Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #250

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,008 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Hurshe:
Sorry you had to witness that, my lovelies. Ham's cooking gave my ass a double penetration of di-yi-yi-- [snoring]

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
Damn! Boy, scouring every cranny for your bottom bitch surely stirs up a mighty hunger! Hmm. Reckon I'll ralph down some of Ham's Stovetop Victuals.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Meemaw:
Your baby is not NORMAL! Shedding my current vessel is the only chance we have to avert the most profound calamity the universe has ever known-- The Comening!

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
I'm a raise you with care and pride, hidden away like a shameful secret.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
Shh, shh, shh, shh. Keep quiet. I don't want to set off my little wall dumplings. Whoo-hoo! Hey, why don't you go get comfy while I go wake my cuddle slave to give you a psychegasm?

Bar Redneck:
My heart is a rock-hard and ready to plop.

Hurshe:
What?! It's gone! Where's my baby?!

Bar Redneck:
You're gonna go broke without that thing.

[Bar Redneck literally snatch his money back from Hurshe before saying it]

Hurshe:
Broke?! My baby! My bab-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y!

[Singing Basses played out of nowhere]

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Britchard:
Sorry, Sheriff, but there's a three-month waiting list to see Hurshe right now. This new level of love that she has been peddling is all the rage. I tell you, when you snuggle up to that little creature she got, you are overcome by the illusion that this world ain't the torture chamber of misery that it actually is.

Sheriff:
[upset] Yeah. Guess I'll just head home to the [vomiting] light of my life.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurlan:
Blackity black! Blacky black! Dang! Three days, and not even any of the scat I found tasted negroid.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
I will never give up my precious little boy to you! 'Cause I think I can pimp this bundle of joy out to every loveless creep in the Holler-- Get me so rich and upper class, I could buy me a singin' bass.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
Why, I've never felt a deeper loving bond. This exquisite bliss of cuddling this makes me radiately aware I'm connected to an infinite oneness.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
How long is this gonna take?! I got a lot on my slut plate!

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
Your boys are hung like horseworms and ready to pound some ovum.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
I'll crack open Ham...

[literally cuts open Hambrosia]

Doc:
...and snatch her eggs.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
We do this turkey-style. Fill this with baster paste. Here's some chick lit to help you slop your gobbler.

Sheriff:
Okey strokey.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
Exciting news! Meemaw thinks it's time you and me had a baby!

Sheriff:
But, chicken, God was too nauseous to bless you with a soggy box. You're plain as puke down there.

Hambrosia:
I hired a surrogate. You'll sir her gut.

Hurshe:
Let's chop-chop this boot knock! I got poon to peddle!

Sheriff:
Oh, shucks! I get to shuck your sister, on the up and up and-- Ohh! Ohhhhh! [jizzed hisself] I'm just gonna need a minute to get hard again.

Hambrosia:
No, sills. We'll do it surgically.

Sheriff:
Aw, shucks! But for real this time!

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Sheriff:
I got us a new toy, baby! Come peel my carrot!

Hurshe:
You're gonna have to toss your own salad. I got a job across town. Ho dough before honey, honey.

Sheriff:
But I roided up my nugs for you! My sack wrigglers is chompin at the tip of my bit!

Hurshe:
Yech! You got scroat rage! Ugh!

Sheriff:
[upset] Guess I'll just head home to my... [vomiting] lovely wife.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
This town is cursed with a secret. And the secret is... everybody knows the town is cursed, but everybody thinks it's a secret! Only, the real secret is...

Meemaw:
IT IS! [gargled scream]

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
Who are you, again?

Sheriff:
I'm your knight in shining amour, who holds devotion above all. You know, your sister's husband.

[Hurshe starts to strongly choke Sheriff]

Hurshe:
Oh, yeah? Well, then you better swear by the cream in your jeans that you'll find a way to put me in charge of Heartshe Holler, even if you have to wipe Heartshe Holler off the ass of God's face to do it!

Sheriff:
Cross my cream... and hope to grind.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
I'm coming for you, Daddy!

[exhales sharply]

Hurshe:
Ooh, I'm coming, Daddy.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
The dong swaperation was a success. But I found this tucked inside your papa's nethers.

[Hurlan licks the tape]

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
So, can I have the town now, Daddy?

Boss Hoss:
You possess a mouth like you got an E-Z glide strip on the inside of your lip. But the answer's still no. [laughs]

Hurshe:
I hate you, Daddy! I'm gonna kill myself so I can come get you in the afterlife!

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
I wanna own this town so bad, Daddy! Won't you change your mind?

Boss Hoss:
My mind is being changed right now.

Hurshe:
Oh-ho! You're damn right it is! I can be very puss-suasive. Mouth *puss* that is.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
I just need you to take that red envelope over to the Doc, and you tell him I said your brain is perfect.

Hurlan:
Ha! Mwah! Hot dog!

[Hurlan leaves]

Boss Hoss:
Perfect to be removed and replaced with my brain...so I can continue to reign supreme.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
Life began 13.7 billion years ago today, when a disgusting mutant crawled out of the primordial ooze and hollered, "I am God! And I don't care for queers!"

Hurlan:
Hot dog!

Boss Hoss:
I posit the peak of the industrial revolution was the E-Z glide strip.

Hurlan:
Hot dog.

Boss Hoss:
[chuckling] And so we dropped the atom bomb on them, and they totally forgave us! [laughs] It was hilarious!

Hurlan:
[chinese accent] Oh, hot dog!

Boss Hoss:
The E-Z glide strip does all the work for you. It's like having a slave for your face. Only this slave won't rise up and hold a razor to your throat.

Hurlan:
Hot dog.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
Son, there are so many, many things as a father I feel I never got the chance to say to you. So the first thing I'm gonna teach you is what words are.

Boss Hoss:
Words are-- Well, like "Hot dog."

Hurlan:
Hahbuhrguh.

Boss Hoss:
No. Hot Dog.

Hurlan:
Hamburger.

Boss Hoss:
Hot dog.

Hurlan:
Hamburger.

Boss Hoss:
No, damn it. You got a lot to catch up on.

– The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

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