Timothyj.29104's Quotes Page #105

Here's the list of quotes submitted by timothyj.29104  —  There are currently 6,240 quotes total — keep up the great work!

[Surfer God shows Steve a flashback on why he hates him]

Steve Smith:
Oh, my god. How did I forget that?

Surfer God:
I made brains wonky. I left out key parts. You can't put the banana in a banana nut bread once it's just nut bread. Know what I mean?

Steve Smith:
Uh, so, just the Beach Boys were murders, not all surfers.

Surfer God:
Yeah, man. Yeah.

Steve Smith:
Well...I feel great.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Steve Smith:
Alright, Steve. Just build a little shack, put a woman in there -- You'll be alright.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Surfer God:
Alrighty. Are y'all ready for number 2?

Baby Cakes:
I hope it's not "Give up on your dreams".

Surfer God:
Don't Give Up On Your Dreams!

Baby Cakes:
Yes!

Professor Cakes:
What the f*** is this?! He sucks.

Surfer God:
Let's blaze another one! Commandment Number 3 is Experience The Magic. Catch y'all on the flipside!

Professor Cakes:
This -- This is silliness. I have work to do. Frank, give me the prototype.

Frank Smith:
[using Haardvark] No! This piece be rollin' solo with me, yo. T'ain't no troubs for the bubs.

Baby Cakes:
[to his Dad] God's will, right?

Professor Cakes:
That God -- Jimmy F***ing Buffett -- No. And Frank is a stupid influence. You're -- You're dumber now.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Professor Cakes:
So, really, God came down and he surfed?

Baby Cakes:
Into our hearts. Look at him. He's such a McConaughey. So best for the product.

Frank Smith:
[using Haardvark] That is non-phony, tenderoni.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Frank uses the Haardvark]

Frank Smith:
This lecture will seem particularly dry, so I'm gonna drop sh*t that'll taste hella bad. Yet you may find that it resonates with your own experiences. But check it -- Grip tight, and y'all be feeling me. Word.

Flip Flop:
Is someone talking to me?

Professor Cakes:
It works! [laughs]

Frank Smith:
Y'all just snack up on that down piece. Y'all got troubs for bubs. Draw down cuttlenut.

Stacy:
Oh, poor Nixon. Those aren't even ground for impeachment.

Frank Smith:
True! Everything be sweet-ass cream up in that fillout. LOL. WWGD? Subatomic fuggletouching me keeping my pickle in that hospitalino, yo. Word out.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Frank Smith:
Even though God exists, we should probably just continue on with watergate, right?

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Surfer God:
Now, let's take a look at my old commandments. I kind of half-assed it. I mean, "Thou Shalt Not Rape" should been in there. Lots of people are doing it 'cause it's not in there.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Pony's Mom:
And also, Pony, you need to go to church.

Pony:
Mom, let's just have these pre-drinks and get to the stadium.

Pony's Mom:
Pony, you shouldn't drink diablo water so much. It's bad for your belly. I never drank it, and look at me. Sh*t, I look good.

Pony:
Mom! I'm not like you, okay? I can't follow God's crazy-hard commandments or whatever.

Pony's Mom:
You see what I deal with, Boss Smith? An alcoholic anarchist.

Steve Smith:
Yeah, Pony's a mess. Let me ask you something. You're into God. I've got a girl in my life. She's into God. We got out, we date, she's sexy, but there is nothing beyond kissing. Now, I'm gonna meet her at the game later. Is there anything that maybe -- You know what? Uh, don't worry about it.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Frank Smith:
So, what the f*** is an Aardvark?

Professor Cakes:
It's the Haardvark, see, because kids all talk hard. Plus the receptor ears and the translation matrix look, um, aardvark-like. The name's a place holder.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Frank Smith:
So, we left off with Nixon feeling the pressure to resign. The, um, Supreme Court demanded the tapes, and the, um -- The House and the Senate were wanting to impeach.

Wendeloquence:
Come on, man. At least try to spice this up. I mean, even the Robert Redford movie was better than this.

Frank Smith:
Hey, I -- You -- You've got MTV brain, and I -- Nuance -- [gives up] Ohh.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Steve Smith:
So, hottest woman ever -- Sweater beard, go.

Sweater Beard:
Cleopatra?

Steve Smith:
Uh, when you say, "Cleopatra", I think "Liz Taylor". Then I think "Michael Jackson", and then my penis dies.

Steve Smith:
Um, Chinese Precious, go.

Chinese Precious:
Um, the Florence Nightingale.

Steve Smith:
Warmer. Warmer. You know, your English is really firming up. Trouble Bubble, go.

Trouble Bubble:
Wha? Why am I "Trouble Bubble"?

Steve Smith:
Dude, you fart in class, and that's really selfish. Anyway, hottest woman ever -- The Virgin Mary.

Pemsy:
Um...she was technically the least sexual person ever, right?

Matt Attack:
Pemsy, you -- Your voice makes me mad instantly.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Baby Cakes and Professor Cakes finally makes love with themselves without the total validation]

Derrick:
This is how it's supposed to be. People don't need total validation. I'm gonna blow up the clinic tomorrow morning.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Baby Cakes:
Oh, Dad, you've never threatened to leave me before.

Hobo #1:
He never threatened to leave you before?! Sh*t, you're a lunatic!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Kally's Mom:
Steve, take me with you!

Steve Smith:
Sorry, babe, small car.

Kally's Mom:
I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING! I F***ED YOU WITH THAT STICK OF BUTTER! [crying]

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Steve Smith:
So, I'm supposed to care about every inanimate object in my life because it could secretly love me?!

Kally's Dad:
YOU'RE A PSYCHOPATH! YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED AROUND MY DAUGHTER! [crying]

Kally:
Oh, don't worry, Dad -- I already hate him!

Kally's Dad:
"TOY MOVIE 3" IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER MADE!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Hobo #1:
Man, this is the best soap we ever drank!

Hobo #2:
Have you tried that hand sanitizer? Doper than soap.

Hobo #1:
Can I get real, for real? I hate houses!

Hobo #2:
I'm so f***ing glad I'm not in a house. F***ing ladies locking up soap at night. They know I wanted it!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Baby Cakes sees his bed sheets unmade]

Baby Cakes:
Son of a bitch! My bed was slept in...BY A PILE OF F***ING STREET TROLLS! Dad can't stop me now.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Kally's Dad sees her wife having sex with Steve]

Kally's Dad:
BRENDA, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU! Kally says you don't like "Toy Movie 3"! HOW?!

Steve Smith:
[scoffs] That's what you're mad about?!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Baby Cakes crashes his own house]

Baby Cakes:
Motherf***ers! Oh, what's up, Dr. Falgot?

Dr. Falgot:
Baby Cakes, what the hell?!

Baby Cakes:
Hey, we're the same! See my badge? Total Validation said I'm more right than Dad!

Dr. Falgot:
Wait, that can't be right 'cause you're an awful pig boy.

Baby Cakes:
Exactly!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Derrick:
Okay, Leonard, your turn. Imagine your son tells you that he wants to burn your face with acid. What do you say?

Professor Cakes:
Uh, what do I say? I say -- I say, "Go right ahead because you're my son, and I must love you unconditionally".

Derrick:
[loved] Oh, are you just telling me what I want to hear?

Professor Cakes:
Hey, Derrick, do me a favor. Go f*** yourself.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Matt Attack:
So, you mean every guy doesn't have to buy everything their girls want? Just me in my specific relationship with Kim?

Mohawk Guy:
Uh-huh, precisely, Matt.

Matt Attack:
See? Right there, that is crazy, y'all! Y'all can't see that that's crazy?!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Frank and Pony sees Steve's car at a Miata Chop Shop]

Frank Smith:
Panty sniffin'! [laughs] Say, do you happen to know a guy named Miata Mike?

Car Engineer Guy:
MIKE! Two girls are here to see you, man!

Pony:
Listen, Mike...

Miata Mike:
Uh, ba-ba-ba. It's Miata Mike.

Pony:
Miata Mike. What would it take, nonsexual, to get the car back?

Miata Mike:
Hmm, $5,000.

Frank Smith:
F*** no! I don't have $5,000! We need to be at the lake f***ing immediately! Okay...$150. W-What would that get us?

Miata Mike:
For $150, I'll give you a ride, but I keep the car.

Frank Smith:
That's f***ing weird.

Miata Mike:
What can I say? I'm Miata Mike.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

[Steve and Kally's Family gets into an argument about Toy Movie 3]

Kally's Dad:
YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND UNIVERSAL THEMES!

Steve Smith:
[grunts]

Kally:
It's a sweet, sweet movie!

Steve Smith:
No, no, that movie is about a kid's unhealthy relationship with some objects!

Kally's Dad:
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Steve Smith:
It'd be different if he knew that those objects loved him, but he doesn't!

Kally's Dad:
No! Oh, please!

Steve Smith:
And that kid is not ready for college, by the way!

Kally's Dad:
No, don't you see?! It's sublime!

Steve Smith:
No!

Kally's Dad:
It's for everyone, but it's also for really wise people!

Steve Smith:
Oh, no, it is for people who are pro-slavery!

Kally:
WHAT?! PRO-SLAVERY?!

Kally's Dad:
ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME?!

Steve Smith:
Yes, it's about property that should be so devoted to the master...

Kally's Dad:
No!

Kally:
No, shut up!

Steve Smith:
...that they'll do anything to get back to him so that he can use them again.

Kally's Dad:
Ah, Steve!

Kally:
Stop it!

Steve Smith:
They are party slaves, and he doesn't even know they have feelings!

Kally's Dad:
YOU FOOL, IT'S ABOUT GOD AND DEATH!

Steve Smith:
No, no, no!

Kally's Dad:
IT'S ABOUT EVRYTHING!

Kally:
It has heart!

Steve Smith:
[groans loudly]

Kally:
Where's your heart?

Steve Smith:
Oh, my god, KALLY!

Kally's Dad:
I CRIED! BUT I CRIED SO F***ING HARD!

Steve Smith:
Come on, Bob!

Kally's Dad:
AND YOU ARE A F***ING MONSTER!

Steve Smith:
AND YOU ARE PRO-HOARDING!

Kally's Dad:
I HATE YOU!

Kally:
He didn't even like the ending, Dad!

Kally's Dad:
OH, HOW?!

Steve Smith:
KALLY!

Kally's Dad:
THEY WERE ALL CRYING ABOUT DYING!

Steve Smith:
[scoffs]

Kally's Dad:
Alright, okay, you tell me, what is a good movie?!

Steve Smith:
I don't know -- "Last Tango In Paris".

Kally's Dad:
WHAT?! THEY USE BUTTER AS ANAL LUBE IN THAT FILM!

Steve Smith:
It's a classic movie about adults doing what adults do.

Kally:
Oh, you're a f***ing pervert!

Steve Smith:
I'M A F***ING ADULT!

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

Derrick:
So, before we get started, is there anything you need to confess?

Baby Cakes:
I'm Batman.

China, Il  Movie Quote

added 4 months ago

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