Wikidude's Quotes Page #5,754

Here's the list of quotes submitted by wikidude  —  There are currently 140,397 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Megan Carter:
Would you tell me the truth, Michael? I'd just please like to know the truth.

Michael Gallagher:
Tell you or the whole world?

Megan Carter:
The truth is the truth.

Michael Gallagher:
No. You wanna know the truth? Ask me as a person, I'll tell you. Ask me as a reporter, I got no comment.

Megan Carter:
That's not fair.

Michael Gallagher:
Not fair to whom? Wait a minute! You don't write the truth. You write what people say. What you overhear, you eavesdrop. You don't come across truth that easy. Maybe it's just what you think, what you feel. I don't need your goddamn newspaper to decide what they're gonna do with me. Or who I am.

Megan Carter:
Then you tell me: Who are you?

Michael Gallagher:
You mean you're not sure yet?

Megan Carter:
No.

Michael Gallagher:
Well... I guess you'll just have to decide for yourself. Who I am and what you are.

– Absence of Malice  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

James A. Wells:
Mr Gallagher...I seem to want to ask if you set all this up. If I do, you ain't gonna tell me, are you? No. You're a smart man, Mr. Gallagher. I'm pretty smart myself. Don't get too smart.

Michael Gallagher:
Everybody in this room is smart, and everybody was just doing their job, and Teresa Perrone is dead. Who do I see about that?

James A. Wells:
Ain't nobody to see. I wish there was. You're excused now, sir.

– Absence of Malice  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

James A. Wells:
What'd you figure you'd do after government service, Elliott?

Elliott Rosen:
I'm not quitting.

James A. Wells:
You ain't no Presidential appointee, Elliott. One that hired you is me. You got thirty days.

– Absence of Malice  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Megan Carter:
Well, you got us all, didn't you Michael?

Michael Gallagher:
[shaking his head] You got yourselves.

– Absence of Malice  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Sarah Wylie:
I need to know how to describe your relationship with Gallagher. Mac said to quote you directly. You can say whatever you want.

Megan Carter:
Just... say we were involved.

Sarah Wylie:
That's true, isn't it?

Megan Carter:
No. But it's accurate.

– Absence of Malice  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Gloria Russell:
He's got the letter opener. Blood. Fingerprints. Jesus... Think what he can do.

Bill Burton:
The man's a thief. A thief who witnessed a murder.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Allen Richmond:
What do we know, so far?

Gloria Russell:
Well, we've checked his license plates. He stole the car from a police impoundment lot.

Allen Richmond:
We're not dealing with a fool here, are we? Has he initiated contact?

Gloria Russell:
Burton doesn't think he will.

Allen Richmond:
I agree. I apologize for my behavior. It won't happen again. Consider it a blip on the screen. As far as I'm concerned that's all he is, too.

Gloria Russell:
Well, he could be a little more than that, Allen. He saw.

Allen Richmond:
He saw nothing. He saw a drunk woman who liked rough sex too much. He's a burglar. Who's gonna believe him? After all, it's not as if he has any evidence or anything.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Walter Sullivan:
For eighty years, I've tried to live... a decent life. I've given a billion dollars to charity. If this comes to trial... none of that will be remembered. I'll just go out... the joke of the world.

Seth Frank:
I understand, sir. I'll do what I can.

Walter Sullivan:
[chuckles] Will you listen to me whine? I apologize, Mr. Frank. Bother me all you want, just do your job. And I'll try to do mine.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Kate Whitney:
Why'd you come?

Luther Whitney:
I couldn't have my daughter thinking I was a murderer.

Kate Whitney:
No, I mean why did you come to the restaurant this afternoon? You must have suspected something, or else you wouldn't have been prepared.

Luther Whitney:
My daughter wanted to see me.

...

Kate Whitney:
But then you go to the police. That's what innocent people do. They go to the police.

Luther Whitney:
Sure. And that young man who was just here, he'd believe me over the President, wouldn't he?

Kate Whitney:
Well, why should I believe you?

Luther Whitney:
Because I swear to you, Kate. I swear to you on Mattie's grave. Yeah, that's right. Your mother's grave, I'd kill myself before I lied about that.

Kate Whitney:
Oh Jesus, Luther.

Luther Whitney:
Yeah, I know.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Walter Sullivan:
I don't yet know who it is I'm after. Until I do, you'll have to wait in Washington for instructions.

Michael McCarty:
I'm afraid that's out of the question. Mine is not particularly creative work, and I do it only because I enjoy living beyond my means. I can't afford to just sit around.

Walter Sullivan:
My father died when I was nine years old. He was a miner. He died of lung disease. I became rich at twenty-five, and the first thing I did was to buy that mine, close it down, and give every miner fifty thousand dollars to retire on. You *will* wait in Washington, Mr. McCarty. You will choose a penthouse suite, and I will put one million dollars into a Swiss bank of your choosing. And when the time comes... two million dollars a bullet.

Michael McCarty:
...You are a salesman, sir.

Walter Sullivan:
Selling sin is easy.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Gloria Russell:
What do I do?

Bill Burton:
Nothing. Because he's making a terrible mistake. He thinks he has time. He doesn't. Seth Frank's too good. He'll bring him in.

Gloria Russell:
Then what?

Tim Collin:
Then I kill him.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Kate Whitney:
Quit wasting my time. He doesn't want you to find him, you're not gonna find him.

Seth Frank:
You're saying what? He left town, he skipped the country? What?

Kate Whitney:
I'm saying, you won't recognize him. I'm saying, he could be right around the corner.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Collin, disguised as a doctor, tries to kill Kate with an injection; Luther, also disguised as a doctor, comes up behind him and jabs a syringe into his neck]

Luther Whitney:
Dr. Kevorkian, I presume? My guess is this is right in your carotid artery about now. You're gonna get a little woozy. But if I give you the rest of this, it's gonna fry your brain down to the size of a peanut! Drop that.

[Collin drops the syringe, and Luther eases him down to the floor]

Tim Collin:
[whispering] Luther, he's my president, right or wrong.

Luther Whitney:
Well, he made a mistake. *You* made a mistake. When you went after my little girl, that was entirely unacceptable.

Tim Collin:
[pleading weakly] Mercy.

Luther Whitney:
I'm fresh out.

[Luther plunges the injection into Collin's neck; Collin groans as he dies]

Kate Whitney:
[starts waking up in hospital bed] Daddy?

Luther Whitney:
[softly] Go to sleep, darling.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Walter Sullivan:
Are you taking your shortcut, Tommy?

Luther Whitney:
I'm your substitute drive tonight, Mr. Sullivan. Oh don't worry about Tommy; he's just fine.

Walter Sullivan:
It's very unusual. What do I call you?

Luther Whitney:
Luther, sir.

Walter Sullivan:
Are you familiar with to get to my townhouse, Luther?

Luther Whitney:
Oh yes, sir I know where all your houses are. I'm the man who robbed you. And you're the man who tried to kill me.

Walter Sullivan:
I'm sorry I've missed. I believe in the Old Testament, sir. There's nothing wrong for an eye for an eye for when a terrible deed has been done. A deed such as yours.

Luther Whitney:
Which you'd like to believe, wouldn't ya? That'd be simple for you to believe that. What do you think that I have to gain by being here?

Walter Sullivan:
I have no idea. Are you going to rob me again?

Luther Whitney:
Oh I don't need your money, Mr. Sullivan. Now did you check your vault lately? I put everything back.

Walter Sullivan:
I'm afraid we're a little late for an attempt at leniency.

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Luther Whitney:
[about the night when Christy was killed] A lot of crap is coming down tonight, sir. Do you want to be a player, or not? Do you want to know what happened that night, or don't you? Because I was there.

Walter Sullivan:
I want to know.

Luther Whitney:
Do you think you can, stand hearing about it, how he beat her, tried to strangle her, you want to really know about that?

Walter Sullivan:
I could walk through the fire.

Luther Whitney:
Well, I was in the vault when they came in, they were drunk. He started knocking her around, but she fought back, then he started getting really rough, she tried to defend herself, while he started screaming, like the sniveling SIMP HE IS.

Walter Sullivan:
Who else was in my house?

Luther Whitney:
The Secret Service, they're the ones who shot her.

Walter Sullivan:
Nonsense!

Luther Whitney:
And Gloria Russell she handled the cover up.

Walter Sullivan:
STOP THIS!

Luther Whitney:
Don't you want to know who it was?

Walter Sullivan:
IT WAS YOU!

Luther Whitney:
Oh come on Mr. Sullivan, we're too old to bullshit each other.

Walter Sullivan:
WHO WAS IT THEN?

Luther Whitney:
You know? [Mr. Sullivan nods his head] Don't shake your head at me. When you're alone at night, and your rage takes over and you want to avenge her. What face do you put with your enemy?

– Absolute Power  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Aguado stomps on a cockroach.]

Aguado:
Homicide, Ventura. Now how you gonna solve that one?

Ace Ventura:
Good question, Aguado. First, I'd establish a motive. In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's dick and became insanely jealous. Then I'd lose 30 pounds...porking his wife!

Aguado:
Why, you- [tries to attack Ace, but he misses]

Ace:
Come on! [takes him down and holds his face near the dead bug] Now, kiss and make up.

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Ace Ventura:
[using his ass to talk to Emilio] Excuse me! I'd like to ASS you a few questions!

Emilio:
This is not the time, Ace. If Einhorn comes in here and sees me talking to you or your ass, I'm history.

Ace Ventura:
[turns around to face Emilio] I think I can keep him under control, but you're going to have to tell me who's working the Snowflake case.

Emilio:
Hey, I can't do nothing for you on that one. My hands are totally tied.

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Roger Podactor:
Who's he?

Melissa Robinson:
Roger Podactor, meet Ace Ventura. He's our pet detective.

Podactor:
[shakes Ace's hand.] Nice to meet you, you were highly recommended by Martha Metz.

Ace Ventura:
Martha Metz? Oh, yeah, the bitch!

Podactor:
What?

Ventura:
Pekingese, hyperactive, lost in Highland Park area. She was half-dead when I found her. [looks at the tank area] Is that the tank? Excuse me. [walks off with Melissa and Roger standing in disbelief]

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Ace Ventura:
[speaking through his rear opera-style] Assholiomio...Osodomia...Lea-- [sees Lois Einhorn] HOLY...testicle Tuesday!

Lois Einhorn:
What the hell is he doing here?

Ventura:
I came to confess. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll.

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[at the crime scene following Roger Podacter's death]

Ace:
Oh, there is just... one more thing, Lieutenant. This woman is Roger Podacter's neighbor, she lives across the hall. She said she heard a scream, isn't that right Ma'am?

Lady:
Right.

Ace:
(to the manager) And you said you had to open the balcony door when you came into the room?

Man:
That's true.

Ace Ventura:
You're certain you had to open this door?

Man:
Yeah, I'm certain.

Lois Einhorn:
What's the point, Ventura?!

Ventura:
Only this... [walks out to the balcony and begins singing like an opera singer while opening and closing the door; no one can hear him when the door is closed] This is double-paned soundproof glass! There is no way that neighbor could've heard Podacter scream on the way down with that door shut! The scream she heard came from inside this apartment before he was thrown over the balcony, and the murderer closed the door before he left. Yes! Yes! Oh, yeah! Can ya feel that, buddy? Huh?! Huh?! Huh?! [mimics Tangina character from Poltergeist] I have exorcised the demons! This house is clear. Losers?

Einhorn:
[everyone stares in shock] GET HIM OUT OF HERE!

Ventura:
[starts making his way out with Melissa while looking at everyone, holding his fingers like an L] LOSERS! Leh-hew, ze-hers!

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Ronald Camp:
Who is he, a friend?

Melissa Robinson:
No, this is--this is my date. He's a lawyer.

Camp:
Well, does he have a name, or should I call him "lawyer"?

Robinson:
No, this is Ace. Um, Tom Ace.

Ventura:
Tom Ace. Pleasure to meet you Mr. Camp, and congratulations on all your success. You smell terrific. I was just telling Melissa that one of the first things we learned back at Stanford Law was the modern proliferation of food poisoning claims against wealthy private homeowners. In fact, if one were so inclined, one could make quite a lucrative law practice with little else. How is everyone feeling tonight?

Camp:
[nervously] Very, very well, thank you.

Ventura:
[to Melissa] Oh. Look, honey, there's the hors d'oeuvres. [looks suspiciously at Camp]

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Lt. Einhorn is pointing a gun at Ace's head]

Ace Ventura:
[begging] Don't kill me! Please! I'll never tell anyone, I swear... [indicates Marino] He's the one you want! Kill him!

Dan Marino:
No, kill him! He's the detective!

Ventura:
No, kill him! He held the ball wrong, remember?! Come on, look at the guy! [startled at Einhorn shooting into the air]

Marino:
[to Ace] Crybaby.

Ventura:
[to Dan] Jock.

Marino:
Wimp.

Ventura:
Musclehead.

Lois Einhorn:
SHUT UP! I think I'll kill the dolphin first, I wouldn't want you to miss that!

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Einhorn:
Shoot him! SHOOT HIM!

Emilio:
Hold your fire! [Melissa drags Emilio into the area with a gun pointed at him] Don't shoot.

Melissa:
Put your guns down or this cop gets it. I mean it! [cocks gun and puts it under Emilio's chin]

Emilio:
She's not joking!

Einhorn:
HE KIDNAPPED SNOWFLAKE! He killed Roger Podacter, and he was just about to kill Dan Marino and ME!

Ace:
Oh-ho-HO! Fiction can be fun! But I find the reference section much more enlightening. For instance: if you were to look up professional football's all-time bonehead plays...you might read about a Miami Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle, who missed a 26-yard field goal in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XVII. [takes deep breath and begins speaking at a faster clip] What you WOULDN'T read about is how Ray Finkle lost his mind, was committed to a mental hospital, only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker, manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino whom he blamed for the entire thing! [gasps for air]

Aguado:
What the hell are you talking about?

Ace:
[pointing at Einhorn] SHE'S NOT LOIS EINHORN! She's Ray Finkle! She's a man!

Einhorn:
He's lying...SHOOT HIM!

Ace:
[laughs] Let's just see who's lying, shall we? Would a real woman have to wear one of these? [pulls on Einhorn's hair, assuming it's a wig] Boy, that's really on there! But tell me this...would a real woman be missing these? [rips open Einhorn's blouse, revealing her breasts] That kind of surgery can be done over the weekend! But I doubt very much if he could find the time during his... busy schedule...to get rid of big ol' Mr. Knish! [rips Einhorn's skirt off, believing she is hiding a penis, but she appears to have the normal figure of a woman] Heh heh...oh, boy.

Dan Marino:
Psst, Ace...come here.

Ace:
Would you excuse me for just one second? [Ace walks over to Marino, who whispers to him about something that leaves Ace agape] Ladies and gentlemen...my esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. Now, history has certainly shown that even the most intuitive criminal investigator can be wrong from time to time. But if I am mistaken...if the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to be...then, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I HAVE EVER SEEN! [Ace grabs Einhorn and spins her around revealing a huge penis tucked behind her legs, making everyone gasp in shock] THAT'S why Roger Podacter is dead! He found Captain Winky!!

[Everyone in the Miami Dade PD, including Marino and Snowflake reacts in disgust because it means that Finkle/Einhorn had indeed kissed them like she/he did Ace.]

Ace:
Goodnight, everybody! You've been a wonderful audience! I'll be here all week. Be sure to tip your waitress.

[Finkle picks up a piece of glass]

Finkle:
DIE ANIMAL BOY!! [runs at Ace, attempting to kill him]

Ace:
Quick decision. [Ace somersaults Finkle into the water]

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Ace is trying to catch the rare albino pigeon that landed on the Gatorade cooler, when a man playing Swoop chases it away.]

Ace:
IDIOT!

Swoop:
What?!

Ace:
You realize what you just did. You cost me $25,000, Polly!

Swoop:
Yeah? Blow me.

Ace:
Rrreeallly?

– Ace Ventura: Pet Detective  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

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