Wikidude's Quotes Page #5,497

Here's the list of quotes submitted by wikidude  —  There are currently 140,397 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Michael:
[about his tuppence] I want it to feed the birds.

Mr. Dawes Sr:
Fiddlesticks, boy. Feed the birds and what have you got? Fat birds. But...

[sings] If you invest your tuppence wisely

in the bank safe and sound,

soon, the tuppence, safely invested in the bank,

will compound.

And you'll achieve that sense of conquest as you affluence expands

in the hands of the directors who invest... [coughs] ...As propriety... [coughs again] ...Demands. [coughs once more]

George:
May I, Sir?

Mr. Dawes Sr:
Carry on, Banks.

Mary Poppins  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[After Jane and Michael realized that the man who startled them was only Bert as a chimney sweep for the day]

Jane:
Bert. It's you.

Bert:
In the flesh and at your service.

Michael:
You're filthy.

Bert:
Oh. Perhaps a smudge or two? It so happens that today, I'm a chimney sweep.

Jane:
Oh, Bert, we're so frightened!

Bert:
Now, now, don't take on so. Bert will look after you. Like I was your own father. Now who's after you?

Jane:
Father is.

Bert:
What?

Mary Poppins  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Jane and Michael have just told Bert that the run on the bank is their fault.]

Bert:
Let's sit down. You know, begging you pardon, but the one who my heart goes out for is your father. There he is in that cold, heartless bank day after day, hemmed in by mounds of cold, heartless money. I don't like to see any living thing caged up.

Jane:
Father? In a cage?

Bert:
They makes cages in all sizes and shapes, you know. Bank-shaped some of 'em, carpets and all.

Jane:
But Father isn't in trouble, we are.

Bert:
Oh, sure about that, are you? Look at it this way. You've got your mother to look after you. And Mary Poppins and Constable Jones and me. Who looks after your father? Tell me that. When something terrible happens, what does he do? Fends for himself, he does. Who does he tell about it? No one! Don't blab his troubles at home. He just pushes on at his job, uncomplaining and alone and silent.

Michael:
He's not very silent.

Jane:
Michael, be quiet. And Bert, do you think father really needs our help?

Bert:
Well, Jane, it's not my place to say. [the three of them stand up] I only observe that a father can always do it with a bit of help. Come on, I'll take you home.

Mary Poppins  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hawkeye:
Nurse, you got a clamp?

Lt. Dish:
Yes.

Hawkeye:
Scratch my nose.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[While making out]

Lt. Dish:
I made a vow to myself that while I was gone, I was going to be-- I was going to be faithful to my husband.

Hawkeye:
Those are the vows you make when you're with somebody.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Duke:
Well, listen, uh, where were you when you were drafted? I was just curious.

Trapper:
Back home. I told you before.

Duke:
No, I mean, what were you doing? Were you, like, a resident, or on staff someplace?

Trapper:
Mmm.

Duke:
Where?

Trapper:
Hospital.

Duke:
Which hospital?

Trapper:
Back home.

Duke:
[To Hawkeye] Is there some reason I shouldn't know which hospital?

Hawkeye:
I don't know. I will ask. Is there some reason my friend should not know the name of the hospital?

[Trapper pops his gum and shrugs.]

Hawkeye:
There doesn't appear to be any reason. I've seen you somewhere before. I don't know your name, stranger, but your face is familiar. Have you always had that mustache?

[Trapper smirks and shakes his head.]

Hawkeye:
Hmm.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hawkeye:
Duke, did I ever tell you how Androscoggin College beat Dartmouth in a raging blizzard, six to nothing, because I intercepted a pass?

Duke:
Yeah, you told me.

Hawkeye:
They had this great passer, see? [Trapper John shrugs, smiling] And we held them nothing-nothing till the last 20 seconds, and then snow and all, he let one go. And it went sailing . . . boom!

Trapper:
Lucky your mouth wasn't open, it would have got stuck in your throat.

Hawkeye:
Oh, baby! How are you, Trapper John McIntyre?

Trapper:
I thought you'd never remember.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Trapper Painless Polish Day in the shower tent?

Hawkeye:
Walt Waldowski, the dentist.

Trapper:
Well, what, are those guys waiting to scrub his back or something?

Hawkeye:
No, no. Old Painless is what we call the, ah, "best equipped dentist in the army".

Surgeon:
[as he walks away from the shower] I'd dearly love to see that angry!

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[After Trapper punches Frank Burns]

Col. Blake:
Well, what's wrong with you?

Trapper:
I don't know. I must have lost my punch. I never expected the son of a bitch to get up!

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Referring to Major Houlihan]

Trapper:
Well, what's the matter with her today?

Hawkeye:
Oh, I don't know. I think it's one of those ladies' things.

Trapper:
It's not like her to act like this. She's a bitch. Look at my new flannel-- I think she's going to have a nervous breakdown.

Hawkeye:
She can't even get out of the door.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Frank Burns leaps over the mess table and tackles Hawkeye]

Hawkeye:
Get him off me! I've got glasses. Get him off me!

Duke:
What's going on, Frank? That lesson one?

Hawkeye:
Frank Burns has gone nuts! I'm wearing glasses, for God's sake!

Trapper:
Watch out for your goodies, Hawkeye. That man is a sex maniac. I don't think Hot Lips satisfied him. Don't let him kiss you, Hawkeye!

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Father Mulcahy tells Hawkey that Painless has a problem.]

Hawkeye:
What do you mean? What is it?

Father Mulcahy:
Well, what is it? It's difficult to talk about, you see, because I learned about his problem in confession.

Hawkeye:
Oh, and you can't--

Father Mulcahy:
I can't divulge…

Hawkeye:
Can you give me a hint?

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Gathered at Painless's suicide feast.]

Duke:
Now then, y'all come here to say your final farewell to ol' Walt here.

Trapper John:
Farewell Walt.

Duke:
Dear ol' Walt. You know, I got an idea that maybe it's not such a final farewell after all. I think maybe ol' Walt's going on into the unknown to do a little recon work for us all.

Hawkeye:
I just-- I just wanna say one thing. Uh, nobody ordered Walt to go on this mission. He volunteered for certain death.

Duke:
That's true.

Hawkeye:
That's what we award our highest medals for.

Duke:
That's beautiful.

Hawkeye:
That's what being a soldier is all about.

Trapper:
Oh yeah.

Capt. Bandini:
Here! Here!

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Hot Lips:
That man is a prisoner of war, Doctor.

Trapper:
So are you, sweetheart, but you don't know it.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Duke:
I'm kind of partial to blonde myself.

Hawkeye:
I knew it! I knew you had a-- had an attraction for Hot Lips Houlihan

Trapper:
Here! Here!

Duke:
Go to hell, Captain Pierce. You know I damn near puke every time I look at her. Besides she's-- I'll bet she's not a real blonde.

Hawkeye:
How dare you say that about an officer of the United States Army!

Duke:
I'll not only say it, but I'll back it with 20 bucks. How's that?

Hawkeye:
You have yourself a bet, sir. [To Trapper] You're my witness.

Trapper:
I'll be your witness, but who's gonna be the poor schmuck who finds out?

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Trapper:
Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. Ham and eggs will all right. Steak would be even better. And then give me at least one nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.

Capt. Peterson:
[Outraged] Oh! [She turns to leave and bumps into Nurse] Oh! Fool! [She stomps off]

Nurse:
How do you want your steak cooked?

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Me Lay:
Who are you?

Hawkeye:
I'm Dr. Jekyll, actually. This is my friend, Mr. Hyde.

[Trapper grunts]

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[Caught by the MPs]

Trapper:
Finally caught up with us, huh?

Hawkeye:
Where did we fail?

Trapper:
I don't know, I think it was the woman. Something tells me I've seen her someplace before.

Hawkeye:
She was the one in Tangiers.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[the starter's pistol goes off at the football game]

Hot Lips:
Oh my God! They've shot him!

Colonel Blake:
Hot Lips, you incredible nincompoop! It's the end of the quarter.

MASH  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Rocky Dennis:
[smashing some plates] I hate you going out every night and coming home wasted all the time!

Rusty Dennis:
It's none of your goddamn business!

Rocky Dennis:
You're my mother!

Rusty Dennis:
Well, you're not my warden!

Mask  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

[after Rocky gave an impressive speech on how the Trojan War started]

Eric:
That wasn't bad, Dennis. How about you tutor me?

Rocky Dennis:
Tutor you?

Eric:
Yeah, Cooley almost failed me last year.

Rocky Dennis:
OK, but it will cost you three bucks an hour.

Eric:
[surprised] Three bucks?

[The classroom falls silent and looks back at the two because of the sudden outburst]

Rocky Dennis:
Hey, I don't work for free.

Eric:
[kinda tense] It's a deal.

Mask  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Gar:
Rocky, you mom sometimes does the wrong things, but for the right reasons.

Rocky Dennis:
You always stick up to her, Gar, and then she pisses you off, and you split. Then you come back.

Mask  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Amusement park. Rocky and his biker family want to go on the bumper cars.

Carnie:
I cannot be responsible for anything that happens to the retard.

Gar:
Then I cannot be responsible for anything I do to you!

Carnie freezes as Gar grabs him

Gar{controlled voice}:
Take the tickets.

Mask  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

Rocky Dennis:
Grandma! Grandpa! How are you?

Abe Dennis:
Doing great Rocky. Checks out Rocky's baseball card collection of the 1955 Brooklyn Dodgers Your team is good, but I have always said the backbone of a good team is a...center fielder! Presents Rocky with the rare baseball card he had been searching a long time for

Rocky Dennis:
Hey! Thanks so much!

Mask  Movie Quote

added 5 years ago

We need you!

Help us build the largest authors community and quotes collection on the web!

Quiz

Are you a quotes master?

»
Who wrote the Republic?
A Kennedy
B Plato
C Socrates
D Aristotel