightening? If you drink enough of it, you begin to like it.

Elim Garak:
It's insidious.

Quark:
Just like the Federation.

[pause]

Elim Garak:
Do you think they can save us?

Quark:
I hope so.

Benjamin Sisko:
We've had a year to prepare this station for a Dominion attack, and we're more than ready.

Gowron:
(laughs) You're like a toothless old grishna cat, trying to frighten us with your roar!

Benjamin Sisko:
I assure you, this old cat may not be as toothless as you think. Right now I've got five thousand photon torpedoes armed and ready to launch. If you don't believe me, feel free to scan the station.

[Martok and Gowron look across the bridge to their sensor officer, who nods.]

Martok:
It's a trick! An illusion created by thoron fields and duranium shadows.

Benjamin Sisko:
It's no illusion.

Gowron:
We shall see. (in Klingon) Today is a good day to die!

Gowron:
Your shields are down, your station boarded, and more Klingon ships are on their way! Surrender while you can!

Benjamin Sisko:
I don't think so. My shields are holding, your boarding parties are contained, and my reinforcements are closer than yours.

Benjamin Sisko:
(referring to the Federation reinforcements) So what do you want me to tell them? To stand down or come in firing?

Gowron:
...It is we who shall stand down.

Martok:
Agh Dogh!

Gowron:
Enough! I do not intend to hand victory to Dominion! But hear this. The Klingon Empire will remember what has happened today. You have sided against us in battle! And THIS we do not forgive or forget!

Benjamin Sisko:
I'm no writer, but if I were, it seems to me I'd wanna poke my head up every once in a while and take a look around—see what's going on. It's life, Jake! You can miss it if you don't open your eyes!

Jake Sisko:
This is the last chance I'm ever going to have to help you. [Jake fades in and out] [Pained] No!

Benjamin Sisko:
Jake, it's over. It's not going to work.

Jake:
It has to.

Benjamin:
Let go, Jake! If not for yourself, then for me. You still have time to make a better life for yourself. Promise me you'll do that. [Pleading] Promise me!

Jake:
Read the dedication.

Benjamin:
"To my father, who's coming home". Thank you, but I— I don't understand.

Jake:
It was me. It was me all along. I've been dragging you through time like an anchor, and now it's time to cut you loose.

Benjamin:
Jake, what are you saying?

Jake:
It won't be long now.

Benjamin:
Jake, you didn't have to do this. Not for me.

Jake:
For you, and for the boy that I was. He needs you, more than you know. Don't you see? We're going to get a second... chance.

Miles O'Brien:
Keiko only spends a few days at a time on the station. I'm the one living in those quarters, and if I want to set up a little workshop in the bedroom—

Julian Bashir:
You set up a workshop in the bedroom?

Miles O'Brien:
Yeah. I don't use it when she's visiting.

Julian Bashir:
No, of course not.

Miles O'Brien:
She says I'm trying to live like a bachelor again, that I'm expressing a subconscious desire to push her out of our quarters.

Julian Bashir:
Now that is ridiculous.

Miles O'Brien:
That's what I said!

Julian Bashir:
I mean, if anything, by spending your free time in the bedroom, a place you intimately associate with Keiko, you are actually expressing...a desire to be closer to her...during her absence. It's quite touching, really.

Miles O'Brien:
Exactly! Exactly! See, you understand. Why can't she see that? Why can't she be more like—

Julian Bashir:
More like?

Miles O'Brien:
[Beat] Uh, a man. Y—you know, more like a man.

Julian Bashir:
So...you wish that Keiko...was a man.

Miles O'Brien:
I wish I was on this trip with someone else, that's what I wish.

Bashir:
What a lovely place. Smells like a garbage dump.

O'Brien:
I'm sorry I couldn't find a nicer place to crash-land. Should we try again?

Kira Nerys:
Tell me something—who's Tora Ziyal? When I reactivated the Ravinok's computer, I downloaded the manifest. There were two civilians on board, in addition to the prisoners and the crew. Your... friend Tora Naprem and a Tora Ziyal, a thirteen year-old girl.

Gul Dukat:
I suppose you wouldn't believe me if I told you she was Naprem's sister?

Kira Nerys:
Ziyal is a Cardassian name.

Jadzia Dax:
Quite an audience.

Lenara Kahn:
Seems a shame to disappoint them. We should probably do something.

Jadzia Dax:
We could get into a screaming match. Start throwing things at each other?

Lenara Kahn:
Not bad. Or I suppose we could throw ourselves at each other—profess our undying love and complete disregard for Trill society?

Jadzia Dax:
Doctor Pren would probably have a heart attack!

Kira Nerys:
What do Klingons dream about?

Worf:
Things that will send cold chills down your spine and wake you in the middle of the night. No, it is better that you do not know. Excuse me. [He leaves]

Kira Nerys:
I can never tell when he's joking.

Lenara Kahn:
Perhaps it is better that we 'do not know'.

Jadzia Dax:
Everyone's trying to... look out for us. Protect us from ourselves. But in the end, all that matters is how we feel... and what we do about it. Because either way, we're the ones who have to live with the consequences.

Lenara Kahn:
That's the tricky part though, isn't it? Living with the consequences. When I'm not with you, when you're not around, it's like part of me is missing. I want to be with you more than anything. But I don't think I can do this.

Jadzia Dax:
Can you really walk away from me, from us? After all this time, we're back together. Don't throw that away.

Lenara Kahn:
I don't want to. Maybe I need more time. Maybe if I go back to Trill for a while—think it over. I could always come back later.

Jadzia Dax:
I wish I could believe that. But ultimately, it comes down to this—if you feel about me the way I feel about you, you won't get on that transport tomorrow. And if you do leave, I think we both know you're never coming back.

Quark:
It's 50-50. Better odds than you get at the dabo table.

Hanok:
Dabo?

Quark:
It's a game. If we get out of this, I'll teach it to you.

Bashir:
You took in a few lungfuls of Fluorine.

Dax:
Remind me to hold my breath next time.

Quark:
All I ask is a tall ship— And a load of contraband to fill her with.

Quark:
All hu-mons look alike.

Rom:
New customers are like razor-tooth gree-worms—they can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back.

[Rom has explained how he'll save their lives with a long string of technobabble]

Quark:
Rom! You're a genius!

Rom:
You think so?

Quark:
How should I know? I have no idea what you're talking about.

General Denning:
What do you know about atom bombs?

Quark:
My people have been watching your world for years. We know all about you—baseball, root beer, darts, atom bombs.

Nog:
The first landing parties will arrive here! (points at a random spot on a map)

Wainwright:
Where?

Nog:
Here, right next to this blue blob!

Wainwright:
You mean your people are going to invade— Cleveland?

[Quark's cousin has tried to kill him earlier]

Quark:
I'm innocent, I tell ya! This is all a misunderstanding! Rom, get me a lawyer!

Rom:
I'll call Cousin Gaila. I'm sure he'll know a good one.

Quark:
[as he's being dragged away] ROM, YOU IDIOT!

Rom:
[grins] See you in a few weeks, brother!

Quark:
You know what I like about Klingon stories? Nothing. Lots of people die and nobody makes a profit.

Elim Garak:
Kiss the girl, get the key. They never taught me that in the Obsidian Order.

Elim Garak:
Interesting. You saved the day by destroying the world.

Julian Bashir:
I'll bet they didn't teach you that in the Obsidian Order.

Elim Garak:
No. No, there were a good many things they didn't teach me. Like the value of a good game of chance. Or how indulging in fantasy keeps the mind creative.

Julian Bashir:
Lunch tomorrow?

Elim Garak:
Of course. But why don't we have it at your place. In Hong Kong. Unless this was your last adventure.

Julian Bashir:
Oh, I think it's safe to say that Julian Bashir, Secret Agent, will return.

[Re:
the decor in the holodeck, circa 1964]

Elim Garak:
Another decorator's nightmare. This era had a distinct lack of taste.

[Bashir has shot Garak, who is lightly bleeding from his neck]

Julian Bashir:
You'll be fine. It's just a flesh wound.

Elim Garak:
That was awfully close. What if you'd killed me?

Julian Bashir:
What makes you think I wasn't trying?

Elim Garak:
[Brightening] Doctor, I believe there's hope for you yet.

Caprice:
Thank you, Mister— Mister—

Julian Bashir:
Bashir. Julian Bashir.

[They kiss]

Elim Garak:
Is that your plan?

Julian Bashir:
Shut up!

Julian Bashir:
Baccarat and geology are my life.

Noah (holographic Sisko):
If you think you are gonna destroy my keyboard, you are wasting your time!

Flacon (holographic O'Brien):
It's working just as you planned! You've done it, doctor."

Noah (holographic Sisko):
"Yes. But somehow, I didn't expect to win."

Elim Garak:
"Interesting, you saved the day by destroying the world."

Julian Bashir:
"I bet they didn't teach you that in the Obsidian Order."

Joseph Sisko:
I'm not sleeping. I was checking my eyelids for holes.

Benjamin Sisko:
I hope you don't take this the wrong way, Constable... but there are times when I wish you'd never found your people.

Odo:
Believe me, Captain, sometimes I feel the same way.

Chief O'Brien:
You probably wouldn't understand this, Quark, but when you care about a place and it's in trouble and you want to do something about it, and you can't, it's very frustrating.

Quark:
I know exactly what you mean! When the Great Monetary Collapse hit Ferenginar, I was hundreds of light-years away serving as a ship's cook on a long-haul freighter. I can't tell you the heartbreak I suffered, knowing that rampant inflation and currency devaluation were burning like wildfires through the lush financial foliage of my home. It still depresses me, even today. I remembered thinking my accounts needed me and there was nothing I could do! I felt so... so helpless. So you see, I do understand.

Chief O'Brien:
Somehow, you telling me that doesn't make me feel the least bit better.

Joseph:
I've got a dermal regenerator under the...(Joseph notices Sisko staring at the blood, and realises what he's wondering about) Benjamin Lafayette Sisko! What the hell has gotten into your head? You actually thought I was one of them, didn't you?

Sisko (desperate, upset):
I don't know. I wasn't sure.

Joseph:
This business has got you so twisted around you can't think straight. You're seeing shape-shifters everywhere. Maybe you ought to think about something for a minute. If I was a smart shape-shifter, a really good one, the first thing I would do would be to grab some poor soul off the street, absorb every ounce of his blood, and let it out on cue whenever someone like you tried to test me. Don't you see? There isn't a test that's been created a smart man can't find his way around. You aren't going to catch shape-shifters using some gadget.

Federation President Jaresh-Inyo:
Earth is in your hands, gentlemen. Do what needs to be done.

Benjamin Sisko:
There comes a time in every man’s life when he must stop thinking and start doing.

Nog:
I'm sorry, Captain, the names of Red Squad members are supposed to be secret.

Benjamin Sisko:
But you know who they are?

Nog:
Hee-hee. It's not easy keeping secrets from a Ferengi, and I feel funny telling anyone else. Besides, if they found out I told you, I'd never get in.

Benjamin Sisko:
Cadet, you are obviously under the mistaken impression that I am asking a favor. [increasingly hostile voice] I want a name and I want it now and that is an order. Understood, Mr. Nog?

Nog:
Yes, sir.

[Sisko interrogating a Cadet]

Cadet Shepherd:
...and our role would go unrecognized, at least for now.

Benjamin Sisko:
Maybe if you had done your job right it would have. But you fouled it up, didn't you? You cadets did some sloppy work—some damn sloppy work.

[Sisko enters Leyton's office pointing a phaser at him]

Admiral Leyton:
Are you planning on using that?

Benjamin Sisko:
Against a fellow officer? I hope not. [Takes off Leyton's combadge] But I will have to ask for your resignation.

Admiral Leyton:
You'll forgive me if I don't leap at the opportunity.

Benjamin Sisko:
I have enough evidence to convict you of treason. We have Lieutenant Arriaga in custody on the Defiant, and he is ready to admit that under your orders, he attached a subspace modulator to the relay satellite on the far side of the wormhole. That's why it was opening and closing at random.

Admiral Leyton:
Why would anyone want to do that?

Benjamin Sisko:
To make it look like a cloaked Dominion fleet was coming through the wormhole. That way, when Earth's power relays were sabotaged, people would think that an invasion was imminent.

Admiral Leyton:
That's a very interesting theory, but it's not going to do you much good. Lieutenant Arriaga isn't going to get to Earth. I've sent the Lakota to intercept the Defiant.

Benjamin Sisko:
You really think one Starfleet starship will fire on another?

Admiral Leyton:
As far as Benteen's crew is concerned, the Defiant isn't a Starfleet ship. They've been told that everyone on the Defiant 's been replaced by Shapeshifters.

Kira Nerys:
I've been meaning to ask you—why don't you wear that belt anymore?

Odo:
I don't know. Didn't seem to serve a purpose. It's not as if I needed it to hold my pants up.

Kira Nerys:
I just thought it looked good on you, that's all.

Odo:
[Brightening considerably] Really?

Kira Nerys:
[Smiles] Really.

[Odo morphs his waist to include a belt on his uniform]

Odo:
Better?

Kira Nerys:
Much.

[Talking to Odo about Kira]

Quark:
You've either got to tell her how you feel, or forget about her and get on with your life.

Miles O'Brien:
I don't know why Captain Sisko insists on me being here. I'm not a senior officer.

Julian Bashir:
Maybe he just wanted to see you in your dress uniform. It does show off your figure.

Tora Ziyal:
When I look at my father, I have a hard time seeing a murderer.

Kira Nerys:
And when I look at him, I have a hard time seeing anything else.

Gul Dukat:
What is this I hear about you and Shakaar?

Kira Nerys:
I don't know what you've heard.

Gul Dukat:
First it was Vedek Bareil, and now it's the head of the Bajoran government. You do like powerful men, don't you?

Kira Nerys:
First of all, Shakaar's an old friend. Second of all, what business is it of yours?

Gul Dukat:
Let's just say it's further incentive for me to regain my former position.

Tora Ziyal:
You don't like my father very much, do you?

Kira Nerys:
No, I don't.

Tora Ziyal:
I understand. He did some very bad things during the Occupation.

Kira Nerys:
Yes, he did.

Tora Ziyal:
It bothers him, you know?

Kira Nerys:
[Disbelieving] Does it?

Tora Ziyal:
Very much. He talks about it sometimes. He'd never admit it to anyone else, but he thinks the Occupation was a mistake.

Kira Nerys:
Somehow, I don't think he'd say that if the Cardassians had won.

Tora Ziyal:
Maybe not, but maybe losing made him a better person.

Kira Nerys:
Well, then, a lot of innocent people died for his education.

Gul Dukat:
You judge me too harshly. Maybe I am seeking to regain my former position, one which I earned through hard work, dedication, and sacrifice, but redemption is not my sole motivation. I care about my people, and I don't intend to allow the Klingons to get away with murdering them. I'm a much more complicated man than you give me credit for.

Kira Nerys:
Well, if that's true, I suppose I prefer simpler men.

Gul Dukat:
Like Shakaar? It amazes me that a woman as intelligent and sophisticated as you could be attracted to such a lumbering, simplistic fieldhand. I mean, what could the two of you possibly talk about?

Kira Nerys:
That lumbering fieldhand is the First Minister of Bajor, and he knows more about how to talk to me than you ever will.

Gul Dukat:
How can you be so sure? After all, you don't know me well enough to make a comparison.

Kira Nerys:
I don't want to know you well enough. And if you want to keep working with me, I suggest you stick to business.

Gul Dukat:
I'm sorry, Major. I didn't mean any harm. I was just making conversation.

Gul Dukat:
Major, is it my imagination, or do you have a hard time accepting compliments?

Kira Nerys:
I have a hard time accepting compliments from you.

Gul Dukat:
Well, I'll try to restrain my enthusiasm, [Leans in and whispers] but I can't make you any promises.

[Dukat has asked Kira to join him in his fight against the Klingons]

Gul Dukat:
You know how to organize a resistance cell, you're an expert at terrorist tactics, you have close ties with Bajoran and Federation officials, and besides all that, it would give you a chance to do what you were meant to do.

Kira Nerys:
No, thanks. I've already got a job.

Gul Dukat:
What do you mean? On that space station? We both know your talents are being wasted there, co-ordinating docking assignments and leading training exercises. On Deep Space Nine, you're nothing but a bureaucrat, an administrator. If you come with me, you can be a soldier again. Think about it, Major—the chance to fight again against a superior foe in a righteous cause, to protect a defeated and broken people from a cruel aggressor. You know as well as I do that if Cardassia falls, Bajor is next. Help me stop the Klingons before you become their next target.

Kira Nerys:
You're really serious about this.

Gul Dukat:
Absolutely! Look, Major, I'm not asking you to like me or to be my friend. I'm asking you to join me, to fight at my side. You know what I'm doing is right, and it's what you want to do as well. I know that our past makes it difficult for you to accept me as an ally. I also know that every fiber of your being is telling you to say, "No, no, no," but somewhere I know there's a "Yes." You need to listen to that "Yes," not for my sake, not for Cardassia's, not even for Bajor's, but for your sake.

Gul Dukat:
Well, Major, it appears that whether you like it or not, our lives have become deeply intertwined.

Kira Nerys:
[Smiles] That really pleases you, doesn't it?

Gul Dukat:
Pleases me? Major, it gives me reason to live.

(Altered) Kurn:
Are you part of my family?

Worf:
[Pauses a moment] I have no family.

Julian Bashir:
What you have there is a sebaceous cyst.

Miles O'Brien:
I know it's a cyst, but it's getting bigger.

Julian Bashir:
There's nothing to worry about. Dermatalogically speaking, you're perfectly healthy.

Miles O'Brien:
Oh, I'm perfectly healthy, except I've got a disgusting cyst on the back of my neck. Now either I paint a nose, eyes, and mouth on it and pretend I've got two heads, or you take it off.

Julian Bashir:
I'll get you some paint.

Miles O'Brien:
Julian! Get it off me!

Julian Bashir:
Alright, alright. But you know what they say: two heads are better than one.

Miles O'Brien:
Julian, I'm waiting!

Unidentified:
211: “Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success—don't hesitate to step on them.”

Rom:
“Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum.”

Odo:
Forgive me, Major, I don't mean to be difficult, but your faith seems to have led you to something of a contradiction.

Kira Nerys:
I don't see it as a contradiction.

Odo:
I don't understand.

Kira Nerys:
That's the thing about faith. If you don't have it, you can't understand it. And if you do, no explanation is necessary.

Kira Nerys:
Who are you?

Akorem Laan:
I am the Emissary.

[O'Brien's quarters are a mess. He begins to straighten up for his wife Keiko, who is returning after a year away]

Julian Bashir:
It is sort of a shame to pack this stuff away.

Miles O'Brien:
Wish we didn't have to.

Julian Bashir:
It's like a sculpture, a monument to your year as a bachelor.

Miles O'Brien:
I suppose it is.

Julian Bashir:
Who are we to dismantle this piece of art?

Miles O'Brien:
I don't know. But if we don't, Keiko will dismantle me.

Benjamin Sisko:
Part of being a captain is knowing when to smile. Make the troops happy! Even when it's the last thing in the world you want to do. Because they are your troops, and you have to take care of them.

Worf:
Life is a great deal more complicated in this red uniform.

Benjamin Sisko:
Wait till you get four pips on that collar. You'll wish you had gone into botany.

[O'Brien is preparing to commit suicide]

Julian Bashir:
Chief?

Miles O'Brien:
Get outta here, Julian.

Julian Bashir:
You don't want to do this, Chief.

Miles O'Brien:
The hell I don't.

Julian Bashir:
Look, I don't claim to know what you're going through, but whatever it is, it's not worth dying for.

Miles O'Brien:
You don't understand at all. I'm not doing this for me. I'm doing it to protect Keiko and Molly and everyone else on this station.

Julian Bashir:
Protect us from what?

Miles O'Brien:
From me. I'm not the man I used to be. I'm dangerous. I nearly hit Molly today. All she wanted was a little attention, and I nearly hit her.

Julian Bashir:
But you didn't. You're a good man, Miles Edward O'Brien, and whatever it is you think you've done wrong, you don't deserve to die.

Mirror O'Brien:
Shields are down to 40 percent. That cruiser has us in weapons range. Do we make a run for it?

Captain Sisko:
We run all right. Right at it.

Mirror O'Brien:
[sarcastic understanding] Ahh... “Pattern Suicide". (reference to earlier confusion over what "Pattern Delta" was)

Mirror Jadzia:
I heard you were back. (slaps Sisko) That's for making love to me under false pretenses! I was suspicious of you from the start.

Captain Sisko:
You hid it well.

[Eddington has joined the Maquis]

Michael Eddington:
I know you. I was like you once, but then I opened my eyes. Open your eyes, Captain. Why is the Federation so obsessed about the Maquis? We've never harmed you. And yet we're constantly arrested and charged with terrorism. Starships chase us through the Badlands, and our supporters are harassed and ridiculed. Why? Because we've left the Federation, and that's the one thing you can't accept. Nobody leaves Paradise. Everyone should want to be in the Federation. Hell, you even want the Cardassians to join. You're only sending them replicators so that one day they can take their rightful place on the Federation Council. You know, in some ways you're worse than the Borg. At least they tell you about their plans for assimilation. You're more insidious—you assimilate people and they don't even know it.

Benjamin Sisko:
You know what, Mr. Eddington? I don't give a damn what you think of the Federation, or the Maquis, or anything else. All I know is that you betrayed your oath, your duty, and me. And if it takes me the rest of my life, I'll see you standing before a court-martial that'll break you and send you to a penal colony where you'll spend the rest of your days growing old and wondering whether a ship full of replicators was really worth it.

Elim Garak:
(re: a Cardassian phaser) I guess I won't be needing this then.

Weyoun:
Captain Benjamin Sisko. Your psychographic profile is required reading for Vorta Field Supervisors. I probably know things about you that you don't know yourself.

Benjamin Sisko:
If you're trying to impress me, you can forget it.

Weyoun:
What would you say if I offered to make you absolute ruler of the Federation? No President, no Starfleet Chief of Staff, just you.

Benjamin Sisko:
I'd say your psychographic profile of me isn't as good as you think.

Weyoun:
(laughs richly) Just doing my job.

Worf:
It has come to my attention that Omet'iklan has made a threat against your life.

Benjamin Sisko:
I didn't think it was public knowledge.

Worf:
You told Commander Dax.

Benjamin Sisko:
Well, that explains it.

[Dax is trying to work, but Virak'kara is staring at her]

Jadzia Dax:
Am I really that interesting? You've been standing there staring at me for the last two hours.

Virak'kara:
You are part of my combat team. I must learn to understand your behaviour, anticipate your actions.

Jadzia Dax:
There must be something you'd rather do. Maybe get some sleep?

Virak'kara:
We don't sleep.

Jadzia Dax:
How about getting something to eat?

Virak'kara:
The white is the only thing we need.

Jadzia Dax:
Don't sleep, don't eat. What do you do for relaxation?

Virak'kara:
Relaxation would only make us weak.

Jadzia Dax:
You people are no fun at all. I'm glad I'm not a Jem'Hadar woman.

Virak'kara:
There are no Jem'Hadar women.

Jadzia Dax:
So what do you do? Lay eggs?

Virak'kara:
Jem'Hadar are bred in birthing chambers. We are able to fight within three days of our emergence.

Jadzia Dax:
Lucky you. So let me get this straight—no sleep, no food, no women. No wonder you're so angry. After thirty or forty years of that, I'd be angry too.

Virak'kara:
No Jem'Hadar has ever lived thirty years.

Jadzia Dax:
[puzzled] How old are you?

Virak'kara:
I am eight.

Jadzia Dax:
I would have guessed at least fifteen.

Virak'kara:
Few Jem'Hadar live that long. If we reach twenty, we are considered honored elders. [leans in] How old are you?

Jadzia Dax:
I stopped counting at three hundred.

Virak'kara:
[amazed] You don't look it.

Jadzia Dax:
Thank you.

Omet'iklan:
I am First Omet'iklan, and I am dead. As of this moment, we are all dead. We go into battle to reclaim our lives. This we do gladly, for we are Jem'Hadar. Remember, victory is life.

Jem'Hadar:
Victory is life.

[The Jem'Hadar march out.]

Weyoun:
Such a delightful people.

Miles O'Brien:
I am Chief Miles Edward O'Brien. I am very much alive and I intend to stay that way.

Benjamin Sisko:
Amen!

Julian Bashir:
I was looking forward to tomorrow—to see Kira again, asking, "How was the nebula? And by the way, I cured that blight thing those people had."

Jadzia Dax:
It's not a crime to believe in yourself.

Julian Bashir:
These people believed in me, and look where it got them. Trevian was right—there is no cure. The Dominion made sure of that, and I was so arrogant, I thought I could find one in a week!

Jadzia Dax:
Maybe it was arrogant to think that. But it's even more arrogant to think that there isn't a cure just because you couldn't find it.

[Garak sneaks up behind a holographic 'Quark' and breaks his neck]

Elim Garak:
How was that?

Quark:
Awful! Did you hear that sound of bone snapping? I don't want that to be the last thing I hear!

Elim Garak:
It wasn't that loud.

Quark:
You don't have these ears. Snapping vertebrae is out.

Elim Garak:
We're running out of options, Quark. You don't want to be vaporized because you need a body. The disruptor ruined your clothing, the knife was too savage, the nerve gas smelled bad, hanging took too long, and poison... What was wrong with poison?

Quark:
It doesn't work. If I know the food is poisoned, I won't eat it. [motions to the "corpse"] Could you get rid of this? The sight of it is making me sick.

Elim Garak:
Computer, remove corpse. [it vanishes] For a man who wants to kill himself, you are strangely determined to live.

Quark:
I'm going to die; don't you worry about that. I just want to find the right way.

Elim Garak:
"Right way"?

Quark:
I don't want to see it coming, or hear it, or feel it, or smell it. I just want to go on with my life, and then... I'm dead.

Elim Garak:
Ah. You want to be surprised.

Quark:
Exactly. I want to wake up in the Divine Treasury and have no idea how I got there.

Elim Garak:
I see. Perhaps that can be arranged.

Quark:
Really?

Elim Garak:
You have my word. You'll never know what hit you.

Rom:
Rule of Acquisition Number 17: “A contract is a contract is a contract. But only between Ferengi.”

Grand Nagus Gint:
I am Gint, the first Grand Nagus!

Quark:
You look like my brother, Rom.

Grand Nagus Gint:
That's because this is a dream, you imbecile!

Quark:
A dream. That explains why this place looks so tacky.

Grand Nagus Gint:
Never be afraid to mislabel a product.

Miles O'Brien:
It's funny. I've served on half a dozen different ships and none of them have had cloaking devices except the Defiant. Now that we're not using it, I feel naked.

Worf:
It is disconcerting, to say the least.

Benjamin Sisko:
Gentlemen, I feel the same breeze you do.

[Dax smiles]

Miles O'Brien:
What are you smiling at?

Jadzia Dax:
I don't know. I guess it's just being in the same room as so many naked men.

[after Garak inquires about Cardassian survivors of the attack on the Founders' homeworld]

Female Changeling:
There were no Cardassian survivors.

Elim Garak:
[shocked] You mean... they're all dead?

Female Changeling:
They're dead. You're dead. Cardassia is dead. Your people were doomed the moment they attacked us. I believe that answers your question.

[a beat; Garak smiles politely]

Elim Garak:
It was a pleasure meeting you.