Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #36

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,337 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Mother Teresa:
Alright, cobbed-web all cleaned up.

Polidori:
Ooh, shiny.

Mother Teresa:
So, now maybe I have a little abort--

Victor Frankenstein:
Yeah, thanks. Um, now if you could, my wife, Elizabeth needs a little help in the bathroom.

Mother Teresa:
But the pool, I must go to them.

Victor Frankenstein:
Pleeeease?

Mother Teresa:
[stressed] Ooh, the puppy dog eyesey, I can't--

Victor Frankenstein:
Pleeeeeease? [shoves Polidori to get on with it]

Polidori:
Yes. Pleeeease, help his...wife?

Mother Teresa:
Oh, alright, alright! I'll go help Ms. Lady, but then with you hoo-hoo -- [points to her stomach]

Victor Frankenstein:
Yes, yes, yes, thank you, Mother Teresa, thank you.

Mother Teresa:
Okay, I hold you to this one. [leaves angrily]

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

The Invisible Man:
Hello, little peasant girl.

Marina:
Who's there?

The Invisible Man:
Me. Chad Griffin. The Invisible Man!

Marina:
Are you a monster?

The Invisible Man:
Oh, ho, ho ho, heavens no. I'm a brilliant mad scientist who has created a serum for invisibility. Unfortunately, I've yet to create a serum for...visibility.

Marina:
You don't need a serum for that.

The Invisible Man:
Not most people, no. But I do.

Marina's Cat:
Meeeow.

The Invisible Man:
And yet I still enjoy life, and though I'm invisible it's better than most have it around here. I mean, I'm invisible, yes, but at least I'm not an ugly monster.

Marina:
Were you ugly when you weren't invisible?

The Invisible Man:
Eeeeh...I...nooo. I did alright, uh, dated a little. Went steady with a cute-enough bird, you know. She was fine. I, uh [laughs] I think she broke up with me because I was obsessed with work.

Marina:
Really?

Marina's Cat:
Meow?

The Invisible Man:
I said I THINK.

Marina's Cat:
Meow.

Marina:
Sorry.

Marina:
So...how do you make your clothes invisible?

Marina:
Meow? [same question that Marina said]

The Invisible Man:
How's that?

Marina:
Well, a serum not a potion. When you drink it, it goes into your body. Not your clothes.

Marina's Cat:
Meow. [agrees]

The Invisible Man:
Yeah, that's true. I, uh, suppose.

Marina:
Soooo?

Marina's Cat:
Meoooow?

The Invisible Man:
Well, my clothes *aren't* invisible, per se.

Marina's Cat:
Meow?

The Invisible Man:
I...take them off.

Marina:
Wai-- You're telling me that you're talking to a poor little peasant girl while you're...naked.

Marina's Cat:
Meow? [same question that Marina said]

The Invisible Man:
Yes.

Marina and Marina' Cat:
[screams]

The Invisible Man:
ALRIGHT, I'M LEAVING! DON'T SCREAM! [gets hit by more eyecrows and bugs] OW! OUCH! OH, BUGS IN MY TEETH! [spits] ACK!

Marina:
Scientists! They're worst even than monsters!

Marina's Cat:
Meow. [agrees]

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Griffin gets hit by an eyecrow]

The Invisible Man:
Ow! Damn it! Kick you in water.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Polidori:
Frankenstein, Mother Teresa.

Victor Frankenstein:
Pleasure, to meet you, Mother. What can we *do* to you.

Mother Teresa:
[crying] I, uh -- I, you're not gonna believe this, I --

Victor Frankenstein:
Spit it out.

Mother Teresa:
I'm pregant...

Victor & Polidori:
...

Mother Teresa:
WITH A CHILD! [cries]

Victor Frankenstein:
Really?

Polidori:
Well, conbadulations.

Victor Frankenstein:
Well, who did this to you?

Mother Teresa:
Who knows, it could be anyone! I can't remember, I do A LOT of people, A LOT of favors! Haunting faces, everywhere! [shivers] Ooh, all this catholic guilt is killing me!

Mother Teresa:
My problem, I can't say no. People give me those puppy doggy eyes, I go melting.

Victor Frankenstein:
So, what do you need from us?

Mother Teresa:
I can't have baby. It's bad for my job. KIRIENT KAPUT! So, you know I need the...baby go bye-bye.

Victor Frankenstein:
But any doctor could do this mind-nummingly routine procedure, why come to us?

Mother Teresa:
Because you're very far away. Not to mean walking but also by tick-tocks. No one must know.

Victor Frankenstein:
I see.

Polidori:
Ah.

Victor Frankenstein:
Ah, yes. Well, I think we can help you but, um...this laboratory is so filthy, we couldn't possibly work in these tragic conditions. Do you think, could you possibly, pleeease clean it for us, Mother Teresa.

Polidori:
Yes. Pleeeeeeease! We're simply starving for cleanliness.

Victor Frankenstein:
Pleeease!

Polidori:
Pleeeeease!

Victor & Polidori:
Pleeeeeeease!

Mother Teresa:
Alright, yes, I have a little time, I supposy.

Victor Frankenstein:
Thank you.

Polidori:
Perfect.

Mother Teresa:
BUT I CAN'T STAY FOR --

Victor Frankenstein:
THANK YOU!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Polidori:
Mother Teresa?

Mother Teresa:
Yes, please.

Polidori:
Well, as long as you're begging, do come in.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[while Elizabeth takes her bath]

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
I know you're there, Griffin.

The Invisible Man:
...

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
I mean, if you weren't at this point, I'd be insulted.

The Invisible Man:
...

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Towel, please!

[The Invisible Man gives Elizabeth the towel, until he plays around with it for a few seconds]

The Invisible Man:
How you'd knew I was here?

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Because you're a pervert. That's how. You're always here when I bathe.

The Invisible Man:
So, I suppose I should be taking a nice legally stroll outside instead.

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Thank god, forbid.

The Invisible Man:
Ha! You know nothing about being invisible! It's a bloodbath out there. [worries] Birds and bugs!

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
It'll be a bloodbath in here if Victor catches you. You know how unbelievably jealous he gets.

The Invisible Man:
Ha! Just let him catch me! [laughs] I'm The Invisible Man! HAHAHAHA!

[Victor shows up]

Victor Frankenstein:
How dare you!

The Invisible Man:
I didn't touch her!

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Dear, please, I'm naked.

The Invisible Man:
[grabs a robe] So am I!

Victor Frankenstein:
Me, jealous? Ha. That's a real laugh, Elizabeth. A real laugh. I mean, A. I am a handsome, young, immortal genius who is threaten by absolutely no one. And B, jealousy is a waste of brain activity. I have many more important things to do than be *unbelievably jealous*.

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
[doesn't care] Okay, you caught me.

Victor Frankenstein:
Hello, Griffin. Hope you're well.

The Invisible Man:
Uhm...I'm okay, I guess.

Victor Frankenstein:
Good, good. Off to work. Take care, old boy. [while touch Griffin's ballsack]

The Invisible Man:
EY!

Victor Frankenstein:
HA HA! [leaves]

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
[to Griffin] What? Don't look at me like that.

The Invisible Man:
Like, what?

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Men. [leaves]

The Invisible Man:
[looks at mirror] Seriously, like what?

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[after Elke Sommer got bitten by the werewolf version of Stewart, she turns into another Stewart]

Stewart:
Oh, no. No! It can't be!

Elke Sommer:
[Stewart's voice] Look at me! Don't you see? Don't you get it? Why, it must be because I got aroused -- Just like when your mustache grows in. I'm a Were-Lawrence! A Were-Lawrence! Help me, Stewart! You got to help me, can't you?! Hold me! Please, you got to hold me!

Stewart:
Uh...

Elke Sommer:
Aww, you fool! Don't hand me "Uh"! I'm cursed! Now, hold me, will you? Yes, Stewart. That's better. You do love me. Kiss me! You got to, can't ya? [smooches]

Stewart:
Ew! Ugh! Quit all this! I can't make love to myself -- Not when there's two of me!

Elke Sommer:
Aw, stop all that guff! I'm still your Elke. It's me. Can't you see? Stewart, you love me. [cranky singing] Let's blame the moon, it's just a stupid planet --

Stewart:
Aw, stop it! Stop it, you ugly, pathetic fool!

Elke Sommer:
Oh, Stewart.

[Elke Sommer turns back to her normal self]

Stewart:
[grows his mustache] Say, now that's more like it, baby!

[as Stewart was about to kiss Elke Sommer, she then turns into Stewart again]

Stewart:
Oh, forget it!

Elke Sommer:
Say you still love me, Stewart. Tell me you can see through my curse. See the real me, my love! Yes, I am a Were-Lawrence, but most of the time, I'll be Elke Sommer, the most beautiful woman in this entire world!

Stewart:
[grows his mustache]

Elke Sommer:
I'll only be you when I'm sexually aroused.

Stewart:
[ungrows his mustache]

Stewart:
Oh, I do love you, Elke. I really do. You're sweet and understanding and calm and funny and lovable and sexy.

Stewart:
Just not when you're me. But you still love me, so at least you can kill me. Here -- Take this gun. It's got silver bullets. Kill me!

Elke Sommer:
I can't, Stewart!

Stewart:
You must! Kill me!

Elke Sommer:
Stewart!

Stewart:
Ah, do it, you idiot!

[as Elke shoots Stewart with a silver bullet, nothing happened]

Stewart:
You don't love me?

Elke Sommer:
You rejected me! Oh, I don't know how I feel!

Elke Sommer:
I think we should consider couples counseling.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[after Elke sings Stewart a song to tame the werewolf version of Stewart until morning]

Stewart:
Gee. You did that for me? You could have been killed.

Elke Sommer:
I trust you, Stewart. I love you.

Stewart:
Oh, Elke! I love you, see? Oh, boy! Will you marry me?

Elke Sommer:
Yes, Stewart! Yes! Make love to me.

[Stewart release his mustache again as always]

Elke Sommer:
Why does that happen?

Stewart:
Well, when I get sexually aroused, it just sprouts up. Side effect, I guess.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Victor Frankenstein:
Welcome to my humble castle, Miss Sommer. How may I be of help?

Elke Sommer:
Well, it's going to seem silly, but I came here through your time -- Your time --

Victor Frankenstein:
Frankenhole.

Elke Sommer:
Yes. 1966. You see, there, I am considered one of the most desirable women in the world. Men only want to use me for my beauty, and it's made me rather untrusting of love. So I want you to make into a monster -- Something ugly so that I know when a man says he loves me, he truly means it.

Elke Sommer:
That's silly, I suppose.

Polidori:
No. Psychotic, perhaps.

Stewart:
Ah, don't listen to that mug. You're right! Men are manipulative jerks!

Elke Sommer:
Do you really think so? Mr. Lawrence?

[Stewart release his mustache again]

Stewart:
Call me Stewart.

Elke Sommer:
Oh, that's a neat trick.

Stewart:
Come on, baby. Let's get out of here. I'll show you the town, give you the jazz!

Elke Sommer:
Alright, Mr. Law-- Oh, Stewart. You are charming as you are handsome.

[as Stewart and Elke Sommer were about to leave]

Stewart:
[to Victor] I'll be dead within a week!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Polidori:
Gentlemen, the Bride of the Wolfman.

Victor Frankenstein:
Oh, let it go.

Polidori:
[pout]

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Stewart gets ready for his date]

Polidori:
Here we come.

Stewart:
How do I look? Hmm?

Victor Frankenstein:
Like you've been impaled on a fence for 70 years.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[after Stewart saw a lovely patient]

Stewart:
I'll get her to love me and then kill me.

Victor Frankenstein:
The second part will be a great deal easier than the first. For myself, I can't get enough of part two!

[Victor shoots an arrow to Stewart's head just for fun]

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Stewart:
Frankenstein, it didn't work.

Victor Frankenstein:
Of course not.

Stewart:
But whyyy?

Victor Frankenstein:
Because I hate you. And the curse said that you can only be "cured" of being alive if you are killed by a silver bullet fired by someone who loves you.

Polidori:
And who would ever love you, you pathetic, fatuous, whiny little --

[a customer arrives]

Elke Sommer:
Frankenstein? My name is Elke Sommer, and I need your help.

[Stewart suddenly grows a mustache]

Stewart:
[suavely] Well, hello.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[after Victor and Polidori got finish creating a bat shark, and then blowing it into pieces]

Victor Frankenstein:
[laughs] Bored again.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Heinrich:
Good evening, Mr. Genmleman.

Stewart:
I got to see -- Huh?

Heinrich:
...

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Baron brings Stewart to Victor Frankenstein's lair for help]

Victor Frankenstein:
[to his son] Well, hello, there, young sir. And who have you brought with -- [sees Stewart] [tired] Oh, no.

Stewart:
Please, Dr. Frankenstein, I beg you -- You got to end my torture!

Victor Frankenstein:
Look --

Stewart:
Cure me or...or...

Victor Frankenstein:
Look --

Stewart:
...kill me.

Victor Frankenstein:
Yes. Look, Mr. Lawrence, I've told you before -- There's no curing you. There's no killing you. You are immortal, just like myself and Professor Polidori, here.

Stewart:
I just want to die!

Polidori:
My god. At least kill him for my sake.

Stewart:
[to Polidori] Stay out of this, old lady! Even a man who says his prayers. I say my prayers. I pray to die every night. Don't you see? I'm cursed to kill. Death would be a blessing. But not just any death. I need a silver bullet.

Victor Frankenstein:
Here's one. [shoots Stewart with a silver bullet]

Polidori:
Well, he can't say it, so I will. Thank you.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Victor Frankenstein:
It's ridiculous.

Polidori:
Just hear me out!

Victor Frankenstein:
It's pointless, without merit. May we move on?

Polidori:
I could sew her a stunning bridal gown in taffeta and lace.

Victor Frankenstein:
[sighs] You just want to play dress-up.

Polidori:
And her hair! Ooh! I have ideas!

Victor Frankenstein:
Been there! Made that! On to the next!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Baron Frankenstein:
[babbling] Daddy's gonna help this fine genmleman. [babbling] Real fun!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Baron Frankenstein:
Well, hello, there! Are you coming to see my daddy?

Stewart:
Baron Frankenstein? Yeah, yeah! I need his help.

Baron Frankenstein:
Well, yes, indeed! That's what my daddy does, is help genmlemen like yourself. Are you a gemleman?

Stewart:
No. I'm a monster. A monster! You'd better run as far as --

Baron Frankenstein:
Alright, genmleman. Ou can come inna my house.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Stewart tries to get some help to end his werewolf curse]

Stewart:
[sees Victor's castle] Frankenstein. Victor Frankenstein. You'll understand. I'll make you understand.

[cuts to the next where Stewart bangs Victor's door for help]

Stewart:
LET ME IIIIIN! I'M A MONSTER! I NEED SOME HELP, YOU STUPID GENIUS!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
Consarnit. You tellin' me that I finally git me a kissable patootie and on the most romantic night of the month, I'm gonna grow hair all over it?! Hell, I might as well have a dumbass square head like doofus over here! [referring to Creation's square head]

Victor Frankenstein:
[sighs] That's not real. [to his Creation] TAKE THAT STUPID THING OFF!

Frankenstein's Creation:
[to LBJ] But it is more to your liking?

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
Oh, yeah, I love it! Bend over!

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
I hat to break it to ya, boys. But you just lost yourself one happy customer. And I will not be recommendin' you highly to any time period any time soon!

Victor & Polidori:
[doesn't care]

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
[to his mirror] Come on, handsome. Let's get out of here. [leaves]

Frankenstein's Creation:
[to Victor] Do I not look more fetching?

Victor Frankenstein:
Oh, GO TO YOUR ROOM!

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[LBJ gets attacked by a werewolf]

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
Get your hand off me! I'm the President of the goldarn United States! Get away from me, you weirdo monkey man! Ow! I said ow!

[when a gunshot was heard, the werewolf whimpers off, leaving LBJ in JFK's body injured]

Gustav:
He's alive! Now he gets to be a werewolf.

Heinrich:
Ah, lucky.

Gustav:
How come we're the only ones who don't live forever around here?

Heinrich:
Yeah. Tell me about it.

Elizabeth Frankenstein:
Boys! Come into the castle and clean your rooms!

Heinrich & Gustav:
Coming, Mother.

Gustav:
Dumb immortal.

Heinrich:
Shh! Gustav, she'll hear you, and we'll be grounded again.

Gustav:
I don't care!

Heinrich:
Well, I do! I do like to get out and about from time to time.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
[boston accent] Ask not what I can do for you... [LBJ's voice] ask what you can do to my Marilyn Monroe-Rammer.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Polidori:
[to LBJ] Would you like me to get you two a room so you can be alone with yourselves?

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
No, but you can quit yer leering at my sweet woman-lovin' ass and go get me somethin' to dingle my new dangle into so I can make sure my pumper's ticking sufficiently.

Polidori:
Here, you can use this leftover brain.

Lyndon Brines Johnson:
Heh. I'll customize it for your dumbass.

Mary Shelley's Frankenhole  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

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