Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #157

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 5,773 quotes total — keep up the great work!

[Gary & Claude go inside the sewage to see why there's no souls coming out]

Gary Bunda:
Welp, there's your problem right there.

Claude:
Yeah, obviously. There's a huge beaver dam blocking the river Styx.

[Gary sees a beaver munching on a severed hand]

Gary Bunda:
Oh, look at that. That's so cute. They got, like, a little community.

Claude:
Just grab the dynamite. Let's blow this sh*t up.

Gary Bunda:
Yeah, let's annihilate 'em.

Dr. Mengele:
Wait! I need those beavers! We must not hurt the beavers!

Gary Bunda:
What do you give a sh*t about beavers, Dr. Menegele?

Dr. Mengele:
Gary! Look at this rag!

[Dr. Mengele puts chloroform on the rag onto his face to make Gary feel unconscious]

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[the demon employers check on the clogged pipe sewage]

Claude:
Must be a blockage.

Gary Bunda:
Oh, god. Must be a couple of 660-pound Learning Channel fatties just gumming up the works.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Benji:
You wanna talk the greatest of all time? The fifth "Land Before Time" was the quintessential "Land Before Time."

Gary Bunda:
You're being an asshole, alright? It's the third film.

Benji:
Oh, everyone says the third.

Gary Bunda:
No, it's the third -- Yeah, 'cause it's got the raptors in it, and the pterodactyl in it has got kinda nice breasts.

Benji:
I'm just saying I've seen hundreds of kids' movies. I have sat through hours.

Gary Bunda:
You don't even watch the movies. Weren't -- You're just sitting there -- You're just staring at kids' butts.

Benji:
Sometimes they're ugly, and you've gotta sit through the whole film and wait for the next batch to come in.

Gary Bunda:
You know, my Mom used to drop me off at the theater by myself all the time, and I'm just really glad that I never ran into you.

Benji:
Wait a minute. Where did you grow up? 'Cause I was crazy about redheads.

Gary Bunda:
[pauses] Nah. I would've remembered that.

Benji:
[doubt] Maybe you blocked it out. The mind is very incredible when it comes to erasing traumatic memories. Ask anyone I've ever made love to.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Claude:
Hey, Abbot and Fat Stella, quit grab-assing and get back to work!

Gary Bunda:
I can only gut the souls that are in front of me, Mr. Boss Man.

Claude:
So, rather than get a supervisor, you just shoot the shit for three hours?

Gary Bunda:
Well, he's got a movie blog. [referring to Benji]

Claude:
I know he has a movie blog. [to Benji] You're right about "Land Before Time 5."

Gary Bunda:
[scoffs]

Claude:
Excellent flick.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Shark:
What's this?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
My new record. It's called, um... "F-Off."

Shark:
Is it good?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Mm-hmm.

Shark:
So you've been making records?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
No.

Shark:
'Cause, uh, I've always kind of wanted to be in a band.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
No way. What do you play?

Shark:
I play, uh, with minds. Shh! Go home and think about that. And...don't look under your bed.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Liquor reads Mosquitor's note from camp]

Liquor:
Your Dad and I spent over 10 years and $94,000 putting together my mosquito costume, and now I am pleased to announce that I have become a mosquito. [breaths] The costume is quite realistic, and I have even attached bladders to the nose thing, so I can suck up liquids when I puncture them with my nose thing. I could be buzzing all round you on a hot summer day, and you wouldn't even recognize me as your son child. You would just think, "Get away, Mosquito." [breaths] From my point of view, you would be 3,000 dads because of the way I've designed my eyeballs. I might be saying, "Dad, it's me; Dad, it's me," But you wouldn't be able to understand my language because of its buzzing. I'm also into plastics now. I am making plastic tubes that you can suck liquids through, kind of like my mosquito nose, but used for different reasons. Hope you're doing well at camp. See you soon." Mos--Mos--Mosquito--Mosquitor? Mosq--Mosquiting.

Liquor:
I don't know who that is.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[after Peanut Cop hearing F-Off]

Peanut Cop:
This is...a great song. [chuckles] But I'm here because I'm... [wheezes] did, uh, somebody break in here?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Well, it waasn't us.

[Fitz & Skillet played F-Off again afterwards]

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Skillet:
[squeals]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I'm getting an idea from your yelling mouth, your so yelling mouth.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Skillet:
[squeals]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
That sounds like he was a good dancer, but yet...

[Clock uses time gas on Fitz & Skillet]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
These papers are suddenly useless, and now I must burn them...for a reason I don't know.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Golden Joe appears at the bar]

Golden Joe:
Cheetah, mama. Slap me a sis.

[sees Shark at the bar then disappears immediately]

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Skillet, you're back.

Skillet:
[squeals]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Where have you been?

Skillet:
[squeals]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Well, tell me about the nightmare.

Skillet:
[squeals]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
HOLY SHEE!

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
What are these - These are formulas or...these papers. These papers are driving me crazy. Crazy into the night.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Fitz and Eye comes back to Fitz's house to see the arrow the Spider make]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
See it?

Eye:
I see...not.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
It was right f-ing here. Where the "F" is it? It was a-- It was an f-ing arrow, and it was right the "F" here.

Eye:
Uh-huh. I hungr-eye.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Good. That means you're leaving.

Eye:
That will happen. Now.

[Eye escapes through Fitz's window]

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Bug starts to set cameras]

Shark:
Set up the cameras. No, the 50 millimeter. Yes, the only ones we have, the hidden ones.

Bug:
[robot noises]

Shark:
Ugh! I'm still lookin' at you not setting up the cameras. I'm, you know, just planning my day.

Shark:
How long do you think I'll be watching you not do what I told you to do?

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
What's up, G.A.'s?

Rhoda:
Nothin'.

Eye:
I saw you crash.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I'm sure that you did, 'cause you seem to see everything.

Eye:
Affirmative.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I see you see you mean we. Come with me and fly away.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Rhoda:
You know where it is, and I'm not saying this is what I think, know, or have heard to be true. Seriously, but Liquor said that Mouse is up to his cans.

Eye:
W-eye-rd.

Rhoda:
Yeah, not only that, the new guy, I heard he got out, right, like someone got him out, and he got a thing for squirrels. I'm not talking as thought he's cheesy green up on 'em. I'm saying more like equadorian sleep, if you get the picture.

Eye:
Piiiicture.

Rhoda:
Oh, and another thing, Rooster-- You know Rooster? Up on the farm guy? Alright, well, Liquor also says that a letter accidentally got delivered to him, but before he could open it, BOOM! Just like that, Clock shows up. Next thing he remembers, it's Day 97.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Fitz picks up the phone]

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Hello?

Shark:
Hey, it's me -- Your buddy. How are you?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I couldn't be busier.

Shark:
Doing what?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I'm...I'm on this phone.

Shark:
That's fair. I'll call you back when you're not on the phone.

Shark:
Um, when will you be not on the phone?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I'm not on the phone talking...to the phone.

Shark:
That works.

[Shark hangs up a second later, until he call Fitz back]

Shark:
Hey, it's, um, it's me again. Are you -- Are you not on the phone...still?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
No.

Shark:
Is that a yes?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
It is? Then, yes.

Shark:
If I were you, I would not check my icebox. I wouldn't check yours either.

[Fitz goes by his fridge and sees a cold phone ringing]

Shark:
What's in there in the icebox? Get on your little, tiny mousy tiptoes.

Shark:
Tell me what's in the icebox.

[Fitz didn't answer]

Shark:
Hello? Mouse?

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[after Dustin's show was cancelled, they decided to put him in the workplace while being stuck in a high jumping pose for eternity]

Gary Bunda:
Hey, buddy. How's it hanging? [laughs]

Dizzay:
Is that your penis on his forehead?

Gary Bunda:
Yeah, to scale.

Dizzay:
Oh.

Gary Bunda:
I'm gonna get some markers. We're gonna add some shit.

Dizzay:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Gary Bunda:
Just enough to get us in trouble.

Dizzay:
Hey, grab me one!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Satan:
I just wanted to tell you I really, really love the direction the show is going.

Dustin Diamond:
Thank you.

Satan:
And I've decided to green light it for a thousand seasons.

Dustin Diamond:
A thousand seasons?

Dustin & Satan:
RAZZLEBERRIES!

[Dustin & Satan do a jumping up high pose while the credits come along, ironically Satan was just messing with him when he stop posing while Dustin wasn't]

Satan:
Yeah, I'm kidding. It's cancelled.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Gary Bunda:
Here are your eyeballs.

Audience:
[groans]

Gary Bunda:
I feel terrible about myself. I always wanted to see life through the eyes of a child, but this is ridiculous.

Audience:
[not amused]

Satan:
Yeah, sorry, buddy. After this whole child-eye thing, your character's just not testing well with audiences.

Gary Bunda:
I got like, 15 seasons left in me.

Satan:
[reading the post comments] "He was funnier when he was fatter".

Gary Bunda:
We'll write a scene where I'm handling a puppy! Where I save a puppy from a bunch of snakes!

Satan:
What is that?

[cuts to the scene where it shows a thermostat in Satan's office that explains why Hell is freezing all over the circle]

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
Well, I'll be damned. It's a thermostat. Somebody must have nudged it.

[Satan turns up the temperature leaving to it's rightful place]

Satan:
[laughing] Snow is stopping.

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
[acting] Boy, is our electrical bill gonna go through the roof.

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
[to Gary] Take these and go.

[Satan gives Gary back the eyeballs]

Audience:
[applause]

Satan:
[to the Audience] The eyes have it!

Audience:
[laughter]

Gary Bunda:
That was funny. I guess Eye'll be going.

Audience:
[booing]

Gary Bunda:
That was funny.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

[Gary starts to disguise a blind person to rip Levi's eyes out]

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
Thirsty blind drummer, looking for sour refreshment.

Levi:
You're a drummer, too?

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
Who's there? Who's there?

Levi:
My name's Levi! This is my lemonade stand.

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
Yeah! I'd love to have some lemonade! Wow!

Levi:
Business has kind of cooled down.

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
It's cool to be blind! Because if I wasn't blind, I wouldn't of been the world's best drummer. Want to see?

Levi:
Oh, yes!

[Gary Bunda does the music by imitating the drums]

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
Yeah! Yeah, rock and roll, yeah!

Levi:
I'm a drummer, too.

Gary Bunda:
Are you, now? [sniffles] Do you want to take a look at my magical drumsticks? [pulls up scooping utensils]

Levi:
Wow, those sure are weird drumsticks, mister!

Gary Bunda (as Blind Drummer):
[voice breaking] You just keep your eyes open real wide so you can get a good look at them, okay?

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Dustin Diamond:
Can we please do something about the temperature in here?

Gary Bunda:
We actually can, you know. In order to reverse the spell and to keep Hell from freezing over...

Dustin Diamond:
Okay.

Gary Bunda:
...all you need to do is stab your son's eyes out.

Audience:
[laughter]

Dustin Diamond:
Wait, what? No. No! I'm sorry, I just don't see Squeak doing that.

Gary Bunda:
Really? This is weird, because from my recollection, you stabbed somebody in real life, Dustin!

Dustin Diamond:
Look, I had a knife, yes, but it was for defense. Some guy tried to choke me and nicked his arm. It was a big to-do. The media just loves to spin that whole "child star gone bad" angle. That's why this show is so important. It gives me a chance to rehabilitate my image.

Gary Bunda:
Wait. So, none of this is a torture for you?

Dustin Diamond:
I'm acting, Gary. Hello, I'm an actor! [laughs] Ta-da!

Gary Bunda:
Fine, I'll stab the boy's eyes out.

Audience:
Ooh.

Gary Bunda:
[to the Audience] IT'S MY JO-O-OB!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Satan:
In order to reverse the spell and get the snow to stop, I need the eyes of a small child.

Gary Bunda:
[acting] Oh, that's it? I thought you were gonna ask for something ridiculous.

Audience:
[laughter]

Gary Bunda:
[acting] Where are we gonna find a child in Hell?

Satan:
This child falsely accused a priest of rape.

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
That -- That's not even a joke. That...that actually happened.

Gary Bunda:
[acting] I don't think an eyeless child's gonna play very well with our audience. It's a bit of a downer, am I right?

[Satan grabs Gary by the ear]

Satan:
You know what's even more of a downer? Being frozen in Hell for all eternity. Now, you get out there and you go find this kid and rip his eyes out and bring them back to me! I can't take much more of this.

Gary Bunda:
Alright. Boob farts.

[Satan throws the book at Gary]

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

Eddie:
Hey, Satan! This hot poker ain't hot anymore.

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
Alright, well then, just stick it on your tongue.

Eddie:
Yeah, but it's already been up my ass.

Satan:
I know exactly where it's been, Eddie.

Audience:
Ooh.

[Satan sticks the poker into Eddie's tongue]

Audience:
[laughter]

Eddie:
Razzleberries!

[Satan aggressively pulls the poker away making Eddie's tongue skin bleeding]

Eddie:
AAAAH!

[Claude then falls into a pit of Diarrhea Lagoon]

Audience:
[laughter]

Satan:
KNOCK IT OFF!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 6 months ago

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