Mama Bear:
Dear, just look at these lovely rooms.
Papa Bear:
But what? Rooms? What rooms? Help! Where am I?
Mama Bear:
These model tree house rooms in "Treehouse Keeping" magazine. Aren't they lovely?
Papa Bear:
Oh, they're nice enough, I suppose. But certainly, no lovelier than the rooms in our very own tree house. This lovely, gracious neat is a thin living room, cozy, warm, comfortable in the extreme.
Mama Bear:
Oh, it's alright, I suppose.
Papa Bear:
And our delightful dining room, a room to be proud of. Floor clean enough to eat off. Not to mention the table.
Mama Bear:
Yes, but–
Papa Bear:
And, of course, your wonderful spick-and-span, perfectly delicious kitchen, a model room if ever there was one.
Mama Bear:
Yes, but–
Papa Bear:
Yes, but what?
Mama Bear:
Yes, but there's one place in this treehouse I'm not proud of. Brother and Sister's room is a mess, a perfectly dreadful knock-down drag-out wall-to-wall mess. And I'm not going to stand for it any longer! I've put up with that messy room long enough!
Papa Bear:
Well, dear. I've got some urgent work to do in my shop.
[Meanwhile in Brother and Sister's bedroom]
Brother Bear:
For Pete's sake, Sister, will you take your shot? We're playing tiddlywinks, not chess.
Sister Bear:
Just hold your horses. I didn't get to be tiddlywinks champ of Bear Country School by rushing my shot...!
[The cubs hear Mama's footsteps banging in the hallway floor, approaching the cubs' bedroom.]
Sister Bear:
What's that? An earthquake?
Brother Bear:
Worse, it's Mama on the war path. Climbing the stairs.
Sister Bear:
Stomping along the hall.
Brother Bear:
Pounding on the door.
[Mama Bear pounds on the door]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
[in sing-songy voice] ♪ Come in. ♪
Mama Bear:
[pushes the door, which pushes the toys in the way]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
[in sing-songy voice] Hi, Mama.
Mama Bear:
Grrr... [notices the messy bedroom, and notices many spiders and cobwebs] Pretty nice collection of spiders you've found up here.
Sister Bear:
Yes, they're very useful. They eat the ants that come in for food crumbs.
Mama Bear:
Very clever. Isn't it hard to get around...I mean, in all this mess?
Brother Bear:
Not really. Watch.
[Brother playing pogo stick.]
Mama Bear:
Very impressive!
[Mama tries to get Brother and Sister's closet door to open.]
Mama Bear:
HOW DO YOU GET THIS CLOSET DOOR TO OPEN!?
Sister Bear:
Well, we don't bother. We just sort of hang our clothes in different places around the room.
Mama Bear:
[smiles] Most impressive. In fact...!
[Then her smile returns, and resumes back to angry outbursts.]
Mama Bear:
THIS IS THE MOST IMPRESSIVE MESS I PERSONALLY HAVE EVER SEEN! THE FILTHIEST, DIRTIEST, AND MOST DISGUSTING MESS KNOWN TO BEARS! UNQUESTIONABLY THE NUMBER ONE MESSY ROOM IN ALL BEAR COUNTRY! DESTINED TO GO DOWN IN THE FILTHY, DIRTY HALL OF FAME! AND I AM JUST NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANY LONGER! I HAVE HAD IT! NO MORE MRS. NICE GUY (EVER AGAIN)! THE TIME HAS DEFINITELY COME FOR ME TO PUT MY FOOT DOWN!
[When Mama "puts her foot down", she accidentally stomps on Brother's airplane cement. When she says, "No more Mrs. Nice Guy!", that means she is through --about the room-- being Mr. Nice Little Bear.]
Sister Bear:
Yecch!
Brother Bear:
Yeah, Mama. You have had a perfect right to put your foot down. But when you did it, you put it down right on my airplane cement.
Mama Bear:
THAT DOES IT! THAT DOES IT! NOW HEAR THIS! I WANT THIS ENTIRE ROOM CLEAN! AND FOR STARTERS, I WANT THIS ENTIRE ROOM PICKED UP! PICKED UP CLEAN! AND I WANT IT DONE IN EXACTLY....!
[She points to the cat clock --that is, as the scene cuts to the clock.]
Mama Bear:
FIFTEEN MINUTES!
[Cut to the cubs.]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
[told they are supposed to tidy up their messy bedroom in 15 minutes] FIFTEEN MINUTES!?
[Cut back to Mama.]
Mama Bear:
[frustratingly leaves the bedroom and gives the cubs a chance to clean their bedroom] YOU HEARD ME! FIFTEEN MINUTES!
[She leaves the bedroom. The cubs have three to fifteen minutes to clean up their room.]
Brother Bear:
Anyway, that stuff she picked up with her foot as a start.
Sister Bear:
Look, we don't have time for smart remarks. You've got some heavy picking up to do.
Brother Bear:
I've got some heavy picking up to do. How do you figure that? Most of this mess is yours.
Sister Bear:
Oh, yeah? What about these? Your baseball cards? Your ball, bat, and glove?
Brother Bear:
Oh yeah? What about these? Your farm animals? Your stuffed bunny?!
[Brother kicks Sister's stuffed bunny.]
Sister Bear:
WELL, IF YOU'RE SO SMART, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SWEEP UP WITH YOUR DUMB DINOSAUR TOYS ALL OVER THE FLOOR?!
[Sister sweeps up Brother's dinosaur collection with the broom.]
Brother Bear:
THEY'RE NOT TOYS! THEY'RE MODELS! AND YOU LEAVE THEM ALONE! I'M WORKING ON A SET UP OF THE PLEISTOCENE AGE!
Sister Bear:
PLEISTOCENE, SCHMEISTOCENE! (MESOZOIC ERA, MY FOOT!) THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR KICKING MY STUFFED BUNNY!
[The cubs pause the argument and notice the time.
Sister Bear:
[looks at the cat clock] You know something?
Brother Bear:
What?
Sister Bear:
This isn't getting the job done and the minutes are ticking by.
Brother Bear:
We better get to work.
[They cleaned up and tired.]
Brother Bear:
Well, what do you think?
Sister Bear:
What do I think? I think we're in big trouble.
Brother Bear:
And the 15 minutes are almost up.
Sister Bear:
What'll we do?
Brother Bear:
I'm thinking. I'm thinking. I'm...thinking I have a creative idea.
Sister Bear:
We sure could use one. Mama's gonna have a fit if we don't get this whole mess off the floor and out of sight.
Brother Bear:
Precisely!
[The cubs --Brother and Sister-- quickly pick up their toys. And they hide the mess in their closet. Then cut back to Mama onscreen. As Mama is in her rocking chair and reading a book, she's keeping track of the time. Before standing back up, she --seriously-- looks at her watch.]
Mama Bear:
15 MINUTES? 15 MINUTES! TIME IS UP!
[Mama zips out of her rocking chair. She opens Brother and Sister's bedroom door, then Brother and Sister reveal the room "cleaned".]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
[cheering] TA-DA!
[Mama --briefly-- looks around the cubs's bedroom.]
Mama Bear:
This is wonderful! I can actually see the floor.
Brother Bear:
Yeah, you can get around the room without a pogo stick.
Mama Bear:
[proudly] And look! The floor is clean! And in any language, you can actually open the...!
[Mama is about to open the closet door.]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
[alarmed and pleadingly tells Mama to not open the closet door] NO MAMA! DON'T OPEN THE...!
Mama Bear:
[proudly] (...closet door, indeed.)
[But Mama opens the closet door anyway. Then all of the cubs's toys fell out and the room reveals to become a mess again. That is, after the cubs tried hiding the mess in their closet.]
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
CLOSET!
[Mama grits her teeth since she is covered up by the cubs's toys. Then she gets up and furiously marches out of the room. She goes down to the basement, gets out a giant box, and writes down the word "TRASH" on it. Then she goes upstairs with it and sets it down onto the floor.]
Brother Bear:
What are you going to do, Mama?
Sister Bear:
What's the box for?
[Mama Bear picks up one toy after another and starts to throw away some of the cubs's favorite things.]
Mama Bear:
IT IS FOR ALL THIS TRASH! (THE FIRST THING WE HAVE TO DO IS GET RID OF ALL THIS JUNK!)
[The cubs then watch in horror as Mama throws away some of their favorite things into the trash box.]
Sister Bear:
[picks up a book trying to get it back] NO, MAMA! NO!
Brother Bear:
[trying to get back his sport cards] MY BASEBALL CARDS AREN'T TRASH!
Mama Bear:
ALL THIS IS GOOD-FOR-NOTHING! NOTHING BUT THROW-AWAY TRASH!
Sister Bear:
[takes out her doll, coloring book, and crayons trying to get it back out of the box] THAT IS NOT TRASH! THAT IS MY BEST DOLL! NOT MY COLORING BOOK AND CRAYONS! HELP! HELP! PLEASE!
[Cut to the workshop where Papa is sawing wood when he hears Brother and Sister's cry for help as Mama throws away some of their favorite things. That is, including Brother's dinosaur collection and baseball glove. See in Brother's next quote.]
Brother Bear:
[offscreen] PLEASE MAMA! NOT MY DINOSAUR COLLECTION! (THAT IS NOT JUNK!) STOP! THAT'S MY BASEBALL MITT!
Brother Bear and Sister Bear:
HELP! OH NO! HELP!
Papa Bear:
Cries for help! [runs into the house, and enters the bedroom] QUIEEEEEEEET! [seeing the mess in the cubs' bedroom that Mama made] Well, the mess certainly has built up in this room. In fact, it's the worst case of messy build-up I've ever seen. But now let's sit down and talk this over calmly. [the scene cuts to him and the cubs] So you see, this messy room isn't fair. It isn't fair to your Mama and me. We have a lot of other things to take care of. But it isn't fair to you cubs, because you really can't have fun or relax in a room that's such a terrible mess. What you need is a little organization and maybe a box.
Brother Bear:
Not a trash box.
Papa Bear:
No, a toy box. I'll make you one and maybe a lot of other little boxes for you games and collections.
Sister Bear:
And how about one of those boards with all the holes in it. Like you'll have in your shop.
Papa Bear:
A pegboard. Good idea.
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