Wikidude's Quotes Page #79

Here's the list of quotes submitted by wikidude  —  There are currently 140,397 quotes total — keep up the great work!

[Huck is exploring the town of Muscatine.]

Huck:
[to himself] Wow, what a great town. This place has got it all. Friendly town people, shopping, baby with a signal flare... Huh?

[Huck looks and sees that there is, in fact, a baby with a signal flare. Observing further, he sees that everyone in the town has a signal flare. To make matters worse, Huck spots a big "WANTED" billboard for Little Jimmy.]

Huck:
Ahhh! [he backs away from the billboard, only to bump into a policeman] Excuse me. [the policeman turns to Huck, revealing he has a signal flare, too; Huck backs up, and knocks over an n entire cart of signal flares] Oh! Really sorry about that!

[Huck bumps into the old man he met from earlier.]

Huck:
Excuse me.

Old Man:
Hey, is there somethin’ I can help you with, Sonny?

[He adjusts his hat with a signal flare. Huck sees it, screams, and runs away frightened, catching the baby’s attention. Cut to Tom and Little Jimmy on the dock.]

Tom:
You play any football in high school? You got the size for it.

Little Jimmy:
No. I was in musicals.

Tom:
Really?

[Huck comes rushing toward them.]

Huck:
Tom! T-Tom!

[The baby suddenly spots Little Jimmy, and starts crying loudly as he whacks against his carriage.]

Huck:
TOM! Whoa!

[Huck collides with Tom and Little Jimmy, and the three tumble down the stairs back onto the raft. The baby stops fussing and looks at his signal flare.]

Huck:
[grabs the paddle] We gotta get outta here! [pushes the raft away from the dock]

Tom:
W-What are you doing? Huck?!? What’s going on?!

Huck:
BEWARE THE BABIES!

[A signal flare shoots into the sky with a loud whistle and explodes into a firework. The baby laughs. Huck looks up in horror.]

Little Jimmy:
Oooh...pretty.

Tom:
Eh-hehh... eh, maybe no one noticed…

[He was wrong. Everyone else in the town starts firing their signal flares into the sky, making it look like a fireworks show.]

Huck:
[paddling faster] They all know about Jim! The posters are everywhere! Even the babies have signal flares!

Tom:
The babies?

Huck:
Yeah, Tom! The babies!

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Tom:
Who's that guy?

Huck:
I think it was Colonel Sanders.

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Mr. Lunt:
Personally, I found the book riveting, full of flawed characters and classic American humor.

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Confetti the Fox (Scallion #1):
For a thousand gold coins, here is question number three: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Pistachio (Junior):
Huh? I don't know that! Nobody knows that!

Confetti:
Then you shouldn't have risked everything.

[Charlie Pincher pulls a lever that sends Pistachio down the rollercoaster, and onto the catapult.]

Pistachio:
But... But you said you wouldn't steer me wrong!

Confetti:
No. We said "Why would we steer you wrong?", and the answer is... Five. Gold. Coins.

[Charlie pushes the lever that makes the catapult fling Pistachio into the ocean.]

Pistachio:
[screams]

Confetti, Purina the Cat (Scallion #2), and Charlie:
[laugh]

Purina:
High five!

Confetti:
No hands, numbskull.

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Carrot:
Oh, hey there, cricket!

Khalil:
I am not a cricket! I am a caterpillar!

Carrot:
Silly cricket.

Pistachio:
Huh? Cricket!?

Khalil:
I am not a- Pistachio! You are alive!

Pistachio:
I'm looking for Gelato!

Khalil:
Me too! That's why I left home by myself in this big, mean caterpillar-eating world!

Pistachio:
I don't eat caterpillars.

Khalil:
Good. I hear we are quite tasty.

Pistachio:
Who's with the ducklings?

Khalil:
Oh. A good friend is helping me out.

[Madame Blueberry is looking after the ducklings.]

Madame Blueberry:
No, I'm a blueberry. But I get that all the time.

Duckling:
Quack?

Madame Blueberry:
No, I never played Monopoly, but I'll give it a go.

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Pistachio:
Where's all the food?

Gelato (Larry):
Oh, we've got plenty of food!

Dorito:
Hey, guys? We're out of food.

[pause]

Espresso:
WE'RE GONNA DIE!

[Everyone screams and panics.]

Khalil:
WE'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!

VeggieTales  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Marius:
You racist bastard. You think all Romis from Romania. Is not. Romi many places. Bulgaria, Poland, Spain. Romani different language, like... Welsh to English. You speaking fucking Welsh?

Becky:
Yeah, I do, actually.

Marius:
Doesn't matter.

Becky:
But...

Marius:
You still racist.

Utopia, Season 2  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Marius:
What's going on?

Grant:
Becky found a way to speak to Anton. Through twatface.

Marius:
Is twatface me?

Utopia, Season 2  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Becky:
Ian, what are you doing?

Ian:
I'm getting Grant back.

Becky:
What? Are you trying to find a weapon? Is that it?

Ian:
Right.

Becky:
Well, that's a curtain pole, Ian. You've got a curtain pole.

Utopia, Season 2  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Abortion protester:
Think of the innocent children!

Amy:
Oh, you want me to think about the children, you hog-fingering fucks? Well, guess what? I did think about this. I considered it, and I cried, and, yeah, suck my cock, I even prayed a little. And here I am. So you can back the fuck off, you hypocritical cunts, before I show up to the piss puddle that is your house and protest your husband whacking it to your daughter's seventh grade yearbook! That sign's misspelled.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Catherine:
This is a pretty good turnout for a dog funeral. Even the governor's here. Who are all these people?

Richard:
Novelty mayors are Iowa's number one form of tourism, after tornado chasing and coming into town to buy Sudafed.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Selina:
God bless America for hating women almost as much as I do!

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Kent:
"Man Up" continues to resonate in all four quadrants.

Selina:
It's universal: Men hate women, women hate themselves.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Dan:
Ma'am, the new anti-Kemi ad pieces came in. [hands her the ad]

Selina:
What the tragic mulatto fuck! Kemi looks like an albino, and I'm so black people are gonna start calling me "articulate".

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Marjorie:
[about Richard] I've never been more proud that I taught that man to ejaculate into a cup.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Selina:
So, how's the turnout?

Ben:
Well, much like my prostate, mostly black and much larger than we'd like.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Ben:
Ma'am, I warned you, you cannot trust the Chinese. I've married enough of them to know that.

Selina:
Isn't your wife Korean?

Ben:
Maybe. Fog of war.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Selina:
Okay Gary, you need to spend every dime in the space-based...

Kent:
Faith-based.

Selina:
Mmm-hmm. On religious shit, ASAP.

Gary:
I don't know how to do that. I don't even know how it got in there.

Selina:
Just give it to one of those gay-converting Baptist colleges to fund a statue of a gold-plated Jesus fucking a Triceratops.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Amy:
Your particular brand of crazy is polling very high here in Florida, especially with melanoma-ravaged swamp fuckers, storm-ravaged climate deniers, and deadbeat dads... and deadbeat moms.

Jonah:
Those are my peeps.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Furlong:
Well, we gotta go. Will's got a full day ahead of him. Tell 'em what you gotta do, Will.

Will:
Well, I was hoping to finally finish my passion project.

Furlong:
Which is?

Will:
Rerouting my urethra to behind my balls so that I have to sit to pee, like a real girl.

Furlong:
Ha!

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Kent:
It's basically a two-woman race to see who is less offensive to the American people.

Selina:
That's the best explanation of democracy I've ever heard.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Selina:
My Nobel Prize really makes the point that I've got way more foreign policy experience than that half-wit Kemi.

Ben:
I think it's pronounced half-white.

Selina:
Eh, tomato, mulatto.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Amy:
Jonah, your anti-vaccination message is bringing together an unheard of mix of Orthodox Jews, uneducated conspiracists and Kombucha-douching private school moms.

Jonah:
That's the real America.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

Dan:
We gotta get the morbidly obese fuck out of Iowa. I mean, last night, I tried to find one non-chain restaurant to eat at, and Yelp basically told me to go Fuddrucker myself.

Veep, Season 7  Show Quote

added 7 months ago

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