Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #115

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104 — There are currently 6,261 quotes total — keep up the great work!

Dean: Get your asses in here. It's time to LEARN! – China, Il Movie Quote	added 4 months ago
Gwen: I got Steve Smith for my history class. Kim: Ah, he's a great teacher and hot, too like a dad, but with, like, a dash of uncle in the mix. Wendeloquence: Well, I got his brother Frank. Is he any good? Kim: No, Frank's a terrible teacher. No dad, pure uncle. – China, Il Movie Quote	added 4 months ago
Flip Flop: Yo, I heard The Dean's a big old murderer. Random UCI Student: I heard the teachers are criminals. Flip Flop: I heard God is, like, really mad at this place. – China, Il Movie Quote	added 4 months ago
Pemsy: I mean, sure, it's the worst college in America, but, uh, I got a full scholarship, so... – China, Il Movie Quote	added 4 months ago
Dean: SUMMER IS DEAD! – China, Il Movie Quote	added 4 months ago
Mortimer: Stop. Stop cooking. I figured it all out. The It-Alien inhabited your bodies to cook its grandmother's old recipe for human disaster. Bert: What? Mortimer: [scoffs] Don't you see? The RV is a breeding ground for the master race of Noodlezoids. Tammy: Ugh. Bert: Oh, come on. Mick: Noodlezoid my ass. Tammy: If you want attention, just say so. Just say, "Hey, I need a hug", okay? – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
[Bert, Tammy, Mortimer, and Mick start to grow beards after the spaghetti assimilation] Tammy: My insides feel like they've been cored out by Satan. Mick: See, me, I feel like I feel every morning, hungover as sht ready for a fight, and gagging for a pint. Tammy:* How come we all have beards? Mick: Look at that. I can make a wee braid. Tammy: And why is it so luscious? – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Mick: [hypnotized] The Beacon. Tammy: [hypnotized] Let the gastranomicon begin. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Mortimer: Guys, I figured it out. He's an Italian Alien. An it-alien, if you will. he has come here to cook dinner for the pope in 1912, and he needs to know if we can send him back in time. So I ask you, can we send him back in time? [Tammy starts to exhale another noodleball onto Mortimer] – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Mortimer: [gets out of the bathroom] Hey, guys. You're still alive. Is it gone? Bert, Tammy, Mick: [hypnotized] Join us. Mick: [hypnotized] By the way. Mortimer: Oh, I forgot to flush. See you. [gets back to the bathroom] – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Bert: [hypnotized] Oh, look. Those are some pretty tomatoes. Must DICE them! – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Tammy: [singing] Grate, grate, grate the cheese, grate it all night long -- Bert: What the hell? My beauty sleep. Someone is taking it. [Bert sees Tammy grating the cheese] Bert: Honey, what are you doing? Tammy: [hypnotized] I'm grating this cheese. Romano and parm...zee-an...cheese. Bert: Yeah. I see that. it's 5:00 in the morning. Tammy: [hypnotized] Yes. it is. When else does one grate cheese? Mick: [hypnotized] Punch. Punch. Pass me that dough. This one's ready. Bert: You've never cooked a day in your life. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
[Mick suddenly starts to feel sick] Bert: What's up with him? Tammy: Oh, my god. Roll him over. Hold him down. Bert: No. Tammy: Put-Put your arm in his mouth. Bert: No. No, thank you. Tammy: Put your foot in his eyeball. That's what you're supposed to do. Push on his brain. Push on his brain! [Mick swallows out a plate of spaghetti] Bert: Whoa! Tammy: Wow. Bert: Viva Italia! Tammy: Who ordered Olive Garden? Mortimer: Hey, guys I'm do-- What the hell? Bert: I know. Mann from heaven. Mortimer: More like guts from hell. Tammy: Wait, baby. Do it for us. Try a flavor. Bert: I'm just high enough to try. Mortimer: No. Bert, do not eat that. [suddenly the spaghetti starts to come to life as a monster] Bert: I have the ability to piss off food. Mortimer: Uh, speaking of piss, gee, ah, I have got to pee. See you guys. Bert: Coward. Tammy: Well, that was pointless. No food. I'm starving. Bert: Let's just sleep it off. We'll eat in our dreams. Where you can order whatever you want. Tammy: But what about him? [to Mick] Bert: Ah, pfft, I've seen worse. If he's not dead, he'll be fine. [Mick literally coughs out many spaghetti items from every area of his face] – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Tammy: Now what are we supposed to eat? Bert: Ooh, what about my band-aid collection? Everyone has a different story. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Tammy: Where the hell have you been? Mick: I was jumping up and down on a dead cow by the train tracks, and then, I don't know, I think I blacked out. Tammy: You were supposed to be foraging for food, Mick. Mick: I thought you said I'm supposed to get laid. 'Cause that's something I did. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Bert: Hey, chief, how those food stamps coming? Mortimer: I think they look pretty convincing. Tammy: Oh, thank god. I'm so hungry. Mortimer: You know, this would have gone a lot easier if you didn't mainline all out printer cartridges. Bert: Yeah, I was tattooing the inside of my veins. Check it out. Fresh ink. Tammy: Ooh, you look dangerous. Like on TV. TV dangerous. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Tammy: Do it, baby. Blow them to hell. Bert: Hey, this is a lot like "The Love Boat", huh? Except everyone dies. Mortimer: Bert, save the drama. Just shoot. Bert: Sayonara. [Bert blows up the sex cruise] Bert: YEAH! WOO-HOO-HOO! YEAH [sees Mick falling from the explosion] Whoa. Mick: Legendary spam gasm. Did you see what my crotch did? Tammy: At least we're all safe. [all the four gets eaten by a big fish] – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Robot Ex-Wife #2: The evening orgasm variety show will begin in five minutes. Prepare all captives for complete genital exhaustion. Mortimer: No. Tammy: Not again, you robot bitches! Bert: [gathers weapons and ammo] Good thing I stole this. Now let's get the damn out of there. Mick: I'm staying, guys. This is it. This is my new life. Bert: Sounds good. Tammy: Okay. It was nice being your friend. Bye. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Robot Ex-Wife: You have pleased us tremendously. And now we will all go on a cruise. Robot Ex-Wife: A sex cruise. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Mortimer: Guys, I n-never told you this, but...I'm terrified of having sex with a robot. Bert: There's no shame in that, Mortimer. Tammy: Oh, did something happen to you when you were young? Mortimer: Just drop it, Tammy. Mick: I'll bet it did, you randy bastard. Did you get your ram jacked? Mortimer: I mean, it wasn't a robot, but it was a man in a silver shirt. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
[after Bert got done doing sex with Robot Ex-Wife] Robot Ex-Wife: Very satisfying. Bert: Ugh. Tammy: Did they make you their king? Bert: If by king you mean, I just had the most brutal sex in my life. Then yes. Mick: Och, you lucky bastard. Tammy: Bert, how could you? Bert: I admit that I am truly gifted when it comes to sex. Tammy: It's true. Bert: I have the stamina of a centaur in the sack. Tammy: I get so tired. Bert: I've served more beef than Burger King, but any more of this, and it will kill my Whopper Jr. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Mortimer: Hey, Mick, weren't you saying something about Robot Ex-Wives? Mick: See, it's a whole planet of gold diggers. They marry rich guys and then divorce them for the golf instructor. They think we're rich. Mortimer: No, Mick, they don't think that at all. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
[Bert, Tammy, Mortimer, and Mick get transported to another place when the Robot Ex-Wife zaps them] Mortimer: What...what just happened? Tammy: Did we die? Is this heaven? Mick: Check out the loot. This must be the planet of robot ex-wives, by the way. Bert: This is where we live now. Tammy: We're rich. But why? How? Bert: Well, Tammy, clearly this is our reward for being so good at what we do. Tammy: Oh, that makes sense. Bert: [sees a big TV] Alright come to papa. [Robot Ex-Wife grabs Bert] Robot Ex-Wife: Our people need golf instructors. Bert: Sure. I'll, uh, get right on that. Robot Ex-Wife: And it is time for my lesson. [takes Bert with him] Bert: Hey, hey! Hey, hey! Mortimer: Guys, I-I have a bad feeling. We clearly do not know how to play golf. Mick: You're right. We do not know how to play golf. Tammy: Mm, what's that? I couldn't hear you over all this fur. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago
Rich Guy Divorcee: Moo, moo, sea cow! Just came by to redecorate the house I had to give you. Fire away! [the inanimate object team fires golf balls at the Rich Guy's divorced wife's house] Bert: Whoa. Mortimer: That is totally boss. Mick: Hello, hello. Bert: Damn. [Robot Ex-Wife approaches] Rich Guy Divorcee: Whoa. Where's the baby weight? You been working out, huh? Did you lose it so you can whore it up all over town? Oh, man, I miss you. Robot Ex-Wife: Get ahold of yourself. How are the kids? Rich Guy Divorcee: They, uh...they converted to Mexicanism. Robot Ex-Wife: Oh, no. Rich Guy Divorcee: Hola. Robot Ex-Wife: We hardly ever talk. Oh well. [lasered his divorce husband] Bert: HEY! That guy owed us 10 grand. What are you gonna do about it? [Robot Ex-Wife crushed his divorced husband's head] Mortimer: I don't think she's about to pay us 10 grand. Tammy: [to Bert] Oh, baby, get her. Get her, baby. SICK HER! SICK HER! Bert: Uh, alright, Tammy. Alright, well, we don't -- [pushes Tammy back away from Robot Ex-Wife] Tammy: What are you looking at, you shiny bitch? Bert: Come on, Tammy. Come on, baby. Mick: You can do this. Bert: Alright. Mick: Just go psycho like a bloody chimpanzee. [Bert headbangs the robot with his weak pinhead then leaves immediately] Bert: Okay, let's go I killed her. – Soul Quest Overdrive Movie Quote	added 5 months ago

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