Wikidude's Quotes Page #5,510

Here's the list of quotes submitted by wikidude  —  There are currently 140,397 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Buddy Love:
Ladies and gentlemen, for my final demonstration - look out, David Copperfield - I'm about to make a 400-pound fat man... disappear FOREVER! [produces a vial of serum]

Jason:
[off-screen] NOOO!!! [enters the auditorium; angrily advances towards the stage] Wait! I can not... let you do this... any more! This... has got... to stop! [runs onto the stage; stands next to Buddy and points at him] This man is trying to kill Professor Sherman Klump!

Papa Klump:
Oh, that's it! I'm glad I brought my knife! [reaches into his pocket]

Mama Klump:
Mm-hmm. And I got my razor. [opens her purse]

Jason:
[to Buddy] Hand over the vial now!

Buddy Love:
Oh, sure thing, hamster boy! But first, a short musical interlude! [punches Jason, sending him flying into some trombones; the audience gasps]

Carla Purty:
[angry] BUDDY! What has gotten into you, and where's Sherman?!

Buddy Love:
Sherman is GONE! Disappeared! [more gasps; Mama and Papa Klump look at each other in confusion] And that's a pretty good trick for a man with an ass as big as his! [his watch beeps] Ooh, I'm late for an appointment. Ladies and gentlemen, say goodbye to Sherman Klump! [prepares to drink the vial, but Jason pops back up]

Jason:
I hate being called "hamster boy". [punches Buddy, causing him to drop the vial; the audience gasps again. He then clutches his fist in pain]

Buddy Love:
[amused] You just don't know when to quit, do you? [goes to punch Jason again, but Sherman's fist appears instead of his; the audience gasps once more]

The Nutty Professor  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[During this 'fight', the alternating control of Klump/Love's joint body is represented by Love's normal face 'bulging out' to resemble Sherman's]

Buddy Love:
Sherman, don't do this! YOU NEED ME!!!!!

Sherman Klump:
NO, I DON'T!

Buddy Love:
[slaps Sherman] You fat ass!

Sherman Klump:
[slaps Buddy] Tinkerbell!

Buddy Love:
[slaps Sherman] Blubber butt!

Sherman Klump:
[slaps Buddy] Featherweight!

Papa Klump:
Somebody better call an exorcist!

Buddy Love:
Sherman! Sherman! YOU CAN'T BEAT ME!!!!!

Papa Klump:
This is some scary shit!

Sherman Klump:
[punches Buddy several times] YES... I... CAN!!!!!

[Buddy's watch beeps; he starts to feel dizzy]

Mama Klump:
Sherman, come back here! [claps her hands] Sherman!

Buddy Love:
[clutches his head] What's happenin' to me? Everything's gettin' real dark! Oh, I feel real jiggly! I'm blubbifyin'! Sherman, you needed me! I taught you to be confident! You needed me, Sherman! Sherman, no matter what, no matter what... you got to strut...

The Nutty Professor  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Carla Purty:
You know something I couldn't stand about Buddy?

Sherman Klump:
What's that?

Carla Purty:
He was too damn scrawny.

The Nutty Professor  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Pregnant Woman:
I'm always telling those kids to stop singing that terrible murderer's song… and they do nothing but sing it at the top of their voices all day… As if we hadn't heard enough of that killer.

Mrs. Beckmann:
Oh, leave them alone. As long as they're singing, at least we know they're still there.

M  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hans Beckert:
And who are you?

Elderly Lawyer:
I have the dubious honor of being your defense counsel. But I am afraid it won't be much use to you.

M  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hans Beckert:
[horrified] But… but… do you want to kill me then? Murder me, just like that?

Schränker:
We just want to render you harmless. That's what we want. But you'll only be harmless when you're dead.

M  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hans Beckert:
I demand to be handed over to the jurisdiction of the common law!

Criminal 1:
Quite a performance! That's not bad, that, ha, ha, ha!

Schränker:
That would suit you, wouldn't it?

Conman:
[sarcastically] Anything else you'd like?

Schränker:
So that you can invoke paragraph fifty-one…

Criminal 2:
That's it.

Schränker:
And spend the rest of your life in an institution at the state's expense ... And then you'd escape… or else there'd be a pardon and there you are, free as air, with a pass, protected by the law because of mental illness. Off again chasing little girls. No, no. Very dry. We're not going to let that happen.

M  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

President Sergio Osmena:
You see, General, my people are going to laugh if I fell in deep water. I cannot swim!

Gen. Douglas MacArthur:
That's not so bad, Mr. President. Everyone's about to see that I can't walk on water.

MacArthur  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Lt. Gen. Richard K. Sutherland:
Inchon has some of the highest tides in the world, but only once a month do they reach a height sufficient for our largest landing craft to go in. There are maybe two three-hour periods when MacArthur can put troops ashore. Which is not enough time for a major amphibious landing.

Gen. Sampson:
Exactly. This is little more than a trench in the mudflats. If every possible handicap were listed, Inchon has them all.

Lt. Gen. Richard K. Sutherland:
However, gentlemen, MacArthur claims that these very handicaps are what he's counting on. He feels that the enemy won't believe that anyone would try to surmount such obstacles. The element of surprise will be his most valuable ally.

President Harry S. Truman:
[Looks at Gen. George C. Marshall] What do you think of His Majesty's plan?

Gen. George C. Marshall:
It's daring... it's brilliant... and it's dangerous.

MacArthur  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[MacArthur arrives at front lines and starts to get out of jeep]

Soldier:
General, sir! Excuse me, sir, but we just killed a Jap sniper here not five minutes ago!

Gen. Douglas MacArthur:
Fine, son! That's the best thing to do with 'em!

MacArthur  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Harry Truman:
I oughta kick his insubordinate ass right into the Sea of Japan. The lousiest trick he's pulled; I traveled 14,000 miles to reach an understanding face-to-face, and he still thinks he can do exactly what he damn well pleases!

Aide:
Can you imagine he actually sent a message to the Chinese threatening to destroy their forces unless they would negotiate a solution with him personally?

Harry Truman:
You know, there's a story, where Abe Lincoln was tryin' to mount a horse that was skittish. And the horse kicked a hind hoof into the stirrup. So Lincoln says to 'im, "If you're gonna get on, I'll get off." Well, I'm not gettin' off. I think Roosevelt shoulda- shoulda pulled Wainwright outta Corregidor and left that five-star brass hat MacArthur there to be the martyr.

Aide:
What shall I do with the cease-fire proposal?

Harry Truman:
Scrap it. I can't approach the Chinese on any political basis; not after this. That man's tryin' to start World War III and I'm tryin' to prevent it. I'll fire that brass hat prima donna right now. The hell does he think he is? God? Now, what do you think Congress'll do if I relieve the big general?

Aide:
Congress would flay you alive.

[In the aftermath of MacArthur's dismissal from command in Korea and recall to the United States, Truman's approval ratings plummeted. In February 1952 his approval rating stood at 22%, a record low until George W. Bush in 2008.]

MacArthur  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Train agent:
That must be your friend over there. They didn't leave much of him (pointing to the Nightrider's coffin).

Bubba Zanetti:
Must have cut his heart out, eh?

Train agent:
Yeah. That's what I meant. Poor bastard...

Toecutter:
(intimidating the agent) The Nightrider, that is his name. The Nightrider.

Train agent:
(scared) The Nightrider...

Toecutter:
Remember him when you look up the night sky.

Train agent:
I will.

Toecutter:
Take your hat off.

Train agent:
(takes his hat off) Anything you say?

Toecutter:
Anything I say... What a wonderful philosophy you have! Take him away. (after a pause) Bubba, Johnny...(makes the sound of a candle being blown out)

Mad Max  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

(after a multiple auto accident, Jim the Goose slides his motorcycle across the pavement and comes to a halt next to a pick-up truck)

Pick-up truck driver:
Oh my God! What happened?

Jim the Goose:
I don't know, man, I just got here myself!

Mad Max  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Nux:
He's gonna be so grateful! We could ask for anything. I want to drive the War Rig. What will you ask for?

Max:
[rips jacket off Nux] That's my jacket.

Nux:
Sure. I mean, you could ask for more than a jacket.

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[After Splendid Angharad is grazed by a bullet fired by Max]

Imperator Furiousa:
How are you?

The Splendid Angharad:
It hurts.

Imperator Furiousa:
Out here, everything hurts. [Turns to the rest of the Five Wives] You wanna get through this? Do as I say. Now, pick up what you can, and run.

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Nux:
Three times the gates were open to me.

Capable:
What gates?

Nux:
I was awaited in Valhalla. They were calling my name. I should be walking with the Immortan. Feasting with the heroes of all time.

Capable:
I'd say it was your manifest destiny not to.

Nux:
I thought I was being spared for something great. I got to...drive a pursuit vehicle. For a while even Larry and Barry stop chewing on my windpipe.

Capable:
Who're Larry and Barry?

Nux:
[pointing to his tumors] My mates. Larry and Barry. If they don't get me, the Night Fevers will.

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Imperator Furiousa:
They are looking for hope.

Max:
What about you?

Imperator Furiousa:
Redemption.

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Max proposes turning back and claiming the Citadel]

The Vuvalini:
What's there to find at the Citadel?

Max:
Green.

Toast:
And water. There's a ridiculous amount of clear water. And a lot of crops.

The Dag:
It's got everything you need, as long as you're not afraid of heights.

Keeper of the Seeds:
Where does the water come from?

Toast:
[regarding Immortan Joe] He pumps it up from deep within the earth. He calls it "Aqua Cola" and claims it all for himself.

The Dag:
And because he owns it, he owns all of us.

Keeper of the Seeds:
I don't like him already.

The Valkyrie:
It'll take two weeks to skirt the wall of mountains.

Max:
No. I suggest we go back the same way we came. Through the canyon.

Toast:
[after a pause] It's open - we know that, right? He brought all his war parties through.

Max:
So we take the War Rig and charge it right through the middle of them. We can decouple the tanker at the pass, shut it off behind us.

Keeper of the Seeds:
[she and the Dag make the same gesture] Kaboom!

Imperator Furiosa:
And how exactly do we take the Citadel, assuming we're still alive by then?

Toast:
If we can block the pass, it'll be easy. All that's left are his War Pups, and War Boys too sick to fight.

Capable:
And we'll be with Nux. He's a War Boy. He'll be bringing us home, bringing back what's stolen, as he's meant to.

[Everyone turns to look at Nux]

Nux:
Yeah... feels like hope.

Keeper of the Seeds:
I like this plan... we could start again, just like the old days!

Max:
Look, it'll be a hard day. [points to the horizon] But I guarantee you that a hundred and sixty days ride that way... there's nothing but salt. [points back] At least that way we might be able to... together... come across some kind of redemption.

[He holds out his hand. After a pause, Furiosa takes it and clasps tight]

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[At night, a white dot falls from the sky]

Toast:
Look.

V-Melita:
That's what you call a satellite.

Toast:
Miss Giddy told us about those. They used to bounce messages across the earth.

V-Melita:
Shows. Everyone in the old world had a show.

Toast:
Do you think there's somebody still out there? Sending shows?

V-Melita:
[Looking out across the empty desert] Who knows? Those are the plains of silence.

Mad Max: Fury Road  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Max takes a shotgun shell off a dead body, loads it into his shotgun]

Gyro Captain:
How do we know that one's not a dud?

Max:
[Points the gun at the Gyro Captain] Find out.

Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Papagallo:
How's the rig?

Zetta:
[shouting to the mechanics] The rig! How is she?

Mechanic:
[to his assistant] It's got a cracked timing case cover and it's broken a couple of teeth off the timing gear.

Mechanic's Assistant:
[shouting to Zetta] It's got a cracked timing case cover, it's broken a couple of teeth off the timing gear...

Mechanic:
The radiator's damaged to the core.

Mechanic's Assistant:
...the radiator's damaged to the core...

Mechanic:
It's got a cracked water pump.

Mechanic's Assistant:
...it's got a cracked water pump...

Mechanic:
A fractured injector line.

Mechanic's Assistant:
...it's got a fractured injector line!

Papagallo:
Well, what does all that mean?

Zetta:
[shouting to the mechanics] Yeah, okay, but what does that mean?

Mechanic's Assistant:
[to the Mechanic] What does that mean?

Mechanic:
Twenty four hours.

Mechanic's Assistant:
[to Papagallo] Twenty four hours?

Papagallo:
[after a pause] They've got twelve!

Zetta:
[to the mechanics] You've got twelve!

Mechanic:
Okay.

Mechanic's Assistant:
[to Zetta] Okay!

Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

The Collector:
People come here to trade, make a little profit, do a little business. If you have nothing to trade, you've got no business in Bartertown.

Max:
An hour on the inside. That's all.

The Collector:
Next!

Max:
I've got skills. I can trade them.

The Collector:
Sorry. The brothel's full.

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

The Collector:
If you find him, what then?

Max:
I'll ask him to return what's mine.

The Collector:
Oh, and of course he'll be desperate to clear his conscience.

Max:
He will be.

The Collector:
You that good?

Max:
mmm-hmm

The Collector:
Perhaps you've got something to trade after all.

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Max:
So what's the plan?

Pig Killer:
Plan? There ain't no plan!

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

We need you!

Help us build the largest authors community and quotes collection on the web!

Quiz

Are you a quotes master?

»
Who said, “Hope is the power of being cheerful in circumstances that we know to be desperate.”
A G.K. Chesterton
B C.S. Lewis
C Desmond Tutu
D Christopher Reeve