Enterprise

Captain Archer:
Take your Vulcan cynicism and bury it with your repressed emotions.

Captain Archer:
Am I sensing concern? Last I checked, that was considered an emotion.

[about phase pistols]

Lt. Reed:
They have two settings: stun and kill... It'd be best not to confuse them.

Commander Tucker:
[after being cursed at by a Klingon and not understanding him] Well I don't particularly like the way YOU smell, either.

Captain Archer:
[after using a "phase pistol" for the first time] Well, I guess stun works.

Captain Archer:
What's the matter? No genetic tricks to keep you from getting knocked on your butt?

[Eating a piece of cheese while talking to his dog, Porthos]

Captain Archer:
You know that you and cheddar don't get along.

Commander Tucker:
You aren't saying much tonight. Don't tell me you're still upset about me and Amanda.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm not upset.

Commander Tucker:
Sure sounds like it.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You're mistaken.

Commander Tucker:
Why would a few neuropressure sessions between me and a MACO be such a big deal. Unless...

Subcommander T'Pol:
Unless what?

Commander Tucker:
Unless you're a little jealous.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I don't experience jealousy.

Commander Tucker:
You're doing a pretty fair imitation of it.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I am not, in any way, jealous of you and Corporal Cole.

Commander Tucker:
You know, your voice is tensing up. That's a dead giveaway.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I didn't know you were an expert in vocal inflections.

Commander Tucker:
I don't need to be an expert to read you. Come on, admit it. You're a little jealous.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Are you implying that I'm attracted to you?

Commander Tucker:
That kind of goes along with the assumption, doesn't it?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Is there something else?

Commander Tucker:
You and Trip used to spend a lot of time here together.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I was instructing him in the practice of Vulcan neuropressure.

Commander Tucker:
I remember. We were lying right there [points to floor] working the neural nodes on each other's feet, talking about the warp engines. How I was hoping to modify them.

Subcommander T'Pol:
How Commander Tucker was hoping to modify them.

Commander Tucker:
[dejected] Right, Commander Tucker. [pause] You know, he was really starting to enjoy those sessions with you.

Subcommander T'Pol:
They were helping him sleep.

Commander Tucker:
[voice getting quieter] I'm not sure that's the only reason.

Subcommander T'Pol:
What do you mean?

Commander Tucker:
Was there ever anything between you and Trip?

Subcommander T'Pol:
If you are referring to a romantic relationship... no.

Commander Tucker:
The reason I ask is... well... you're all I think about, if you know what I mean. And, I'm not talking about an adolescent crush. That was... well, that was two days ago. This is much more serious, the way I feel about you. Anyway, what's driving me crazy is, I don't know if these feelings are mine... or his.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[voice cracking] I can't answer that.

Commander Tucker:
I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm not uncomfortable.

Commander Tucker:
I just thought I should tell you this, while I still had the chance.

Subcommander T'Pol:
May I come in? [Sim nods OK] I just wanted to say how much your absence will affect the crew... how much it will affect me.

Commander Tucker:
I appreciate that. All in all, I guess I've a pretty good life... [T'Pol steps forward and gives him a short but sweet kiss] I couldn't have asked for a better going away present.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I think you're mistaken about who's attracted to whom.

Commander Tucker:
Are you saying I'm attracted to you?

Subcommander T'Pol:
I don't need to say it, you already have.

Commander Tucker:
I don't remember that conversation.

Subcommander T'Pol:
It wasn't you, it was your clone, Sim told me.

Commander Tucker:
Sim?

Subcommander T'Pol:
He said he had feelings for me.

Commander Tucker:
He told you that?

Subcommander T'Pol:
[nodding towards the spot where Sim had stood] Standing right there.

Commander Tucker:
What the hell was he doing in your room?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Your voice is tensing up.

Commander Tucker:
Now you're the vocal expert?

Subcommander T'Pol:
I don't need to be an expert to read you.

Commander Tucker:
I can't believe this. I'm... I'm jealous of... myself?

Subcommander T'Pol:
You're jealous?

Commander Tucker:
No. Absolutely not. Okay, maybe, maybe I am a little.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Which would mean you're attracted to me. [Trip gives her a look] It goes with the assumption.

Commander Tucker:
What just happened here? Did we? Are we? [T'Pol leans in and kisses Trip strongly]

Subcommander T'Pol:
[to a Orion slave owner trying to recapture her] I'm not for sale!

[the Andorian Lieutenant Talas is helping Lt. Reed with fixing Enterprise]

Lieutenant Talas:
For what it's worth, Lieutenant, I'm not here to steal your secrets. It would hardly be worth the effort.

Lt. Reed:
I beg your pardon?

Lieutenant Talas:
Last time I saw weapons like these was during my early tactical training.

Lt. Reed:
[sarcastically] Sorry I wasted your time on our primitive systems.

Lieutenant Talas:
Not at all. I found it nostalgic.

[Reed sneers indignantly]

Lieutenant Talas:
Just be careful when you reconnect that to your power grid. You didn't reset the EPS synchroniser. You may singe your eyebrows when you bring it back online.

Lt. Reed:
All we have left is to reset the emitters.

Lieutenant Talas:
What's the frequency?

Lt. Reed:
I'll do it.

Lieutenant Talas:
You don't trust me.

Lt. Reed:
No offence, but when it comes to our weapons frequencies, I wouldn't trust my own mother.

Lieutenant Talas:
Is your mother considered a security risk?

Lt. Reed:
It's just an expression.

Lieutenant Talas:
An odd one. My mother's security clearance is higher than mine.

Commander Dolum:
You don't want to know my specialty!

Captain Archer:
Let me guess... stinking up the room?

Travis Mayweather:
[after receiving a message in an Insectoid language] Doesn't exactly sound like "Welcome to the neighbourhood".

Subcommander T'Pol:
The Captain's behavior is becoming increasingly illogical, even for a human.

Commander Dolum:
I had no idea that humans were so resilient. It's not a trait found in most primate species.

Jannar:
Someone once said that dealing with Reptilians is like bargaining with the sun. You make no progress, and you come away burned.

[Archer is being interrogated violently by a Reptilian]

Captain Archer:
I'll bet you didn't know this, but at one time, most of my world was ruled by reptiles.

Commander Dolum:
I wasn't aware of that.

Captain Archer:
A comet hit around 65 million years ago caused a mass extinction. Most of the reptiles died out. Mammals became the dominant species.

Commander Dolum:
How unfortunate.

Captain Archer:
Still, the reptiles might have come out on top, if it hadn't been for a slight disadvantage.

Commander Dolum:
And what was that?

Captain Archer:
They had brains the size of a walnut. That's very small. Apparently, it's a constant in the universe.

Commander Dolum:
[resisting the urge to strangle Archer] Earth vessels... how many?

Captain Archer:
The reptiles didn't all die out. Some evolved into snakes, alligators, turtles. As a matter of fact, one of my favorite restaurants in San Francisco makes the most wonderful turtle soup. You should try it sometimes if you're ever in the area.

Commander Dolum:
[putting his hand to Archer's throat] You want me to kill you?

Captain Archer:
Just making conversation.

Commander Tucker:
[about flying the alien vessel] How difficult can it be? Up, down, forward, reverse. I'll figure it out.

Commander Tucker:
[to a Klingon] You tell 'em, big guy.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Maybe it's a log. What do you think?

Commander Tucker:
Beats me. Could be a laundry list... or instructions on how to conquer the universe?

Commander Tucker:
Where did you put the phase pistols?

Lt. Reed:
You're going to shoot a bug?

Commander Tucker:
I'm just going to stun it.

Dr. Phlox:
Tell me, did your visit to the Xyrillian ship involve any... uh... romance?

Commander Tucker:
What?

Dr. Phlox:
Were you intimate with anyone?

Commander Tucker:
Doc, I was over there to repair a warp reactor. What are you talking about?

Dr. Phlox:
Seems you did a little more than repair work.

Commander Tucker:
Meaning?

Dr. Phlox:
This is a nipple.

Commander Tucker:
I beg your pardon?

Dr. Phlox:
Ah, ah, the blastocyst is located between the sixth and seventh intercostals.

Commander Tucker:
What the hell are you talking about?

Dr. Phlox:
I'm not quite sure congratulations are in order, Commander, but you're pregnant.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I've run a check through the Starfleet database. You might be pleased to know that this is the first recorded incident of a human male becoming pregnant.

Commander Tucker:
Just how I always wanted to get into the history books.

Commander Tucker:
Someone hasn't been taking very good care of my engines.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Speak with the Klingons.

Lt. Reed:
What do you think of T'Pol, hmm? Do you think she's pretty?

Commander Tucker:
T'Pol? Are you serious?

Lt. Reed:
Well, she is a woman you know. I think she's pretty.

Commander Tucker:
You've had too much to drink.

Lt. Reed:
Don't tell me you've never noticed her, you know, in that way.

Commander Tucker:
Nah, she's a Vulcan.

Lt. Reed:
I think she's pretty.

Commander Tucker:
Oh, God.

Lt. Reed:
You ever noticed her bum?

Commander Tucker:
What?

Lt. Reed:
Her bum. She's got an awfully nice bum.

Commander Tucker:
[toasts] To Subcommander T'Pol.

Lt. Reed:
Awfully nice.

Commander Tucker:
I'm gonna have to put you up on report.

Lt. Reed:
I saved your life.

Commander Tucker:
You disobeyed a direct order.

Lt. Reed:
If you put that in my file, it will be years before I am up for a pro... [notices Trip is laughing] You're pulling my leg.

Commander Tucker:
[can't stop laughing] Malcolm, you're just so easy.

Commander Tucker:
A single ship on a dark planet? Maybe they're on their honeymoon.

Vulcan Captain:
Captain Archer?

Commander Tucker:
Yes? [long pause] Is there a problem?

Vulcan Captain:
You seem very young for a Starfleet captain.

Commander Tucker:
Healthy living. You have a message from Admiral Forrest?

Vulcan Captain:
I'm not certain what this means but Admiral Forrest asked me to inform you that "Cal beat Stanford seven to three."

Commander Tucker:
I'll be sure to tell him.

Vulcan Captain:
Tell who?

Commander Tucker:
I'm afraid it's confidential. Thank you for relaying the message. Archer out.

Travis Mayweather:
[Trip slips on some loose rocks] Commander, are you all right?

Commander Tucker:
Just testing the rope.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Commander, are you feeling alright?

Commander Tucker:
People are gossiping T'Pol. Malcolm thinks we are doing more than neural pressure.

Subcommander T'Pol:
We are both senior officers. If we were pursuing a romantic relationship, it wouldn't be Lieutenant Reed's concern, would it?

Commander Tucker:
I suppose not.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Shall we continue?

Commander Tucker:
I'm getting punchy.

Dr. Phlox:
Why aren't you getting together with T'Pol to get your neural nodes stimulated? Too intimate?

Commander Tucker:
Nah, I don't have an hour a night to waste in T'Pol's quarters. Isn't there something else I could do.

Dr. Phlox:
There is Alderberan mud leeches.

Commander Tucker:
What the hell am I supposed to do with those?

Dr. Phlox:
Place one on your chest and one on your abdomen an hour before going to bed. Their secretions act as a natural sedative. Oh, uh, please be careful to sleep on your back. If you roll over, you might anger them.

Commander Tucker:
Maybe an hour a night with T'pol isn't so bad.

Lt. Reed:
So what is happening between you and Amanda?

Commander Tucker:
We are just friends. Is everyone on this ship watching us?

Lt. Reed:
You're hard to miss.

Commander Tucker:
That's what T'Pol said.

Lt. Reed:
Is it true that she's giving Amanda neuropressure now? I heard it was damage control from your tender touch.

Commander Tucker:
T'Pol's just smoothing out some of the rough spots. [very clipped voice] That's all.

Lt. Reed:
Why were you giving Amanda Cole neuropressure anyway?

Commander Tucker:
[very defensive] What's it to you?

Lt. Reed:
Well, from what I've been told it's a pretty intimate procedure. Sure you're just friends?

Commander Tucker:
I do it with T'Pol. Are you implying that there is something going on there, as well?

Lt. Reed:
That's the rumor.

Commander Tucker:
For the last time, there is nothing going on with any of us. Between any of us.

Lt. Reed:
Right. Just friends?

Commander Tucker:
That's right.

Lt. Reed:
I guess this Vulcan neuropressure isn't that intimate after all.

Commander Tucker:
Exactly.

Lt. Reed:
In that case, I've got this nasty little pain...

Commander Tucker:
[voice very clipped] Just drop it.

Commander Tucker:
[Commander Tucker is having trouble with the computer at an alien repair station] Where can someone go to file a grievance around here?

Commander Tucker:
Have you talked to Lorian yet? He's a good kid, maybe you should get to know him.

Subcommander T'Pol:
No, I haven't and he is not a kid, he's over 100 years old.

Commander Tucker:
[laughs] Only in the expanse could I have a kid three times my age. Who would have thought, you and me, huh? Lorian says we're going to be married in a traditional Vulcan ceremony. It's gonna take me weeks to learn to pronounce the vows. You know where we are going to have our honeymoon? Cargo Bay Three! He says, "I'll fill it up with sand that we dug up from a passing asteroid". I'm even supposed to, [laughs] manufacture a palm tree.

Subcommander T'Pol:
It's ridiculous to assume that those events are going to happen. Hand me the flux coupler.

Commander Tucker:
Aren't you at all curious about how you and I are supposed to end up together?

Subcommander T'Pol:
The fact that our counterparts marry doesn't mean we'll do the same.

Commander Tucker:
You're afraid to admit that under the right circumstances, you could have feelings for me. Maybe you have them already.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I should've known this was a mistake.

Commander Tucker:
What?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Exploring human sexuality with you. You're obviously unable to have a physical relaionship without developing an emotional attachment.

Commander Tucker:
You know, all the other women on board must have been taken, because I can't imagine any other reason why I would've married someone as stubborn as you.

Subcommander T'Pol:
What do you suggest I do?

Subcommander T'Pol:
[old T'Pol] There's a human expression. "Follow your heart."

Subcommander T'Pol:
What if my heart doesn't know what it wants?

Subcommander T'Pol:
[old T'Pol] It will, in time, It will.

Dr. Phlox:
When was the last time you slept?

Commander Tucker:
T'Pol tattling on me?

Dr. Phlox:
She's worried about you.

Commander Tucker:
I appreciate that, but I'm holding this ship together with spit and bailing wire.

Dr. Phlox:
Six hours.

Commander Tucker:
Two.

Dr. Phlox:
Four.

Commander Tucker:
Done. And remind me never to buy a car from you.

Commander Tucker:
Computer, begin recording. Dear Mr. and Mrs. Taylor, by the time you get this, Starfleet will have already told you about Jane. Since I worked so closely with her, I wanted to add my personal condolences. I have to admit, I've been putting off writing this for a while. I convinced myself that my duties on Enterprise took precedence. But the truth is I didn't want to face the fact that someone so young with so much promise could just be gone. But I'm facing it now. And I find myself thinking how important she was to me. She was a great engineer. And she was my friend. She won't be forgotten.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You've dismissed all my proposals.

Commander Tucker:
When you come up with one which doesn't involve blowing ourselves up, I'll be a little more enthusiastic.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You might surprise me with an idea of your own.

Commander Tucker:
Maybe you haven't had time to meditate. I don't know. But whatever's going on with you lately, I've had enough. I'll work on this in Engineering. Call me if you have any more brilliant ideas. [he turns to leave]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Commander... Trip! [he stops and comes back] Everything that's happened recently has caused me to become slightly emotional.

Commander Tucker:
I've noticed.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I apologize.

Commander Tucker:
Forget about it.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I wish I could. It may take some time for me to regain my control. It will be difficult for me to deal with, especially... on my own.

Commander Tucker:
This hasn't been easy for any of us. You know how much I appreciate what you did for me. When this is over, I'm all ears. Why don't we take another crack at this?

Commander Tucker:
We should have heard something by now. What if they failed? Earth could be... [T'pol puts a hand on his shoulder to calm him]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Be patient.

Commander Tucker:
[looks at her hand] My skin's healing faster than yours. I guess you Vulcans aren't so tough after all.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Dr. Phlox says we should all be back to normal within two to three days.

Commander Tucker:
I'm only kidding. You look nice like this, kind of like an old oil painting.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I am not old. I will only be 66 years old on my next birthday.

Commander Tucker:
I can't believe you told me that.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You accused me of looking old!

Commander Tucker:
That's not what I mean. I've been trying to get you to tell me your age since we left space dock. Why now?

Subcommander T'Pol:
To Vulcans, certain information is considered... intimate.

Commander Tucker:
Intimate? Hmm.

T'Les:
How long have you been romantically involved with my daughter? [off, Trip surprised face] How long have you been attracted to her?

Commander Tucker:
Since our first argument, I felt the chemistry between us. But, I had a feeling T'Pol wasn't going to mention it.

T'Les:
She didn't. I'm her mother.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[explaining in Vulcan why Trip is with her] Commander Tucker is my colleague, he wanted to visit Vulcan.

T'Les:
[in Vulcan] This is the first time you've brought a colleague home with you.

T'Les:
[on why T'Pol doesn't want to marry Koss] It's because of Commander Tucker, isn't it? He's the reason why you refuse to bond with Koss. Do you really believe that a human and a Vulcan can have a future together? Imagine the shame your children would endure, assuming the two you could have children.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[angrily] That wouldn't be your concern.

[about the transporter]

Lt. Reed:
I don't think I'm quite ready to have my molecules compressed into a data stream.

Captain Archer:
I hope nobody's in a hurry to get back home... Starfleet seems to think we're ready to begin our mission.

[to T'Pol]

Captain Archer:
You have no idea how much I'm restraining myself from knocking you on your ass.

Zefram Cochrane:
On this site, a powerful engine will be built... an engine that will someday let us travel a hundred times faster than we can today. Imagine it. Thousands of inhabited planets at our fingertips. And we'll be able to explore those strange new worlds... and seek out new life and new civilizations. This engine will let us go boldly... where no man has gone before.

[Porthos has run from the shuttlepod to some trees on an alien world]

Commander Tucker:
Going where no dog has gone before.

Captain Jean-Luc Picard:
[the final lines in the show] Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its continuing mission...

Captain James T. Kirk:
...to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations...

Captain Archer:
...to boldly go where no man has gone before.

Vulcan Captain:
[First Contact in the mirror universe] Live long and prosper. [Zephram Cochrane pulls out a shotgun and shoots him]

Grizzled Human:
Board their ship! Take everything you can! [humans go running into the Vulcan scoutship to loot it]

Zobral:
I wouldn't be a good host if I allow my guests to be killed.

Captain William T. Riker:
[on Archer's ready room] The brig is bigger than this!

[observing an unconscious Klingon pilot]

Admiral Leonard:
He's a Kling-ot.

Tos:
A Kling-on.

Captain Archer:
Where'd he come from?

Commander Williams:
Oklahoma.

[on Archer's forthcoming first mission with the Enterprise]

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
Don't screw this up.

Commander Tucker:
I've heard the women on Draylax have...

Travis Mayweather:
Three... it's true.

Commander Tucker:
You know that first-hand?

Travis Mayweather:
First-hand, second-hand, third-hand...

Commander Tucker:
Grandma taught me never to judge a species by their eating habits.

Sarin:
The Cabal doesn't make decisions on its own. They're simply soldiers... fighting a Temporal Cold War.

Captain Archer:
Temporal? You've lost me.

Dr. Phlox:
Medically speaking, there's no accounting for taste.

[after boarding a damaged Klingon ship and finding several Klingons unconscious on the bridge]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Shouldn't we try to help them?

Subcommander T'Pol:
They don't want our help.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
How do you know?

Subcommander T'Pol:
They're Klingons.

Commander Tucker:
It can laugh all it wants, the galaxy's not getting any of our bourbon.

[Mayweather has broken his leg on an alien planet and returned to the ship]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Why didn't you let them finish treating you on the surface?

Travis Mayweather:
Have you ever been to an alien hospital?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Yes, in San Francisco.

[Upon waking up bound in a basement on Risa]

Commander Tucker:
You think this is my fault?

Lt. Reed:
You were willing to follow two strange aliens into a basement.

Commander Tucker:
Gorgeous aliens. Don't forget they were gorgeous.

Lt. Reed:
They were male.

Commander Tucker:
Not at first.

[to an alien computer]

Commander Tucker:
On my world we have a saying "the customer's always right." Maybe you should make that part of your programming.

Captain Archer:
You're from 900 years in the future, and you need MY help?

Dr. Phlox:
It's unethical to harm a patient. However, I can inflict as much pain as I like.

Commander Tucker:
Malcolm's got this rule; you have to be taller than a gun to use it.

[T'Pol answers one of the Captain's suggestions]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Captain, this may surprise you, but I agree.

[Tucker informs the Vulcans that Captain Archer and T'Pol have been kidnapped]

Vulcan Captain:
How do you know this?

Commander Tucker:
I don't know, maybe it was the ransom demand we just received.

Subcommander T'Pol:
How are your parents?

Commander Tucker:
They're... fine. They moved into a new house in Mississippi. It's not like the old place in Panama City, but it's pretty nice. Why do you ask?

Subcommander T'Pol:
You haven't spoken of them recently.

Commander Tucker:
There hasn't been a lot of time to catch up.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You also haven't joined us at the Captain's table since we left earth.

Commander Tucker:
What are you trying to say?

Subcommander T'Pol:
You've been avoiding me.

Commander Tucker:
Well, maybe I have. You've got to admit it's a little awkward. You're married. I know you did it to help your mother, but it's going to take me a little while to adjust.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm still adjusting to it myself.

Commander Tucker:
This is going to sound strange, but as tough as it was watching you go through the ceremony, I was proud of you for what you did. I guess it's for the best.

Subcommander T'Pol:
What do you mean?

Commander Tucker:
Come on. It's not like we would have made the ideal couple... a Vulcan and a human? Romeo and Juliet probably stood a better chance.

Commander Tucker:
Well this isn't what I expected.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Meaning?

Commander Tucker:
Well it's beautiful.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Vulcans appreciate beauty.

Commander Tucker:
[Walks around her] Well you always were a snazzy dresser.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Commander Tucker, I suggest... [T'Pol's mother T'Les walks up behind them] Mother I didn't expect you home so early.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[about her marriage to Koss] Trip, I have to do this... for many reasons.

Commander Tucker:
And how am I supposed to take this?

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm sorry.

Commander Tucker:
You're sorry. You brought me 16 light years just to watch you get married to someone you barely know.

T'Les:
Have you informed T'Pol?

Commander Tucker:
Informed her of what?

T'Les:
You're in love with her.

Commander Tucker:
[seeing T'Pol in her brial gown] You look amazing.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Thank you for coming.

Commander Tucker:
Wouldn't have missed it for the world. [He goes to leave, she stops him for a second to give him a kiss on the cheek and walks away]

Dr. Arik Soong:
Oh, Commander Tucker, I'm so sorry about the loss of your "Vulcan" friend.

Captain Archer:
That's enough!

Commander Tucker:
You're supposed to be resting.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Dr. Phlox says I can resume my duties this afternoon.

Commander Tucker:
I'm glad they got that thing off with no problem.

Subcommander T'Pol:
There's a slight ringing in my left ear, but it should dissipate over time.

Commander Tucker:
Well, I'll let you get back to that. [He turns to leave]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Vulcans don't have honeymoons. [He comes back] After the ceremony I went to Mt. Seleya to meditate [clears throat]... alone.

Commander Tucker:
It's none of my business anyway.

Dr. Arik Soong:
[to T'Pol] Sorry about that business with the Orions, I hope you wern't permanently injured.

Commander Tucker:
Why don't you stay focused on what you are doing.

Dr. Arik Soong:
Ooh! Someone's a little protective of Commander T'Pol.

Commander Tucker:
I just don't like you very much.

Commander Tucker:
I never got the impression you cared that much about humans. Seems like you were always finding something new to complain about.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
I lived on Earth for more than 30 years, Commander. In that time I developed an affinity for your world and its people.

Commander Tucker:
You did a pretty good job of hiding it.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Thank You.

Commander Tucker:
[to T'Pol as Sim] The thing is this is not just some highschool crush, that was two days ago. You're all I think about and what drives me crazy is I don't know if these are my feelings or his.

Commander Tucker:
You did all that... with a phase pistol?

Lt. Reed:
You're good at building things. I'm good at blowing them up.

Captain Archer:
[Archer and T'Pol are being stalked by a large, ravenous Vulcan sehlat] How long before it starts to lose interest in us?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Days, at least. They're very persistent creatures. When I was a child I had one as a pet.

Captain Archer:
You had one of those?

Subcommander T'Pol:
Domesticated. They're smaller... slightly.

Captain Archer:
How slightly?

Subcommander T'Pol:
You have Porthos.

[referring to Captain Archer's pet beagle]

Captain Archer:
Porthos doesn't try and eat me when I'm late with his dinner.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Vulcan children are *never* late with their sehlat's dinner.

Captain Archer:
I can believe that.

[they are on an alien vessel which is blowing up all around them]

Commander Tucker:
You did all this with just a phase pistol?

Lt. Reed:
You're good at building things, I'm good at blowing them up.

[Shran, about to return to Andor, says goodbye to Archer]

Shran:
Try to stay out of trouble, pink-skin.

Captain Archer:
You missed T'Pol's latest battle with chopsticks.

Commander Tucker:
Darn. Dinner and a show.

Subcommander T'Pol:
The Earth cargo ship Fortunate. Y-class freighter. Maximum speed: warp one point eight. Crew complement: twenty-three.

Travis Mayweather:
Not counting newborn babies.

Captain Archer:
Ensign?

Travis Mayweather:
I grew up on a J-class, a little smaller but the same basic design. And one thing I can tell you is that at warp one point eight, you've got a lot of time on your hands between ports. That's how my parents wound up with me.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Do you have any helpful information on this vessel beyond its recreational activities?

[Malcolm has just awoken from a fantasy about T'Pol]

Lt. Reed:
What's that?

Commander Tucker:
I got the receiver working but the transmitter's a lost cause. Who's Stinky?

Lt. Reed:
I beg your pardon?

Commander Tucker:
You were talking in your sleep. Kept calling for some guy named Stinky.

Commander Tucker:
I don't want to be responsible for giving the crew... the runs.

Kaitaama:
Is your entire species so ill mannered?

Commander Tucker:
Nope. Just me.

[Malcolm mentions he is going to reread Ulysses]

Commander Tucker:
I'd rather realign every microcircuit on this shuttle than try to read through that baby.

Lt. Reed:
British schools have a core curriculum. It serves to provide a well-rounded education. Sometimes I think you North Americans read nothing but comic books and those ridiculous science fiction novels.

Commander Tucker:
I'll have you know that Superman was laced with metaphor. Subtext layered on subtext.

Captain Archer:
I believe someone once defined a compromise as a solution that neither side is happy with.

Shran:
In that case, these talks have been extremely successful.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
You're the captain. Can't you order the storm to calm down?

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Captain Archer, your presence on this mission has not been... unduly burdensome.

[Soval leaves]

Shran:
I think he likes you, pink-skin.

[while in the escape pod, Trip tastes the food Kaitaama discovered in a storage locker]

Kaitaama:
Is it edible?

Commander Tucker:
Depends how hungry you are.

[in "Carpenter Street", the time travel episode]

Loomis:
Oh boy.

[Silik is trying to operate his time-travel device, when Archer suddenly appears and attacks him]

Captain Archer:
I said, you're an ugly BASTARD.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I'm a translator. I didn't come out here to see corpses hanging on hooks.

Dr. Phlox:
It goes without saying that you're going to encounter the unexpected.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Not corpses on hooks.

Captain Archer:
When I used to dream about this mission, the last thing I envisioned was having a Vulcan onboard who continuously sucked the air out of the room.

Dr. Phlox:
If I'm not mistaken, they are preparing to mate. Do you think they might let me watch?

Commander Tucker:
I don't like pushing the engines at 110%

Subcommander T'Pol:
They are rated for 120

Commander Tucker:
My underwear's flame-retardant, but it doesn't mean I want to set fire to myself to prove it.

Captain Archer:
I've always been much better at avoiding farewells than giving them, so I'm not even gonna try. But I'm going to ask all of you to think back to the day when this ship was first launched. We were explorers then. When all this is over, when Earth is safe, I want you to get back to that job. There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy. We've only explored a tiny fraction of them. We have a lot to do. Of all the captains that'll sit in this chair, I can't imagine any of them being more proud than I am right now.

[on a planet with a toxic atmosphere]

Captain Archer:
[to Reed] Try not to breathe.

Subcommander T'Pol:
"Delicate" is not a word I associate with Mr. Tucker.

Commander Tucker:
[in the Mirror Universe] I've absorbed enough delta rays to guarantee my grandchildren glow-in-the-dark.

[Hoshi sees the captain dressed in a 23rd century uniform]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
These people had some strange ideas about uniforms.

[the evil Archer and Hoshi from the Mirror Universe have learned of a parallel universe]

Captain Archer:
Instead of building an empire, Earth became part of an interspecies alliance.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[reading] The United Federation of Planets.

Captain Archer:
More like a Federation of Fools.

Captain Archer:
[in the Mirror Universe] Great men are not peacemakers, great men are conquerors!

Subcommander T'Pol:
[in the Mirror Universe] I noticed you've been making extensive use of the library database.

Dr. Phlox:
I was merely researching classical literature. I wanted to compare our major works with their counterparts in the other universe. I skimmed a few of the more celebrated narratives. The stories were similar in some respects, but their characters were weak and compassionate. With the exception of Shakespeare, of course. What I can tell, his plays were equally grim in both universes.

[a visibly distressed T'Pol is trying to convince Archer not to go on a suicide mission]

Subcommander T'Pol:
I don't want you to die!

[pause; Archer turns to look at her]

Subcommander T'Pol:
It's not necessary.

[Xindi council members are debating whether or not to attack Earth]

Xindi-Humanoid:
Let's not forget who the real enemy is.

Degra:
We may not KNOW who the real enemy is.

Captain Archer:
Enterprise was designed to be a ship of exploration.

Degra:
If we're successful, it will be again.

Dr. Phlox:
That's it, time's up!

Commander Tucker:
It sure is.

Commander Dolum:
Patience is for the dead.

Xindi-Humanoid:
[Archer has apparently died in the destruction of the superweapon] Your captain's sacrifice... will not be forgotten.

Dr. Jeremy Lucas:
You son of a b*tch!

Dr. Arik Soong:
Actually, mother was a chemist.

Commander Tucker:
How many warning shots do Vulcans usually fire?

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
None.

[Dr. Phlox and Crewman Cutler are watching a movie in the ship's movie theatre]

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
We can go if you're bored.

Dr. Phlox:
No, no, I'd like to stay and see what happens.

[someone from the audience hisses for silence]

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
You won't be disappointed. The ending's classic.

Dr. Phlox:
No, not the film. I'm sensing a rising emotional undercurrent in the room. I'm curious to see if it culminates in some kind of group response.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
They don't have movies where you come from, do they?

Dr. Phlox:
Well, we had something similar a few hundred years ago, but they lost their appeal when people discovered their real lives were more interesting.

[Archer and T'Pol are tied back-to-back to each other]

Captain Archer:
Houdini could get out of this.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Perhaps you should invite him on your next mission.

[a Vulcan captain abruptly cuts off transmission]

Commander Tucker:
I'm getting real sick of being cut off.

[T'Pol is lying in sick bay after saving a Vulcan Captain's life]

Captain Archer:
[to Vulcan Captain] I know how you must feel. She saved my life once too. She can be a real pain-in-the-ass. Stubborn, arrogant. Sometimes, she makes me angry enough, I want to shove her out of an airlock. I can understand why the High Command is upset. But it took a lot of courage to step in front of that plasma bullet. Do you really want to take her back home in disgrace?

[Lt. Reed has a bad case of the cold]

Lt. Reed:
[sneezes] We can travel faster than the speed of light. You'd think we could find a cure for the common cold.

Dr. Phlox:
You should be grateful. A human cold is so mild. I once had a patient with the Kamaraazite flu. He sneezed so violently, he nearly regurgitated his pineal gland.

Bu'kaH:
I've never seen your kind before, but you have made an enemy of the Klingon Empire.

Captain Archer:
From what I've noticed, that's not hard to do.

Captain Archer:
Remind me to stop trying to help people.

Captain Archer:
[after being ranted at by a female Klingon he's trying to help] Remind me to stop trying to help people.

UPN Voice Over:
[From UPN Episodic Radio Commercial Voiceover - Episode 091: "Affliction"] Who do you trust when you can't believe your own eyes?

Dr. Phlox:
Lieutenant? Are you passing through or is there something I can help you with?

Lt. Reed:
Actually, there is something.

Dr. Phlox:
Yes?

Lt. Reed:
I assume I can depend on doctor-patient confidentiality?

Dr. Phlox:
This wouldn't have anything to do with gastrointestinal distress?

Lt. Reed:
Is it that obvious?

Dr. Phlox:
Not at all. There's a notation in your medical file. Something about, er, an unfortunate incident during zero-G training.

Lt. Reed:
The EV simulator at Lunaport. Or, as Starfleet trainees call it: the Vomitorium.

[Archer, T'Pol and Ambassador Soval are hiding from hostile Andorians]

Captain Archer:
No offense, but my ears are less likely to draw fire then yours.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
[to T'Pol] What is their fixation with our ears?

Subcommander T'Pol:
I believe they are envious.

Dr. Phlox:
The will of the patient is the cornerstone of Denobulan medical ethics.

Captain Archer:
Don't you believe if you can help someone, you're ethically bound to do so?

Dr. Phlox:
Hippocrates wasn't Denobulan.

Commander Tucker:
It'll be nice to have a first contact where no-one's thinking about charging weapons.

[Dr. Phlox is infected by nanomachines and is slowly changing into a Borg]

Dr. Phlox:
Why are you wearing a phase pistol?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Oh, it's Lt. Reed's idea. If you come near me, I'm supposed to shoot you.

Dr. Phlox:
I hope you'll use the stun setting.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Are you saying you believe time travel is possible?

Dr. Phlox:
Surprises, subcommander. I believe in embracing surprises.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I prefer to embrace logic.

[after finding a ship from the future with a corpse in it that has both human and Vulcan genes, T'Pol has to make a report for the Vulcan High Command]

Captain Archer:
I wonder... if they'll believe that humans and Vulcans will be... swapping chromosomes one day.

Subcommander T'Pol:
They're more likely to believe in time travel.

Captain Archer:
One thing I learned from A.G.: you're never gonna get anywhere without taking risks.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You obviously admired this man.

Captain Archer:
Quite a bit.

Subcommander T'Pol:
And yet he cracked your molar.

Captain Archer:
[sn*ggers] Humans can have funny ways of forming friendships.

Subcommander T'Pol:
To say the least.

[Subcommander T'Pol is leaving the Enterprise]

Commander Tucker:
You're gonna miss her, aren't you?

Captain Archer:
When they first assigned her, I felt like strangling Soval.

Commander Tucker:
She does kinda grow on you.

Captain Archer:
We should be entering the nebula.

Subcommander T'Pol:
The readings could be misleading.

Captain Archer:
As Dr. Phlox would say - optimism.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Optimism doesn't alter the laws of physics.

[Archer and Robinson are making an illegal warp flight]

Captain Archer:
[over the radio] NX-Beta to Commodore Forrest. You might wanna check your sensors. You'll see were holding steady at 2.5.

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
Congratulations. Now get the hell back here!

Lt. Reed:
I've also been working on a new alert signal. Tell me what you think. [pushes button, and a highly annoying sound goes off] Or this one? [pushes another button, another irritating sound]

Commander Tucker:
[looks highly annoyed, then deactivates sound]

Lt. Reed:
Which one do you prefer?

Commander Tucker:
For what?

Lt. Reed:
A tactical alert!

Commander Tucker:
They both sound like a bag full of cats!

Lt. Reed:
Well, they were designed to get your attention!

[Archer is obsessed with writing a preface for the biography of his father, and recites the first page to Cmr. Tucker]

Captain Archer:
What do you think?

Commander Tucker:
Sounds good.

Captain Archer:
Let me read you the rest.

Commander Tucker:
I really need to get to work on this.

Captain Archer:
It's just a few more pages!

Commander Tucker:
How many more?

Captain Archer:
Nineteen.

Commander Tucker:
*Nineteen*? Are you writing the preface or the book?

Captain Archer:
[agitated] I've got a lot to say!

Commander Tucker:
No kidding!

Captain Archer:
[agitated] What's that supposed to mean?

Commander Tucker:
If I may, sir... it's a little long-winded.

Captain Archer:
[highly insulted] You're lucky you're a decent engineer, because you obviously don't know anything about writing!

Commander Tucker:
[agitated] I'm not the only one!

[Archer, Tucker and Reed are highly agitated from a nearby radiation source]

Commander Tucker:
[showing Archer his schematics for the new Captain's chair] You might want to see this, sir! Interactive status displays, secondary helm control. It's even got inertial micro-dampers. The ship could be shakin' apart and you'd hardly feel a thing!

Lt. Reed:
[frustrated] You ignored a Tactical Alert for this?

Commander Tucker:
[ignores Reed] I want to run some colours by you for the head rest.

Lt. Reed:
This is all a big joke to you!

Commander Tucker:
[to Reed] Give it a rest!

Lt. Reed:
This isn't a bloody pleasure cruise! Without proper discipline on this ship, this mission is doomed!

Commander Tucker:
[highly annoyed] Why don't you play soldier somewhere else?

Lt. Reed:
[with suppressed anger] If this were a military situation, you'd be taken out and shot!

[Tucker and Reed start fighting]

Captain Archer:
Hey! [he breaks them apart, then slams Tucker against the wall.] I don't care what colour the headrest is, or whether it can serve me ice-tea! I just want to sit when I'm on duty! [releases Tucker, then slams Reed against the wall.] And if I hear that alarm one more time, I may have *you* taken out and shot! [releases Reed, then turns to T'Pol.] Unless there's a *real* emergency, like a reactor breach, I don't want to be disturbed!

Captain Archer:
[while wading through a sewer] Sewage takes on a whole new meaning when it comes from a dozen different species.

Kessick:
31, to be exact.

[Lt. Reed's stomach has been mutated]

Lt. Reed:
Have you got anything for my stomach? Chef's food isn't sitting too well.

Dr. Phlox:
Till your digestive tract is fully restored, you may want to avoid Mess Hall.

Lt. Reed:
What do you suggest I eat?

Dr. Phlox:
You're welcome to some of the moth larvae I feed to my Pyrithian bat.

[the crew is watching a detective movie from the '40s in the mess hall]

Dr. Phlox:
Something tells me we haven't seen the last of the detective with the bow tie.

Commander Tucker:
No, he died in a house fire.

Dr. Phlox:
Ah, did he? The autopsy was inconclusive. I wouldn't be surprised if the body belonged to the delivery man. With the strange limp. You never did see him leave the house.

Commander Tucker:
What about the gardener? He was there too.

Dr. Phlox:
Too tall. Even the primitive forensics of the mid-20th century would have determined that.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[annoyed by the distraction] Perhaps we should watch and find out.

Commander Tucker:
Part of the fun of a mystery is trying to solve it before it ends, using logic. You of all people should appreciate that.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Then use logic more quietly.

[Hoshi is left in the company of a stranger]

Captain Archer:
Do I have to tell you to stay on your toes?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I think that falls under the goes-without-saying category, sir.

Captain Archer:
Did you bring a phase-pistol?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I'll keep it under my pillow.

Captain Archer:
Remember that proto-star we ran across last week?

Commander Tucker:
Yeah.

Captain Archer:
I'm not seeing it here. [indicating a Vulcan star chart]

Commander Tucker:
Are you saying those Vulcan star charts aren't all that accurate? Well, if that's true, good luck getting them to admit it.

[Archer wants to visit the Vulcan monastery at P'Jem]

Captain Archer:
How d'you think they'd feel about a visit?

Subcommander T'Pol:
P'Jem is a place of quiet contemplation, captain. I'm not certain we'd be welcome.

Commander Tucker:
It's because Vulcans think we smell bad, isn't it?

Captain Archer:
[after hearing the rules for visiting a Vulcan monastery] I thought Starfleet training was tough.

Captain Archer:
So if anyone has a suggestion, I'm all ears... [realizing there are Vulcans in the room] No offense.

Commander Tucker:
[to a Vulcan] For people without emotion, you sure have a flair for the dramatic.

Dr. Phlox:
Commander Tucker reassigned the repair team that that was working here. He said the Armoury was a higher priority. We'll see how low a priority I am the next time he burns his fingers on a plasma conduit.

Dr. Phlox:
I'm a physician, not an engineer.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Whatever friction there's been between us, I'd like to try to minimize it.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Friction is to be expected whenever people work in close quarters for extended periods of time.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I guess that's always been true, especially when the people are of the opposite sex.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Then it's good that you're my superior officer, that we're not in a position to allow ourselves to become attracted to one another, hypothetically. If we were, the friction that you speak of could be much more... problematic.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I really thought you were beginning to understand something about human feelings.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Not when it pertains to primitive quadrupeds who haven't developed the ability to speak or to use a toilet.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
An old girlfriend's mother had... this beagle I was crazy about. Even after her daughter and I broke up, we stayed in touch. When the dog got pregnant, I was the first one she called. Four males in the litter - the Four Musketeers. I've had Porthos since he was six weeks old.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[on the Kreetassans] We obviously offended them again.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Maybe my hair's parted on the wrong side.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[referring to the Kreetassans] I'm told I've offended these people twice, once for eating in front of them, the second time I don't even know what for. But if their carelessness has hurt Porthos, or God forbid, ends up killing him - they're gonna find out what being offended is all about.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
If anything happens to Porthos, I'll be the one watering their Alvera trees!

Dr. Phlox:
You needn't be concerned. I hold six degrees in interspecies veterinary medicine.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I thought you were just... you know a... people doctor.

Dr. Phlox:
As a matter of fact, I've also earned degrees in dentistry, hematology, botanical pharmacology...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[making a surrendering gesture] I'm impressed!

Dr. Phlox:
Have you considered that your anger may encompass more than just Porthos and the Kreetassans?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What?

Dr. Phlox:
How long has it been since you were intimate with a woman?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What?

Dr. Phlox:
How long has it been...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I heard you! I suppose you're gonna tell me you have a degree in psychiatry too.

Dr. Phlox:
Absolutely.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to T'Pol] When you get back to the bridge, why don't you send me your lips?... lisp... list!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Let me ask you a question, Doc, just out of curiosity - are there any dogs on your homeworld?

Dr. Phlox:
The Denobulan lemur is highly sought after. It's... not exactly a dog, but you could say it's doglike; it has tail, fur, most have one head...

Dr. Phlox:
We should both try to get a few hours of rest. If there are any changes in his vital signs, the alarms are quite loud.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[of Porthos] Is he comfortable?

Dr. Phlox:
He's fast asleep.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm glad to see someone is.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Feel better, Porthos.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Did you have any pets when you were a kid?

Dr. Phlox:
My people don't keep pets.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I thought you said something about... the Denobulan lemur being highly sought after.

Dr. Phlox:
Oh, very much so. Their kidneys are considered a great delicacy.

Dr. Phlox:
If you were a married man, I'd be wondering if your wife had thrown you out.

[when Archer enters sickbay with his bedding]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Does your expertise on... sexual tension come from professional training or... firsthand experience?

Dr. Phlox:
I do have three wives.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
And they each have...

Dr. Phlox:
Two husbands, besides myself.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Sounds very complicated.

Dr. Phlox:
Very. Why else be polygamous?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You're gonna drown my dog?

Dr. Phlox:
Only for an hour, Captain. There should be no problem resuscitating him once the surgery's complete.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
How many times have you done this before?

Dr. Phlox:
Never.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[alarmed] Has anyone done this before?

Dr. Phlox:
Not to my knowledge.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
If Porthos pulls through, will he need... a special diet or treatments, having a chameleon's pituitary gland?

Dr. Phlox:
Hm... You may have trouble finding him. He'll have the ability to blend into his background when frightened.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You're kidding.

Dr. Phlox:
Yes, I am.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You know, this isn't some guinea pig you're working on here, this is Porthos, my beagle, my pal! And from what you're telling me, the closest thing your people have to pets are furry little things that go well with onions!

[Archer has accidentally spilled a viscous liquid over Phlox]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
That stuff isn't poisonous, is it?

[Phlox takes some of it on his finger and tastes it]

Dr. Phlox:
Nah, I'll be fine.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[of the Kreetassans] They're not interested in punishing you. They only want an appropriate apology.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm sorry!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
For what?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Just practicing.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[reading the reconciliation demands of the Kreetassans] Well, this isn't so bad. I was sure there'd be something in here about standing on one foot with my eyes shut, reciting 'The Night before Christmas'!

Dr. Phlox:
[in Archer's dream] We are gathered here today, to bid a final farewell to a faithful and kind colleague, a friend, who would never hesitate to offer his paw, in exchange for a simple smile, or a slice of cheese. Like his namesake, this quadruped believed we should stand together, all for one, and one for all.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Listen, Doc, however this turns out, I want to apologize for... accusing you of being insensitive before.

Dr. Phlox:
As I recall, you accused my entire species of being insensitive.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Then I apologize to you and all your fellow Denobulans.

Dr. Phlox:
Well, I can't speak for the others, but on behalf of myself, I accept. And to think, T'Pol told me you were incapable of apologizing.

Dr. Phlox:
[referring to his family] You asked me if I miss them. The answer is yes - every one of them. The children, the wives... even the other husbands. But we Denobulans live a long time, Captain, and right now, there's nowhere I'd rather be than serving with the Interspecies Medical Exchange aboard this wonderful vessel of yours.

Dr. Phlox:
I hear things went very well on the surface.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I doubt I would have even gone down there, if it hadn't been for you, Doc. I owe you one.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It's been one hell of a night, hasn't it?

[last lines]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Sickbay's all yours.

Dr. Phlox:
You're welcome back anytime, Captain.

Grish:
[talking to someone off camera] Where is the vault? Do you understand me?

[next shot shows that he's talking to Porthos the dog, who barks back at him]

Grish:
I can't lock onto its language.

Muk:
It's a lower life form, you fool. Probably the captain's next meal.

Grish:
Don't be so sure. Look at the size of its ears.

[the Ferengi have plundered Enterprise]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What do you need all this for, anyway? You seem to already have plenty of technology.

Krem:
One can never have too much. The Rules of Acquisition say "Expand or die."

Captain Jonathan Archer:
"Rules of Acquisition"?

Krem:
Mm, that's rule number 45. I've memorized all 173, including the most important one: "A man is only worth the sum of his possessions."

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Back on my homeworld, that kind of thinking almost destroyed our civilization.

Krem:
You should've managed your businesses better.

Ulis:
Krem, start loading the merchandise.

Krem:
Why am I always stuck doing the menial labor?

Ulis:
[pointing at Archer] Make *him* do it.

Krem:
This female... is different from the others. What species is she?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
She's a Vulcan.

Krem:
Vulcan...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
They're really not all that interesting once you get to know them.

Krem:
I'd like to get to know this one. Maybe I won't sell her... not right away.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Trust me. She's got no sense of humor. She's always complaining.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
There are times I wish Vulcans hadn't learned to repress their violent tendencies.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Just because a guy's in his underwear, you think the worst.

[on T'Pol's startled reaction regarding his outfit]

Krem:
[Rule of Acquisition #6] Never allow family to stand in the way of profit.

[Muk is suspecting Ulis to have taken his scanners]

Ulis:
Are you calling me a thief?

Muk:
Everybody knows you'd steal the wax out of your own mother's ears!

Muk:
Do I look like a Menk to you?

[referencing the inferior species of the planet Valakis, which the Enterprise crew encountered earlier that year]

Ulis:
We had a deal.

Muk:
I'm amending it.

Ulis:
Time's running out. Someone has to stay and finish loading the ship.

Grish:
That's Krem's job.

Krem:
I'm tired of doing this job. I don't wanna do all the menial work!

Ulis:
Krem!

Krem:
It's time that I showed a little initiative! I have the lobes for business. You just never give me the chance to prove it!

Ulis:
[commanding] Get back to work!

Krem:
[after a pause, subdued] Yes, cousin.

[the other Ferengi laugh derisively and leave]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to Krem] You... sure told him.

[the Ferengi are searching for Enterprise's "vault" in sickbay]

Muk:
Why would they keep a vault in the medical bay?

Ulis:
Rule of Acquisition number 23: "Nothing is more important than your health, except for your money."

[Archer and Tucker are staging a drama show for the Ferengi]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I'll show you the vault.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Trip?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Leave the women here, and I'll let you have the gold.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Not another word, Commander, that's an order!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I'm not letting 'em take my wife!

Ulis:
Wife?

Krem:
She's not the one with the pointy ears, is she?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
No. Her name's Hoshi. And you're gonna keep your filthy hands off her! Do we have a deal?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You take them anywhere near that vault and I'll throw you in the brig for insubordination.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You don't give a damn about this crew. All you care about is your precious gold.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm warning you, Trip.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You're a greedy son of a b*tch!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What's your wife worth? Five bars of gold, maybe six? Let them take Hoshi, and I'll give you ten.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
All right, fifteen!

[Tucker charges at Archer with a roar and continues the discussion in a brawl]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Sorry, fellas. Bank must be closed today.

[after all Ferengi have been put out of commission]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
"Not that interesting"? "No sense of humor"? "Always complaining"?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
...I'll make it up to you.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
How?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Five bars of gold?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[trying to entice Krem] I'll take you to the vault. We'll split the gold, 50-50. I'll even throw in [pause] the Vulcan female.

Krem:
How do I know you won't try to double-cross me?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You're the one holding the gun. So... what'll it be?

Krem:
[ponders, then holds up gun] Get back to work.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It's your loss.

[Phlox and Sato are leaving Madame Chang's Mandarin Cafe]

Dr. Phlox:
There are a lot of Starfleet people here.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
That's probably my fault. I told a few friends about the place.

Dr. Phlox:
A *few*?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I'm a comm officer. If there's one thing I know how to do, it's disseminate information.

Commander T'Pol:
Are you leaving because of me?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, Starfleet's approved the transfer.

Commander T'Pol:
You didn't answer my question.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[sighs] This may come as a shock; but not everything in my life revolves around you.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I was gettin' a little too comfortable on Enterprise. Got a lot of friends over there, but... sometimes it's easier to work with people who are just colleagues.

[on the reason why he accepted the transfer to Columbia]

Captain Erika Hernandez:
Commander - drop by the quartermaster's at the end of your shift.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Ma'am?

Captain Erika Hernandez:
Might wanna...

[she pats her Columbia badge]

Captain Erika Hernandez:
...update your uniform.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I don't know who's in charge of your mess hall, but he could give the chef on Enterprise a run for his money.

Captain Erika Hernandez:
I stole him from the Republic. Captain Jennings said I could have anything I wanted when I left. So I took his cook.

[Phlox has been abducted to work on an antiviral agent against a Klingon disease]

Dr. Phlox:
Why didn't you simply ask for our help? Starfleet and Denobula would have provided you with all the specialists you'd need.

Antaak:
You don't understand the Klingon way, Doctor. To ask for assistance would make us look weak in the eyes of our enemies. It could even incite rebellion.

Dr. Phlox:
We should contact the IME. They may have seen this mutation before. I'm certain they'll be willing to share their database with us. I know of a few... indirect channels. No one would have to know.

Antaak:
There's no reason to contact them. We've acquired their entire database.

[he hands Phlox a data rod]

Dr. Phlox:
You stole it.

Antaak:
Medical research isn't a priority for the High Council. I am forced to obtain information however I can.

Dr. Phlox:
That doesn't sound very honorable.

Antaak:
Given the choice between honor and saving lives, I choose the latter.

[a patient is brought into the lab]

Dr. Phlox:
When I asked you to bring me a subject for dissection, I assumed he'd already be dead.

General K'Vagh:
He won't be alive much longer.

[Antaak approaches the patient with a hypospray, but Phlox stops him]

Dr. Phlox:
What do you think you're doing?

Antaak:
Euthanizing him.

Dr. Phlox:
Out of the question! I thought you were committed to saving lives.

Antaak:
It is more honorable to give one's life to medical research than to die for no purpose!

Dr. Phlox:
That choice is not ours to make!

[K'Vagh draws his disrupter and shoots the patient]

General K'Vagh:
Proceed.

Antaak:
You must forgive the General's conduct. The warrior caste has little use for social protocols.

[Antaak's targ is nibbling at Phlox's leg]

Antaak:
Boshar! Feeding time is over. Go back!

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Phlox is my friend. Do you know where he is?

Harris:
We have an assignment for you.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I wasn't aware that I was still a part of your section.

Harris:
There's a job that needs doing, Lieutenant. It may be the only way to save your friend's life.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I'm being compromised, sir. And I don't like it.

Harris:
Then I suggest you adjust your comfort level, Lieutenant.

[in a barren, white environment]

Commander T'Pol:
Why are you here?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I was about to ask you the same thing. Is this a daydream?

Commander T'Pol:
I'm meditating. This is where I go in my mind.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well... I would have thought you'd pick a more interesting place. Like the beach, or... or one of those Fire Plains you showed me.

Commander T'Pol:
Please leave.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Exactly where am I supposed to go?

Commander T'Pol:
Away.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
This is *my* daydream. *You* go away!

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
How's it coming?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Could be better. Creating a stable warp field isn't easy when the laws of physics won't cooperate. The Cochrane Equation, it's not constant here. The problem's in the quantum variables. Every time I try to compensate, the spatial gradients get thrown out of whack. Either we get away from these anomalies, or we're gonna have to rewrite the book on warp theory. And I don't have to tell you how long it took Zefram Cochrane the first time around. -... - Now, where's Isaac Newton when you need him?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Every species we run into seems to be gunning for us. We might as well paint a giant bull's-eye on the hull.

[Tucker is complaining about sleeplessness, but doesn't want to spend too much time on neuropressure sessions with T'Pol]

Dr. Phlox:
There is another treatment that might be helpful.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
All right, what've you got?

[Phlox presents a jar with eel-like creatures]

Dr. Phlox:
Aldebaran mud leeches!

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[apprehensive] What am I supposed to do with them?

Dr. Phlox:
Place one on your chest and one on your abdomen an hour before going to bed. Their secretions act as a natural sedative. Oh, er, please, be careful to sleep on your back. If you roll over, you might anger them.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Maybe an hour a night with T'Pol isn't so bad.

Orgoth:
When a ship runs aground due to spatial distortions... it becomes an easy target. Our captain told us we wouldn't harm anyone. And we didn't - not at first. It takes time to learn to kill without remorse. You're not prepared to kill, or torture. Not yet.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I'm prepared to do whatever it takes to find your ship. And if that ends up causing me remorse... then it's something I'm willing to live with.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You'd better start talking now, because in about forty seconds, you won't be able to!

[after locking Orgoth in an airlock and decompressing it]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
We're taking you back to the sphere.

Orgoth:
So you have let your morality get in the way after all.

[he chuckles]

Orgoth:
Mercy is not a quality that will serve you well in the Expanse, Captain.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[of the Osaarian ship] Their ion trail's already started to decay. They're gonna be hard to find.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
We're gonna wait for them to find us, Travis.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
You finished rewriting the physics books?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I don't think I'll be taking home the Nobel Prize any time soon.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
This mission, whether it succeeds or not, is looking like a one-way ticket all the time.

[last lines]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Computer - load the Xindi database.

Commander Tucker:
I never got the impression you cared that much about Humans. Seems like... you were always finding something new to complain about.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
I lived on Earth for more than thirty years, Commander. In that time, I developed an affinity for your world and its people.

Commander Tucker:
You did a pretty good job of hiding it.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Thank you.

[Soval stands trial before the High Command]

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
My actions were taken in the best interest of Vulcan and the High Command.

Administrator V'Las:
Keeping secrets from us is in our best interest?

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Had I revealed my abilities as a melder, my years of service would not have been possible.

Minister Kuvak:
Your accomplishments have been noteworthy.

Administrator V'Las:
They don't justify deception.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Deception has never been a stranger to this room.

Administrator V'Las:
Is there anything else you'd like to say?

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
There's a great deal that needs to be said, Excellency. But no one is willing to listen.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm here to find the person who bombed the Earth embassy. Her name is T'Pau. And she looks a hell of a lot like you!

T'Pau:
You have a lot to learn about Syrrannites.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You have a lot to learn about Humans. We don't sit back and do nothing while our people are attacked!

T'Pau:
No, you traverse vast wastelands, based on false information.

Commander T'Pol:
Syrran melded with you before he died. What you're experiencing is the residue of his thoughts.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
So I'm suffering from... a mind meld hangover?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You know... I'm the one with the Vulcan ghost in his head - depending on who you believe. But... I don't feel half as bad as you look.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
At least we know your mother's okay.

Commander T'Pol:
She's joined a violent cult. She's not okay.

Commander T'Pol:
When you gave me that map, you knew I'd try to find you.

T'Les:
I thought that if you could see what we were trying to accomplish...

Commander T'Pol:
That I'd understand? That I'd join you?

T'Les:
I held out that hope, yes. It's possible I was being foolish.

Commander T'Pol:
Extremely.

[V'Las has told Tucker in no uncertain terms that Enterprise is to leave]

Administrator V'Las:
I've also contacted Admiral Gardner. I'm sure you'll be hearing from him soon. A pleasant journey.

[he disconnects]

Commander Tucker:
Son of a b*tch hung up on us!

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Should I try to get him back?

[V'Las has ordered to wipe out all the surviving Syrrannites, after bombing their sanctuary]

Minister Kuvak:
You're presiding over a massacre.

Administrator V'Las:
We are eliminating a threat.

T'Les:
[dying words] I've always been so proud of you, my T'Pol.

Surak:
You don't trust Vulcans, Captain. Given your experiences with them, I can't say I blame you. The culture you've come to know isn't the one I helped to create. My people have strayed, and someone must restore them to the path.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You've got the wrong man.

Surak:
Sorry, Captain. There is an Earth expression: we're stuck with each other. Don't fight what's been given to you. Open your mind and your heart, and the way will become clear.

Surak:
We cannot let what happened to the Vulcans of my time take place again. Find what my people have lost. Find the... Kir'Shara.

Degra:
It may seem odd to celebrate the completion of a weapon, particularly one designed to destroy an entire planet. But recall the words of Enarchis, written some fifty years into the Great Diaspora: "Without a world of our own, we are but children, lost in the wilderness." One day we'll emerge from this wilderness, and our work here will ensure... that we'll never be lost again. To a new era for all Xindi.

[Tucker and Mayweather are trying to figure out the controls of the Xindi shuttle]

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I think I found reverse.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Great. But unless we plan to fly in ass-first, we better figure out how to make it go forward.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Their flight path is somewhat erratic. [on Tucker's and Mayweather's first piloting attempt with the Xindi shuttle]

[Mayweather accidentally rams the Enterprise with the Xindi shuttle]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Sorry!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
No problem. I'll send you the bill.

[Mayweather is instructing Archer in flying the Xindi shuttle]

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
Good. You're starting to think like an Insectoid.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'll take that as a compliment.

Commander Dolim:
Patience is for the dead.

Commander Dolim:
Is this a preemptive strike?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I thought that was your specialty.

Commander Dolim:
You don't want to know my specialty.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Let me guess - stinking up the room!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'll bet you didn't know this; but at one time, most of my world was ruled by reptiles.

Commander Dolim:
I wasn't aware of that.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A comet hit, around 65 million years ago. Caused a mass extinction. Most of the reptiles died out. Mammals became the dominant species.

Commander Dolim:
How unfortunate.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Still, the reptiles might have come out on top, if it hadn't been for a slight disadvantage.

Commander Dolim:
And what was that?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
They had brains the size of a walnut. That's very small. Apparently, it's a constant in the universe.

Commander Dolim:
You want me to kill you?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Just making conversation.

Jannar:
Someone once said that dealing with Reptilians is like bargaining with the sun - you make no progress, and you come away burning.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
They're about to deploy their weapon.

Temporal Agent Daniels:
I know.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I can't let that happen!

Temporal Agent Daniels:
If you destroy their weapon, they will only build another. You are the only one who can convince them of what I have told you. It is crucial to history that you do not sacrifice yourself.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
My concern is with preventing the deaths of billions of people. If that's a problem for history, then history will have to suffer!

[Archer has refused to take a more diplomatic route in the conflict with the Xindi, whereupon Daniels hands him a family medal of a Xindi from the future]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Why're you giving this to me?

Temporal Agent Daniels:
In case you change your mind.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I won't.

Jannar:
The last time I saw you like this was when you delivered the first weapon.

Degra:
And that one only killed seven million. This one will destroy an entire world.

Jannar:
Better their world than ours.

Degra:
That's what I keep telling myself. But the reality is, a good number of the dead will be innocents. And children.

Jannar:
It's best not to think about it.

Degra:
That's difficult when you have children of your own.

Jannar:
What we do is for them - for our children's future. Remember that.

Degra:
I wonder how they'll... remember us.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to Degra] Listen to me, you son of a b*tch! It wasn't any easier for me to swallow this than it is for you, but you better understand something: if you destroy Earth, you won't just be eliminating my species; you'll be eliminating your own!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[referring to Daniels] He said you're the only one who can end the conflict with the Xindi. You can't do that if you're dead.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
That's if you accept Daniels' version of the future.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
He's in a position to know.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I thought you were the skeptical one when it came to time travel.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Our recent visit to Detroit has tempered my skepticism.

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
We can't forget who the real enemy is!

Degra:
We may not know who the real enemy is.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Dismissed.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Dismissed?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Get out.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I've always been much better at avoiding farewells than at giving them, so... I'm not even gonna try. But I'm going to ask all of you to think back to the day when this ship was first launched. We were explorers then. When all this is over, when Earth is safe, I want you to get back to that job. There're 400 billion stars in our galaxy. We've only explored a tiny fraction. You've a lot of work to do. Of all the captains who will sit in this chair, I can't imagine any of them being more proud than I am right now.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Give 'em hell, Captain.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I don't want you to die! - It's not necessary.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I wish that were true.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Let me speak to this Council of yours - present my case.

Degra:
Some members of the Council would sooner execute you than listen.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Then help me change their minds.

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
You haven't changed ours.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I've made an impression - or you wouldn't still be here.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
The food on this ship isn't fit for animals! That mangy pet of yours would probably taste better. You can either take me home or find a new chef, it's that simple. Oh, something else: I want new quarters.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Is that so?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
For one thing, my room is too small! There are plasma conduits running across the ceiling. It's noisy, it keeps me up all night!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Maybe you'd sleep better in the cargo bay.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
What did you say to me?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
This is a starship, not a luxury liner! If you're not satisfied with the accomodations, we can leave you behind in a shuttlepod; maybe you'll have better luck with whoever picks you up. And if you don't like Chef's food, don't eat it! From the looks of things, you should probably skip the dessert table while you're at it!

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[pauses, then smiles] That was a nice touch.

[starts laughing]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I can't believe I'm supposed to speak to their ambassador like that.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Tellarites always have a litany of complaints. It's how they start arguments with people they've just met.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Even if they have nothing to complain about?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
In that case, they'll just insult you. Whatever they say, you have to respond in kind, otherwise they'll take offense.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[scoffs] A species that actually thrives on arguing. They probably make good politicians. Thanks for the dry run.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Uh, sir - I wasn't kidding about Porthos.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You think he is mangy?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
No. But you might wanna keep him out of sight. Tellarites consider canines something of a, uh... delicacy.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You people are even uglier than I remember. Captain Jonathan Archer. Welcome aboard.

[to Ambassador Gral and his delegates upon their arrival on Enterprise]

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[after a conversation with a few Tellarites] You know, I like these people more 'n I thought I would. They don't hold anything back. It's refreshing. Speaking your mind for a change.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You don't feel free to speak your mind with the rest of us?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Now, you know what I mean.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[surly] No. Maybe you'd like to explain it to me.

[Tucker gives T'Pol a baffled look]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[gruffly] Why don't you change your uniform before you stink up the place?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[bewildered, then realizing] Ah, practicing your Tellarite. Y'know, I get it.

[Archer gives him a stern look. Tucker looks unsure, then walks out]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[smiles] When in Rome...

Commander T'Pol:
I beg your pardon?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Forget it.

Tellarite Ambassador Gral:
I'm told this ship is the pride of Starfleet. I find it small and unimpressive.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Funny. I was about to say the same thing about you.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A species that actually thrives on arguing. They probably make good politicians.

[Archer has to separate Shran and Gral, who are at each other's throat]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You wanna fight? I'll throw both of you in the brig! You can tear each other to pieces!

[Shran tells Archer about his relationship with Talas]

Commander Shran:
Andorian women are far more aggressive than Earth females. She made a... an overture. I had a choice - charge her with assaulting a superior or... mate with her.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Hope you made the right decision.

Lieutenant Talas:
[to MACO crewman] Andorian women are... permitted... one final conquest before their wedding. I've never had relations with a member of your species. I was hoping you'd indulge me.

MACO Crewman:
Go back to your quarters.

Lieutenant Talas:
You won't even consider it?

[the crewman knocks down Shran who has come from behind, before he himself is bashed up and floored by Talas]

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
So, I understand our First Officer's no longer married.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Yeah...?

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I was wondering what your intentions were.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, who are you, her father?

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
There's nothing going on between us anymore, if you're interested.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
That's not why I asked.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, you said she had an awfully nice bum.

[while on board an alien ship, Reed has lost most of his air supply]

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I'll try to get their life support online.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Right. With our luck, they probably breathe fluorine.

[in Archer's ready room]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
One other thing.

[Archer takes a small antique, wooden box from his desk]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
It's your first official day of duty, Commander T'Pol.

[he presents the box to her]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
A present.

[T'Pol opens the box]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
It's from the early 20th century.

[she takes out an antique compass and examines it]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Should help keep you pointed in the right direction. I'm glad you're with us.

Commander T'Pol:
[moved] Thank you, Captain.

Dr. Arik Soong:
Jonathan Archer. What brings you here? They naming the prison after you?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You programmed a PADD to unlock every security door in the building.

Dr. Arik Soong:
I was particularly proud of that. I made it all the way to Sausalito. On the rare occasion I get stuck on a problem, I find a vigorous escape attempt helps to... clear the head.

Dr. Arik Soong:
How can a supposedly intelligent species reject technology that would enhance ability, relieve suffering?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Genetic engineering has caused a lot of suffering.

Dr. Arik Soong:
So did splitting the atom. And yet the first ships to colonize the solar system were nuclear-powered. But... you're not here to discuss that.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
This is my Science Officer, T'Pol.

Dr. Arik Soong:
No need for an introduction.

Dr. Arik Soong:
[to T'Pol] I admire your people very much. We share a similar view of Humanity.

Commander T'Pol:
What view is that?

Dr. Arik Soong:
That it could stand some improvement.

Commander T'Pol:
I believe that's true of most species, if not all.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
[introducing] My Tactical Officer, Lieutenant Reed.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Doctor.

Dr. Arik Soong:
I've heard of you. But I don't recognize your face. You're not getting your fair share of publicity.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
We've prepared some quarters. You'll be under guard at all times - if you should decide you need to "clear your head".

Orion Slaver #1:
You are now the property of the Orion Syndicate. Break the rules and you will suffer. Follow the rules and you will suffer less.

Orion Slaver #1:
If you don't sell as a slave, I will sell you as food.

Orion Slaver #1:
[after T'Pol has been auctioned] Three million six! Not even my last wife sold for that much!

Commander T'Pol:
I'm not for sale!

[after kicking the Orion slaver in the crotch]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What kind of people are these?

Dr. Arik Soong:
I'd say they're not unlike some of your ancestors, judging from your accent.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, if I remember my history, these Augments you love so much had plenty of slaves.

Dr. Arik Soong:
They were more like subjects.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Huh. They were just treated like slaves.

Dr. Arik Soong:
[on genetic engineering] I didn't realize you shared Humanity's reactionary attitude toward this field of medicine.

Dr. Phlox:
On the contrary. We've used genetic engineering on Denobula for over two centuries, to generally positive effect.

Dr. Arik Soong:
But you don't approve of what I've done.

Dr. Phlox:
You tried to redesign your species. The first time that was attempted on Earth, the result was 30 million deaths.

Dr. Arik Soong:
We can't let past mistakes hold us back.

Dr. Phlox:
It's your responsibility as a scientist to learn from past mistakes.

Malik:
We don't care what happens to you. Humanity is no longer relevant. To quote one of your philosophers, Nietzsche: "Mankind is something to be surpassed."

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You think he was talking about you?

Persis:
[referring to Malik] He said that you are weak. That you're making all of us weak. That you're betraying Father's principles, that, if Father were here, he'd choose Malik to lead us.

Raakin:
I *will* betray Father's principles. I'm going to kill my own brother!

Malik:
There was a time... when I looked up to you. When I called you my brother.

Raakin:
I *am* your brother.

Malik:
When you rejected our father's wishes, you stopped being one of us. And when that happened... you ceased to exist.

[he stabs Raakin]

Malik:
Which makes this an act of mercy.

Dr. Arik Soong:
It's been a pleasure, Captain. Take my advice: go home and start learning how to speak Klingon.

[last lines]

Dr. Arik Soong:
[to his Augments] There were times, back on Earth, when I doubted myself. My work. But seeing you all... I know that everything I've fought for was worth it. We're going to build a new world. But we can't begin that task just yet. Thousands of your brothers and sisters are waiting to be born. Let's go get them.

[Enterprise is approaching the Berengaria system]

Commander T'Pol:
A Vulcan science vessel surveyed the seventh planet over 50 years ago. The file states it's an M-class world with a flourishing ecosystem. No intelligent life.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Sounds promising.

Commander T'Pol:
They did report one distinctive feature which bears mentioning.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
And that is?

Commander T'Pol:
A species of flying reptile, some reportedly over 200 meters long. They're also said to breathe fire.

[the crew's expressions become a mixture of curiosity and skepticism]

Commander T'Pol:
There's been lingering questions over the accuracy of this report.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[suppressing a grin] We can't wait to find out.

[Archer and Reed have been invited to a snack on Harrad-Sar's ship]

Harrad-Sar:
You have acquired something of a reputation, Captain.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Favorable, I hope?

Harrad-Sar:
Well, you're wanted in the Klingon Empire, the Orion Syndicate... I don't know, I-I would've imagined such a man would have a more robust appetite.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
With all those people after me, I need to stay quick on my feet.

[Harrad-Sar has scantily-clad Orion slave girls brought in for Archer's and Reed's entertainment]

Harrad-Sar:
What do you think?

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
[fascinated] I can't think.

Harrad-Sar:
Captain?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'd have to agree with my Tactical Officer.

Harrad-Sar:
Incredible, aren't they? They can make you forget most of your troubles. Of course, creatures such as these come with troubles of their own. But women are the same throughout the galaxy, aren't they?

Commander Tucker:
Try to divert some of the power from the grav-plating! [to the crew] We're gonna be a little lighter on our feet! [to himself] What the hell, I've been meaning to lose a few pounds.

Commander T'Pol:
I've been hearing some concerns from the crew.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Concerns?

Commander T'Pol:
The Orion women. Their presence is becoming disruptive.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You're telling me. The crew isn't used to having Orions on board.

Commander T'Pol:
It's more than that. Our guests visited the mess hall this morning. As a result, twelve crewmen reported late for their shifts.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I get the picture.

Commander T'Pol:
It's primarily their attire.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Or lack of it!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Any chance to improve relations with the Syndicate, I'm willing to take that risk. Anything to have one less hostile species out there.

[Sato consults Dr. Phlox about a headache]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
It's probably just stress.

Dr. Phlox:
Plenty of that going around.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Or it could be our new passengers.

Dr. Phlox:
The Orion females? Why should they give you a headache?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I'm just not used to seeing guys trip over themselves like that.

Dr. Phlox:
Oh, just a little healthy sexual energy. Helps keep the blood pumping.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
If you ask me, it's pumping a little too hard.

[Mayweather is lifting heavy weights to forget about the Orion women]

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
When I was on my parents' ship, we picked up some Deltans once. Their ship was having engine trouble.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I don't know that species.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
The females are unbelievably attractive. Very open about...

[he succumbs to the strain]

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I was fifteen. I couldn't think straight. Could barely breathe. Only thing that got me through it was weight training with my dad. He said if I was exhausted, idle hands and all that.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Well, did it help?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
Helped my biceps.

Harrad-Sar:
Can I be of help, Captain? Do you need a tow?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We still have weapons. You're not gonna get this ship without one hell of a fight!

Harrad-Sar:
I'd rather I didn't have to kill you, but... if that's what it takes. The Syndicate wants your head, Captain; and they don't really care whether or not it's attached to your body.

Navaar:
I can see you're not very experienced at making threats.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm a lot better at carrying them out.

Harrad-Sar:
I can see you're upset, and I sympathize. But it's truly out of my hands. We're both slaves to the situation.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
...They control you?

Harrad-Sar:
You finally realize that. Yes, Captain, you've been operating under a misconception. It is the men who are the slaves, not the women.

Navaar:
Please, release us.

[Archer's hand moves toward the button to open the doors]

Commander T'Pol:
Captain!

[Archer comes to his senses at the last second]

Navaar:
I'm obviously not the only woman with power over you.

[T'Pol has told Tucker that they share a psychic bond]

Commander Tucker:
So, if we're bonded... what does this have to do with me not being affected by the Orions?

Commander T'Pol:
I'm immune to the pheromones because of my Vulcan physiology.

Commander Tucker:
And you're making me immune?

Commander T'Pol:
Apparently.

Commander Tucker:
Well... I don't know whether to be relieved or... really worried.

Navaar:
Commander Tucker. I'm impressed. I'm beginning to see who's the true master of this vessel.

Commander Tucker:
Oh, save it. Captain Archer runs this ship. You're sweet-talking the wrong guy.

Commander T'Pol:
At least we've learned something about the Orions.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Yeah, the women are in charge!

Commander T'Pol:
It proves that even the most disagreeable species have some... positive attributes.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It almost sounded like you were making a joke.

Commander Tucker:
At least trying to make one.

Commander T'Pol:
I assure you, if I ever decide to make a joke, you'll know about it.

Commander Tucker:
There it is again.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
T'Pol, if I didn't know better, I'd think you were picking up some of Trip's bad habits.

Subcommander T'Pol:
[when Phlox denies her sexual advances] You have no idea what you're denying yourself.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm hungry.

Dr. Phlox:
Our meals will be here soon.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I wasn't referring to food.

Subcommander T'Pol:
You don't find me attractive?

Dr. Phlox:
Of course I do. But that is not the issue.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[about Tellarites] T'Pol says they're not the most agreeable species. Apparently they enjoy a good argument. It's considered a sport on their planet.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I've got an old girlfriend this guy might like to meet.

Skalaar:
My brother and I were hauling a shipment of fire salt. I thought I could trim two or three days off our journey by cutting across the most insignificant corner of Klingon space. I learned very quickly there's no such thing as an insignificant corner of Klingon space.

Klingon Captain Goroth:
The Empire never forgets its enemies!

[Skalaar has captured Archer to turn him over to the Klingons, when his ship is damaged]

Skalaar:
Our reactor's leaking. The warp drive's offline. I'm never going to make the rendezvous.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Isn't that a shame.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You don't care that you're sending an innocent man to his death?

Skalaar:
I've captured dozens of fugitives. Every one of them claimed to be an innocent man.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
If the Klingons wanted them, they probably were.

Skalaar:
I'm sure you're not a bad person. Just an unlucky one.

[T'Pol is suffering from pon farr]

Subcommander T'Pol:
You have the cure. It's unethical for you to withhold it, Doctor.

Dr. Phlox:
This mating cycle of yours was artificially induced. We can't be certain that a... physical encounter would help.

Subcommander T'Pol:
I'm willing to try.

[T'Pol has been cured]

Subcommander T'Pol:
Did I do anything inappropriate?

Dr. Phlox:
I've had patients treat me far worse.

Subcommander T'Pol:
Did we?

Dr. Phlox:
Oh, Denobulan males aren't comfortable discussing such topics.

[last lines]

Skalaar:
Be careful, Captain. It's likely the Klingons will double their bounty.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I hope you won't be the one to collect it.

Skalaar:
No promises.

[Archer has suggested to invite Captain Vanik on board Enterprise]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Dinner's a good way to break the ice. I was hoping you might give Chef some menu suggestions.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Certainly.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A little food, a little wine...

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Vulcans don't drink wine.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You know what I mean. Just help me make him go away.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[about pecan pie] May not be good for the body, but it sure is good for the soul.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I've only seen snow twice in my life.

[on the prospect of taking a sample from an icy comet]

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I hope I never see snow again.

[on the prospect of breaking through a cracked ice layer]

Vulcan Captain Vanik:
I hope our presence here is not proving inconvenient.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
On the contrary. It's nice to know, no matter how big the universe is, there's always a Vulcan ship nearby!

[Tucker has decided to tell T'Pol that he'd accidentally read a personal letter of hers]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You might want to take a phase pistol with you.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I might need one.

[T'Pol asks Tucker's advice on whether she should accept a prearranged marriage on Vulcan or stay on Enterprise]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What do *you* wanna do?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
That is irrelevant.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
No, it's not, it's very relevant. Do you wanna go back and marry this guy, spend a year with him, ten years, a hundred years, or do you wanna stay on Enterprise?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I have an obligation.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You've got an obligation to yourself. You spent the last year around Humans. If there's one thing you shoulda learned, it's that we're free to make our own decisions. There's a lot to be said for personal choice.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I respect your customs. But this marriage was arranged when you were a kid. A lot's happened since then. People change.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Vulcans don't.

[Archer is reluctant to accept Vanik's help to save Reed and Mayweather out of an emergency situation]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Vanik expects you to refuse his offer. He sees Humans as arrogant, prideful. Why not prove him wrong? You can save them, or you can let your pride stand in the way. You're Human; you're free to choose.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Did it ever occur to you that you might have postponed the wedding because subconsciously you wanted to get out of it?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
That would imply that my subconscious mind controls my decisions. It doesn't.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
It happens to Humans all the time. Maybe you're picking up some of our bad habits.

[last lines]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Captain, with your permission, I'd like to transmit a message to the Ti'Mur, to send to Vulcan.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Go right ahead.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Thank you.

[T'Pol and Tucker exchange a look, then she leaves]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What was that all about?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
It's personal.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm sure you're eager to get back to your ship, so I'll trouble you with just one last question: how long do you plan on spying on us?

Vulcan Captain Vanik:
If we were... "spying", Captain, you would have never detected our presence. Your inexperience and your arrogance are your enemies, not us.

Dr. Zefram Cochrane:
On this site, a powerful engine will be built - an engine that will someday help us to travel a hundred times faster than we can today. Imagine it: thousands of inhabited planets at our fingertips. And we'll be able to explore those strange new worlds, and seek out new life, and new civilizations. This engine will let us go boldly, where no man has gone before.

Henry Archer:
[to his son] You can't be afraid of the wind. Learn to trust it.

[first lines]

Young Archer:
"Where no man has gone before."

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
Jon. I think you know everyone.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
[noticing Klaang in the intensive care unit] Not everyone.

Admiral Daniel Leonard:
It's a Klingot.

Vulcan Attach? Tos:
A Kling-on.

[Archer is trying to coax Sato into joining his crew as Communications Officer, with a recording of Klingon language]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
What do you know about these... Klingons?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Not much. An empire of warriors - with eighty poly-guttural dialects constructed on an adaptive syntax.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[referring to the recording] Turn it up.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Think of it. You'd be the first Human to talk to these people. Do you really want someone else to do it?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I'm sorry to take you away from your program, but... our doctors haven't even heard of a Klingon.

Dr. Phlox:
Please, no apologies! What better time to study Human beings than when they're under pressure?

[Admiral Forrest is speculating about Klaang's purpose on Earth]

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
Ambassador Soval thinks it would be best if we push off your launch until we've cleared this up.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Well, isn't that a surprise. You'd think they would've come up with something a little more imaginative this time.

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
We may need to defer to their judgment.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
We've been deferring to their judgment for a hundred years!

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
Jon.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
How much longer?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Until you've proven you're ready.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Ready to what?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
To look beyond your provincial attitudes and your volatile nature.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Volatile? You have no idea how much I'm restraining myself from knocking you on your ass.

Dr. Phlox:
Optimism, Captain!

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Listen to me, you're making a mistake!

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
When your logic doesn't work, you raise your voice? You've been on Earth too long.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[about the transporter] I heard this platform's been approved for bio-transport.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I presume you mean fruits and vegetables.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I mean Armory officers and helmsmen.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
No doubt Mr. Tucker will reassure me that my equipment will be here tomorrow. "Keep your shirt on, Lieutenant."

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Pardon me, but if I don't realign the deflector, the first grain of space dust we come across will blow a hole through this ship the size of your fist.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Keep your shirt on, Lieutenant. Your equipment'll be here in the morning.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[on the prospect of having T'Pol on board Enterprise] I don't know. I'd be more comfortable with Porthos on the bridge.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[introducing himself] Trip. I'm called Trip.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I'll try to remember that.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
While you may not share our enthusiasm about this mission, I expect you to follow our rules. What's said in this room and out on that bridge is privileged information. I don't want every word I say being picked apart the next day by the Vulcan High Command.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
My reason for being here is not espionage. My superiors simply asked me to assist you.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Your superiors don't think we can flush a toilet without one of you to assist us.

Admiral Maxwell Forrest:
When Zefram Cochrane made his legendary warp flight ninety years ago, and drew the attention of our new friends, the Vulcans, we realized that we weren't alone in the galaxy. Today, we are about to cross a new threshold. For nearly a century, we've waded ankle-deep in the ocean of space. Now it's finally time to swim.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Take her out, Mr. Mayweather. Straight and steady.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
Have you ever slept in zero G?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Slept?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[nods] It's just like being back in the womb.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I've heard the women on Draylax have...

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[nods] Three. That's true.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You know that first-hand?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
First-hand, second-hand... third-hand...

Dr. Phlox:
[about his Altarian marsupial] Their droppings contain the greatest concentration of regenerative enzymes found anywhere.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Their "droppings"?

Dr. Phlox:
If you're going to try to embrace new worlds, you must try to embrace new ideas.

[Archer and Phlox are discussing Klaang, who is lying unconscious in sickbay]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Ensign Mayweather tells me that we'll be to Qo'noS in about eighty hours. Any chance he'll be conscious by then?

Dr. Phlox:
There's a chance he'll be conscious within the next ten minutes. Just not a very good one.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[translating Klaang's Klingon talk] He s... he says his... his wife has grown ugly?

[Klaang is shouting in Klingon]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Do you know how to tell him to shut up?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[to Klaang] SHUT UP!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Perhaps you'd like to go to your quarters and lie down.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Ponfo mirann.

[Vulcan insult]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I was instructed to speak English on this voyage. And I'd appreciate it if you'd respect that.

[T'Pol is attempting clumsily to cut a bread stick with a fork]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
It might be a little easier using your fingers.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Vulcans don't touch food with their hands.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Can't wait to see you tackle the spare ribs.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
It remains to be seen whether Humanity will revert to its baser instincts.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, we used to have cannibals on Earth. Who knows how far we'll revert? Lucky this isn't a long mission.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Human instinct is pretty strong. You can't expect us to change overnight.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
With proper discipline...

[she finally manages to cut a clean piece off her breadstick and holds it up with her fork]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
...anything's possible.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
That's... never happened before.

[when Sarin changes her appearance after kissing Archer]

[Klaang has been abducted out of sickbay by Suliban, a stealth-capable race]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
We've got state-of-the-art sensors. Why the hell didn't we detect them?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
Mr. Reed thought he detected something right before we lost power.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
The starboard sensor logs recorded a spatial disturbance.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Looks more like a glitch.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Those weren't glitches in sickbay.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[arguing with T'Pol about Archer] I realize he's only a simple Earthling; but did it ever occur to you that he might know what he's doin'? It's no secret Starfleet hasn't been around too long. God knows you remind us of that every chance you get. But does that mean the man who's been put in charge of this mission doesn't deserve our support? Then again, loyalty's an emotion - isn't it?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I can't isolate Human bio-signs. They could be anywhere in the complex.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Try Vulcan bio-signs.

[at that moment, there is a knock on the shuttlepod's window - from T'Pol]

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I found her!

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Neptune and back in six minutes.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[Last lines] I'm readin an ion storm on that trajectory, sir. Should I go around it?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Can't be afraid of the wind, Ensign. Take us to warp 4.

Klaang:
RaQo jadICH!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I don't particularly like the way you smell, either!

[In a futile attempt to shoot Archer while in the temporal chamber, Silik is knocked down by the subsequent temporal shock wave]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What's the matter? No genetic tricks to keep you from gettin' knocked on your butt?

[Enterprise has taken Klaang safely home]

Klingon Chancellor:
ChugDah hegh. Volcha va.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[aside, to Sato] I'll take that as a thank you.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I don't think they have a word for 'thank you'.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What did he say?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
You don't wanna know.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Ever since I can remember, I've seen... Vulcans as an obstacle. Always keeping us from standing on our own two feet.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I understand.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
No, I don't think you do. If I'm gonna pull this off, there're a few things I need to leave behind. Things like... preconceptions, holding grudges. This mission would've failed without your help.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I won't dispute that.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I was thinking. A Vulcan science officer could come in handy. But if I asked you to stay, it might look like I wasn't ready to do this on my own.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Perhaps you should add pride to your list.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Perhaps I should.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
It might be best if I were to contact my superiors and make the request myself. With your permission.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Permission granted.

[Last Lines]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I hope nobody is in a big hurry to get home. Starfleet seems to think that we're ready to begin our mission. I understand there's an inhabited planet a few light years from here.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
We've detected it, sir. Sensors show a nitrogen sulfide atmosphere.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Probably not humanoids?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
That's what we're here to find out. Prepare to break orbit, and lay in a course.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I'm reading an ion storm on that trajectory, sir. Should I go around it?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We can't be afraid of the wind, Ensign. Take us to warp four.

Zoumas:
Have you ever tried Tojal?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What?

Zoumas:
There's nothing like it. But you have to eat it before it cools, otherwise it'll congeal.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[unenthusiastic] Sounds terrific.

Zoumas:
It's the first thing I'm gonna have when we're off this ship. - Where d'you think they're taking us?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Ask him.

[Zoumas looks doubtfully at the Nausicaan guard]

Zoumas:
I'll just wait and see. - The Enolians won't stop looking for us; we'll be fugitives. I was thinking of having my face reconfigured. There's a surgeon on Burala Prime who can do it. He can help you as well.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I'll take my chances with my own face.

Zoumas:
Have you ever been to Burala Prime?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Can't say I have.

Zoumas:
If you ever go, avoid the polar islands. The people are friendly, but the cold is unbearable, nothing but ice and glaciers. I was stranded there for three months when some colleagues of mine decided to leave without me.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Imagine that.

Zoumas:
The day I got lost, that was the worst. Fourteen hours, it took me fourteen hours to find my way back to the outpost. I lost three toes to frostbite. I've walked with a slight limp ever since; not that you notice. I'm gonna get that surgeon to do some work on my foot as well; maybe he can replace the missing toes...

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[to the Nausicaan] Excuse me - can I change seats?

[the Nausicaan is replacing Tucker's restraints]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Is this really necessary? I just saved your skin and you still don't trust me. Do you know how much power flows through those plasma circuits?

Zoumas:
[interjecting] How much?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
A lot. I could have been electrocuted. Hell, the least you could do is say 'thanks'.

Nausicaan:
[sneering] Thanks.

[walks away]

Zoumas:
That was nice. It reminds me of the time I was on...

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Shut up!

[the guards are giving out some sort of oatmeal]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Anything else on the menu?

Nausicaan:
If you don't like it, give it to me.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I like it just fine.

Nausicaan:
Give it to me.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Eat your own.

Nausicaan:
You don't listen too well.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Then why don't you save yourself the trouble and stop talking to me?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Hopefully there'll be a judge or... someone on that processing station we can talk to.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
And if not?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You might wanna make friends with that Nausicaan.

Kuroda Lor-ehn:
You're a pilot?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A damn good one. I'm a smuggler, remember?

Kuroda Lor-ehn:
The guard said... you were going to be released. Why?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Because we're innocent. I have friends who wanted to keep doing business with me. They made a few discreet payments, and now... I'm innocent.

Kuroda Lor-ehn:
I may not know how to fly this ship. But I'm sure I can figure out how to crash it.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We can't wait for Enterprise. We've got to try to take control.

[he shoots a glance at the Nausicaan]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Think you can handle him?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Yeah, piece of cake.

[last lines]

Enolian Official:
Captain, my superiors will want a report on what happened...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'll give you one right now: Kuroda's dead, the other eleven prisoners are under guard. As you're aware, my Engineer and I were falsely arrested. We almost wound up in Canamar. Makes me wonder how many others don't belong there. You wanted a report? You've got one.

Kuroda Lor-ehn:
[referring to Canamar] I won't go back!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
You'd like me to tell you a story?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Just how old are you?

[T'Pol does not answer]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
It's got to be in her record.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Trip - that's classified information.

[Mestral tries to persuade T'Mir to let him play pool against Billy]

Mestral:
The game is based on simple geometry. It wouldn't challenge a Vulcan child.

T'Mir:
No!

Mestral:
We need their currency.

T'Mir:
What if you lose? I'll have to... socialize with him.

[Mestral shoots a glance at Billy]

Mestral:
Would you rather die of starvation?

Maggie:
What are you hiding under that cap? A pointed head? You're not from Mars, are you?

Stron:
This is the third time this week I've had to fix Mrs. Garrett's sink.

Mestral:
Perhaps she enjoys your company.

Stron:
It might be tolerable if her son didn't insist on calling me... Moe.

T'Mir:
Why does he do that?

Stron:
There is a comic actor known as a Stooge with that name. The boy believes we have similar hair.

Mestral:
There is a resemblance.

Mestral:
This antenna is inadequate. I believe I can use a waveform discriminator to enhance it.

T'Mir:
It'll be safer to go after dark. Can't risk being followed.

Mestral:
I need to go now. "I Love Lucy" is on tonight.

Jack:
[to Mestral] Want to shoot some eight-ball?

Maggie:
Jack!

Jack:
I've got a geometry midterm next week; it's good practice.

Maggie:
I'm sorry. I... I'm usually better at keeping a lid on my emotions. It's, it's not always easy.

Mestral:
I know.

T'Mir:
You're to have no further contact with that woman.

Mestral:
You can't make that decision.

T'Mir:
I'm still in command.

Mestral:
Command of what? Our mission is over. It's time to accept the fact that we may never leave this world.

Mestral:
It's unfortunate that you'll be leaving these people without experiencing one thing they have to offer.

Stron:
Such as? Alcohol? Frozen fish sticks? The constant threat of nuclear annihilation?

Maggie:
Nothing like an atomic test to make your day.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[after the story] Do you realize you've just rewritten our history books?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
A footnote at best.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Footnote? This is like finding out Neil Armstrong wasn't the first man to walk on the moon!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Perhaps he wasn't.

[Tucker groans]

Drive-thru voicebox:
Welcome to Burgerland. How may I serve you today?

Loomis:
I'll have the Double Superbeef, no lettuce.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to voicebox] One Double Superbeef without lettuce, please.

Drive-thru voicebox:
You can make that a triple for only 40? extra.

Loomis:
Do it.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to voicebox] A double will be fine.

Drive-thru voicebox:
Would you like to make that a combo?

Loomis:
[to voicebox] Yeah, fries and a medium root beer.

Drive-thru voicebox:
Will there be anything else today?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A hamburger, ketchup only.

Drive-thru voicebox:
You can make that a double for only 40? extra.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
No, thank you.

Drive-thru voicebox:
Would you like to make that a combo?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
No, no combo.

Drive-thru voicebox:
Will there be anything else today?

[Archer turns to T'Pol. She leans over to read the menu]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[to voicebox] Does the Fiesta Salad contain animal products?

Drive-thru voicebox:
No, but we can add three strips of bacon for only 75? more.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[disgusted] Nothing for me, thank you.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Sure?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Quite.

[Archer is about to drive off in a 'borrowed' car]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Have you ever operated a vehicle from this period?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I can pilot a starship.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
We just traveled 90 light years back to Earth.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
And 150 years into the past.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Forgive me if I'm not entirely convinced.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You will be.

[Loomis is discussing with T'Pol the conditions of his release if Archer catches the Xindi]

Loomis:
I'm taking a big chance here, okay? If your associate doesn't catch them, they're gonna come looking for me, okay? You two better keep your word.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
You've been abducting people for money, and you're questioning our honesty?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[referring to Loomis] In one individual we've managed to find the worst qualities of this era: greed, violence, moral corruption.

[Archer is taking out money from a 21st-century ATM using 22nd-century technology]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
People used to go to jail for this.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
We'll return what we don't use.

[Archer is interrogating Loomis, who is tied to a chair but not very cooperative]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to T'Pol] Untie him.

Loomis:
You heard him. Untie me.

[T'Pol complies]

Loomis:
That's better.

[Archer punches Loomis in the face, sending him crashing to the floor, then puts him back on the chair and has him tied up again]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It didn't feel right doing that with you tied up. Carpenter Street!

Loomis:
You're not allowed to hit me.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Untie him again...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
How did this "doctor" find you?

Loomis:
I told you, I work at the blood bank. He wanted someone from every blood type - eight blood types, eight people. He figured I had access to that kind of information.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Did he also figure that you'd have no compunctions about abducting people?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What's he paying you?

Loomis:
5,000 a piece, double for the last three.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[to Archer] Is that what human life is worth in the 21st century?

Xindi-Reptilian:
[to Archer] We won't allow you to destroy us. Your species is doomed!

Strode:
This gonna take long? I don't wanna miss Conan.

[last lines]

Loomis:
Those creatures, the lizard-people - they're around here somewhere. You gotta find them.

Officer #2:
Yeah, no problem, we'll get right on that.

Loomis:
Be careful. Be careful, they got ray guns.

Officer #2:
Yeah, ray guns, got it.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I don't like pushing the engines this hard. The injectors are running 110 percent.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
They're rated for 120.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Yeah, and my underwear is flame-retardant. That doesn't mean I'm gonna light myself on fire to prove it.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Obviously I'm here at the request of the Andorians. Shran believes he can trust me. I don't intend to prove him wrong by going down there, with a Vulcan officer in tow. If you insist I bring a Vulcan along, I'll take the one I know *I* can trust.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[just before the shuttle crashes] We need to reduce our speed.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
The ground is gonna do that for us.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[about her position on Enterprise] I find the work gratifying.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Gratification is an emotional indulgence. You disagreed with our recommendation that Archer's mission be canceled after the tragedy at Paraaga II. Why?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I was on board Enterprise at the time. I felt my opinion would be welcomed.

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
You believed you knew better than the High Command? That sounds a great deal like another emotion: arrogance. Perhaps it's time for you to consider another assignment.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Just because Captain Archer has earned my respect doesn't mean I've been contaminated by his emotions.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I believe someone once defined a compromise as... a solution that neither side is happy with.

Commander Shran:
In that case, these talks have been extremely successful.

Commander Shran:
Join me - in a drink to celebrate our mutual dissatisfaction.

[when being shot at, Archer leaves the Vulcans behind to reconnoiter]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
No offense, but my ears are less likely to draw fire than yours.

[disappears]

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
What is their fixation with our ears?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I believe they're envious.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
T'Pol said that territorial compromise they were talking about... took eight years to work out.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I'll try to speed things up this time.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
We wanna be involved in any rescue operation.

Muroc:
We have more experience in these matters.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I know. I once saw one of your commando units blast the hell out of a rebel compound during a rescue mission.

Dr. Phlox:
I served as a medic in the Denobulan Infantry. If I learned anything from that experience, it's that battlefields are unpredictable places - even under a flag of truce.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
The ball's in your court now.

[Soval looks inquiringly at T'Pol]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
It's a Human expression. It means the next move is yours.

[last lines]

Vulcan Ambassador Soval:
Captain - your presence here has not been... overly meddlesome.

[he leaves]

Commander Shran:
I think he likes you, pink skin.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I wouldn't go that far.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I imagined my first diplomatic mission would involve sitting around a big table, toasting with champagne, signing things with lots of pens...

Commander Shran:
The pink skin sense of humor.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Maybe we're not out here to just... scan comets and meet new species. Maybe... we're out here to prove that... Humanity's ready to join a much larger community. I intend to do that - whether the Vulcans like it or not.

Commander Shran:
To the cease-fire.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
We've determined that there are 59 spheres in the Expanse.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
I think your estimates are a bit low.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
That's doubtful.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
With the Makers there is no doubt.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Doubt is the basis of all scientific progress.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
Scientific progress has led many people to stray.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
The Maker's breath - it reshapes reality, allows ordinary men a glimpse of the divine.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
That "breath" nearly destroyed your ship.

[one of Archer's crew members has been killed in an explosion caused by one of the Triannons]

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
I also lost a crewman in that explosion, Captain. I'll say a prayer for them both.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[under his breath] Save your breath.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
How many people do you intend to kill with my ship?

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
[chuckles] Your species is obsessed with numbers - a characteristic of your misguided belief that the secrets of the universe can be revealed through science. This may sound barbaric to you, but it doesn't matter how many heretics die. When the Makers return, only the faithful will survive. Non-believers will be swept away. Not only Triannons, but every race within the Chosen Realm.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Doctrines like that make it... real easy to wipe out everyone who doesn't agree with you.

Yarrick:
D'Jamat is my spiritual leader. I will follow him to my death.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
From what I've seen, I'm pretty sure you're gonna have that opportunity.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A war - that was the "glorious mission" you were talking about?

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
I'm trying to save my people.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Why do I have the feeling these heretics would say the same thing?

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
They might very well. But it doesn't change what they are: enemies of the truth.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Your truth.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
There's only one.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You wanted to kill someone? Kill me.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
As long as people like D'Jamat dictate what's true and what isn't... all you'll ever have is war.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
In the service of the Makers, all actions are blessed ones.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
These people you're fighting - what makes them heretics?

Yarrick:
We believe the Makers created the Chosen Realm in nine days. They believe it took ten.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[scoffs] For that you've been at war for over a century?

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
When you begin to sympathize with the enemy, you risk becoming the enemy.

Dr. Phlox:
There'll be an extra helping of snow beetles for you tonight, young lady.

[after his Pyrithian bat has successfully distracted the guard]

[Archer has retaken control of the ship]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to the Triannons] We've also neutralized your organic explosives.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
You're lying!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Go ahead. Try to blow yourself up. I'll wait.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
You've done a terrible thing, Captain. You've interfered with something that was ordained. After centuries of fighting, I was going to bring an end to the war; we would have had peace!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Peace? One of my crewmen is dead, six others are wounded, my ship is damaged.

Pri'Nam D'Jamat:
None of that is important! All that matters is the sacred truth.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You want truth? I'll show you some truth.

[last lines]

[Archer shows D'Jamat his planet, which lies entirely in ruins]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
From what we've been able to learn, this happened eight months ago. Both sides have been decimated. There are no major cities left. Millions... are dead. Your faith was going to bring peace? Here it is.

[Archer is being briefed by T'Pol on several phenomena the crew has detected, all of which seem rather uninteresting]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
There is one other thing might be worth swinging by to take a look: a Minshara class planet, about four and a half light years away.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Any life signs?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Only about 500 million.

[Archer laughs in disbelief]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
If our scans are right, it looks like there's a whole civilization down there.

[all Humans laugh with excitement]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to T'Pol] You might have put that on the top of the list!

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A farm?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
It's remote and sparsely populated. If you're exposed, there's a reduced risk of cultural contamination.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
This must be why aliens are always landing in cornfields.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Seventy-eight light years to get here and our first act is breaking and entering.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Maybe you don't have to mention this part in your log.

Garos:
Welcome. If I don't have what you're looking for, I'm certain I can find someone who does.

[Archer has introduced T'Pol to Riann]

Riann:
You two are from the same province?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Not exactly.

Riann:
Must be difficult to make friends when you keep so much to yourself.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm sorry, I don't mean to be evasive.

Riann:
Yes, you do.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
The longer you remain, the more you risk cultural contamination.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
These people are suffering from something a lot worse than cultural contamination. We've got to find out what it is.

Garos:
You're not from this province, are you?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[scanning Garos] No. And neither are you. Your DNA doesn't match any other life form on this planet.

[Garos takes out a scanning device of his own to check out Archer]

Garos:
Nor does yours.

Dr. Phlox:
Isn't it extraordinary? Thousands of sentient species in our little corner of the cosmos, each one discovering science in their own unique way.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We're trying to help these people. What you're doing here is contaminating their water supply.

Garos:
There are 500 million Akaali on this planet. A few thousand won't be missed.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Let's try not to shoot anyone else while we're here, okay?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I'll try.

[after T'Pol has stunned Riann]

Riann:
Is there anything else you'd like to tell me, Jon?

[after finding out about Archer and the Malurian being aliens to her homeworld]

[last lines]

Riann:
Where's your starship headed now?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
There're lots of inhabited planets to see. But I doubt many'll be this memorable.

[he kisses her]

Riann:
Is your translator broken again?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm sorry? I... don't understand a word you're saying.

[they kiss again]

Captain Archer:
If you enjoy the simple life so much, why do you have an antimatter reactor in your basement?

Vissian Captain Drennik:
"There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Where'd you hear that?

Vissian Captain Drennik:
Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5. Your communications officer was kind enough to provide us with some of your literature. I assumed you approved.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Absolutely. But I didn't think you'd be quoting it the next day.

[Archer is preparing for an exploration trip with the Vissian captain]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
These people are fascinating, T'Pol, they have a lot to offer us... This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship! - Which reminds me... They've asked us for a sampling of films. I put together a few suggestions.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I'll see to it.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[ready to go] You're in charge!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Of the ship or the movies?

[In connection with the Vissian cogenitor, Dr. Phlox and Tucker are talking about alien impregnation techniques]

Dr. Phlox:
In this case, I imagine the cogenitor provides an enzyme, which facilitates conception.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What do you mean by 'provides'?

Dr. Phlox:
Well, first the female has to...

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
No - no, no, no, don't tell me. I don't think I wanna know.

Dr. Phlox:
Oh, well - hm... I have pictures!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Uh, I think I'll pass.

Vissian Chief Engineer:
It's easy to misunderstand someone, when you know nothing about their culture.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
If you can't get over a wave, you gotta dive through it.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
It'll be nice to have a first contact where no one's thinking about charging weapons.

Veylo, Vissian Tactical Officer:
Can we visit the Armory later? I'm anxious to see your tactical array.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
There's an old Earth expression: I'll show you mine if... you show me yours.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
So, you've heard of these cogenitors?

Dr. Phlox:
[nods] Not all species are limited to two sexes. In fact, I, er... have it on good authority that the Rigelians have four. Or was it five?

Dr. Phlox:
Keep an open mind, Commander, hm? You came on this mission to meet other species, no matter how many genders they may have.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[of the cogenitor] They treat her like a pet. Kept in a room, not taught to read or write, no name. Porthos has a name!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
This cogenitor is treated like one of Phlox's leeches. You pull it out of its tank when you need it, then you... throw it back in.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Tri-gender reproduction is not uncommon.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
That's not what I'm talking about. This is a question of... Human rights.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
They're not Human.

Vissian Chief Engineer:
You might find this difficult to believe, but this polymer is composed of over 200 naturally occurring elements.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
That's impossible!

Vissian Chief Engineer:
I read in your database that you've discovered only 92. I understand how this might seem unnerving.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
A lot of things around here do, but, um... I'm trying to keep an open mind.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We're out here to meet new species, not tell them what to do!

[Tucker has interfered with Vissian customs by exposing the cogenitor to Human culture... ]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I might have expected something like this from a first-year recruit. But not you. You did exactly what I'd do? If that's true, then I've done a pretty lousy job setting an example around here. You're a senior officer on this ship. You're privy to the moral challenges I've had to face. You know I've wrestled with the fine line between doing what I think is right and interfering with other species. So don't tell me you know what I would have done when *I* don't even know what I would have done!

[... which subsequently leads to the cogenitor's suicide]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It's time you learned to weigh the possible repercussions of your actions. You've always been impulsive. Maybe this will teach you a lesson.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You knew you had no business interfering with those people. But you just couldn't let it alone. You thought you were doing the right thing. I might agree if this was... Florida, or Singapore. But it's not, is it? We're in deep space, and a person is dead - a person who'd still be alive if we hadn't made first contact.

[Mayweather has been left in charge of the bridge]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Aren't you gonna take the chair?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
What?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[winking to the Captain's chair] You're in command!

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[laughs sheepishly] I'm fine right here.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Haven't you ever wondered what it's like?

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
I can wait till I'm promoted.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[trying out the Captain's chair after all] Bridge looks a lot different from here... Think anyone would mind if I fired a torpedo?

Temporal Agent Daniels:
I'm sorry about the mess. Sometimes I think my bunkmate majored in chaos theory.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Looks like we could be having guests. Tell Chef to prepare... something.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Are you Human?

Temporal Agent Daniels:
More or less.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I always knew we'd be meeting people from other planets, but... other centuries?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
So, I take it your brother isn't really an orbital engineer at Jupiter Station.

Temporal Agent Daniels:
Actually, I don't have a brother.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
And you didn't grow up in Illinois.

Temporal Agent Daniels:
Oh, I'm from a place called Illinois, sir. Just not the one you're familiar with.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
It's good to know Earth will still be around in 900 years.

Temporal Agent Daniels:
That depends on how you define Earth.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You know, we've got a little pool going in Engineering, where we try to guess how far the ship will travel each day. I don't suppose you could give me a tip on tomorrow's distance?

[T'Pol has doubts about Daniels being a time traveler]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I thought you scientists were supposed to keep an open mind.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
There's a difference between keeping an open mind and believing something because you want it to be true.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What the hell's that supposed to mean?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You're asking me to capture someone who just saved my ship. Why should I trust you?

Temporal Agent Daniels:
You like your scrambled eggs soft. Have I ever brought them to you any other way?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to Silik] You keep saying you're here to help us. But I can't stop wondering what kind of genetic enhancements you'll get for bringing back that little prize. Eyes in the back of your head? A pair of wings?

Silik:
Did they tell you that the 22nd century was going to be your final resting place?

[to Daniels, before shooting him]

[Soong is torturing a man to death in order to make Dr. Lucas reveal his secret access code]

Dr. Arik Soong:
I'm asking you, one doctor to another, stop this!

Dr. Jeremy Lucas:
I can't.

Dr. Arik Soong:
Is it worth this man's life?

Dr. Jeremy Lucas:
I have orders.

Dr. Arik Soong:
I can save him!

[he watches the dying man]

Dr. Arik Soong:
How can you let this happen?

Dr. Jeremy Lucas:
How can you?

Dr. Arik Soong:
Am I going to spend the rest of my life trying to get rid of you?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You're gonna spend the rest of your life in prison.

Malik:
We were defending our right to exist.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You already killed over 25 people. Your existence has a pretty high price.

Malik:
It could get higher.

Malik:
I wasn't sure how I'd justify killing you.

[he tosses Archer over a console]

Malik:
Now you've given me the perfect excuse.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
[groaning] Whatever I can do to... help.

Malik:
Five minutes after we leave, every stasis field in this station will shut down, releasing hundreds of pathogens. I wonder which one will kill you first.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Stick around and find out.

[Archer and Reed are shooting an Augment three times before he goes down]

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
That's what it takes to stun them. What have you gotta do to kill them?

Dr. Phlox:
Even an Augment needs oxygen.

Malik:
Some men are braver with their own lives than they are with the lives of others.

Smike:
I won't betray my brothers and sisters.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Your brothers and sisters are in danger. They attacked a Klingon ship. If the Klingons find them before we do...

Smike:
Then more Klingons will die. You'll never stop them, Captain. No one will.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
If you've had enough sickbay food, I'd like you to join me in the Captain's mess.

Smike:
Do I have a choice?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
No.

Dr. Phlox:
You might be interested to know, Smike's become quite the student of Earth history. He's been reading up on the Eugenics Wars.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I doubt Soong gave him the whole story.

Dr. Phlox:
I'm quite familiar with the subject myself. Human intellect and Human instinct were out of sync. So many people were killed.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Denobula perfected genetic engineering a long time ago. But you never came close to destroying yourselves.

Dr. Phlox:
Perhaps we were simply fortunate.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Or maybe your instincts... had caught up with your intellect.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Whenever a group of people start believing they're better than everyone else, the results are always the same.

Dr. Arik Soong:
I don't need a history lesson from you.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You need it from someone.

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
I knew Degra for many years. He could be difficult - uncompromising. We argued often; for instance, when he insisted that we meet with you. But when Degra spoke, only a fool would ignore him. He believed there was a future between your people and ours. When this is over, I intend to see if he was right.

Commander Dolim:
[to Sato] Before your primate brain is too badly damaged to understand, I want to thank you for helping us destroy your world.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Captain's starlog, February 13th, 2154 - We're preparing to enter a Xindi vortex, thanks to some help from the Aquatics. If everything goes as planned, we'll intercept the weapon in less than two hours. Enterprise may be coming apart at the seams, but I can't say the same for the crew. After nearly eight months in the Expanse, they're ready to do what they came to do, no matter what it takes, no matter what the cost.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
The Captain told the Aquatics we could disable these spheres.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
And I'm trying not to make a liar out of him.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Really?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What do you mean by that?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
You've dismissed all of my proposals.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
When you come up with one that doesn't involve blowin' ourselves up, I'll be a little more enthusiastic.

[T'Pol and Tucker are analyzing the data from the sphere]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
This could be a command subroutine.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
And it could be a letter to Santa Claus.

[T'Pol has considered joining Starfleet formally]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Can you imagine the look on Soval's face when he sees her in a Starfleet uniform? Please, let me be there!

[last lines]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[referring to Tucker] I expect you to keep him in line.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
I'll do my best.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
How long do they plan to keep us waiting?

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
You have to deal with the Aquatics on their terms.

Jannar:
They're extremely deliberate, in everything they do.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to the Aquatics] Help me save my people - and I can help you save yours.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Any word?

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
It's only been three hours. The Council once needed to resolve a simple logistical matter. It took the Aquatics six days to agree to attend the meeting.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm surprised you were ever able to get anything done.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Six vessels approaching, sir. All Aquatic.

Xindi-Primate Councilor:
*That* was remarkably fast!

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
[to the MACOs] We've got less than ten hours before this weapon reaches Earth. The Captain wants to take a team aboard to destroy it. I don't imagine the Reptilians will make this easy for us. But that's why you're here. That's why Major Hayes picked each one of you for this mission - because he knew you'd get the job done.

[Archer, Reed and some MACOs are about to take up pursuit of the Xindi weapon in Degra's ship]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Malcolm, hang on! Bring me back a piece of that weapon - a souvenir.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
With pleasure.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
When we're finished, we'll meet you at the rendezvous coordinates.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
We'll be there. - Captain... Good luck.

Major Hayes:
When we first came aboard Enterprise, we definitely felt like outsiders.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
If I contributed to that, I apologize...

Major Hayes:
My point is, none of us feel that way anymore. We're all part of the same crew, no matter which uniform we wear. Don't worry about Ensign Sato. We'll bring her home.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
Thank you, for bringing her home.

Major Hayes:
All in a day's work.

Sphere-Builder Primary:
How do these developments affect the timeline?

Sphere-Builder Presage:
It's difficult to say. They continue to fluctuate. However, most now indicate, the Humans will prevail.

Sphere-Builder Woman:
Then the time has come for us to intervene.

[after a battle with Enterprise and the other Xindi, the Reptilians and Insectoid have escaped with the Weapon]

Xindi-Insectoid Councilman:
[on viewscreen, in Insectoid] The anomalies worked to our advantage.

Commander Dolim:
We were fortunate.

Xindi-Insectoid Councilman:
[in Insectoid] It was more than good fortune. The human claims the Guardians control the Spheres.

Commander Dolim:
He also started a civil war between our species.

Xindi-Insectoid Councilman:
[in Insectoid] The human didn't kill Degra. *You* did.

Commander Dolim:
Degra was a traitor.

Xindi-Insectoid Councilman:
[in Insectoid] I'm no longer certain of that.

Commander Dolim:
Then it's a good thing we already have your launch codes. [ends communications and turns to his tactical officer] Lock weapons on their ship.

Xindi-Reptilian Soldier:
Sir?

Commander Dolim:
I won't risk any more interference. Fire.

[the Reptilian ship fires on the Insectoid ship, causing it to spin off exploded against the weapon]

[Trip and Dr. Erickson are talking about the invention of the transporter]

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Is it true you were the first person to go through?

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I wasn't about to let anyone else do it.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Ah, you must've been scared.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
Terrified. That original transporter took a full minute and a half to cycle through. Felt like a year. You could actually feel yourself being taken apart, put back together. When I materialized, first thing I did was lose my lunch.

[Trip laughs]

Dr. Emory Erickson:
Second thing I did was get stone drunk. Trick I learned from Zefram Cochrane. Now, there was a man who knew the benefits of a little "liquid courage".

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Maybe you should start thinking more about yourself.

[Danica gives him an awkward look]

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I know, it's hard taking advice from someone who used to chase you around the backyard with a plastic laser pistol.

[about Porthos, the dog]

Danica Erickson:
He's got a lot of personality.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
And an appetite to match.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
Jonathan, look at you! I always suspected you'd be famous. Just didn't think that you'd be more famous than me!

[Dr. Erickson is trying to get his son Quinn back, who had been lost during a transporter accident years ago]

Danica Erickson:
[of Quinn] I wonder... what it must be like for him, you know. Is he in pain? Is he conscious? If he is, does he think that we've forgotten about him? Quinn was everything to my father. To both of us. Getting him back is all that we've thought about for the past fifteen years.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
Let's hope when this is over, you'll have something else to think about.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I'm scared.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
I don't blame you.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I've waited so long for this moment, planned for it. What if something goes wrong? What if I fail?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
On the day before I entered flight training, I asked my father pretty much the same thing.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
What did he say?

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
"Don't fail."

Dr. Emory Erickson:
[chuckles] Henry never was a poet.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
He didn't need to be.

[with his experiments, Dr. Erickson has put Enterprise and its entire crew at risk, much to Trip's disapproval]

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I'm disappointed that you think less of me.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You liked me better when I worshiped your shadow?

Dr. Emory Erickson:
Yes.

[Tucker looks at him awkwardly]

Dr. Emory Erickson:
It's an honest answer.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I'd think you'd be out of practice.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
You may wanna reserve judgment on my actions until you've lost a son.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I *have* lost someone close. And I'd do almost anything to get her back - except put other people in danger.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I'm sorry, Quinn.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I couldn't leave him like that. It's better to be alive or dead - not somewhere in between.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
If it means anything... my guess is, Quinn would feel the same way.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
Maybe they'll put me somewhere where I'll be useful - get a chance to teach.

Capt. Jonathan Archer:
You'd probably be good at it.

Dr. Emory Erickson:
I wouldn't be boring. Why settle for making myself miserable when I can spread the misery around to an entire class of students?

Commander T'Pol:
Kir'Shara is having an enormous impact.

Dr. Phlox:
It's clearly had an impact on you. You, er... seem more certain of yourself.

Commander T'Pol:
I've never felt less certain.

Dr. Phlox:
Erm... You're reexamining your core beliefs. Something most people never do.

Commander T'Pol:
I'm learning, it seems, for the first time, what it truly means to be Vulcan.

Cmdr. Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
At least my warp engines still need me.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
How long have you been a doctor?

Dr. Phlox:
Nearly forty years.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
And in all that time... did you ever do anything you thought was unethical?

Dr. Phlox:
[after a pause] Twice. Why?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I'm about to step over a line - a line I thought I would never cross. And given the nature of our mission, it probably won't be the last.

Dr. Phlox:
Probably not. May I ask what you're planning to do?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
There could be more casualties.

Dr. Phlox:
I'll be ready.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
There's an unidentified vessel approaching. They're asking for our assistance.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Any details?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Just that they've taken heavy damage.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Join the club.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I really don't know what's holding us together. But let's hope it doesn't give out.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
My mother always wanted me to take piano lessons. Shoulda listened to her.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
It's never too late. You can start when we get home. We're getting home.

[in a fit of rage, T'Pol has smashed a PADD in Archer's quarters]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We've had our share of disagreements; but you've never taken it out on my desk before.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
We've run out of moons to hide behind.

[Degra and his confidants have consulted the Sphere-Builder Woman over Archer's allegations against the Reptilians, yet without getting the desired reassurance]

Xindi-Primate:
You don't believe her?

Degra:
Do you?

Xindi-Primate:
Why should we take Archer's word over hers?

Degra:
Because Archer offered something she hasn't. Proof.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[of Degra] He may not be on our side. But I get the feeling he's starting to question his.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
It's hard to imagine that we'll ever get this ship back the way it was.

Dr. Phlox:
It's a simple matter of repairs. Well, perhaps not that simple. Somehow I don't think it's the damage to Enterprise that's... troubling you.

Cpt. Archer:
Put together an armed boarding party.

Lt. Reed:
Who are we boarding, sir?

Cpt. Archer:
The alien ship we docked with.

Lt. Reed:
I don't understand.

Cpt. Archer:
We need their warp coil. They won't give it to us, so we're going to have to take it.

Lt. Reed:
Captain...

Cpt. Archer:
Get your men together!

[after Enterprise has taken the alien ship's warp coil by force]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You did the right thing.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Seems the longer we're out here, the more I have to keep saying that to myself.

Illyrian Captain:
You're stranding us three years from home! Why are you doing this?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Because I have no choice.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[about his attempts to communicate with the Arkonian] It's like talking to Porthos.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[from his log entry] For the record - I have learned one thing about him: his name's Zho'Kaan.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[to Zho'Kaan] Anything you want to say to the folks back home?

Zho'Kaan:
Nohkto.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Yeah... That means 'bad'.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
You managed to establish better relations in a single day than the Vulcans have in a century.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Let's hope it stays that way.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
It's a thermo-kinetic analysis of the moons. Each of them undergoes extreme temperature variations during their orbits.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Go on.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
At night, it can drop to five or even ten degrees below zero.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
That doesn't sound so bad.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
During the day, the temperature can rise to as high as 170 degrees.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We better hope that Trip landed on the night side.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
And that we find him before the sun rises.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[from his log entry] One piece of good news. It's starting to warm up a little. Dawn is coming.

[Tucker gets hit by a discharge]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Damn it!

Zho'Kaan:
"Damn it".

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, looks like we've made some headway in our first contact between Humans and, um... whatever you are. Unfortunately your first word is somethin' you wouldn't wanna use in polite company.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I tell ya, I wouldn't trade my time on Enterprise, not for anything. I've seen things I couldn't have imagined back home. I saw the... Great Plume of Agosoria. And I saw the... ringed moons of Matalas Prime... And I stood on an... asteroid crater, twice as high as Everest. Went diving in the ice caves of Etheenia. Rode in a... Suliban cell ship. Spent the night... I spent the night with a princess. Oh, and I... I even got pregnant once. Now, there's a story. I'm sure you have stories too. That's why we chose this life, right? See things we've never seen before. Hell of a ride, though... Hell of a ride...

[last lines]

Zho'Kaan:
Trip... when I fired at your vessel... I'm grateful I didn't destroy it.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
That makes two of us.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
It can't be ethical to cause a patient this much pain.

Dr. Phlox:
It's unethical to harm a patient; I can inflict as much pain as I like.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
We're explorers. Where's your spirit of adventure?

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I left it in a Romulan minefield.

[repeated line]

Repair Station Computer:
Your inquiry was not recognized.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[to station computer] On my world, we have an expression: "Customer is always right." Maybe you should make that part of your program.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
[on the device that is treating his leg] Are you sure this thing knows what it's doing?

Dr. Phlox:
That's the third time you've asked.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
You didn't answer me the first two times.

Dr. Phlox:
The wound might heal faster if you'd allow me to apply a few more Regulan bloodworms.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
You're not putting any more of those things inside my leg. You still haven't found the last one.

[Tucker inspects the space dock's analysis of Enterprise's damages]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[pointing at an area of the simulation] I'll be damned. We scratched the hull right there, a year ago. I bumped it with the inspection pod, remember?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I thought I told you to have that repainted.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I was gettin' around to it.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
They even fixed the squeak in the floor. Starting to wonder if we had a gremlin under the deck plating.

[T'Pol gives him a questioning look]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A mythical creature. British pilots used to blame them for problems they couldn't explain.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Perhaps I should scan for one.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I know you don't... put a lot of faith in your feelings, but... I've learned to trust mine. Something doesn't smell right.

Dr. Phlox:
[examining a corpse] Subject's name: Ensign Travis Mayweather, Human male. Weight: 72 kilograms. Age: 26 Earth years - far too young to be on this table.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[to Reed] You've made it clear to me that you think discipline aboard Enterprise has gotten a little too lax. I'm beginning to agree with you.

[after Reed and Tucker have unsuccessfully tried to circumvent a security barrier in the space station]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
I want to know how someone files a grievance around here.

Dr. Phlox:
It's ironic in a way. The station can duplicate a dead human body in all its exquisite detail, yet a living, simple, one-celled organism is beyond its capability.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Malcolm, I think it's time we deliver our payment.

[Phlox has discovered something odd during Travis' autopsy]

Archer:
Did you find something?

Dr. Phlox:
As a matter of fact, I did. This is not Ensign Mayweather.

Archer:
What?

Dr. Phlox:
It's a nearly perfect replica. I've never seen a lifeform duplicated in such extraordinary detail, from its epidermis down to its cellular proteins. This is remarkable work.

Archer:
If it's so perfect, how do you know it's not him?

Dr. Phlox:
You recall what happened to Crewman Fisher last month after our visit to Tessik Prime?

Archer:
He came down with Rigelian fever.

Dr. Phlox:
I inoculated the entire crew to prevent an outbreak. Would you mind rolling up your sleeve?

[Phlox puts a cuff over Archer's wrist and shows his bloodstream on the monitor]

Dr. Phlox:
The vaccine contained millions of genetically altered microbes. Most of them are still in your bloodstream. They typically survive for, oh, at least several weeks.

[Phlox places a cuff on the corpse]

Dr. Phlox:
Every one of the alien microbes in this body is dead.

Archer:
Couldn't they have been killed by the isolytic shock?

Dr. Phlox:
These microbes thrive on isolytic energy. If anything, they would have multiplied. I believe that someone, or something, has abducted Ensign Mayweather and left this facsimile in his place.

Archer:
Apparently bulkheads aren't the only thing this station can replicate.

Dr. Phlox:
Are you married, Crewman?

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
Course not! I would've told you.

Dr. Phlox:
I'm married.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
You are?

Dr. Phlox:
Three times.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
So, you have... two ex-wives?

Dr. Phlox:
I have three current wives, and they each have two husbands, not counting myself.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
Is that considered normal for Denobulans?

Dr. Phlox:
Quite.

[from a letter from Dr. Lucas to Dr. Phlox]

Dr. Lucas (voice):
It's mating season, so you know how that goes. I thought Human reproduction was complicated. You Denobulans make us look like single-cell organisms.

[from Phlox's reply to Dr. Lucas, his Human colleague]

Dr. Phlox:
You'll be pleased to hear that the crew finally seems to be growing accustomed to an alien doctor on board. I must admit, I wasn't planning to stay this long, but the opportunity to observe your species on their first deep space venture has proven irresistible.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] Since we were on the subject of mating, I think Crewman Cutler may be romantically interested in me. I can't be certain, however; the pheromones of Human females aren't as potent as Denobulans'.

[the crew is watching a romantic movie]

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
We can go if you're bored.

Dr. Phlox:
No, no, I'd like to stay and see what happens.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
You won't be disappointed. The ending's classic.

Dr. Phlox:
[chortles] Not the film. I'm sensing a rising emotional undercurrent in the room. I'm curious to see if it culminates in some kind of group response.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] It's remarkable, Doctor, even fictional characters seem to elicit Human compassion. My shipmates have calmly faced any number of dangers, and yet a simple movie can bring tears to their eyes.

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
They don't have movies where you come from, do they?

Dr. Phlox:
Well, we had something similar a few hundred years ago, but they lost their appeal when people discovered their real lives were more interesting.

Dr. Phlox:
[about the heart] Physiologically, it is nothing more than a very efficient pump. What could possibly make you people think it is the source of all emotion?

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
Now, you may know about our cardiopulmonary system, but you have a lot to learn about the human heart.

[Sato is exercising her Denobulan language skills, commenting about Phlox's developing relationship with Cutler]

Dr. Phlox:
[in Denobulan] Do you have any advice?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[in Denobulan] I think you make a very cute... washboard.

Dr. Phlox:
I beg your pardon?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
[laughing] Couple! A cute couple!

Dr. Phlox:
Denobulans require very little rest, unless you count our annual hibernation cycle.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Am I gonna be without my doctor this winter?

Dr. Phlox:
Only for six days.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Maybe I'll join you.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] I never thought I'd meet a species that forges such intimate bonds with lesser creatures. It's surprising, the things you Humans choose to invest your emotions in.

[on Archer's relationship to his dog]

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] I've noticed how the Captain seems to anthropomorphize his pet. He even talks to the creature, although I'm fairly certain it has no idea what he's saying. Then again, I've been known to speak to my Pyrithian bat on occasion.

[Dr. Phlox is scanning a Menk, on which the latter asks something in his language]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
He wants to know what you're doing.

Dr. Phlox:
Have you learned enough Menk to explain a molecular bio-scan?

[Sato replies to the Menk in Menk]

Crewman Elizabeth Cutler:
What'd you say?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Told him the Doctor was looking inside of him.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
Tik-tik.

[Menk for 'Thank you']

Esaak:
[to Archer and T'Pol] You two are not from the same planet?

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
No. We may look alike, but the similarity ends there.

Dr. Phlox:
Evolution is more than a theory. It is a fundamental scientific principle.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] Despite the Menks' insistence that they're treated well, my Human crewmates seem to see things differently... They think the Menk are being exploited by the Valakians. So their first instinct is to rise to their defense, despite the fact that the Menk don't appear to need or want a defender.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] I had meant to transmit this letter by now, but the Valakian epidemic has been taking up most of my time. Working with the physicians here has been quite fulfilling. I suppose it's the reason we joined the Interspecies Medical Exchange. But I worry about falsely raising their hopes. Despite Captain Archer's confidence in me, I'm afraid the scale of the disaster may outweigh our best intentions.

[Archer realizes that the Valakians don't have the expertise to develop a warp engine on their own]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
We could... stay and help them.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
The Vulcans stayed to help Earth ninety years ago. We're still there.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I never thought I'd say this, but... I'm beginning to understand how the Vulcans must have felt.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
A cure, Doctor? Have you found a cure?

Dr. Phlox:
[after some hesitation] Even if I could find one, I'm not sure it would be ethical.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Ethical?

Dr. Phlox:
We'd be interfering with an evolutionary process that has been going on for thousands of years.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Every time you treat an illness, you're interfering. That's what doctors do.

Dr. Phlox:
You're forgetting about the Menk.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What about the Menk?

Dr. Phlox:
I've been studying their genome as well, and I have seen evidence of increasing intelligence - motor skills, linguistic abilities. Unlike the Valakians, they appear to be in the process of an evolutionary awakening. It may take millennia; but the Menk have the potential to become the dominant species on this planet.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
And that won't happen as long as the Valakians are around?

Dr. Phlox:
If the Menk are to flourish, they need an opportunity to survive on their own.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Well, what are you suggesting? We choose... one species over the other?

Dr. Phlox:
All I'm saying is that we let nature make the choice.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
The hell with nature. You're a doctor. You have a moral obligation to help people who are suffering.

Dr. Phlox:
[firmly] I'm also a scientist; and I'm obligated to consider the larger issues. 35,000 years ago, your species co-existed with other humanoids, isn't that correct?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
[sighs] Go ahead.

Dr. Phlox:
What if an alien race had interfered and given the Neanderthals an evolutionary advantage? Fortunately for you, they didn't.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I appreciate your perspective on all of this. But we're talking about something that might happen. *Might* happen thousands of years from now. They've asked for our help. I am not prepared to walk away, based on a theory.

Dr. Phlox:
Evolution is more than a theory. It is a fundamental scientific principle. Forgive me for saying so - but I believe your compassion for these people is affecting your judgment.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
My compassion guides my judgment.

Dr. Phlox:
Captain...

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Can you find a cure?

[Phlox hesitates]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Doctor?

Dr. Phlox:
[after a long pause] I already have.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] Two days ago, when we first discovered the alien shuttle, I had no idea that I'd be facing a dilemma of this magnitude. For the first time, I find myself in conflict with my Captain. But he is my Captain, and he's placed a great deal of trust in me. I believe I owe him the same.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Someday... my people are going to come up with some sort of a doctrine, something that tells us what we can and can't do out here, should and shouldn't do. But until somebody tells me that they've drafted that directive... I'm going to have to remind myself every day... that we didn't come out here to play God.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] I'd like to think, Doctor Lucas, that if I'd had a chance to talk to you face to face, you would have never let me even consider withholding my findings from the Captain. But I'm ashamed to say, I almost did just that.

Dr. Phlox:
[voice-over] If I hadn't trusted him to make the right choice, I'd have been no better than the Vulcan diplomats who held your species back, because they felt you couldn't make proper decisions on your own. I came very close to misjudging Jonathan Archer. But this incident has helped me gain a new respect for him. Happiness and health to you, Doctor. Your, erm... dedicated colleague Phlox.

Nathan Samuels:
Having endured a catastrophic world war, Earth's governments came to this city, for the purpose of creating a just and lasting peace among nations. Today, we have assembled here again, representatives of numerous worlds, to forge an unprecedented alliance. With this coalition of planets, we seek to strengthen our bonds of friendship, render permanent the peace that now exists among us, for the ongoing exploration of our galaxy. Let us dedicate ourselves to these worthy goals, so that future generations can look back upon this moment with pride and eternal gratitude. Thank you.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Clap louder, that's an order.

Commander T'Pol:
You've set a formidable goal. The drafting of a charter in six weeks?

Nathan Samuels:
I've always believed that formidable goals produce formidable results.

Nathan Samuels:
These universal translators work perfectly, thanks to you.

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
I just updated them with a few things we picked up on the mission.

Nathan Samuels:
Whatever you did, they're extremely precise. Though, when I'm listening to the Tellarite ambassador, I wish they were just a little less precise.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[about Enterprise's shuttlepods] I've always had a tendency to get attached to machines. It's crazy, but every time we use the transporter, I... feel we're kind of turning our backs on these guys.

John Frederick Paxton:
[looking at a baby] She looks so innocent. It's almost possible to forget what she represents.

[Paxton is wondering whether Mercer may have become attached to the child]

Mercer:
I feel no differently about it than anyone else that I've treated.

John Frederick Paxton:
This isn't "anyone else". This is an abomination. And when the time comes, it will be treated as such.

Commander T'Pol:
Trip, the moment Phlox said that the child was ours, I knew it was true.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
But you said you'd never been...

Commander T'Pol:
I haven't.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Then what are you saying?

Commander T'Pol:
I can't explain how it exits, but I know it does. There's a child out there, and it's ours.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
How do you know that?

Commander T'Pol:
I'm Vulcan.

Harris:
The child belongs to two of your crewmen. You tell me.

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
They claim they know nothing about it.

Harris:
That doesn't seem likely, does it?

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
I believe them.

Harris:
I admire your loyalty.

Dr. Phlox:
[referring to the child] Vulcan and Human physiology are not all that dissimilar. From the evidence I have, there's no reason to believe she's anything but perfectly healthy.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
That's good to hear.

Dr. Phlox:
You'll also be interested to know she has your eyes, and T'Pol's ears.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You know, my father always wanted a granddaughter. Bugged my sister about it constantly.

Dr. Phlox:
It seems he got his wish.

[Archer has found out that Samuels was once a member of Terra Prime]

Nathan Samuels:
I was very young when I joined Terra Prime.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You were eighteen.

Nathan Samuels:
Didn't you make any questionable choices when you were that age, Captain? It was a stupid mistake. I was a fool. My father had died in a freighter accident, and I blamed the pilot who happened to be Denobulan. We all have our demons. I've exorcized mine.

Nathan Samuels:
I underestimated you. I suppose I'm not the first person to make that mistake.

[T'Pol has been captured by Greaves]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[trying to attack Greaves] What did you do to her?

Daniel Greaves:
Not nearly enough.

John Frederick Paxton:
It's not worth it, Romeo. Juliet's in good hands.

Gannet Brooks:
I have a rule: if I'm in bed with someone, they have to be in bed with me.

[Josiah is complaining about the aliens on Earth and in the Orpheus mining facility]

Josiah:
Least, there aren't as many of 'em up here. Seems like everywhere you go, Humans are getting to be an endangered species.

John Frederick Paxton:
'No' is a word that Starfleet better get used to hearing from now on. Because up until today, it's always been 'yes', hasn't it? Yes, yes, go right ahead, roam the stars. Yes, inform potentially hostile species of the whereabouts of Earth. Yes, entrust the entire future of our world to non-Human creatures, who don't even feel like we do. Yes, promote the total degradation of mankind, by encouraging alien-Human... relations. Well, 'yes' is a word that ends here and now! I'm returning Earth to its rightful owners. I am giving Earth back to Humanity, back to Human beings. It is my life's work; it is what I was born to do. And there is no one, not an alien, not a Human, that will stop me from achieving it.

[last lines]

John Frederick Paxton:
A new era is at hand. An era that will expose the concept of interspecies unity as an absolute and vicious lie. An era that will witness the advent of a Human-centered consciousness that will place our world before all others. As of this moment, mankind casts off the shackles of alien interference and now determines its own fate. Terra Prime... forever.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
The desert, sir? The heat, the dry air? You know how it sucks the life outta me.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What about the two weeks we spent in Australia? We had a great time.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Survival training in the outback? Drinkin' recycled sweat and eatin' snake meat? That's your idea of a great time?

[Archer and Tucker are stuck in a basement within a settlement which is targeted by cannon fire]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
So, does the... "great warrior" have any ideas about how we're gettin' outta here?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
T'Pol's ears must be burning.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
The warp reactor. Break it down for me.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
What?

Captain Jonathan Archer:
What are the eight major components?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
You gotta be kiddin' me.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Name them. That's an order!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Well, the... there's the drumsticks... thighs... wings... You got anything to eat around here?

[Archer and Tucker are arguing whether 'Xanadu' is admissible in a game of geography, when their shelter is rattled by mortar fire]

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
All right, whatever you say. Xanadu's fine!

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
[after crossing the desert and suffering from heat exhaustion] Now this... is my idea of a great time.

[Sato is questioning the wisdom of the Vulcans' choice of location when making first contact with the Humans]

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
An alien species makes contact with the United States. It could have made a lot of other countries nervous.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
What's your point?

Ensign Hoshi Sato:
It seems to me that we're gonna run into similar problems: we get invited to dinner, and before you know it, we're accused of taking sides in a war.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Contacting new worlds always involves unexpected risks. The High Command has very specific protocols regarding planetary conflicts. Eventually, Captain Archer will have to... create some directives of his own.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
You got a fever, Trip. Your heart's racing. You got all the symptoms of heatstroke. If you fall asleep you could lapse into a coma.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
A coma. That sounds nice.

[Zobral is refusing to help find Archer and Tucker in the desert]

Lieutenant Malcolm Reed:
You're the one who got our people stranded down there.

Zobral:
They are not *my* responsibility!

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
You're mistaken. The Torothans believe we've joined your cause. If Captain Archer and Commander Tucker are apprehended, they'll undoubtedly be treated as members of your clan. They'll become victims of the same oppression you've been fighting all these years. You should feel as responsible for those two men as you do for your own.

[Zobral has asked Archer earlier to support him in his fight against the Torothans]

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Zobral, even if I were the warrior you thought I was... that's not why we're out here.

[last lines]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
[referring to Zobral] What you told him was correct. Decisions to get involved in conflicts of other worlds should be left to governments, not starship captains.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
I know. The irony is, I have the feeling his cause is worth fighting for.

Captain Jonathan Archer:
Why are we here?

Suliban Woman:
Why are any of us here?

[Archer and Mayweather are being detained by the Tandarans and awaiting their hearing]

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
If you'd like, I'll contact the Vulcan High Command. They might be willing to send an arbitrator.

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
A Vulcan lawyer? They'd be better off gettin' the electric chair.

Sub-Commander T'Pol:
Electric chair?

Commander Charles 'Trip' Tucker III:
Never mind.

Ensign Travis Mayweather:
[stirring in some kind of porridge] They call this a proper meal? I should save it for Commander Tucker; it'd make a good valve sealant.