Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #41

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 5,716 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Drinky Crow:
It's like my brain keeps telling me to drink but I know I shouldn't.

Uncle Gabby:
Listen to your brain. It knows you pretty well.

[Drinky's Brain grabs Drinky Crow]

Drinky's Brain:
Listen to the SMART MONKEY!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Drinky's Brain:
We need more booze, fellas. And fast!

Drinky's Liver:
No we don't! I'm dyin' here!

Drinky's Brain:
[pulls the gun on Drinky's Liver] Just do your job, you pansy!

[when Drinky's brain shoots the liver, the bullet transported out of Drinky's body into UG's body also shooting Uncle Gabby's bladder]

Syphilis:
Serves you right! I'm gonna unwrap this monkey's nervous system like a present on christmas morning!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Drinky Crow:
I thought quitting drinking would make me feel better, Uncle Gabby. I feel awful.

Uncle Gabby:
Yeah I know what you mean, Crow. Ever since I got lucky with that conjoined triplet, I've felt kinda weird. Like there's a battle going on inside me.

[zooms in into UG's stomach seeing his talking organs]

Syphilis:
Outta my way, Bladder! I'm a young syphilis with a lot to prove!

Bladder:
You'll have to get past me!

[UG sees Bladder and Syphilis fighting each other]

Uncle Gabby:
[to Drinky Crow] Does that look bad to you?

Drinky Crow:
Heh. I'll have to be honest with you. It looks okay.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Phoebe:
Do you promise me this acupuncture treatment will fix him? For good?

Asian Market Guy:
Crow get needle, Crow no want drink.

[Phoebe grabs the needles and stabs them into Drinky's head]

Drinky's Brain:
HEY! WHO DRAINED THE BOOZE POOL?!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Drinky Crow and Uncle Gabby runs away from the conjoined triplets]

Brian:
Hey come back! What's the matter? You don't like me? [to Drinky Crow] Ask him if he likes me.

Drinky Crow:
[to UG] Do you like him?

Uncle Gabby:
NO!

Drinky Crow:
[Brian] He says no.

Brian:
Ask him why not.

Drinky Crow:
Why don't you like him?

Uncle Gabby:
I JUST DON'T!

Brian:
[to Drinky Crow] Tell him I'll start off forcing him and then he'll learn to like it.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[while Uncle Gabby have sex with Sharon]

Man:
These are good crackers. Yup, really good crackers.

[Uncle Gabby goes back to having sex with Sharon]

Man:
You don't get crackers like this everyday, no sirree!

Uncle Gabby:
Could you keep it down?

Man:
No can do. These crackers are just too good. Mmm. Good crackers!

Uncle Gabby:
Well go enjoy them someplace else. YOU'RE RUINING THE MOOD!

Sharon's Husband:
[appears from the sheets] Not possible. Sharon and I are conjoined.

Uncle Gabby:
[groans]

[while UG finally gets back to having sex with Sharon, UG touches Sharon's husband nipple without realizing]

Uncle Gabby:
I gotta say, this feels a little queer.

Sharon's Husband:
I never thought about it like that before. I guess, uh, when you think about the fact that I can feel everything that happens in Sharon's body, and I'm a man, it sort of is. I mean I see your point.

Uncle Gabby:
Alright that's bogus. For two dollars, I expect a normal girl, not a conjoined twin.

Sharon:
[crying]

Sharon's Husband:
Nice. [to UG] You know, we aren't conjoined twins.

Uncle Gabby:
Yeah. How so?

Sharon's Husband:
We're conjoined triplets.

[Sharon's Husband opens the sheet some more revealing a big monster that's been conjoined with Sharon and himself]

Brian:
Keep goin' buddy! I'm almost there.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[after Drinky got saved from his friends when he made a speech about his new brain for the bored teenagers]

Asian Market Guy:
Shoulda used Timer Killer brain. Grandma always say killing much more entertaining than healing.

Drinky Crow:
I wonder if those teenagers will ever experience something interesting enough that it will hold their attention.

[cuts to the next scene where there's time bomb that explodes the water theme park making the audience drown in water and getting eaten by vicious sea monsters]

Uncle Gabby:
Hard to say, Drinky Crow. Hard to say.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Drinky Crow:
Bored teenagers! I have a shocking revelation about my personal tragedy! This brain belonged to my murderous whale's and it says Cindy wasn't killed at sea!

[flashblack intensifies]

Drinky Crow:
She faked her death! Cindy collected the insurance money and split it with her real boyfriend, the corrupt insurance agent. I know this because I also have their brains!

Teenager #2:
How'd you get them?

Drinky Crow:
That's not important.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
This brain from serial killer called Timer Killer. He use timer bombs to kill everyone he angry at. Even himself.

Drinky Crow:
I heard of him. They say there's still timers out there they never found, right? Hello! Who's that?

Asian Market Guy:
That from big smelly whale I found on beach. It my lunch.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
And this from drunk bum who became drunk cartoonist!

[shows the next scene where two actors sees their miniature selves on the same platform showing another miniature selves on the platform and so on]

Audience:
Boo! This sucks!

[Ocean Fun World Lady hits Uncle Gabby with a bat]

Ocean Fun World Lady:
You're writing is bad and so are you! You're fired!

Uncle Gabby:
But I was gonna have the walls of my vagina mansion rejuvenated!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
Oppressed mouse.

[cuts to the next scene where two actors are in object costumes]

Popcorn:
Hey do you have my four dollars?

Floss:
What four dollars?

Sea Monster:
Y'all want to suck my balls?

[Popcorn and Floss explodes]

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
Surf Nazi centipede.

[cuts to the next scene where two actors fires guns out of the air while wearing bug costumes]

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
Ten-mile wide fungus.

[cuts to the next scene where two mushrooms have sex with each other]

Mushroom #1:
Gonna sporulate!

Mushroom #2:
Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! NOW!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Asian Market Guy:
This brain of choreographer killed by Spike!

[cuts to the next scene where dancing ladies got hit in the big nail on their foreheads]

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Uncle Gabby:
Ocean World, put your fins together for Super Tough Sex Girl Who Also Is Tom Boyfriend Of Obese Virigin!

Super Tough Sex Girl:
I'm so scary and sexy! If only I could meet a guy who shares my love of comic books. Although my body is perfect, his need not be!

Super Tough Sex Girl:
My arch villain, the Quarterback!

Quarterback:
Date me! Or I'll kill you!

Super Tough Sex Girl:
No way! I find your out-going social personality a real turn-off!

Quarterback:
Oh yeah? Take this!

[Quarterback throw many footballs but she dodges them]

Super Tough Sex Girl:
Looks like this game has reached sudden death.

[STSG squished Quarterback with her breasts]

Teenager:
Whoa, that show totally nailed female psychology!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

[Drinky Crow and Uncle Gabby head to Chop Chop Grocery to get a new brain for Drinky Crow]

Asian Market Guy:
Here. Belong to man live in mother's basement. Shamed by father for having female-like breasts. Unable to hold down job because of very sweaty hands. Die of masturbation overdose.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Drinky Crow:
I like being rich. [shoots himself]

Uncle Gabby:
I bought a mansion today that was shaped just like a lady's dirty part!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Lieutenant Vronchy:
Bills getting you down?

Sailor #2:
Uh-huh!

Lieutenant Vronchy:
How about a way to kill strangers all day every day and pay for college?

[Lieutenant Vronchy shoots Sailor #2 with his cannon splats Sailor's blood on the sheets that says "Join The Navy"]

Lieutenant Vronchy:
"Join the Navy"!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Ocean Fun World Lady:
You know, your show would be perfect for our late night theme park, due to its whale theme and its appeal to our audience of bored teenagers. They have such short attention spans they respond only to violence, sex and self-referential meta-humor.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Ocean Fun World Lady:
Excuse me. I'm from Ocean Fun World. That's quite a show you've got there!

Uncle Gabby:
The secret is the blood comes from King Charles Spaniels.

[shows the next scene where the blood originally comes from dogs]

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Uncle Gabby:
Crow, you're gonna occupy people's minds with your awful story and we're gonna get rich.

Drinky Crow:
I don't know. Reliving it is really painful.

Uncle Gabby:
You got the emotional pain, Crow. You might as well make some money off of it. I promise it'll be respectful.

[cuts to the next scene where Uncle Gabby opens up a show performance]

Uncle Gabby:
Hey everybody! Come pay money to see me re-enact the death of Drinky Crow's stupid girlfriend in the mouth of a filthy whale fish! I promise you'll cry and puke your eyes and guts out, respectively!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Uncle Gabby:
Wow! We drank free the whole night! And I didn't have to chop wood or break anybody's knees or nothing!

Captain's Daughter:
[to Drinky Crow] You had a good story. People like having their minds occupied.

Uncle Gabby:
So simply by telling a story, you can get people to give you things? That's the greatest scam ever!

Captain's Daughter:
It's called "Entertainment".

Uncle Gabby:
Well anybody who'd pay to look at something that's not real is a chump and I want his money.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Captain's Daughter:
So Drinky, what part was the awfulest? When you saw the face you loved scraped off by the whale's raspy tongue?

Drinky Crow:
I'm a little raw now. I can't say.

Uncle Gabby:
I bet it was when he saw his engagement ring in the titanic whale stool. By the way, Crow, you two were engaged.

Captain Maak:
Point of curiosity here, Crow, and don't answer if it's too painful. Do you think she died instantly or did her head and bosoms survive long enough to be burned by the whale's gastric juices?

Drinky Crow:
I can't handle this! I gotta go!

Sailor:
Aw, c'mon! I wanna hear more about your horrific, scarring ordeal! It distracts me a teeny bit from my own nose cancer.

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

Drinky Crow:
Hey, why'd you guys ditch us last night?

Drinky's Brain:
YOU TRIED TO SHOOT ME, EINSTEIN! I'M NOT STUPID, I'M A BRAIN!

The Drinky Crow Show  Movie Quote

added 2 months ago

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