Business Saleswoman:
Oooh, these would look sexy on you.
[The underwear starts bleeding blood]
Tessa Doinel:
No, I-I don't like it.
Business Saleswoman:
Not your color?
Tessa Doinel:
No, it's the blood.
Business Saleswoman:
Oh. Well, there are other fluids. These ones here are self-snotting.
[The self-snotting underwear coughs up mucus]
Business Saleswoman:
Ooh, that's hot on you. You looking to spice up your marriage?
[The saleswoman wipes the snot off of Tessa's face and ate it]
Tessa Doinel:
Well, I'd like to have kids, so...
Business Saleswoman:
You should've said so. These ones are crotchless for easy...you know. Go on, push.
Tessa Doinel:
Huh?
[The Saleswoman pulls up a knife to force Tessa to push]
Business Saleswomen:
Push! Don't be shy.
[Tessa and the Saleswoman moans by making the underwear magically push out a baby]
Business Saleswoman:
Here it comes. Harder. Harder!
Business Saleswoman:
Ooh, that's sexy. You broke it, you bought it.
Tessa Doinel:
I don't know how to take care of it.
Business Saleswoman:
Gotcha covered. Just feed the goddamn thing till it moves out or goes to jail.
