Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #150

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,280 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Assy McGee:
Saw you give goldilocks some hairy eyeball back there.

Sanchez:
Me? No, come on. I'm a happily married guy.

Assy McGee:
Doesn't mean you can't sniff the produce. [sniffs, then farts]

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[a limped woman suddenly cries for help while interrupting the ceremony]

Mayor:
How dare that son of a bitch serial pervert strike right in the middle of my fantastic piazza? [to the Security Guard] Get our esteemed police chief on the phone right away. Damn you, serial perveeerrrrrt!

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Denie:
[sobbing] ...Yet the ice cream truck never stopped.

Mayor:
Wonderful, Denie. Thank you so much for sharing your feelings with everybody here today. Thanks to my efforts, no child will ever be viciously squishes by a car here again,

Mayor:
Because from now on, all vehicles will have to slow down for, and I give you now...Bobby's Bump -- A speed bump dedicated to the memory of that dead child. And there, of course, memorialized forever, is Bobby himself.

Mayor:
How did that truck not see him?

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

DiLorenzo:
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! What time is it? Hey, Glen, put it on Channel 2. The Mayor's ceremony is on. Come on, man. It's our freakin' mayor. Let's go. Hurry up! Don't you have any respect? Hey, everyone, Glen don't have any respect for our freakin' mayor.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Sanchez:
You know, what you did for me back there, you know -- I'm not gonna forget that.

Assy McGee:
What are you talking about, Sanchez?

Sanchez:
I shot that guy, and then you put a gun at me--

Assy McGee:
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Cool it.

Sanchez:
[whisper] And then you put a gun in his hand. That's totally illegal.

Assy McGee:
Winners write history, Sanchez. Illegal? Nothing but a sick bird.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Sanchez:
Hey, is the "G" capitalized in "McGee"?

Pegfinger:
Whoa. Who ordered the obese gardener?

Sanchez:
Nice try, Mr. Finger. You're not getting inside my coconut.

Pegfinger:
Oh -- Wedding ring. How many oranges did you have to pick to pay for that? [laughs]

Sanchez:
YOU SON OF A BITCH!

[Sanchez shoots Pegfinger]

Assy McGee:
Whoa.

Sanchez:
Oh, I freaked up, Assy. I freaked up this time.

Assy McGee:
Cool off, Sanchez.

Sanchez:
I'm gonna lose my job. I'm gonna go to jail.

Assy McGee:
You're in jail, asshole.

Sanchez:
What am I gonna do?

Assy McGee:
Relax. He attacked you.

Sanchez:
What?

[Assy throws a wooden stool on Sanchez]

Sanchez:
Ow!

Assy McGee:
Then he stole your gun. [shoots Sanchez one of the legs]

Sanchez:
OW! DAMN IT, ASSY!

[Assy smashes Sanchez into the glass wall]

Assy McGee:
[punches and kicks him many different ways] Then he kicked you in the yam bag, like this, and like this! And then he did this.

Assy McGee:
You're a hero, Sanchez. Let me buy you a drink.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
Pegfinger.

Pegfinger:
Argh, Assy McGee. Wow. You look like $100, Chief. You been working out?

Assy McGee:
12-ounce curls, Ed. How's tricks? Three hots and a cot's doing you alright?

Pegfinger:
Oh, it's not so much fun flashing meself.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
[to Sanchez] Remember, this guy's a certified criminal genius. Don't let him inside your coconut.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[the police officer touches Assy to see if he has some secret weapons on him]

Assy McGee:
You like that, don't you, you nickel tickler.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
Saddle up your skin planets, Sanchez. We're going upriver.

Sanchez:
What's a skin planet?

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
You seem like a good dad, Chief.

Chief:
Where the hell have you bozos been?

Assy McGee:
Church ran along.

Chief:
Yeah, well, the front page scream every rag in town, "Pervert flasher strikes again. Won attacked in subway." We might have that pirate who was assaulting women out there.

Assy McGee:
Impossible. I bought that sick bastard a one-way to stony lonesome 10 years ago.

Chief:
Yeah. That's why I want you to see if he's got prints on this. Looks like some kinds of copycat situation going on. Mayor needs this fire pissed on pronto.

Assy McGee:
Sanchez here can't get an erection.

Sanchez:
That's not true, Chief.

Assy McGee:
Yes, it is. You told me.

Sanchez:
No, I didn't. I never said that.

Assy McGee:
Well, you implied it.

Sanchez:
I never implied anything about that -- No.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Chief:
[on phone] Yeah. No. Rub some vodka on the head. You'll last for an hour.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
Son of a bitch! Chief wants to see us.

Sanchez:
But it's Sunday.

Assy McGee:
Someone forgot to tell crime.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Sanchez:
Ay, iDios Mio! How about a towel, bro?

Assy McGee:
Relax. You're tighter than ball of Mexican string lately.

Sanchez:
Oh, it's just all this stuff at home -- Domestico stuff.

Assy McGee:
Problems shoving off?

Sanchez:
What? Me? Come on. No, be serious.

Assy McGee:
You should try visual imagery. Think of something hard, like a rock.

Sanchez:
Yeah, I don't have no problems in that department. That's not a problem.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
[humming and urinating] Who the hell sings that?

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Assy McGee:
That's my birthday girl.

Sexy Woman:
Oh, wow. You remembered.

Assy McGee:
Yeah. 47's a special year.

Assy McGee  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[UG makes a sex tape with a vacuum cleaner and a cake]

Uncle Grandfather:
Vacuum cleaner bend cake over. That's right. And then you go...

[uses the vacuum cleaner to hump the cake]

Uncle Grandfather:
That's it. Rated "R."

[humps the cake with the vacuum cleaner again]

Uncle Grandfather:
[standing behind the camera] Frost his bag. Frost his bag. Frost his bag. Oh, my god.

[the Secret Military Policeman arrived]

Uncle Grandfather:
Oh, hi.

Uncle Grandfather:
Can you get this vacuum cleaner how to f*** this cake?

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Young Man:
First I get trapped in a hole with smelly animals who bicker, then my hand is severed, now I have to care for a drunk baby.

Sherman the Giraffe:
W-W-W-We could eat that.

Young Man:
Drunk baby.

Sherman the Giraffe:
Put some sauce on his face.

Young Man:
[to the Baby] I'm afraid you'll have to find another place to live.

Monkey:
Oh, hang on. Baby's got a 12-pack.

Zebra:
Crack-a-lackin!

Sherman the Giraffe:
Don't be stingy. Pop the top, throw it up here.

Young Man:
Oh, you animals are incorrigible.

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Coiffio runs to Cat Man in the store to tell that Gerald is still alive]

Coiffio:
Hey, attention--

[Cat Man shoots Coiffio with a minigun]

Coiffio:
I heard the most disturbing news.

Cat Man:
What?

Coiffio:
Gerald is still alive.

Cat Man:
Who cares?

Coiffio:
Aw, Cat Man. Come on, man. We care.

Cat Man:
I don't.

[awkward pause]

Coiffio:
I care about you, Cat Man.

Cat Man:
Argh.

Coiffio:
Do me a sour, Cat Man. Turn the lights back on in the forest.

Cat Man:
I'm busy.

Coiffio:
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, man. Whenver you get a window, man? [tackles Cat Man] Like RIGHT NOW!

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Baby:
[cries]

Cat Man:
Can I see some I.D.?

Baby:
[cries]

Cat Man:
Ah, just kidding.

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Rod appears at Coiffio's spaceship]

Rod the Anime God:
Psst. Check it out.

Coiffio:
Who the [EFF] are you?

Rod the Anime God:
I'm Ra, the God. How much you want for it?

Coiffio:
What are you talking about?

Rod the Anime God:
Your crib, dude.

Coiffio:
Oh, yeah.

Rod the Anime God:
I love sunken living rooms.

Coiffio:
You have good taste. But first Astronomic Cat must perform...background check.

Astronomic Cat:
[meow]

Coiffio:
Go!

[Astronomic Cat does background check on computer]

Rod the Anime God:
What the hell's that cat doing, man?

Coiffio:
Aw, chill, Ra. I'm sure you'll pass. Ah, 7 years to pay off a hatchback?

Rod the Anime God:
Dude--

Coiffio:
[laughs] That's getting weird.

Rod the Anime God:
Look, I'd love to just hang out here and watch your cat type, uh, the letter "R" 25 times in a row--

Coiffio:
I'm selling this crib, man, based on my silliness over killing the bald Gerald?

Rod the Anime God:
That bald kid? Man, that dude is not dead.

Coiffio:
What?

Rod the Anime God:
Yeah, I just saw him, like, today.

Coiffio:
Yeah, why, so, yeah. [shows him Young Man's hand] I got his hand, man.

Rod the Anime God:
No, come on.

Coiffio:
Hey, Ra, hey, Ra.

Rod the Anime God:
No, you don't.

Coiffio:
What are you talking about?

Rod the Anime God:
I mean, look at all this hair.

Coiffio:
What?

Rod the Anime God:
What you got there is a man hand.

Coiffio:
Oh, no. Oh, no. Don't do this. Come on!

[Rod suddenly start to sneeze Coiffio's spaceship away]

Rod the Anime God:
Oh, man.

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Uncle Grandfather talks on phone with Coiffio]

Uncle Grandfather:
Hello?

Coiffio:
Hey, Nate.

Uncle Grandfather:
Oh, christ.

Coiffio:
Guess what?

Uncle Grandfather:
Why?

Coiffio:
I killed your son. [laughs]

Uncle Grandfather:
What are you talking about?

Coiffio:
I killed him.

Uncle Grandfather:
I don't have a son.

Coiffio:
'CAUSE I KILLED HIM! [laughs]

Uncle Grandfather:
You're retarded.

Coiffio:
I killed him.

Uncle Grandfather:
Oh, god. I gotta go, 'cause--

Coiffio:
'Cause I killed him.

Uncle Grandfather:
Cake and vacuum cleaner are waiting on me.

Coiffio:
Yes.

Uncle Grandfather:
So...leave the message after the tone. [hangs up]

Coiffio:
What? What? Boss. I mean, b-- Boss! BOSS!

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Uncle Grandfather:
Ok, now, cake, you will pretend you are chambermaid, and vacuum cleaner, you're pleasantly surprised. This leads to sex. Ok, quiet, quiet on the set. Quiet. Speed. Happy suck day to me, take--

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Coiffio:
Oh, yeah, what up, pedro? Aeronama! Astro mutt...nut. Space cat, where did you get that hamburger necklace and hand?

Astronomic Cat:
[meow]

Coiffio:
Oh, you've killed Gerald!

Astronomic Cat:
[meow]

Coiffio:
Good, aero nut. What, aero...space cat? Sweet, sweet relief. See, now I can move through FANTASTIC SPACE!

Coiffio:
I give you a treat now, ok?

Astronomic Cat:
[meow]

Perfect Hair Forever  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

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In which movie does this quote appear: "Here's looking at you, kid."?
A Unforgiven
B In the Line of Fire
C Taxi Driver
D Casablanca