Wikidude's Quotes Page #200

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[Ricky fills up a pitcher of Kool-Aid with a garden hose that's duct-taped to the side of his car] Ricky: You know, ever since you guys have been around with your TV cameras, Julian's changed. You know, he's getting all frustated and he's taking his problems out on me and other people in the park... It's crazy! He lives in there in a palace and he's all stressed out! I live out here in a car and I've got everything I need and I'm happy! I mean, this is my home. So I don't know what his problem is. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Farmer comes out with a shotgun] Ricky: Let's go. Whoa, whoa, whoa. who the fuck is that guy? What do you want?! Julian: Relax, Ricky. Ricky What do you want?! Farmer: WHAT'S GOING ON?! Ricky: Nothing. [Farmer shoots at them] Sound Guy: FUCK! AH FUCK! Donny: WHAT IN THE FUCK?! Julian: Get in the truck! Sound Guy: I'M FUCKING SHOT! Ahh, fuck! [Julian drags Sound Guy in the truck] Julian: RICKY, GET IN THE TRUCK! Sound Guy: FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK! Julian: GET IN THE TRUCK! Sound Guy: FUCK! Cover me, man! I'm fucking shot again here! [Julian fires off shots] Sound Guy: I'M FUCKING SHOT!!! Julian: HOLD YOUR FIRE!! SOMEBODY'S HURT HERE!!!!! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Ricky and Julian are trying to break into a barn to steal a riding lawn mower} Julian: Here you go, break in. [Hands Ricky a crowbar] Ricky: Why do I have to break in? Julian: Because this is all your fault and I'm in charge! Hurry up! Ricky: It's your fault. You gave me the dog, you idiot. Julian: Hurry up! [Ricky takes the crowbar and pries the door open, an alarm sounds] Ricky: Jesus Christ! [Ricky draws a pistol and shoots into the barn, silencing the alarm] Ricky: Who the fuck puts an alarm system in a barn? Fuckin' idiots! [Ricky and Julian are struggling to push the lawn mower out of the barn, Ricky falls down and an inflatable raft falls down on top of him. He gets up and angrily slams the raft back up against the wall while the sound man leans over the lawn mower, attempting to catch it all] [Ricky grabs the boom mic] Ricky: Hey retard! Can you hear me? I need a hand in here! Come fuckin' help us! [The sound man puts the lawn mower into neutral, allowing them to push it easily] Ricky: Oh, it's in neutral now. Well sorry I'm not so smart. I didn't know that. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Julian is driving Ricky and the dog after Ricky got shot and the dog ate weed brownies] Ricky: It's not my fault. You're the one that left the dog with me. I didn't wanna look after him anyway. Julian: Ricky, Ricky, I was gone for forty-five minutes. Ricky: Look, I'm bleeding to death here. Just get me to a doctor and shut up! Julian: Oh, take you to the doctor. What's gonna happen? The police will get involved Ricky. Think! Ricky: I don't give a. I'M BLEEDIN' TO DEATH HERE! YOU DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT! LOOK AT MY ASS! Julian: I don't care about your ass, Ricky! I gotta call Levi. Ricky: LEVI?! FUCK LEVI! I NEED MEDICAL ATTENTION! Julian: Listen Ricky. If that dog dies I swear to God I'll let you bleed to death. All right?! Ricky: I don't give a fuck about the dog! All right? Julian: SHUT UP! Ricky: WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT?! ME OR THE DOG?! Julian: SHUT UP! Ricky: WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT?! Julian: SHUT UP! [Julian dials Levi's number on the cordless phone] Ricky: Fuckin' bleedin' to death here! Julian: Come on, Levi. [Levi answers] Julian: Levi, thank God. I got a situation on my hands here. Ricky: You fuckin' asshole. What the fuck were you doing eating my brownies? Julian: Ricky has a bullet in his ass and he fed the dog a bunch of weed brownies. Ricky: I DIDN'T FEED THE DOG BROWNIES!!! Julian: YOU FED THE DOG!! Ricky: HE ATE THEM!! Julian: SHUT UP! I'M ON THE PHONE, RICKY!! Ricky: I NEED FUCKIN'!! Julian: SHUT UP!! Ricky: THIS IS FUCKED UP! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Trinity: I shot my Daddy in the bum and Mummy's gonna get mad at me. [Trinity takes a bite of a weed brownie] Trinity: These taste funny! [Trinity throws the weed brownie into the yard] – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Jim is smoking a cigarette, then it cuts to the Shitmobile playing music, then the music stopped when it cut back to Jim and Randy and Julian throws his water bottle out of the Shitmobile] Randy: Made it. Look, he just friggin' littered right in the park for god sakes. Jim: The son of a bitch. Randy: What an asshole. Jim: I don't. Eye. Eye. Goddamn cigarettes everything. [Ricky gives Jim the middle finger] Randy: See, they're just lookin. They're trying to get us goin', eh? Jim: I You know. You know, do you know what recidivism is Randy? Randy: I don't have a clue, Mr. Lahey. Jim: That's when people go back to jail over and over and over. I think we got a couple of A1 class act recidivists up there. Look at him. [Ricky gets out of the Shitmobile to make the the Fuckmobile stop] Ricky: Fuck off! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Julian, listening to his phone messages] Ricky: Julian! It's Ricky here. Just letting you know that, uh, I've thought about this, I feel I have no other options. I'm gonna go down to Lahey's trailer, I'm gonna break in, and I'm basically probably gonna kill Mr. Lahey and I'm thinking about killing Randy as well and I'm gonna take the porno tape back. I've talked to Bubbles about it, he's probably gonna give me a hand because we both can't have this tape floating around. So, anyway, you know, I was kind of counting on you to maybe help plan this, but if you don't want to that's up to you. I just hope you won't feel guilty when me and Bubbles are in jail and you know that you could have prevented a murder. Talk to you later. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Ricky is trying to threaten Jim into relinquishing the porno tape] Ricky: Just remember Lahey, what comes around is all around! Jim: Don't you mean what's all around comes around, Ricky? Ricky: This isn't fuckin' over yet. Jim: That's nice talk to use on television, eh? Don't forget you started this shit storm, Limpy! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
J-Roc: Aight, Soft Serve. Here's what I'm talkin' about. You can't do the X-to-the-X-to-the-X. So we gonna do some SC witcha candy, that's soft-core, right? Know what I'm sayin'? it's still gonna play in hotels and all that and you're still gonna be a star. But Bubbles, you ain't havin' no troubles. You wanna get with her? Bubbles: Well, if it's OK with her I certainly would. J-Roc: That aight? Stacy: Yeah, that's cool. J-Roc: Aight. Stacy: Don't be nervous, Bubbles. I'll take good care of you. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[filming From Russia With The Love Bone] Victoria: Gee, Stacy, I bet we could get like $12,000 for this on the open market. Ricky: Everybody freeze. What's going on here? Stacy: Maybe there's something that we can work out, Sergeant, yes? [Stacy drops and begins unbuckling Ricky's pants] Ricky: Ah, maybe there is, yes. Bubbles: Sergeant Boris. What's going on here? Ricky: Corporal Alexi, we found the motorcycle bandits. They want to work something out. Bubbles: That's them, is it? Let's get it on, then! [Ricky can't get it up] Trevor: Testicle difficulties, please stand by. Ricky: J-Roc, I can't do this. I'm thinking about Lucy, and...I don't know what's, I...I need about 5 minutes here. J-Roc: Aight. Aight, cut. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Bubbles: The whole idea of it's got me pretty damn frisky, too! It's been, uh...Been quite a while since that stuff went on with me. I'm really frisky! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
J-Roc: You know'm sayin' everybody that walk on the face of the Earth tryin' to judge the J-Roc, know'm sayin'? See wha'm sayin'? But I ain't shook, 'cause ma-fuckas tryin' to take me out and stuff, but they can't, right? Know'm sayin'? Tyrone: You're sayin' "know what I'm sayin'" too many times! 80 or 90 times? That's too many times! Once or twice is cool, but 80 or 90 times, man? J-Roc: What are you, from the Department of Know'm Sayin's? You takin' a Know'm Census? You countin' my Know'm Sayin's? We're hangin' out, right? Tyrone: 80 or 90 times? That's too many Know'm Sayin's, know'm sayin'? J-Roc: See wha'm sayin' you're ridin' on my jock, you know'm sayin'? I'm just tryin' to have a good time, you know'm sayin'? and you're countin' my Know'm Sayin's! Tyrone: That's too many times. Once or twice is cool, but 80 or 90 times, know'm sayin'? No... J-Roc: How am I supposed to be myself when you're countin' my Know'm Sayin's all the time, you know'm sayin'? Victoria: J-Roc, I think you're saying it way too much. J-Roc: Sayin' what? [all three simultaneously] J-Roc: Know'm sayin'? Tyrone: Know'm sayin'. Victoria: Know'm sayin'. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
J-Roc: You gonna be a great big star, Gee! Ma-fuckas in Russia... Why do you think Reveen does so good over there, you know what I'm sayin'? You gonna be bigger than Reveen! Put that shit on, get your freak on, it's all good! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Julian: Would you see DeNiro doing a porn flick? Ricky: Well, I don't know. If they paid him enough money he'd probably do one. Julian: No, he wouldn't. You're stupid. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Ricky and Julian are behind the trailer park plinking at bottles] Ricky: Do you ever watch pornos? Julian: Why? Ricky: Just makin' conversation, man. Just wondering what you think of the guys who act in them. Julian: They're greasy. [Ricky shoots and a bullet ricochets, causing Julian to spill his drink] Ricky: Sorry, man. Well, let's suppose for a minute that I act in a porno movie. Would you think I was greasy? 'Cause that's a little different. Julian: You're thinking about doing a porno flick with J-ROC, aren't ya? If you're doing that, then yeah, you'd be real greasy. And stupid. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Julian: Boys, check out Ricky pickin' up some butts! [Ricky is crouched next to a bus stop trash can, picking cigarette butts up off of the ground] Julian: Hey, Ricky! Find any good ones? Ricky: What?! Yeah, like you guys have never smoked a butt, eh? 'Oh, look at Ricky smoking cigarette butts!' I'm sick of this shit! I'm sick of your TV show and I'm sick of you and I'm sick of everybody! I'm moving to Toronto! [Jim rolls past, slowly] Ricky: I'm especially sick of this dick! Get the fuck out of here, Lahey! [Jim drives off] Ricky: Fuck it, man. I'm moving to Toronto and I'm gonna be a street person! I don't care. Julian: Rick, think about it. You don't got no money, man! What are you gonna do? How are you gonna get out there? Ricky: I don't know yet, but I'm gonna get out there. [J-Roc and Tyrone roll up in a Volvo] J-Roc: What's goin' on, honkies?! Ricky: J-Roc? J-Roc: Damn you stank! You should put some Old Spice and some brute up in that ma-fucka! Ricky: Listen, I'm not in the mood today, all right? So unless you've got two grand you wanna lend me, get the fuck out of my face! Tyrone: Hey man, take it easy... Ricky: No, I'm sick of this shit! I'm sick of all you guys! I'm sick of this park... J-Roc: Actually. If you wanna make some scrilla, you pop by my crib. I'll tell ya how to make all kinds of money. I'm serious, too! Ricky: You're gonna make me some money? J-Roc: I'll make you tons of money! Know what I'm sayin'? Pop by my crib. 'Scuse me, Gorilla. We da fuck out! Ricky: Well if you're serious, I'll be down there in about an hour! (to Julian) Looks like I'm not moving to Toronto! – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
[Julian storms out of his trailer and unplugs Ricky's toaster oven from the outdoor power outlet] Ricky: What are you doing, Julian! The chicken fingers aren't even cooked! You want us to get sasparilla or something, you dick! Julian, I'm trying to cook some lunch here for me and my... Julian: Get out of my way. [Julian takes the keys out of the car, turning off the loud blues music] Ray: What are you doing with the tones, Julian?! Julian: Get off my property, Ray! [Julian grabs Ray's wheelchair and rolls him out of the yard] Ray: What what? No, hey, ho, wait! Ricky: Take it easy, take it easy, man! Ray: Nah, forget it, Ricky! If he doesn't want me here I'm goin' man! I'm not wanted here! Ricky: It's my property! Ray: Nah, forget it! Come on down to my house, I got lots of chicken fingers down there, man! Julian: This is my car, this is my property, and this is my toaster! I want you out of here! [Julian dumps Ricky's chicken fingers out of the toaster oven] Ricky: I can't believe you just did that! Those are the good kind! Eight bucks! Julian: I'm not joking, Ricky. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Jim: Ricky, do you want me to ask my friends down at the police station if it's okay for you to be drunk in a public place and carrying a loaded handgun while you're on probation? Ricky: Why do you start doing your job instead of making false incriminations all the time? Jim: Why don't you get a life, Rick? Why don't you go to community college like Julian here? Hey! I got a good idea! You could teach Living In A Car and Growing Dope 101! Ricky: And you could teach how to get drunk, get fired from the police force, become a lousy trailer park supervisor that sucks, hangs around with a fucking idiot that doesn't wear a shirt and looks like a dick but thinks he looks good, 101. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Tess: I'm going to tell you a story. Two women were fighting over one child. It seems they both claimed to be the mother. And they couldn't settle the argument, so they went to wise King Solomon for a judgment. [notices Martin fidgeting in his seat] I know it's an old story, but it's a good one. So listen up. Solomon couldn't tell just by looking at them who was the true parent. And so he called for a sword to cut the baby in two, so that each woman could have a half. And one of the ladies said, "Well, good. That way we'll both lose." And the other lady said, "Oh, please, no, don't. Don't do that. I would rather that the child live with her than be harmed." And that's how Solomon knew the real mother from the pretender. Because the real mother did not care about winning. She just cared about her baby. Martin Ashburn: Well, with all due respect, Your Honor, but that was a case between one real parent and one person pretending to be a parent. I mean, we're both real parents. Tess: But both of you are willing to let your son get torn apart. A real parent wouldn't do that. Your son sees the sword coming. And he's been crying out for help. But you haven't heard him, because you've been so busy arguing all the time. And then he came to us. And we listened. And that's frightening you. Janet Grabowski: Of course it is. No one is going to take my child from me. Tess: Are you going to hold onto him so tightly that he tears in half, and you lose him anyway? Phil Grabowski: Look, he's just confused. We're not losing him. Tess: Not yet. But every time you fight in front of him, you pull further away, and he's more alone and angrier. And one day, that anger is going to express itself in a terribly ugly way. And the two of you are going to look at each other. "What happened? How could such a sweet child turn into such a bitter, hateful creature?" And the answer is, he grew up with two of them. – Touched by an Angel, Season 6 Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Ricky: Smokes, let's go, gimme some smokes. Randy: I've only got two left, I'm not giving you any. Ricky: You're a fucking dick. Lahey, go fuck yourself. – Trailer Park Boys, Season 1 (2001) Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Edmund: Would you care for a fresh pot of tea, Your Ladyship? Lady Penelope Berrington: Thank you, Edmund, but you ... You don't have to call me that anymore. Edmund: I beg to differ, my lady. – Touched by an Angel, Season 8 Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Gloria: [after revealing herself as an angel] Now, granted, I'm not as experienced as some. Well, most. Well, all the angels, actually. But God chose me to talk to you. So there's got to be a reason. Dennis Loggins: Maybe he doesn't think I'm worth wasting an experienced angel on. Gloria: Oh, no, I don't think it's that at all. I think it's because you and I think a lot alike. Dennis Loggins: What, I, I think like an angel? Gloria: No. No, I think like a computer. Or sort of like a computer; I analyze things. And so do you. You think A plus B always has to equal C. You think if you make a lot of money and you're successful, then you'll be happy. And you think if someone's hurt you, then you have to get revenge. But people aren't computers. And relationships aren't equations. And if someone hurts you, revenge isn't the solution. You fell in love with someone who wasn't meant to be yours. Dennis Loggins: That's not true. Gloria: Oh, Dennis, it is true. If Melissa was meant to be yours, she would've been in love with you, too. And I know it hurts to hear that, but think of everything that's happened because you wouldn't believe it. You took the wonderful, positive dreams that you had and used them to create a cruel fantasy of revenge, to force a happy ending on a story that was never meant to be. Well, you have the power to make it happen now. Is it making you happy? Ricky dreamed of being a football star once. And now all he can dream of is to just have his wife for one more year. They've lost their world. All their dreams have changed. And yet, in it all, Ricky has found his soul. While you've come so close to losing yours. In ten years, who has truly become a successful man? Dennis Loggins: [buries his face in his hand and sobs] Oh, my God. I wasted so much time. Gloria: Oh, but God can redeem time, Dennis. God created time. Just as He created you. He loves you. And He's given you all the time that you need right now to do the right thing. Will you do it? Dennis Loggins: I think God knows what He's doing. Because He sure sent me the right angel. – Touched by an Angel, Season 8 Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Monica: Gloria, you will find as you go along that God will give you what you need to know when you need it. The talent to sing, the skill of a surgeon, the eye of a photographer. Why, he's already given you the, the mind of a... Gloria: Computer? I have an unlimited capacity to process and store data and retrieve memory. I mean, I can tell you all the components of that rose over there, but... Monica: But? Gloria: I can't tell you why it's beautiful. Although, I did read this morning that a thing of beauty is a joy forever. Monica: Gloria, you've only been an angel for six days. You need to learn patience. Gloria: I need to learn everything. Tess: Yes, you do, and Monica and I have decided that an angel in training should have a solid background of the classics. Monica: You have a wonderful 21st century sort of mind, but, well, it's hard to be a techno-angel without some context in history. Gloria: History. Of course. I need to learn the history of the cell phone before I start actually using one. Tess: We were thinking of something a little more historical. Monica: We were thinking Genesis, Exodus, the Ten Commandments. Gloria: Ten? Is that all? – Touched by an Angel, Season 8 Show Quote	added 7 months ago
Monica: Hello, uh, Jett. My name is Monica. Do you mind if you answer a few questions? Jett Rudin: Yeah, here's my quote: "Love to ski, hate to talk." Monica: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Jett Rudin: But I'm a sucker for older women, so, uh ... What's your angle? Best shot at Olympic gold? Daredevil on skis? Monica: I thought I'd do a human interest story. Like how it was to grow up with and then compete against your best friend? Jett Rudin: Will's more than a friend; he's like my brother. And we don't compete, we ski together. So, you hit the slopes much? Monica: No. No, I have a hard enough time wearing shoes, let along ski boots. – Touched by an Angel, Season 5 Show Quote	added 7 months ago

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