Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #228

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104 — There are currently 5,755 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Sheriff: You got kids? Ew! Gross! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hurshe: Just a sec! Just, uh, powdering my vaginas! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Sheriff: The Lord broke the mold when he made your lady parts. Sheriff: There is mold everywhere! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Meemaw: Did you file the missing pecker report with the Sheriff? Hambrosia: My husband is the Sheriff. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
[Sheriff saws Hurshe trying to hang herself] Sheriff: [thinking] What a glorious creature. I never noticed how you move. Like the angel of a thousand gazelles...on ice...in a hand cream commercial...during a three hour documentary on love at first sight. I could watch you all day. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Sheriff: Remember when I told you I wasn't just marrying you 'cause I thought you were gonna inherit the whole town and then I could take that money? Hambrosia: Of course, those were you're wedding vows. Sheriff: Well...I'm afraid my words are coming back to bite off a little more of my ass than they can chew. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hambrosia: Newspapers makes more sense when you read it upside down. It's topsy turvy world man. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
[Sheriff tells Hurshe that Hurlan let a Mexican in their town] Sheriff: He let a Mexican in the town! Hurshe: He let a Mexican in the town?! That's probably why my room stinks! Hurshe: You know, this Mexican's probably the one who stole your wallet! [Hurshe literally snatched the Sheriff's wallet without even noticing] Sheriff: MY WALLET'S, GONE TOO?! Hurshe: Oh, everything's gone to hell since that Mexican come to town. He's ruined my life! He's probably the one who stole my self-respect! Hurshe: Look at me! I'm disgusting! I used to be special. Now my hoohaw just makes beans. He did this! [sobbing] [Hurshe's butt spills out massive bean sounds inside of her clothes] – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
My Mommy the Crow: A Mommy spends her whole life telling everyone what they want to hear, but no one asks the Mommy what she wants to hear. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hurlan: I appreciate you all taking a interest in my edubation. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hambrosia: I'm pulling the plug on this butts party. Hurshe: You can't shut my place down! I got protection from the devil's greatest smokescreen -- Religious freedom. Hambrosia: What religion is you? Hurshe: We're Chawstafarians. Tobaccy's our sacred herb, and we baptize our sins in the divine saliva of our holy water. Hambrosia: I swear on the life of my precious tar-baby, I'll end this obamanation. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Doc: Have you ever done tobacco? Hambrosia: Why did I sin?! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
The Reverend: How long have you been having these urges? Hurlan: About as long as I can remember. About five minutes. The Reverend: You're having certain feelings? Hurlan: Uh-huh. The Reverend: You're dancing around the topic! How long you been into dance? Hurlan: I'm confused. The Reverend: On a spray tan to calf implants, how confused are you? Hurlan: I just though I smelled meat. The Reverend: No! That is the stench of denial. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hurlan: [snoring] Oh, yeah, that smells good. [snoring] Let's wake him up. [snoring] Hit him in the head with your pecker and I'll take a picture. That'll be real funny. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
The Reverend: Tain't nothing fruitier than beef. That is why I have gone on a strict banana and big nut diet. The Reverend: How do you know that animal you're eating hasn't had homosensual thoughts? It happens to the best of us a thousand times a day. The Reverend: God put us here to repress every national urge - Hambrosia: Yes. Restraint... The Reverend: Now, God made Adam and Eve. He did not made Adam and Beef -- Hambrosia: OH, RESTRAINT! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
The Reverend: I have cut off my meat for the Lord! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
My Mommy the Crow: If God is everywhere, his mouth is on your dingus at all times. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hambrosia: I called the order of the 658th weekly support group for women who are genitally useless. [cuts to the next scene where no women are in her group but herself] Hambrosia: That concludes the 658th -- – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
[as Sheriff was about to kill Hambrosia] Hambrosia: Look at what you're terrible parenting has caused! Take care of it. Sheriff: I'll do what my daddy did when he caught me smoking. Sheriff: [to her tar-baby] He took me out to the woods, and he slit my throat. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hambrosia: I finally realize disabled people are normal. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hurlan: Preacher? [echoes] Anybody? [echoes] Society? – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
The Reverend: The Gaybegone tribe lived in harmony with denying their nature. They knew that if gayness wasn't nipped in the bud, all of society would be wiped out forever. The Reverend: Now we need to lay you on these hot coals and focus your mind. [Hurlan lays into the hot coals] Hurlan: [sniffs] Is somebody barbecuing chump chops? The Reverend: Oh, uh, no! All meat is a gateway to the queerpocolypse and the homogeddon. Hurlan: Well, that's fascinating. [snoring] The Reverend: Now we must pray all the gayness away with the ancient tribal fauxhawk chant. The Reverend: Nohomo Nohomo No. Nohomo Nohomo No. – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Boss Hoss: I have terrible news. Your brother done disappeared. I'm sure he's fine, but you are the man in charge until we find his corpse. The Sheriff is on the case. He'll find Hurlan. Hambrosia: Me, in charge? I've waited my whole life for this moment! And now that its -- Boss Hoss: [interrupt] You just keep talkin' sweetheart, I gotta drain the main vein in my penis. [snoring] Hambrosia: I've restrained every natural impulse in my life, and now that I'm in charge, I can finally cut loose. [big band music plays while it changes to heavy metal music in a second] – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago
Hambrosia: Don't! Stop! Don't...Stop! [moans] Don't...Stop. Oh, hands! – The Heart, She Holler Movie Quote	added 1 year ago

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