Tulio:
Miguel and Tulio!
Miguel:
Tulio and Miguel! Mighty and powerful...
Together:
Gods!
Chel:
Hello.
[both yell out; Chel bursts out laughing]
Tulio:
Depart, mortal, before we strike you with a lightning bolt!
[Chel hums calmly]
Miguel:
Beware the wrath of the gods! Begone! [mimics lightning bolt] Ck-ck!
Chel:
[smiling] Save it for the High Priest, honey. You're gonna need it.
Miguel:
Ck-ck!
Tulio:
Miguel, it's not working.
Miguel:
Ck-ck!
Tulio:
Miguel! We've been caught.
Miguel:
Ck-ck...
Chel:
Oh, no. Don't worry about me. "My only wish is to serve the gods." Remember?
Tulio:
How?
Chel:
Well, you guys both want the gold and you don't want to get caught, right? You're gonna need help.
Miguel:
What makes you think we need your help?
Chel:
[mimics Miguel's lightning sound] "Ck-ck!" Are you serious?
[Altivo laughs in a neigh]
[Miguel and Tulio stammer in disbelief]
Chel:
Okay. So, uh, who are you?
Tulio:
Yeah, uh, what's your angle?
Chel:
[chuckles] No angle. I want in.
Tulio:
In?
Chel:
On the scam.
Tulio:
[chuckles nervously] There's no scam. Why would you think there's a s--? [suddenly serious] Why?
Chel:
[chuckles] So I can get out.
Miguel:
I thought she just said she wanted in?
Tulio:
She wants in so she can get out.
Miguel:
Aha! Got it. [confused] Why?
Chel:
Think you're the only ones who dream of better things? Of adventure? You've got your reasons, and I've got mine. Let's not make it personal, okay? It's just business.
Miguel and Tulio:
Oh.
Chel:
[puts both her arms around Miguel and Tulio] So, when you guys are ready to go back to wherever you came from, I'm going with you.
Tulio:
[bursts out laughing and gently removes Chel's hand from behind his neck] No! Don't think so.
[Miguel coughs and whistles]
Chel:
All right. Fine. [chuckles and hits Miguel and Tulio's chests as she passes them] After all, I'm sure you know the proper rituals for blessing a tribute, the holiest days on the calendar, oh, and of course you know all about Xibalba. [pinches Tulio's cheek and giggles] Okay? Good luck. [Tulio rubs his cheek] See you at the execution.
Tulio:
[sputters] Wait! Ho-- Would you-- Hold it.
Chel:
[chuckles] Deal?
Tulio:
Hmm.
Miguel:
[stretches hand out] Deal.
Tulio:
[pull Miguel's hand away] Not yet. Let's just see how this works out.
Chel:
Uh-huh. Well, then, I suppose that means you'll want these back? [produces Tulio's dice in her hand]
Tulio:
[pats his vest pocket, shocked] How'd you get those? [snatches them back from Chel and replaces them in his vest pocket]
Miguel:
[raising eyebrows] Where was she keeping them?
Chel:
Call me, Chel, your new partner.
Tulio:
Uh, that's partner-in-training.
Chel:
Now, put these on. Your public's waiting.
Tulio:
[he and Miguel are about to undress, but Tulio stops.] Do you mind?
Chel:
[not realizing what Tulio meant.] No. [suddenly, she gets the idea.] Oh! Oh! Oh! Right. Uh, excuse me. [Miguel struggles to take his shoe of.] Bye.
Miguel:
Mm-mm-mmm! Maybe they should call this place "Chel Dorado."
Tulio:
[distracted] She's whoo-- [breaks distraction] Whoa, she's trouble! Wait a minute!
Miguel:
What?
Tulio:
The little voice? Remember the little voice? Well, just for a second, imagine that you have one. What would it be saying about Chel?
Miguel:
Hmmmmm... [purrs]
Tulio:
No. No. Listen. We are partners.
Miguel:
We're partners.
Tulio:
We have a plan, remember?
Miguel:
Get the gold, go back to Spain.
Tulio:
Yes. And we are pretending to be Gods now. Put Chel in the mix. What is the voice saying? Listen carefully.
Miguel:
[hesitantly] Chel is...off-limits, hmm?
[game show bell dings]
Tulio:
Bravo! Chel is off-limits! Shake on it. [he and Miguel do a secret handshake.] Off-limits.
Miguel:
Besides, we're supposed to be Gods. We must avoid giving in to temptation.
Tulio:
Gods. [cloth falls down, but Tulio catches it and ties it back up again.] Oh. [embarrassed] This is gonna be tougher than I thought.
Miguel:
Tulio, relax. All you have to do is smile, act Godly and follow my lead.
