Xavier:
Enchante. I am your mental mentor, your sensei of the senses, here to teach you the ways of life, love, culture. Let's start with early matisse. Do you find the gar mange of his lines to be derivative of the neoclassicists in their pastel insouciance?
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts]
Xavier:
I know what you mean. You mean, "I don't know what you mean."
Xavier:
I shall teach you to speak. I'm a great english teachulator. You want me to tit you? One grunt for "yes".
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts] [grunts]
Xavier:
Ooh, you want it double bad, huh? Okay, two grunts will mean "no". Three grunts means "cheese". Can you say cheese?
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts] [grunts] [grunts]
Xavier:
I've got to prioritize these words right. Let's see -- Four grunts will mean "prioritize".
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts] [grunts] [grunts] [grunts]
Xavier:
And that's how you say "clock".
Xavier:
Well, I think I taught you every word and stretch there is. Say cheese.
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts] [grunts] [grunts]
Xavier:
So, what do you want to do now?
Manly Naked Beast:
[grunts] [grunts] [grunts] [grunts] [grunts]
Xavier:
WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO COMMIT SUICIDE?!
[Manly Naked Beast shoots himself splitting into two people]
Xavier:
I know you crave release from your misery, but you've just doubled your depression.
[one of the two Manly Naked Beasts chainsawed and hang himself to death growing more manly naked beasts into quadruples]
Xavier:
You've just quadrupled your squagmire.
[all of the tiny manly naked beasts suicide themselves into a woodchipper]
Xavier:
Your immortality is a cursed cage. Death is the gift you shan't receive.
