Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #117

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 5,763 quotes total — keep up the great work!

[Xavier drinks brain juice to find memory information of what happened to the motel]

Preacher:
Before we sing our glorious praise to the Lord, it is my sad duty to announce that our sign-language translator has donated her hands to the needy groper society.

Preacher:
In her place, we have Popo, a very special gorilla from the research center who has been studying sign language under the tutelage of my wife, June, for three years.

Citizen Woman #1:
[man voice] [thinking] This gorilla is good. She's blessed with the holy spirit.

Preacher:
[thinking] That animal...so beautiful. What are these feelings coming over me? Is she capable of feeling to same way of me?

June:
[thinking] Strange. I feel like someone is raping me with their eyes.

[Xavier's brain juice memory ends]

Xavier:
Ooh, that woman. So beautiful. I just know she feels the same way about me. She was totally checking me out. [sniffs] Yeah, we're soul mates. I shall now vow to make her my bride. [grunts] There -- Vow locked in.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Injured Guy:
Hey, freak. We don't cotton to weirdos in our town. So scram before I make you taste pain.

[the geese took out the Injured Guy's eye with its beak and flew away]

Xavier:
Dead? What do you see? What's the afterlife look like? What visions? [suddenly gets deuced by some bird poop]

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Narrator Girl:
Allow that I should weave thee a tale of a land angel, a sand-seeker who perchanced upon a crossroads.

Narrator Girl:
He stood at the fork, awash in the feculent knowledge that which path he chose would brand his life evermore.

Narrator Girl:
He opened the of his soul's eye to providence, unwilling to move until he was sure which direction was holy most.

[10 Minutes Later]

Narrator Girl:
Finally, he felt a cosmic hand guiding him to the path on the left. [echoes]

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Xavier:
It's what separates the wheat of beasts from the chaff of chaps -- Free will. Man's most potent mirage. Do I have the free will to turn this desert into an ocean of a wooze?

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Subtitles:
This is dedicated to all the proud father who served at Burning Man.

Subtitles:
Not the mothers.

Subtitles:
They know what they've done.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Firefighter #1:
Where does this vaporizer stuff go anyway? [while throwing the dead bodies into the vaporizer portal]

[cuts to the next scene where its reveal that the vaporizer goes into a oxygen space planet]

Squat Guy #4:
Dope planet, man! I think I'll make myself at home, brah.

[187 appears on the planet from the vaporizer]

187:
[mumbling]

Squat Guy #4:
Sorry, brah brah, have to ask you to bail. I got here first. [echoing] SQUATTERS' RIGHTS!

[Squat Guy #4 then gets crushed by a big potato]

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
THREE POTATO, NINE!

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Squat Woman #2:
Hey, everybody, they're igniting the effigy!

[the sperm buddy goes into the Burning Person's vagina making her pregnant to explode to catch every squat citizen on fire]

Squat Guy #5:
WE'RE ALL SPECIAL!

Squat Guy #6:
WE'RE ALL PART OF THIS!

Squat Guy #7:
THIS IS MORE LIKE IT!

Squat Woman #3:
BURNING PEOPLE!

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
THIS IS DEMOCRACY -- PERSONIFIED!

Squat Guy #8:
ME, ME, ME!

[after the Burning Person incident where every citizen was roasted to death]

Firefighter #1:
How do you suppose this happened anyway?

Firefighter #2:
I think it was arson.

Xavier:
No. It was my son. [referring to his sperm buddy]

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Squat Woman #2:
Hey, everybody! Me and 187 are getting hitched!

Tude:
Never thought that slave would get tied down.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
Dude! Dude! I've been looking all over for you! I intuited you'd be here, 'cause I know how you crave structure.

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
There's something I have to tell you. I'm your father.

Tude:
I have a dad! I'm a Puggler by blood! A Puggler!

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
And, mostly, I wanted to give you this precious heirloom.

[Puggler gives Xavier's Crystal to Tude]

Puggler the Punk-Rock Juggler:
It's been in the family for as long as I can remember right now.

Xavier:
THE SERPENTINE CRYSTAL!

Tude:
I can't accept this for myself, 'cause I hate you, Dad! You're smothering me, man! Just get off my back! Give me space, fascist!

[Tude throws Xavier's Crystal away]

Xavier:
No! [echoes]

[as Xavier's crystal was about to go into the portal, Sperm Buddy saves it]

Xavier:
Your spunk in the face of my cruelty has made me realize that I haven't been a good father to you. From now on, every day, I'm going to tell you about the birds and the bees. [whispers to C*m Buddy] But, like, the bees are totally... [mumbles] that butthole.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Squat Woman:
This year, we can truly leave no trace on the playa, with the De-Garbage Eco-Vaporizer.

Squat Guy #4:
Oh, dope! I want to leave no trace!

[Squat Guy #4 went inside the De-Garbage Eco-Vaporizer transporting him to another place]

Squat Woman:
What a great environmentalist. He went off the grid. [looks at the viewers] Won't YOU go off the grid?

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Tude sees the Burning Person model]

Tude:
Such a structure, bro. This is just what I needed for fulfillage.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Xavier:
Have you seen Puggler, the Punk-Rock Juggler? He's wearing a top hat.

Squat Guy #3:
I think I saw him over there.

Xavier:
Puggler?

Pester the Punk-Rock Jester:
Who's Puggler? I'm Pester, the Punk-Rock Jester who lives off his seed.

Xavier:
Puggler?

Junk the Juggling Punk:
No, brah, I'm Junk, the Juggling Punk who lives his seed.

Xavier:
I'm looking for Puggler.

Random Punk Rocker:
I think he took off, man, to go to Burning Person or something.

Xavier:
We're at Burning Person.

Random Punk Rocker:
I went to Burning Person this year?

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Tude:
Okay, you find Puggler, and I'm gonna go find the structure. Man, where's 187?

[cuts to the next scene where 187 is partying with the Squat people]

Tude:
This guy is slave to the beats, man!

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Squat Guy:
Oh, man, I'm getting in The Bubbler! Sweet!

[The big bubble pops which the made the citizen fall and break every one of his bones]

Squat Guy:
Oh, my god, dude, that was so dope! Burning Person rules!

Squat Guy #2:
Wait! Did you touch soap, dude?

Squat Guy:
NOOOO! [gets incinerated to pieces]

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Xavier:
Can we get going?

Tude:
Man, I must have wolfed a mind burrito 'cause I just had a massive brain fart.

Tude:
We got to take 187 with us to Burning Person! He said he's never partied before. What better party than the ultimate party?!

187:
[agreed mumbling]

Tude:
We're gonna go to Burning Person, [to Xavier] he's gonna get his Dad's crystal, [to 187] you're gonna get to freedom, I'm gonna get the structure I crave.

C*m Buddy:
[whimpers]

Tude:
What's that, little fella?

C*m Buddy:
[whimpers]

Tude:
And we're gonna get this little guy laid.

187:
[mumbling]

C*m Buddy:
[whimpers]

Tude, 187, & Sperm Buddy:
[laughter]

Xavier:
Life. [echoes]

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Xavier:
We must have connected to an existing tunnel system. Maybe this is the original underground railroad.

[a black old slave guy crawls out of the underground railroad]

Tude:
Dude, there's an old slave still hiding down here. That's hardcore, man.

187:
[mumbling]

Tude:
He must be 187 years old. I'm gonna call you 187, 'cause it's 187 on the mother-loving cop. Right, up top?

187:
[mumbling] Up top.

Tude:
I totally know what you went through, man. I was a slave to TV for a while, and then I was a slave to pop culture, and I craved the grave. Total bummage, man.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Tude:
So, what's so special about that crystal anyways, brah?

[Xavier's flashback intensifies]

Young Xavier:
What's that necklace, daddy?

Xavier's Dad:
It represents my feeling for you.

Young Xavier:
Where'd you get it?

[Xavier's Dad flashbacks his scene where he's in the restroom peeing in a urinal toilet and also peeing a cleaning product shaping a crystal and hanging it around its neck while winking at the audience]

Young Xavier:
What's that necklace, daddy?

Xavier's Dad:
I'll give it to you when you become a man.

[Xavier's flashback ends]

Tude:
Well, at least you had a dad. I never knew mine. Sometimes I think the structure I truly crave is the family structure.

Xavier:
Shut it.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Xavier:
Sorry, I couldn't get any tools.

Tude:
Cool, dude! You brought a buddy along for the trip. Come, buddy. [literally lets a sperm buddy dog lick his face]

Xavier:
I'm not bringing that Johnny-come-lately with us.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Xavier reads the sexy magazines to sell his seed]

Xavier:
Huh! I wonder what's inside these saucy magazines anyway.

[Xavier flips a page]

Xavier:
OHH! OH, CARUBISLAW! I really was backed up.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Xavier sells his seed to a sperm bank]

Xavier:
Ma'am, I'd like to make some seed money. Hello? I'd like to peddle my puddle, ma'am. Yoo-hoo! I'd like to hawk my loogie.

Business Woman:
[scoffs] We pay by the cup or by the noseful.

Xavier:
Um, cup, please. I'm kind of nervous. I've never plopped my glopper. Been saving myself for marriage or at least consent.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Tude:
Thanks for coming, man. Listen, you got to get me out of here! I'm going stir crazy with all this freedom! I'm smothering here, man!

Xavier:
I've got my own problems, lady.

Tude:
I'm sick of living off my seed. I want to work with my hands. I got to shake these shackles of anarchy.

Xavier:
Why don't you just leave?

Tude:
If I leave, that's a choice, man. I can't stand any more choices. You got to break me out, man! Sneak me into a prison.

Xavier:
I'll smuggle you out of here if you show me the way to Burning Person, to find my crystal.

Tude:
But I can't go there. It's too free. I crave structure.

Xavier:
Well, the effigy at Burning Person is the biggest structure in North America. I'll get us there by way of underground railroad.

Tude:
Deal. Start digging.

Xavier:
That's not the way an underground railroad works. We need money for shovels. Give me some pocket dollars.

Tude:
I don't even have pockets.

Xavier:
Then go sell some of your seed.

Tude:
That would be choice, fascist! Why don't you sell your seed?!

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Mohawk Guy gives Xavier a tour about Squatopia]

Mohawk Guy:
Yep, we were the first to squat a whole town, brah.

Xavier:
Okay --

Mohawk Guy:
These are the crash couches. Rip up some Z's, if you please.

Mohawk Guy:
This is the Freedom Fountain and the public toilet. Hey, Squatters' Rights!

All:
SQUATTERS' RIGHTS!

Xavier:
Yeah, but, you see, the crystal belonged to my father. He was murdered.

Mohawk Guy:
This is the Wreck Center, brah, where we wreck things. And over there, that's Chinatown. Hey, Squatters' Rights!

China Man:
YOU GET OUT OF HERE NOW! [gong sound effect]

Mohawk Guy:
Only one rule here, brah -- No rules. Anyone caught with rules has to wear the scarlet "F." [to the tied up man with a painted "F" on his face] Fascist.

Xavier:
That crystal is the most important thing in my life.

Mohawk Guy:
If I need any cash, I just sell my seed, brah. You know, if I'm really desperate, I scrape the seed off the couches and sell it. One day, we'll squat the globe.

Xavier:
The thief had a unicycle. Did you see him?

Mohawk Guy:
That was Puggler. You should have asked me before. You'll never catch up to brah now. He went to B.M.

Xavier:
In the Freedom Fountain?

Mohawk Guy:
No, burning man. Actually, this year, we're not gonna be sexist. We're calling it Burning Person. In today's day and age, women can be set on fire, too.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Puggler the Punk Rock Juggler:
Squatters' Rights! [steals Xavier's crystal] So long, square!

Xavier:
That guy just stole my significant crystal.

Mohawk Guy:
That's impossible, brah. There's no stealing here, for this is [introducing] SQUATOPIA!

Xavier:
I know. That other guy told me. [referring to Puggler]

Mohawk Guy:
You knew bra, and you still made me do that ridiculous introduction, dude? You sick sack of -- You're alright. Gooble gobble.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Puggler the Punk Rock Juggler:
As soon as you pass this line, you will enter [introducing] SQUATOPIA -- A fully self-sustained, anarchist commune, a land with no rules and no laws to bind and restrict the soul and the heart. Freedom -- Personified.

Xavier: Renegade Angel  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

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