Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #263

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,814 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Doc:
Hey, I got that kidney you wanted. 300 bucks.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

TV Meemaw:
Do not tell Hurlan I need him to get me...one of these!

Hurlan:
Were would I not get one of those?

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurlan:
Urethra! Who's the idjit now?! I'm one step closer to finding him -- That's who!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
You know about truth serum, right?

Sheriff:
I'd be lying if I said I do.

Doc:
Well, this right here is delusional serum. I can inject it into your eye's balls.

Sheriff:
Is this real?

Doc:
The doctor who sold it to me gave me a free trial first, then convinced me it was, so it has to be!

Doc:
And that doctor and I fell in love. Ain't that right, Helen? [quietly speaks to Helen] God, just say -- No, you say you're sorry!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Sheriff:
The truth is, I'm in love with another woman. But I can't get out of my marriage!

Doc:
Well, that's simple! Just fantasize your wife is this other you love!

Sheriff:
Does that work?

Doc:
Works for Helen and me. [quietly speaks to Helen] What?! Just stand there!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Doc:
Your rape kit is coming up negative.

Sheriff:
Oh, I know rape ain't real, Doc. "Rape, schmape" is the policeman's motto.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
Lord, cleanse me from my sins.

[Hambrosia pulls out a whip from the book]

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
I thought later tonight, maybe I could give you a kiss on the cheek.

Sheriff:
I'm not a piece of meat. I've never felt so degraded! Your sick sexual urges are starting to scare me! You get off on that, you sick deviant?! You know, I don't feel safe here. I don't know when I'll be back!

[Sheriff leaves]

Hambrosia:
Why am I so dirty?!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
If we harness his flub-uppery, we reap the fruits of his bungle.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Boss Hoss:
[to TV Meemaw] I am telling you, It is the most significant task in Holler history, only we can't tell Hurlan! He'll just "fustercluck" it up the buttock. He's to idjit too be trusted.

Hurlan:
What? Trusted with what?

[Boss Hoss quickly hides the tv away]

Boss Hoss:
Nothing! I wasn't talking to anybody! I certainly wasn't having a serious discussion about a matter of great import with your Meemaw!

Hurlan:
Yes, you was! I'm gonna rewind you!

[Hurlan rewinds the videotape to bring the tv back what Hoss hided away, then there was another small button remote for the same TV in Meemaw's screen]

TV Meemaw:
There's nothing mysterious to see here, Hurlan!

Hurlan:
I ain't tater-brained, Meemaw!

TV Meemaw:
If you really weren't tater-brained, you'd ignore my plea begging you to don't go to my house to find my secret stash of tapes and follow the vital directive upon them!

Hurlan:
I'll smart you one better! I'm gon' go do do that! I'm gon' do-do all over everything!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
My brain is back. All it's powers! My rage.

Sheriff:
Hot cookies! Blow Hurlan into bits!

Hambrosia:
[growling] It won't work. My brain can't bear to see Hurlan get hurt.

Hambrosia's Brain:
Oh no!

Hambrosia:
Ugh! But I've got to put my anger somewhere!

[Hambrosia psychically puts her anger directly into Sheriff's crotch]

Sheriff:
Don't look at me there like that! Ohh!

[Sheriff's penis squirts out semen all over his face]

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Jordy:
Time to make the ketchup.

[cuts to the next scene, Jordy pooping in the toilet]

Jordy:
[singsong] I'm makin' ketchup. Freedom ketchup. So there!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Jordy:
I'm gonna ride your mama like a bike.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Jordy:
I'd like to hear the punchline of the joke you were telling the night they pulling me in. I missed that one.

Jacket:
S-S-S-Sure, Jordy. Uh, um, I believe it was, uh, "6 Million Jews."

[Jordy breathes heavily then laughs maniacally]

Jordy:
6 million jews! You hear him?! [laughs] Laugh! Oh, that was a good one, Jacket! Oh, in the hole for 5 years and that was worth it!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Sheriff:
What kind of pie is this?

Hambrosia:
It's just something I put in the oven to make someone care.

[Sheriff leaves out the room quickly before saying her response]

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

[Jordy has an serious chat with Psycho Mike (as The Reverend)]

Jordy:
Nice digs, Psycho Mike.

The Reverend:
When did you get out, Jordy?

Jordy:
You mean, when did I finish serving time because you didn't kill the Sheriff who fingered me in court?

The Reverend:
I-I tried! But you know I was never the killer. I was always the mule.

Jordy:
Never had the stomach to kill...but what an ass for muling.

Jordy:
'Member that time you mulled nine balloons full of stolen condoms and all the hot tripe? You were an american muling legend.

The Reverend:
I've gone righteous. The only thing I shove up my ass now is the pure, uncut love of the Lord and smuggle it to the people.

Jordy:
No. You're smuggling nothing to the people. You're gonna kill Sheriff.

The Reverend:
C-Can't we just let this slide?

Jordy:
They rode me like a bike in there.

[Jordy seriously leaves]

The Reverend:
Maybe I'll grow the guts to kill Jordy. Or maybe...I'll grow the guts to kill Jordy.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurlan:
I tried to be a good leader, but I blew it! What do I do now, Daddy?!

[Hurlan unpause the tv]

Boss Hoss:
Stab your friends in the back. I repeat -- Do not --

[Hurlan pauses the tv again]

Hurlan:
Got it! No need to repeat it!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
Don't you people get it? This is, like, the first thing ever that makes sense. You complain about the wind? What have you done with your life?

Hambrosia:
Ever made a bird soar? Not just in his butt but in his mind? I wrote a poem about it.

Hambrosia:
"Wind is just air taking a joy in a freedom Lamborghini with the top down, letting the wind blow through its hair. But you want to put that wind in jail, put air in electric chair? What are we to breathe the constitution? What does that even mean, man? Isn't man mean, man?"

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurlan:
Now I want a real honkin' hoohaw.

[chattering]

Hurlan:
Honkier.

[chattering]

Hurlan:
Honkier!

[Hambrosia's brain squirts out brain semen all over Hurlan's face]

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Sheriff:
Focus! Where could your brain go?

Hambrosia:
What is "go", man? A thing can't go anywhere 'cause if it arrives, it's still there. It's like...this poem I wrote.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurlan:
"Dear whoever finds my body, I don't want to live in a world where I have to clean my own room, so I am going to eat 1,000 pieces of candy so I explode to bits and die".

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hambrosia:
THE WICKED SHALL PAY FOR HIS MENDACITY!

Sheriff:
Blow him up with your mind.

[as Hambrosia tries to blow Hurlan up with her mind, her head starts to feel weird]

Hambrosia:
It's not working. My powers -- They're...gone.

Sheriff:
WHAT?! NO?! HELLFIRE HIM TO SMITHERS!

Hambrosia:
[hippie accent] You know, I'm gonna let him slide on this one. What good is violence anyway?

Sheriff:
You lost your crazy, girl? I just said that I'm in love with your sister. [meant to say Hurlan] Well, he said.

Hambrosia:
[hippie accent] It's cool. Those are just words, man. Words are just vibrating air.

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Sheriff:
Say this is Hurshe. [mention Hurlan] He said I'd be like..."Hurshe, I cherish every second that we're together away from that crazy wife of mine."

Sheriff:
[to Hambrosia] God, I wish this was really you right now.

Sheriff:
Can you believe he said that?!

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

Hurshe:
Let's rile my sis up so furious at Hurlan, she explodes him with her mind! With him dead and her in stir for first-degree brain-blowing, I'm left to take over, you at my side, humping me into the sunset.

Sheriff:
Oh, I'll have her brain beside itself with... [echoes] rage. Soon, her wingnut noodle will be eating out the palm of my... [echoes] plan. Hurlan is a formidable foe, but we got his ass in our teeth now! [laughs]

[cuts to the next scene where Hurlan still daydreaming]

The Heart, She Holler  Movie Quote

added 1 year ago

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