Search results for 'spongebob' Page #13

Mr. Krabs:
The hooks, me bucko! They're back! Beware the hooks!

SpongeBob:
The hooks?

Mr. Krabs:
Aye, the hooks! They dangle down and draw you close with their pleasing shapes and beguiling colors, and just when you think you've found the land of milk and honey, they grab ya by the britches, and haul you way up high, and higher, and higher, and higher, until you're hauled up to the surface, flopping and gasping for breath! And then they cook ya, and then they eat ya...or worse!

SpongeBob:
[terrified] What could be worse than that?!

Mr. Krabs:
Gift shops.

Mr. Krabs:
Three cheers for feeling sorry for ourselves! Hip-hip...

SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, Mr. Krabs & Sandy:
HOORAY!

Mr. Krabs:
Hip-hip...

SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, Mr. Krabs & Sandy:
HOORAY!

Mr. Krabs:
Hip-hip...

Seagulls:
Hooray... [their bodies are completely naked because of Sandy's karate]

Mr. Krabs:
Today's a big a day for the Krusty Krab, so I want yous to listen up. [pushes the button. It causes a shield to go around the Krusty Krab] It's a perfect opportunity for Plankton to try and steal the Krabby Patty formula. [pulls a lever that looks like a handle on a table]

Squidward:
Isn't that just the Krusty Krab?

Mr. Krabs:
No. It's a holographic projection of the Krusty Krab. I want you two to watch all the entrances.

Squidward:
You mean the front door and the back door?

Mr. Krabs:
Those are just the ones on the surface. There is an entire network of tunnels and air ducts underground and I want all eyes on the look out!

SpongeBob:
Aye, aye, Mr. Krabs. [eyes grow on him, filling his holes]

Mr. Krabs:
Right. Study the map, stay extra vigilant. Don't fall asleep on the job. That means you, Squidward.

Squidward:
What?! I have never fallen asleep on duty.

Mr. Krabs:
Don't make me have a flashback.

Mr. Krabs:
Um what are you talking about my boy I just have crab legs because I collected them not for my Pattie.

SpongeBob:
Looks Like Plankton was right about you and not as evil as you

Mr. Krabs:
Plankton didn't have anything to do with this

SpongeBob:
He said you were hiding something and it turns out you were hiding being a disgusting cannibal.

Mr. Krabs:
well it's how the nature works we eat each other

SpongeBob:
so you admit it

Mr. Krabs:
no I just said If I did cook it in my patties it's just how nature works

SpongeBob:
now your just lying

Mr. Krabs :
Um now I am not hehe

Plankton:
yes you are I know were hiding something oh and also you killed your own daughters mother

SpongeBob:
you what

Mr Krabs:
don't believe him he is just lying and saying stuff

Plankton:
Then explain how you even got her in the first place huh and why I saw a whale and her mother wasn't there and why you had a hook and everything else.

Mr Krabs:
I was boating yeah that's it hehe

SpongeBob:
now your just lying

Mr. Krabs:
Well, Mr. Squidward, it's almost closing time, and we haven't seen eye or antennae of ol' Plankton for hours. Yes, sir, I think this time, he's finally given up for...

Plankton:
[over megaphone] Attention, Krusty Krab management! This is your better speaking!

Mr. Krabs:
What?! [Plankton is standing outside the Krusty Krab with a megaphone]

Plankton:
[over megaphone] I have the restaurant surrounded. Give me the secret formula or I'll destroy the Krusty Krab! [Mr. Krabs and Squidward run outside to Plankton]

Mr. Krabs:
Ah, you and what army, bug?

Plankton:
[chuckles] What army? What army!?! Look around you, Krabs! [scene pans out to show the Krusty Krab surrounded by something green]

Mr. Krabs:
...You planted grass?

Plankton:
Grass?! [starts laughing maniacally, joined by his family]

Mr. Krabs:
Uh-oh. [Mr. Krabs and Squidward scream and run into the Krusty Krab with the Plankton family behind them; and a blackout, within the Krusty Krab shaking and thudding noises, as if in a fight; scene cuts to Mr. Krabs' face] You'll never get away with it, Plankton! [Mr. Krabs is in the toilet, with only his head exposed as Squidward is stuck inside the toilet, surrounded by Plankton]

Plankton:
You're right. The pipes are much too narrow. Besides, what I really want is the Krabby Patty formula.

Mr. Krabs:
Well, you might as well forget it. The formula is locked away in me safe, and I'll never give ya the combination. [laughs]

Plankton:
Silence! [jumps on the flushing lever and sends Mr. Krabs spinning around and his eyes are tied up] I think you'll find we're more than capable of figuring it out for ourselves. Oh, boys? [Plankton snaps his finger and his family assembles into a giant human hand and ear; they twist the lock, figuring out the combination] That's it, a little to the left...

Mr. Krabs:
Curse you, Plankton, and your ability to join together to form a working human ear! [the family opens the safe and inside is the secret formula, which is a book labeled "Recipe for a Krabby Patty," in a bottle]

Plankton:
Hot dog! [Plankton hops up the stairs to the formula] Yes. It's mine! The formula's mine. After all these years, it's finally mine! [Plankton pulls the cork from the bottle and smells it as if it were champagne; he pulls the formula out of the bottle] Let it be known that on this day, I, Sheldon J. Plankton, single-handedly overthrew the Krusty Krab!

Family:
[variously] Ahem.

Plankton:
[notices his cousins annoyed by him not giving them credit] Eh, and, of course, I had a little help from the family. [goes back to Mr. Krabs, who is still stuck in the toilet]

Mr. Krabs:
Plankton, wait. You can't look at the formula.

Plankton:
Begging won't help.

Mr. Krabs:
I'm telling you, you won't be able to handle the truth. There are some things in this world that weren't meant for mortal eyes.

Plankton:
Eye.

Mr. Krabs:
Aye.

Plankton:
I don't care. [Mr. Krabs is shocked] Drum roll please! [Plankton rolls himself a snare drum roll on the snare drum, then runs to Mr. Krabs' desk] Finally, after all these years, I'm about to find out what makes a Krabby Patty taste so good! [opens book] The secret recipe for one Krabby Patty is... a pinch of salt...

Mr. Krabs:
Plankton! Wait!

Plankton:
[turns page] ...Three teaspoons of chopped onions...

Mr. Krabs:
I'm warning ya!

Plankton:
[turns page] ...A cup of love...

Mr. Krabs:
Don't do it!

Plankton:
...mixed together with the most important ingredient of all... four heaping pounds of freshly ground...! [turns page and it has Plankton picture] ...Plankton!?! [Plankton stares wide eyed at the formula and looks at Mr. Krabs]

Mr. Krabs:
I warned ya.

Plankton:
[running out of the Krusty Krab and back to the Chum Bucket] WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

[Back in the Krusty Krab, the book falls on the ground and the family reads the recipe and gasps; they all run screaming in whole terror while Mr. Krabs laughs, except for Clem who just stands staring at the book]

Mr. Krabs:
Hey. Why ain't you running?

Clem:
Well, I can't read.

Mr. Krabs:
Get out of here! [Clem runs away laughing goofily while Mr. Krabs gets himself out of the toilet; Squidward reveals that he wasn't murdered by Plankton's army, but he is alive and comes out of the toilet as well as he rubs his head; SpongeBob arrives while holding a mop]

SpongeBob:
Hey, guys. Did I miss anything? [Squidward picks up the formula]

Squidward:
Mr. Krabs, is this really the secret ingredient for the Krabby Patty?

Mr. Krabs:
Of course not! [points to the Chum Bucket] And Plankton will probably figure that out and be back again to find out what the real formula is. But don't worry, boys. The formula's safe from harm. I got it hidden in me most secret hiding place - a place no one, not even Plankton, would ever figure out! [Mr. Krabs starts laughing and hopping up and down]

Squidward:
Let me guess. It's at home, under your mattress.

Mr. Krabs:
[gasps and runs to his house, screaming] Curse you, Squidward! [episode ends]

Mr. Krabs:
Well, SpongeBob, looks like you've finally found your calling.

SpongeBob:
I'll say. I'm so glad I gave up fry cooking for this.

Mr. Krabs:
What did I tell ya about those hooks, boy?!

SpongeBob:
I-I-I...

Patrick:
I'll tell ya about the hooks. You ride 'em up, and up, and up, then you gently float down.

Mr. Krabs:
And do ya know what happens when ya don't float back down?

SpongeBob:
Gift shop?

Mr. Krabs:
Worse! Ya end up vacuum-packed, in a can of tuna! With nothin' to look forward to but the smell of mayonnaise!

Mr. Krabs:
What don't you understand about "More"!? [multiple of SpongeBobs are watching jellyfishes] MORE! MORE! More! More! More. More! More! [grimaces and demands more] More, more, more, more, more! MORE!!

[Cut to night. A sign reading "Jellyfish Fields:
Population 4" is seen. The word "000,000" is crossed out]

SpongeBob:
Well, there's no more! Now, that's jellyfishing!

[No Name follows SpongeBob.]

Mr. Krabs:
What's the meaning of this, SpongeBob?!

SpongeBob:
We're in serious danger. There's a-a-a...a monster out there.

Mr. Krabs:
Is it a paying customer?

SpongeBob:
Oh no, Mr. Krabs. It doesn't want to eat Krabby Patties. It wants to eat you!

Patrick:
[crying] Just like it ate Wormy!

Squidward:
Um, Wormy? [SpongeBob and Patrick cry]

SpongeBob:
Why? Why? He was so young.

Patrick:
We’ll never forget you, Wormy.

Squidward:
Well, if Moron Theater's over, I think I'll just take a look at this "monster."

Mr. Krabs:
What? You mean all this was one of your goofball schemes?

Plankton:
Now, now, Krabs, SpongeBob has taught us important life lessons, such as, oh, how to fall out of an airplane for instance.

Mr. Krabs:
Yeah, and how to comically bludgeon myself.

Plankton:
In fact, I think it's time we repay him, don't you?

Mr. Krabs:
Great idea, pal. [clenches fists together. Plankton does the same] We'll teach you about teamwork. [hops on top of Plankton who carries him. SpongeBob runs away screaming] Get back here! [Plankton chases SpongeBob while carrying Mr. Krabs]

Plankton:
We should do this more often, Krabs.

Mr. Krabs:
Where are your shoes? You're not going section 8 on me, are you?

SpongeBob:
It's so hot, my shoes...my shoes melted off.

Mr. Krabs:
Where could they be? They shoulda been here hours ago! Yargh, if I don't make any money today, I'll surely break out in a rash!

SpongeBob:
[offscreen] Yipee! I'm rich, Patrick, look! Eight gold doubloons!

Mr. Krabs:
Wait! I saw it first! [leaps through the air and lands on the table where SpongeBob and Patrick are playing a game] Mine! Mine! [realizing] Huh?

SpongeBob:
Boy, Mr. Krabs, you sure are sweaty.

Mr. Krabs:
Why, that's the most diabolical Krabby Patty ever spawned!

SpongeBob:
I call it...the Nasty Patty!

Mr. Krabs:
Win this one for the Krusty Krab!

SpongeBob:
[runs forward] FOR THE KRUSTY KRAB!

Plankton:
Win this one because I told you to!

Patrick:
[runs forward as well] BECAUSE HE TOLD ME TOOOOOOOOO!

Mr. Krabs:
Yes, every year that Ringmaster Mudkrab rolls into town and steals me customers. But this year he's parked his shabby tent show right on me property.

Man:
[drives by with girl] Hey, let's get a Krabby Patty.

Woman:
No, [points to circus] let's go to the circus instead. [they drive off, Mr. Krabs starts growling, on fire, slaps SpongeBob's watering can out of his hand]

Squidward:
Well, since there's no [points to the right] work, [begins to walk away] I'll be going.

Mr. Krabs:
To the circus. [sticks out tongue, takes ticket]

Squidward:
[stops walking] To the circus?

SpongeBob:
To the circus!

Mr. Krabs:
To destroy it. [laughs evilly]

Squidward:
To destroy it?

SpongeBob:
To destroy it! [record scratches, confused] To destroy it?

Mr. Krabs:
No, no, [pats SpongeBob's head] boy-o, not destroy. I said "enjoy." We're going to enjoy the circus.

SpongeBob:
Oh. [Patrick falls from the sky]

Patrick:
[grabs SpongeBob and Squidward] Yay! We're going to the circus!

Mr. Krabs:
And it'll be fun [face contorts] for all ages. [laughs wickedly]

Mr. Krabs:
You guys wouldn't know a good time if it bit you in the aft! I'm going home! You guys ain't cool, you're lame!!

SpongeBob:
[gasps] Lame?

Mr. Krabs:
Lame! You're nerds, geeks, creeps and babies.

SpongeBob and Patrick:
Not 'babies.' [suck their thumbs]

Mr. Krabs:
I may be old, but even an old bag of shells like me knows that you haven't suggested one cool thing all night. So good night to ya. [starts to leave]

Patrick:
I guess you're gonna miss the panty raid.

Mr. Krabs:
The what?

Patrick:
I said I guess you're gonna miss the panty raid.

Mr. Krabs:
Panty raid? [walks back to them] You're talkin' about girls, right? [pause] Girl girls?

Patrick:
Yeah.

Mr. Krabs:
And you're talking about raiding their dressers...for their underpants, right?

Patrick:
Oh, yeah.

Mr. Krabs:
Well, count me in. If this works, I'll take back what I said about you two bein' lame.

SpongeBob and Patrick:
Not lame!

Mr. Krabs:
[angrily] All right boys! YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO NOW?!

SpongeBob:
[scared] You mean our butts?

Patrick:
Can I use mine one last time?

[Mr. Krabs takes his dollar and gives it one great big lick. When he puts it back on the wall, every last trace of paint and crayon is gone]

Mr. Krabs:
[satisfied] There we go, good as new.

[Patrick and SpongeBob are dumbfounded, and start babbling]

Mr. Krabs:
Yeah, I lied. This paint actually comes off with saliva.

SpongeBob:
[beaming] Oh, I get it, Mr. Krabs. You told us the paint was permanent so me and Patrick would be more careful and not get paint on anything!

Mr. Krabs:
Nah, I just like to mess with ya!

[Mr. Krabs bursts into gales of laughter. SpongeBob and Patrick both scowl, and walk out the front door in a huff. Mr. Krabs laughs so hard that saliva sprays out of his mouth, causing the paint to ooze down his walls. When he's finally stopped laughing enough to see what's going on, his house is a mess]

Mr. Krabs:
Aw, crud. I really gotta learn to say it, not spray it.

Mr. Krabs:
[checks his mirror which says, "Objects in Mirror Will Be Expensive." mirror pans to The Krusty Krab entrance and a sign saying "Broken Wall" appears] Oh, broken wall. [a sign saying "$15,000" appears] That's about $15,000. [the mirror pans to the inside of The Krusty Krab where smoke is coming out of the kitchen window and a sign saying "Kitchen Fire" appears] Oh, kitchen fire. [a sign saying "$6,523.87" appears] Oh, that'll be about 6 grand. Oh! A lawsuit? [mirror pans to Squidward hitting Harold on the head with a spatula and a sign saying "Lawsuit" appears along with a sign saying "$150,000,000,000."] Oh, that's a lot of zeroes! Oh. [his eyes deflate, but they quickly return back to normal]

[bubble transition to the boat breaking a "One Way" sign as Mr. Krabs gasps, then screams with SpongeBob as SpongeBob drives the wrong way on the road, avoiding other boats and a gasoline truck. The boat then goes out of control for a few seconds before stopping on the road again]

SpongeBob:
Well, at least I didn't hit the Krusty Krab that time. [chuckles nervously. The scene cuts to the other boats that were avoiding Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob crashing into the Krusty Krab, including the gasoline truck which destroys the Krusty Krab in a fiery explosion and leaving a charred Squidward left standing]

Mr. Krabs:
[looks around and sees a thermostat] Hmm. That thermostat, that'll do. Now all we need is a distraction.

SpongeBob:
Don't worry, Mr. Krabs! [takes out two ice cream scoops] I've got it handled. [jumps out and poses] Ta-da! [plays the spoons to upbeat music] Oh, yeah! Check me out! Uh-huh, uh-huh.

Green goon:
It's so lame, but I can't take my eyes off the guy!

Goobfather:
I can feel the rhythm of his scoops in my soul!

SpongeBob:
Oh, this is the tricky part!

Mr. Krabs:
[looks at watch] You two have ten hours. [SpongeBob keeps marching in the background] And since you're the artistic type, you get to design it.

Squidward:
[excited] Design? Okay! [skeptical] Wait, what's the budget?

Mr. Krabs:
Well, that's the best part! [pinches claws together] Zero budget! You get to be creative and use your imagerination.

SpongeBob:
[waves his broom over Squidward's head, creating a rainbow] Imagination! [rainbow falls on Squidward, turning him rainbow, and he shakes it off in frustration]

Mr. Krabs:
[laughs] Can't wait to see your masterpiece. [walks away] Have fun, you two. [laughs]

Mr. Krabs:
[Mr. Krabs approaches SpongeBob from behind] SpongeBob, what are you doing here? You were supposed to be at work two hours ago! [cut to a massive line of customers at the Krusty Krab]

Frank:
Hello? Anybody here? Hello?! [turns around to face the other customers] Do you guys know how to make a Krabby Patty?

Dave:
No, but I do know how to open a cash register!

Mr. Krabs:
[on the phone] Donate to the Children's Fund? Why? What have children ever done for me?

SpongeBob:
[ripping phone away] You want your dime back?! TAKE IT! Now Squidward can come back, right?

[Mr. Krabs inspects the dime]

Mr. Krabs:
Wrong! That ain't me first dime!

SpongeBob:
Then have some more dimes! I'VE GOT PLENTY OF 'EM!

Mr. Krabs:
You can't put a price on me first dime! And I can't forgive that thieving bilge rat Squidward for stealing it!

[SpongeBob seizes Mr. Krabs by the throat and lifts him up into the air]

SpongeBob:
Listen, you crustaceous cheapskate! Squidward's been living at my house, driving me crazy! [shaking Mr. Krabs] AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO HIRE HIM BACK, ALL BECAUSE OF A STUPID DIME?!!

Mr. Krabs:
[thinking SpongeBob and Patrick are gone forever] Boys! I wasn't quick enough. They're gone! [on the verge of tears] Oh, if I could only hold them in me arms again, I'd-I'd--

[SpongeBob and Patrick float down in front of him, and anger replaces his sadness]

Mr. Krabs:
I'd throttle 'em! What'd I tell you about those hooks, boy?!

SpongeBob:
I-I--

Patrick:
I'll tell you about the hooks! You ride 'em up and up and up...then you gently float down.

Mr. Krabs:
[in Patrick's face] And do you know what happens when you don't float back down?

SpongeBob:
Gift shops!

Mr. Krabs:
Worse! You end up vacuum-packed in a can of tuna! With nothing to look forward to but the smell of mayonnaise!

[Bloody murder is heard in the background]

Mr. Krabs:
[while knocking on the door] Barnacles! Open up, yo- you- Huh. Aha! [Mr. Krabs laughs and grunts while going through the mail slot. Then, he falls into a puddle. Mr. Krabs notices an open window and climbs towards it; muttering] Ugh, and I told him to check the windows, didn't I?

SpongeBob:
[on the phone] Patrick, you've gotta come over to Krabs' place. Someone's trying to break in! [Patrick mumbles] Uh, SquarePants. [Patrick mumbles again] SpongeBob SquarePants. [Patrick mumbles again] No, you're Patrick! [a realistic close-up of SpongeBob's face] Please hurry.

Mr. Krabs:
[Mr. Krabs keeps climbing towards the window. Then, he notices Patrick jumping in puddles with his boots.] Huh? Patrick? What's that pink clown doing here? Eh, who cares? SpongeBob will never open the door for him.

Patrick:
[Patrick gets to the door] Beep, beep, [Patrick removes his boots] beep.

Mr. Krabs:
Great horn spoon! How's he doing that?

[Patrick puts his butt through the mail slot while SpongeBob pulls from the other side of the door. They both crash into the wall.]

SpongeBob:
[laughs] Thank goodness you don't have any bones, buddy.

Patrick:
Nope, all blubber. [close-up on Patrick while he laughs]