Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #159

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,280 quotes total — keep up the great work!

[Gary and Claude wakes up while being in wheelchairs from the gun incident]

Satan:
Morning, ladies. No, no, no, no, no. Don't try to speak. Some maniac shot you in the larynx. So what you're gonna do is, you're gonna blow into those little straws, and it will point to words on the monitor.

Gary's Monitor:
Poop.

Satan:
Poop. You've gotta go poop.

Gary's Monitor:
Poop. Poop.

Satan:
Okay, you can just go right in your diaper.

Claude's Monitor:
Dog Booty. Dog Booty.

Satan:
Listen, I know you have a lot to express in your heart.

Claude's Monitor:
Dog Booty.

Satan:
But the monitor has a very limited vocabulary.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Gary Bunda:
Rainbow Pie.

Windstorm:
It's Windstorm, but I can see how you would make that mistake!

Gary Bunda:
Well, you're a bad guy with a gun. And I'm a good guy with the gun. Windstorm: Don't shoot, Gary. I'm a good guy with gun, too!

[Gary shoots Windstorm]

Rainbow Pie:
YOU KILLED WINDSTORM, YOU SON OF A BITCH! Say hello to your little friend. I'm talking about me -- RAINBOW PIE!

[Rainbow Pie brutally murders Gary's scrotum]

Gary Bunda:
[distorted] MY DICK! MY BALLS! MY DICK AND BALLS!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Claude:
What are you doing?

Windstorm:
I'm looking for my bubble wrap that YOU STOLE!

Claude:
There are ways to solve conflict without guns.

Windstorm:
You stole my bubble wrap! I have to stand my ground.

Claude:
I understand that. It's not your fault if...if only the rules here were like they were in Australia, you know?

Windstorm:
What's, uh...Australia?

Claude:
It's a place, Windstorm -- A beautiful place. They used to have a ton of guns, but then they banned them. And the shootings stopped. let me show you.

[Claude search a video from Styxipedia about Kangaroos]

Windstorm:
[laughs] That's a funny baby horse inside a mama horse.

Claude:
No, that's a Kangaroo and its Joey.

Windstorm:
Joey? But she won't throw Joey away.

Claude:
No, Windstorm. Never. [holds Wind's cord] They keep their Joeys close, like we are right now.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[the demons watch a gun safety video made by Gary]

Gary Bunda:
[singing] A rifle in the wrong hands can cause a killing spree, but a gun in the hand of a righteous man is what made our country free. What if Kennedy had a gun? The other other guy wouldn't have too much fun. It damn sure would have been a different story of the sixth floor of the book depository if Kennedy had a gun. Light 'em up, gents!

[the demons' reactions while watching the video]

Gary Bunda:
Bap, bap, bap, bap!

Claude:
No one's offended?

[back to the gun safety video]

Gary Bunda:
[singing] Maybe we'd be in a better place if everyone in the human race could only have gun. It starts with me and Gandhi and Sharon Tate and Malcolm X, John Lennon, Abe Lincoln, 2pac, Dian Fossey, Biggie Smalls, Pancho Villa.

Claude:
I can't be a part of this.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Claude:
If we're gonna be giving guns to everybody, don't you think we should have some safety training?

All:
[grumbling]

Satan:
I need one of those laser dots.

Ben:
Hey, man, is that my pen?

Claude:
No. I'm talking about mandatory background checks, mental health exams. It -- It's just common sense gun control, guys.

Ben:
Seriously, man, it's got my teeth marks on it.

Claude:
It's not your pen, Ben. Satan, think about it, these guys are all idiots. Do you want them running around with --

[Ben points the gun at Claude]

Claude:
Um, you know what, Ben, um, yeah, why don't you just take that pen.

Ben:
Thank you.

Satan:
See that, it was Ben's pen after all.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Eddie:
I told you, less face and less groin, yet you keep going there.

Troy:
And I tell you, I'll do what I want to do.

Eddie:
Well, you see this? [points to his gun, then became serious] You're gonna do less face and less groin, and you're gonna do it now.

Troy:
[serious] I'll do as much face and as much groin as I want to. [kisses his gun]

Eddie:
Dizzay, give me my gun.

[Dizzay takes Eddie's gun]

Dizzay:
[serious] You don't tell me what to f***ing do, Eddie.

Troy:
Yeah. You tell 'em, Dizzay.

Dizzay:
[points the gun at Troy] And you don't tell me what to do, either.

Troy:
YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

Dizzay:
DON'T PUT YOUR GUN AT ME.

Troy:
DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

Eddie:
PUT THE GUN IN MY HAND AND LET ME POINT IT AT TROY.

Troy:
[to Dizzay] Would you just give him his gun? He has a right to protect himself.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Windstorm:
Well, looky here, Dr. Ashby. We meet again!

Dr. Ashby:
We don't know each other, sir.

Windstorm:
Not so big without your vacuum tube, are you?

Dr. Ashby:
Please, I'm merely an obstetrician. I'm down here for fondling my patients, that's all.

Windstorm:
And I'm a Cabbage Patch Kid. Ah, ah, ah! Hands where I can see 'em, Ashby. In nine weeks, we develop a conscience. So, you're looking at my head circumference and wondering... "Is he eight weeks, or is he nine?" [pistol cocks] Well, do you feel lucky, punk?!

[Claude escapes away from this madness]

Windstorm:
See ya, Claude.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Claude:
[to Dr. Ashby] Diarrhea's a pretty bold roast today.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Gary Bunda:
I will shoot you in the -- In the -- In the dick, Rainbow Pie.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Gary Bunda:
One gun for Gary Bunda. Make it loaded.

Claude:
You, of all people, you haven't learned one lesson about guns?

Gary Bunda:
GIVE ME A GODDAMN GUN! 'Cause if I had a gun that day when Rainbow Pie shot me, I would have shot that gun out of his hands, and I wouldn't be here right now like this.

[Satan gives Gary a gun to get his revenge on Rainbow Pie]

Claude:
This is so wrong.

Satan:
No one's forcing you. if you don't want a gun, you don't have to have one.

Claude:
I don't need a gun. I'm saying what is to prevent some lunatic just from coming--

[suddenly someone trying to shoot them]

Claude:
WHOA!

Satan:
SHANE, KNOCK IT OFF!

[Shane gunfires everyone with a happily crazy expression]

Satan:
Alright, everybody grab a gun, protect yourselves. Hurry up.

[Every demon, tortured soul, Nazi, Arab, even Satan, etc got in on the fun of battling Shane's gunfiring shenanigans]

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[the Mutant Babies come by to get guns]

Claude:
No, no, no. Not these dicks.

Satan:
Oh, definitely these dicks.

Claude:
No.

Windstorm:
Do you have the guns to make the bullets go fast, like -- Like pap, pap, pap, pap?!

Satan:
Of course I do! It's and AR-15 with a bump stock. Knock yourself out.

Claude:
How are they even gonna shoot that thing? Their fingers are stuck together. They can't even pull the trigger.

Windstorm:
My brain has hemispheres. Who are you to tell me I don't get to have a gun?!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Satan starts a gun shop]

Satan:
Single file. One gun apiece. Remember, the only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun -- That's it.

Claude:
So, everybody just gets a gun, even the presidential assassins?

Satan:
Yes.

Claude:
Even the school shooters?

Satan:
Yes, absolutely?

Claude:
The undiagnosed schizophrenics? The terrorists?

Satan:
Definitely. All those guys.

Claude:
Idi Amin and the Nazis?

Satan:
Yes, of course.

Claude:
And Harpo or Zeppo or whoever the f*** this is?

Satan:
Yeah.

Claude:
The skinheads? THIS guy gets a gun.

Satan:
This guy.

Claude:
THIS MAN!

Satan:
He's a wizard.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Satan:
Hey, Gary, buddy. How you doing? I hustled down as soon as I heard.

Gary Bunda:
[groans] It's been three months.

Satan:
You have my thoughts and prayers. Heard you got shot in the dick.

Gary Bunda:
I got shot in the hip.

Satan:
I understand. It's embarrassing to say you got shot in the dick, so you're -- You're saying "Hip." It's okay, but you might want to change the dressing on your "Hip," because it's bleeding into your dick.

Gary Bunda:
I've been degraded enough.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Claude:
We're making bracelets for you.

Gary Bunda:
You are?

Claude:
No, I hate you, you f***ing piece of sh*t.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Claude:
So, apparently, that blob of hamburger meat got this gun at a gun show down here. Since when do we have gun shows?

Satan:
They don't like to be hamburger meat, Claude.

Claude:
They're accidents. Why don't you just hit the undo button on them?

Satan:
They have souls, too, Claude. They have nowhere to go. They were never born, so they were never baptized. Nobody wants 'em.

Claude:
Yeah, I don't want them, especially next to my cube. I mean, the world is better of with out them. There's actually a really interesting passage in "Freakonomics" that you should --

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Claude gets pissed with all the bubble wrap popping the mutant babies are doing]

Claude:
GARY! Some of us are trying to work, and the sound is insane! So, pleases, take it away from them.

Gary Bunda:
You want me to take away the only pleasure they've ever had in their never-lived lives?

Claude:
Yeah --

Gary Bunda:
[to the Mutant Babies] No, I will not do it.

Claude:
Then I will, 'cause I have authority over anything over negative six months old, okay?! Fully formed people are trying to work.

Windstorm:
TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF OUR BUBBLE WRAP!

[Windstorm bits Claude's nipple]

Gary Bunda:
It's fine.

[Windstorm holds a gun at one of them]

Gary Bunda:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Just put the gun down. I don't know how you got it. Okay, I understand that he's a doodie-head-- [referring to Claude]

[Windstorm shoots someone]

Claude:
AAH! [touches his body that he's fine]

Gary Bunda:
[grunts] I got shot!

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Gary Bunda:
Troy, did you unplug my monitor? [checks his monitor] I'm sorry. I did it -- With my foot. I'm sorry.

Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
The hell was that?

Liquor:
Uh, that. That was Amalockh.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Ama what?

Liquor:
Amalockh.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
What's he do?

Liquor:
He k-- He kills us.

[Clock showed up]

Liquor:
He kills us all.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Well-- [pulls up gun] Then we'll kill him back.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Liquor:
What is that there behind that thing there?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Some kind of lock.

Liquor:
A what?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
It's a lock.

Liquor:
Is it?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
A lock.

Liquor:
Is it?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
A lock.

Liquor:
Is it?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Lock.

Liquor:
It?

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Liquor:
Why are you climbing the clothes closet?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Now I'm a clothes climber.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Roostre:
[to Fitz] You told me it was coming, bro. You told me to build the robots, and you told me how to do it.

Roostre:
Synthetic carbopolymers got them through man. They got them through, Mouse. They got through, and we're gonna get out.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
I know 1Q. That's line code for Xenomorphentation.

Roostre:
You're getting it. Very smart.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Arachnid Xenomorphentation.

Roostre:
And that's where the dog went.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
He was headed to the report chart but right before--

Roostre:
Before what, man?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Before I... [pulls out beer] Watch.

[Fitz drinks, then passes out]

Roostre:
[looks at the audience] And who added to the report chart?

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

Roostre:
Yeah, man. You're right. You're right. It is crazy, man. I got this one hand and all that, and I grow these corn dogs and all that, but listen. You know that Q109 stuff? That stuff's real.

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
But Q109 isn't a station.

Roostre:
Oh, you don't say, huh? Then what -- What do you think it is?

Mouse 'Fitz' Fitzgerald:
Look. Beer.

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

[Liquor hits Fitz with a night stick to get Fitz back up from his dreams]

Liquor:
I said, "What are we gonna do? They're coming.

Skillet:
[angrily squeals]

Liquor:
You, chill out. I'm not gonna hurt him.

Skillet:
[squeals]

Liquor:
I'm saving him. [beats Fitz with the night stick again]

12 oz. Mouse  Movie Quote

added 7 months ago

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