Chief:
You really f***ed up, Assy. The Mayor's in hot water over this air marshal disaster. They're cutting funding for the whole program, and that puts our national security risk!
Assy McGee:
What a shame.
Chief:
I could have your badge for that [bleep] you pulled up there.
Assy McGee:
Must have been the thin air, Chief.
Chief:
I got to hand it to you, though. How the hell did you know that woman was one of the biggest drug mules in the country?
Assy McGee:
Simple, Chief. I noticed when I arrived a woman entering the security check. She broke a heel, causing a distraction. Then at the bar, the same woman handed a bag by the TSA guy.
Assy McGee:
Later on the plane, I noticed a wrist tattoo -- White flower, official symbol of the castillian syndicate -- Run heroin from Afghanistan through Turkey to Spain then to the U.S. also, she was wearing heels again. How many women break heels and then carry an extra pair?
Assy McGee:
Later, when I'm bumping her rhythmically from behind, I ask where she's from?
Chief:
What she say?
Assy McGee:
She replied "Middletown, New Jersey."
Chief:
So?
Assy McGee:
So, there is no Middletown, New Jersey.
Chief:
Yes, there is. I'm from Metuchen. Middletown's right near there.
Assy McGee:
You sure?
Chief:
We used to play Middletown in hockey. YES, I'M F***ING SURE!
Assy McGee:
Anyway, she was smuggling drugs in her rectum. Made her sick.
Chief:
But why'd you kill the Stewardess, McGee?
Assy McGee:
She wouldn't have sex in the lavatory. Now, if you'll excuse me, I got a date with some pilots.