Wikidude's Quotes Page #5,605

Here's the list of quotes submitted by wikidude — There are currently 140,397 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Diego: Raise your hand if you just saw some titties [Mark, Largeman and Sam raise their hands tentatively] Diego: Ok. Now everybody calm the fuck down! – Garden State Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Mark's Mom: Don't be shy, Tim, tell them what you said to me last night. Tim: No... Mark: Tell us what you said to her last night! Tim: [In Klingon] Kiteeki maru, al fooksu. Mark: You have got to be kidding me. Mark's Mom: It means "I like to mate after battle." Tim: That isn't what I said. Mark's Mom: Yeah... Tim: NO, that isn't the one I said! This one means "Kill Kirk".... and also, "hallelujah", depending on the context... – Garden State Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Largeman: Oh, you mean Gymnastics Tina? How did she do it? Mark: I don't know. She isn't Jewish, I didn't bury her. Karl Benson: I think it was painkillers. Or that car in the garage thing. – Garden State Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Paul: How can they not do anything? Don't they care? Jack: I think that when people turn on their TVs and see this footage, they'll say, "Oh my God, that's horrible," and then they'll go back to eating their dinners. – Hotel Rwanda Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Paul: You know, I admire you general. How do you keep calm of your men in such madness? General Bizimungu: I am a strong man Paul. Paul: I wish I were more like you. I mean look at my staff (pointing at Gregoire flirting with a woman) he won't work, listens to no one. General Bizimungu: (Sees Gregoire) He is staff? Paul: Oh yes. General Bizimungu: (Walks over to Gregoire and throws ice bucket on to him) Get back to work you slob! (Hitting Gregoire) Go! – Hotel Rwanda Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Colonel Oliver: You should spit in my face. Paul: Excuse me, Colonel? Colonel Oliver: You’re dirt. We think you’re dirt, Paul. Paul: Who is we? Colonel Oliver: The West. All the super powers. Everything you believe in, Paul. They think you’re dirt. They think you’re dung. You’re worthless! Paul: I am afraid I don't understand what you are saying. Colonel Oliver: Oh, come on, don't bullshit me, Paul. You're the smartest man here. You got 'em all eating out of your hands. You could own this frigging hotel, except for one thing: you're black. You're not even a nigger. You're an African. They’re not gonna stay, Paul. They’re not gonna stop this slaughter. – Hotel Rwanda Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Paul: You have no whiskey? George: No whiskey, no spirits. Your rich guests will have to do without their scotch. Anyway, Paul, I have bled that cow enough now. Paul: What are you saying, George? George: Your rich cockroaches at the hotel... their money is no good to them anymore. Soon, all of the Tutsis will be dead. Paul: You do not honestly believe that you can kill them all. George: And why not? Why not? We are halfway there already. Oh, and Paul, I will give you a crate of soft drinks for the kids. No charge. [To his men] Ten bags of beans! Come! Put those in the van, you! [To Paul] Let me give you a tip my friend, our generals in the army say 'do not go near the Mille Collines or they will send the Belgian soldiers back here'. But soon, those generals will have gone, and we will be in charge. It is time to butcher your cow for the meat. [Pauses] Maybe you can help us Paul. You have some very important traitors at your hotel. Now, if we were to get them, then maybe we could let you have one of two cockroaches of your own. You understand? Paul: It is almost dawn, George. We really must be going. George: Take the river road back. It's clear. – Hotel Rwanda Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
General Bizimungu: I lead no massacres! Paul: Do you think they will believe you? General Bizimungu: You will tell them the truth! Paul: I will tell them nothing unless you help me! (sees General Bizimungu attempting to pull out his handgun) What are you going to do, shoot me? Shoot me. Please, shoot me. It would be a blessing, I will pay you to shoot my family. You cannot hurt me. – Hotel Rwanda Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Dracula is at the door do Mavis' bedroom] Shrunken head: Oh, it's you. Glad you could make it. Count Dracula: Is she up yet? Shrunken head: Oh, she's up. She's ready to go. And by "go", I mean go. As in, go check the world out. What you gonna do? What you gonna say? Count "Drac" Dracula: I got it covered. Please, relax. Just do your job. [opens the door] Good morning, Mavey-Wavey! Happy Birthday, my little mouse! Mavis Dracula: [deadpan] Thank you, Dad. I know it's my birthday. Dracula: I have so much fun planned! Whoo-hoo! But first, we go catch some scorpions together, just the 2 of us, yes, Dead-ums? Mavis: Dad, please let me speak. There's something we have to talk about. Drac(ula): You want to go out into the world. You can. Mavis: Aha! I knew you were gonna say that. But, Dad, you gave me your word, you know that I know that a Dracula's word is sacred. That our trust is the core of our… Wait, what? Drac: I said you can go. Mavis: You're just playing with me. Drac: No, no, no, no. You're old enough to drive a hearse now, you're old enough to make your own choices. You can go. Mavis: Holy rabies, holy rabies! [hugs him, then rushes to the closet and packs her suitcase, turns into bat form and starts to fly out the window] Drac: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop. Wait a second, sweet fangs. Where are you going? Mavis: Oh, well, I'm going to paradise, and this is just some stuff that I thought I would need. Drac: Paradise? Mavis: [turns back into human form] Yeah, you know. It's the place out there where you and Mom met. Auntie Wanda says you 2 were just like, Zing! Drac: I don't know from Zing. Where did you find that card? Mavis: In one of your drawers. Why won't you ever tell me about how you (and Mom) met? Drac: It's actually Hawaii. Mavis: [confused] Ha-what-what? Drac: (I'll tell you later.) Look, honey. I know your excited, but everyone has gone to great lengths to come see you on your birthday. Mavis: I know. They always do. [turns back into a bat] Aren't I getting a little old for those parties? I love them, but I really want to see new things. Maybe meet somebody my age. [begins to pout] Drac: Come on. No, no, don't do that. Don't give me the pouty-bat face. Okay, there is a human village just a little ways past the cemetery. You could go there and be back in, like 30 minutes or so. It should be plenty for your first time. Mavis: [sighs] Well, it's not Ha-wee-wee, but I guess it's still technically out there. Okay, okay, okay! [flies back in the window and turns back into human form and hugs her dad] Thanks for trusting me. Drac: Of course, little one. I gave you my word. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Drac: Deviled lizard fingers!? I asked for spleens-in-blankets! Quasimodo: You ugly fool! I told you! He doesn't like the lizard fingers! Gargoyle Waiter: But you said... [Quasimodo slams the plate on top of his head] Jonathan: [sees Skeleton Wife and approaches her] Whoa! Check that costume out! Wow, seriously, I just have to ask - how are you pulling this off? I mean, it looks so real, like I– [reaches his hand through her chest] I could just reach my hand through and... [Skeleton Wife shrieks and slaps him] Skeleton Husband: [appears; angrily to Johnny] What do you think you're doing?! Johnny: [frightened with realization] Uh-- She's... She's real! You're real! Skeleton Husband: Yeah, and I'll give you a real beating! Keep your hands outta my wife! [shoves Johnny and he bumps into Big Foot, then he looks up to see his face and starts shrieking] Drac: [hears Johnny screaming and turns to see he's not behind him anymore] Oh, no! [heads out to find him] Johnny: [realizes the monsters around him are real; hysterically] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Johnny crashes into Mavis, then they look into each other's eyes and they feel a zing… but Drac gets in the way.] Drac: [concerned] Mavis, honey, are you alright? Mavis: [dazed] Yeah, I think so. That was weird… Johnny: [groaning] Oh, my head hurts… Mavis: [curious] Um, who is that? Drac: [nervous] Who is what? Oh! Oh, that? That is, uh… nobody. Mavis: [deadpan] Seriously, Dad? Johnny: [surprised] "Dad"!? Mavis: Yeah, I know. Dracula's daughter. Everybody freaks out at first. Johnny: [hysterical] Dracula!? Drac: Okay, we gotta go. [quickly takes Johnny away, leaving Mavis completely suspicious. Drac opens the door to his bedroom] Johnny: [screams in horror] Please, don't kill me! I'm so young! I have so many places I want to see! I've got tickets to 6 Dave Matthews Band concerts! I'm getting out of here! [opens the cellar door and a monster from off screen roars at Johnny potentially to make him scream and forcing him to go back up] Drac: [to Johnny] Shut up, already. It's impossible for me to think with all your noise. [opens the cellar door] Sorry, Glen! Go back to sleep! [closes in and Glen roars down the bottom in reply] – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Drac, in bat form, is carrying Johnny and heads out the window] Johnny: If I put my hand in the Invisible Man's mouth, would it disappear? Mavis: [suddenly appears] Hi! Drac: [surprised] Mavey! Wh-what are you doing, my sweet little blood orange? Our friend was just leaving. Johnny: Yeah, he was flying me out the window. Drac: [nervously laughs, then takes Johnny back inside] This guy is so funny. [turns into human and moves Johnny away from the window] Oh, look there's something on your face. [to Johnny, in a soft tense tone] Play along if you ever want to see your precious backpack. [Mavis flies in through the window and turns back into her human form] Johnny: [amazed] Whoa. So, wait, you didn't have any clothes on when you were a bat or were they bat-sized? Mavis: [looking slightly freaked out] Who exactly is that? Drac: [whimpers while thinking of a lie, then...] Honey bat, you see... it's your birthday, and you know, I want you to have the bestest, specialest party of your life, so… well… I... needed some help. Mavis: You needed help? Drac: Well, look, I am pretty good, but I thought that it would be even more bestest, specialest if someone closer to your age helped plan the party. Mavis: [excited, to Johnny] You're my age? Johnny: Sure! Uh, well, how old are you? Mavis: 118. Johnny: [hysterical] 100 and–!? [Drac elbows him] Ugh! [strained] Yeah, uh… I'm 121. Mavis: [excited] Really? Johnny: [nods] Mmm-hmmm. Drac: [to Mavis] You see? Everything is very, very normal. I'm throwing a party and he is helping. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Johnny: So, can I ask you a question? Is that real, about the garlic thing? Drac: Yes, I cannot have it. My throat swells. Johnny: Huh. Wooden stake to the heart? Drac: Yeah, well, who wouldn't that kill? – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Drac and Johnny are in the catacombs, and Dracula sees another door] Drac: Oh, boy. I think this is it. [opens the door and it shows the Skeleton Wife having a shower] Skeleton Wife: [notices them] Ahhh! What happening? Drac: [gasps] I'm terribly sorry! Uh, my mistake! Skeleton Husband: [bursts in] What is wrong with you people?! [throws a loofah at Dracula and closes the door] [Drac and Johnny are still walking in the catacombs trying to find a way out] Johnny: Oh, man, this place is amazing! Drac: Okay, I could really use some silence right now. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Frankenstein's Monster: Drac. Drac: Yes, Frankie? Frankenstein: Hey, buddy, what you been doing? Drac: [to Johnny] Don't move. [to Frankenstein] Never mind that. What you been doing? Wayne: We wanted to practice our big number for Mavis' party, and then these losers wouldn't get off the bandstand. Drac: Okay. Put down Zombie Mozart, Bach and Beethoven this instant. [Frank and Wayne throw them] Did you get to rehearse at all, Zombie Beethoven? Zombie Beethoven: Eh eh eh eh. Wayne: Listen, Drac, we wanted to play something, like old times. We even thought maybe you'd sing with us. Drac: Come on, fellas. You know that I haven't sung in public since Martha… Frankenstein: Yeah, but we just thought how much, you know, Mavis would love it. Drac: I said, no! [roars with his monster face] Don't ask me again! Okay. Now, let's hug the zombies. Let's all make up. Wayne: [to Frank] Wow, he really scared you. Frank(ie): I wasn't scared. I was being polite, okay? – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Frank spots Johnny and threateningly advances toward him, and Drac gets in his way] Frankie: [points at Johnny] Who is that? Johnny: [whispering to Drac] Are these monsters gonna kill me? Drac: [whispering to Johnny] Not as long as they think you're a monster. Johnny: Huh? That's kinda racist. Drac: We'll talk later. [Johnny is imitating Frank] Frank: [to Drac about Johnny] Is… is he making fun of me? Drac: No, no! Of course not, because he's... [stops Johnny from imitating] Mavis: He's your cousin, Johnny-stein. Drac: [playing along] Yes, yes, yes! Frank: I don't have no cousin. Drac: No, no, you do. He's your 6th cousin, 3 times removed. Johnny-stein: [holds up his right arm] On your right arm's side. Frank: [to his right arm] You have a cousin? Drac: Frank, if your arm can talk, it would tell you that the original owner of your arm had a brother... Johnny-stein: ...Who married a woman... Drac: ...Who was... [makes killing gesture] Johnny-stein: ...For strangling a pig. Frank: I have pig strangling blood in my arm!? That's kinda cool. [to Johnny] Well, Cuz, great to meetcha. [shakes Johnny's hand, but his whole body's shaken multiple times hitting the floor] [Mavis giggles] Griffin: [approaches] So, what brings you here, Johnny? Johnny: [frightened] Ahh! What was that?! (Oh, you're the Invisible Man, right?) Griffin: Oh, sorry. I should really clear my throat before I speak. (And yes, I am, but... call me "Griffin".) Anyway, what brings you here? Johnny: [nervous] Oh, uh... Party Planner? Drac: [playing along] Yes! I've recruited Mister, uh... Stein here to help me with Mavis' birthday party. Murray: Wait a minute. You asked someone to help you? Wayne: Captain Control Freak? Drac: It's "Count"… and yes, I thought having a Mavis contemporary would be useful. Johnny: Yeah, he totally needed a fresher perspective. [Dracula glares at him] Wayne: Okay, Johnny. Mr. Tight Coffin over here was planning to have these powdered lame-o's play at the party. [Zombies sigh] Frank: So, anyways, we thought we could liven things up a bit. Johnny: Whoa! You all play? Let's check you guys out! [Murray and Frank are singing] Frank: [singing] Girl, I can't believe it's your big night [Griffin is playing the drums] Murray: [singing] Seems like only yesterday, you were eating mosquitos All: [singing] But now your eating frogs and mice Frank: [singing] Scarfing them down like Doritos All: [singing] Tell me, where did the time go, girl? Johnny: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on, guys. Stop. That's cute, but kinda old school. Drac: Yes, thank you, Johnny. Johnny: You got to totally tempo things up. Here let me show you. Werewolf man, give me a jam! [Wayne gives him a "jam".] 2, 3, 4! [singing] Vampire girl with the fangy fangs Hair real cute with the bangy bangs Little princess gonna be a queen Legal bat lady turning 118, say 118! Audience: 118! Johnny: Yeah! Stage dive! [stage dives to the floor] Awesome! Mavis: I'm so blown away right now! Frank: I think my cuz is gonna make this the best party ever! Murray: Yeah! Maybe he can find a way to get me some chicks. Audience: We should do a dance contest. Drac: We're not doing any of that! We've got to stay on schedule, alright? Mavis: [to her dad] Alright, Dad! Alright. Johnny, you're coming, too? Johnny: I don't know. Is it cool with Dracula? All: Johnny, come with us. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Skeleton: N-27. Old Gremlin: N-27. Skeleton: G-61. Old Gremlin: G-61. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Drac just forced Johnny to leave and then he disappears] Johnny: I can't believe I'm leaving, man. I could've been so great! Dude, you ruined everything! Suck my blood? Should've said, "I'm staying, old man!" Give him a Bruce Lee kick. Boom! Right in the f-- [a bat appears and he wails] AH! Oh, my God! Count Dracula, please, don't kill me! I'm leaving, I'm leaving! [looks up and the bat turned out to be Mavis, who is now in human form] Oh. Mavis: [softly] Follow me. Johnny: Oh... No, no. Mavis, I can't. I have to leave. Mavis: You sure? It'll be fun. Johnny: [quickly] Okay. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Drac: [to Johnny] Face the wall. [to the tables] 17 to 48, 16 to 47, 19 to 50. Johnny: Awesomeness. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Drac and his friends are relaxing in the sauna talking to each other] Wayne: When's that Johnny kid gonna be done party planning? He's a great hang. Frank: Yeah, he's an animal, and it was so nice seeing Mavis laughing and hitting it off with him. Drac: [in denial] Who's hitting what off? Please! Mavis could never be with... someone of his kind. Frank: I'm sorry. "His kind"? Are you saying our kind's not good enough for you, "your lordship"? Drac: No, no, no! Frank, I didn't... I meant that she wouldn't be into someone with... uh... such, red, curly hair. Griffin: [insulted] Uh... What's wrong with red, curly hair? Drac: Why are you getting upset? Griffin: [angrily] I have red, curly hair! Drac: Well, how was I supposed to know that?! [in a later scene; nervous] Look, settle down, fellas. This is all a moot point, because Johnny... He left. Murray: [surprised] Wait a minute, he left? Drac: Yes! He decided he didn't like Mavis, or any of us. Johnny: [falls through the roof after having a romantic scene with Mavis, and lands on Drac's lap; Drac is scared at first, then gives him an angry glare; smiles nervously] Hi… Frank: Hmm. I guess Johnny had second thoughts. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
[Wayne, Wanda, and the werewolf kids are asleep in their room. Wanda is sleeping soundly, while Wayne is just lying there with bloodshot eyes. He is surrounded by his children, who prevent him from getting proper rest by sleeping on top of him. Wayne starts to close his eyes slowly. Suddenly, the skull phone on the nightstand starts screaming, acting as an alarm. Wayne's bloodshot eyes open instantly. The werewolf kids howl and fall off of Wayne as he sits up to answer the phone] Wayne: I didn't order a wake-up call. Woman on the phone: Count Dracula arranged it for all the rooms. Wayne: [hangs up and drowsily lays to his side, but the phone starts screaming once again; as he keeps lifting and putting the phone on and off the hook] Where's the snooze button?! Skull phone: There will be no snoozing. The party is today. [continues screaming] [Wayne clenches his ears.] – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Johnny: [to Mavis, who's approaching him closely so she could kiss him] Um, Mavis, I'm crazily scared right now. Mavis: [lovingly] Maybe that's a good thing. [kisses him] [A suit of armor alerts Drac to Mavis kissing Johnny, and he is enraged; then quickly separates them] Drac: [whispering to Johnny] How could you, after I shared my pain with you!? Johnny: [frightened] But-- No-- Mavis: Dad, it was just a kiss. Drac: No, you're not allowed to kiss! Mavis: Dad, I'm allowed to do things. I'm not 83 anymore. I'm allowed to like people or go see the world again. Drac: What?! You saw it! You-you said you didn't like it! Mavis: Maybe I want to give the village another chance. I need to learn, you know, how to roll with it like Johnny does. Dracu: No, no, you can't go to the village again! Mavis: Maybe you can make them see that we can be friends. Drac: No, that isn't possible! Mavis: Well, you can't be sure. It's all in how you present yourself! Drac: No, that won't make a difference! Mavis: How do you know?! Drac: Because it just won't! Mavis: Why?! Why won't it?! Drac: BECAUSE THAT VILLAGE DOESN'T REALLY EXIST! (OKAY?!) [the music stops, and Mavis and the other monsters are now in a state of shock; a string on Frank's guitar breaks] Mavis: What do you mean... it doesn't exist? Frank: [he and the others approach Drac] What did you do? Drac: I– [defiantly] I did what I had to do. Mavis: [demanding] What was it? What exactly did you have to do?! Tell me! Drac: I… I built the town, the staff put it all together, the... the zombies dressed up as the townspeople. Zombies: [grunting] Uh-oh. [Mavis heart-brokenly wanders] Drac: [follows her] Please, i-if you really went out there and something happened to you, I... I just couldn't live with myself! Mavis: But you could live with this - lying to me, tricking me, keeping me here forever when you knew my dream was to go? [Drac opens his mouth to say something, but a muffled noise is heard] Quasi: [enters the ballroom] Liar, liar! [Drac make an "Uh-oh" face and Johnny sneaks out] Murray: Oil? Quasi: Uh-uh-uh! [muffled speech... translation - "Dracula has brought a human into the hotel!"] Eunice: English please. Your voice is really annoying. Fly: Wait, I speak frozen. He says Dracula has brought a human into the hotel. [The crowd gasps] Gremlin Wife: A human? Gremlin Husband: [hugs her] Stay close, Pookie. [Quasi has another muffled speech; translation - "There is ze human!"] Fly: He says "There is ze human!". He has a French accent. [Johnny starts to walk out the doors, but they shut and he sees Esmeralda growling like a dog in front of him. Johnny, Dracula and the monsters gasp.] Frank: Johnny's not a human, he's my right arm's cousin. [glares at Quasi] He's lying! Griffin: Yeah, and why is he picking his nose? [Quasi has another muffled speech; translation - "A long story."] Fly: He says it's a long story. Johnny: [to Esmeralda, who's running amok in his face and hair] Hey! Wait! No! Get off me! Ah! Ew! [Esmeralda squeaks, as she wipes away Johnny's make-up, completely blowing his cover.] (Oh, boy…) [Quasimodo has another muffled speech; translation - "Behold ze human!"] Fly: He says "Behold ze human!". [The entire crowd screams and runs in panic] Frank: [horrified] I don't believe it. [Among the panicking monsters, Mavis walks closer to Johnny, as he gives a worried and regretful expression] Mavis: Is it true? Are you a human? Johnny: [guilty] Yes… I'm so sorry… Mavis: [hugs him lovingly] I don't care! I still want to be with you. Jonathan: (Really?) [sighs in relief and wants to hug her back until he sees Drac looking really worried, and he remembers what he told him earlier] Uh... Well, tough! 'Cause I don't want to be with you, because... you're a monster! [Mavis gasps] And I hate monsters! [heads to the door] Goodbye! [as he leaves, he scares Murray by trying to give him a Bruce Lee kick] Murray: Please, don't hurt me! [Johnny gives Mavis one last stare of hatred and heartbreak and heads out the door. Drac tries to comfort the heartbroken Mavis, but she angrily wheels around and faces him.] Mavis: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! [turns into a bat and flees the room, leaving Drac to feel bad about her] [The other monsters, also angry with Drac for his lies, leave the room as well.] Monster 1: We're getting outta here! Monster 2: I am never coming back here! Monster 3: "Human-free"!? What a rip! Monster 4: I thought I smelt a human. Monster 5: Oh, yeah, ice machine? Also broken! – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Martha: [voice-over] Two lonely bats crashed in the night… They felt a Zing, love at first sight. They knew right then, they would be husband and wife. For a Zing only happens once in your life. Your Zing will come, my love… Cherish it. Love, Mommy. Mavis: [still heartbroken and in tears after Johnny left] I thought we zinged, Dad. Drac: [surprised] You and Johnny? Mavis: I guess it was only me, but you should be happy, Dad. There's no reason for me to leave. I have no more dreams. I'm just like you now. – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago
Drac: I think... they zinged. Wayne and Wanda: They zinged!? Drac: But I got in the way. Frank: You only zing once in your life. [begins to cry] Eunice: Oy. Now, you're short-circuiting. Frank: [sobbing] I don't care! – Hotel Transylvania Movie Quote	added 5 years ago

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